Status: In Progress
Summary:
Inoue Yuki's best friend Kurosawa Mariko's family and self have been slaughtered by some merc for hire. Yuki was blinded in the process of protecting her friend. 12 years later Things start to get weird and everyone she knows Is dieing. If something isn't done in time, Everyone in the world could end up dead.
Please critique.
If it seems like the plot is driving Yuki and not visa versa, then mission accomplished, that's what I was going for.
This is just the first draft, things may change in the second draft.
Created: January 15, 2015 | Updated: January 29, 2015
Genre : Supernatural
Language : English
Reviews: 2 | Rating:
Favorites: 5
Reads: 4716
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1: | Prologue | 597 |
2: | Chapter One | 1588 |
3: | Chapter Two | 1675 |
4: | Chapter Three | 1618 |
5: | Chapter Four | 1174 |
6: | Chapter Five | 1325 |
7: | Chapter Six | 1634 |
8: | Chapter Seven | 1005 |
9: | Chapter Eight | 1034 |
Total Wordcount: | 11650 |
Reviews (2)
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I read a lot of books in my spare time, many that are good, others that are not as good. I have to admit that this one is one of the good ones. It is shaping up to rival some books that are in print right now! I'm only in chapter three, but can't wait to see what happens next. Keep up the good work!
Rating:
March 8, 2015 Flag
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I think the book is very good so far. The plot is interesting and so far the characters seem well developed. The only thing I would recommend is the to go through and reread all of it for flow as some parts seem a little choppy, and also, your translations were very helpful so you might want to also make sure that some of your important translations all have the english versions. Side note for formatting: For dialogues, if you hold shift when hitting enter, the gap between lines will be less noticable and cause less of (if any) pause in your mind when reading. Good luck finishing the book, and I look forward to seeing where it goes from here.
Rating:
January 17, 2015 Flag