Hi there! I have one story on this site, but I'm hoping you're willing to read it and give me feedback. It's entitled, "Wish Making For Idiots," and is a mock-guide book on the subject of wish-making. It's intended to be humorous, only 9 chapters long at this point in time. Hit me up!
Grave Robin By: Mister Mayhem
Traveler By: Thomas Boyle
Tommy's Rainy Day By: Allyson Andrews
Dee Dee's Spring Break By: Allyson Andrews
Golden World By: Thomas Boyle
Thanks for the comment! And don’t you know breaking hearts is the most fun a person can have in life :P Muahahaha. Ahem. Anyway, I’m glad you thought this chapter was well-written and that the fighting was interesting. I’ve never really written something like this before, where it’s just fight after fight after fight for a long stretch. It took its toll on me, and I wasn’t altogether sure that it stayed interesting. I try to vary things as much as I can (hence why Janelle happened to run into the only two Gifted who weren’t Gifts of Air :P) and make people use different weapons, so I’m glad it was effective. Anyway, I guess Janelle’s problem is that she’s expecting the worst without hoping for the best at all :P She finds it impossible to see a situation where they’ll come out on top, and that, like Ben/you point out, is pretty bad for morale all round. Heh, Benelle works quite well as a shipping name, doesn’t it xD It helps when they have letters in common in convenient places :P Still, Janelle certainly has quite a way to go before she’s ready for another relationship. She’s still not over Reagan and even is she was at peace with his death, letting someone else in would mean potentially losing them in the same way she lost him. And who knows? Maybe she’ll lose Ben too and they’ll never get to talk at all ;)
I always knew that Brooke would die in this fight. Ever since she and Evelyn entered the story, I knew I would kill one of them and I knew it would be Brooke. I did try and throw the scent of her a little, by making Janelle and Wesley talk about Carey. I mean, whenever someone says “I’ll see you when I get back” or “you’ll see her when you get back” that person’s going to die, right? :P I guess my attempts were fruitless though, cos you figured out it would be Evelyn/Brooke anyway xD Anyway, Brooke’s death will certainly effect them all, even the ones who didn’t know her all that well. I guess none of them ever expected her to die. Even without realising it, they sort of felt she had this… Immunity, I suppose, because of her age. But no, she’s just as likely to die as anyone else – maybe more than anybody, actually, since she’s young and therefore not as strong physically as the older characters. But now they’ll realise more than ever that they are fighting a war where the innocent will be caught in the middle, where fourteen year old girls and any other vulnerable people are just as in danger as everyone else.
By the rebel’s standards, this battle was technically a victory despite the massive casualties. They did do what they set out to do, after all – they killed quite a number of Gifted and made a point. But I suppose what this chapter aims to point out is that the rebels can train and fight as hard as they can but they’ll always be at a disadvantage because the Gifted are simply better prepared; they’re better trained and they have powers the rebels don’t. Being a ragtag bunch of misfits can only get you so far :P I can’t say much else than that because it’ll be addressed in later chapters, but the rebels will be at the end of the line very soon if things keep going the way they have.
C. M. Brighid Bachleda