Sparkatale

I know this won't count as critique, but when I started getting into this- it hurt me in the feels. I remembered back when I was introduced to the topic of 'Salem Witch Trials' in school. I never liked the Puritans at ALL for what they did and ugh, the screaming kids described in the story reminded me of how annoying they were in the visually movie I seen in class. So props for bring back those screams and body flops xD And another thing is that the writing makes me thing of the bible which makes it ironic they did talk that way in real life! (Don't worry that's pretty good, will you ever do a religious story? Curious. Would like to see some in your mixture) 

I'm speechless.... Your comment was just so.... detailed in advice! Can I just say, thank you? Like, thank you a bunch with a cherry on top? I had to read over your comment three times before realizing, 'holy fudge cakes, THIS DUDE (OR GAL) IS AWESOME!'.

I do confess that first-person POV is something out of my comfort zone as I usually do third-person POV.  I also admit that the 'eh' and (recently) added 'CRUNCH' was pretty awkward, but at the time, I didn't know what to change it into to. Still, I am speechless that you would give additional advise on the fight AND how it could be presented then transitioned into the first chapter. I DIDN'T EVEN THINK ABOUT A IDEA LIKE THAT. Golly ;3;    Here, you deserve a cookie *gives cookie*  It will take time, but I'll definitely use that idea. Thank you again. 

Sorry I didn't reply sooner! Have a nice day. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my story AND critiquing it! I usually don't have reviews like this so I never really knew what I needed improvement on. You can imagine how grateful I am to read things like this. Nonetheless, I will take your advice under consideration and HOPEFULLY by then, my chapters will improve with descriptions and such. Stay tuned!

Thank you again. Have a good day.  

Thank you! You don't know how grateful I am from your comment! Sorry, if I'm a little bit on the nutty side; I just don't get a lot of reviews in which are specific about what needs to be improved or what needs to be fixed. I usually get a lot of 'yes, this is good' or a simple 'good' in general. I'll totally take your words into heart and improve the story as much as I can. Hopefully the next chapter will be MUCH BETTER than this one. Lol.

Thanks again ! Have a nice day.

I'm loving this stuff! You weren't joking on being on a writing streak :D

I really enjoyed this small foreshadowing ^-^ Please make more, you're really good.