Sparkatale

    As a writer, getting a critique or review from someone is probably one of the most helpful things. Especially if they tell me what they like the most and what doesn't work for them. When I'm doing this for a fellow author I especially like to give critiques from a Reader's POV and from a Writer's POV. As a Reader and Writer we can see what catches an audiences' attention from an entertainment perspective and from a technical perspective.

Here are some things that you can take into consideration when you are critiquing someone else's writing:

1. The tense of the story. If a story starts off in past tense it shouldn't change to present tense ever. The only exceptions to this is for creative purpose, (Ex. dream sequence, epilogues etc...)
2. The point of view of the story. This one ties in really closely with number one. If the story starts off in third person, it shouldn't change to first. And if for the majority of the story your narrative voice is limited, you shouldn't change to omniscient willy-nilly (and yes I'm using willy-nilly as a technical term).
3. Be aware of passive voice. I heard once that if you can add, 'by zombies' to a sentence and it still make sense then the author has a passive voice. Your author is telling the story, remind them of this, don't let them suggest what's happening. It's their tale not the Reader's.
4. Be aware of run-on sentences. I've said this about names too. If you have to take a mental breath, then it's too long. In the case of run-on sentences if you have to take more than one or two mental breaths (and if you do have to take one, there should be a comma) then it's too long.
5. Be aware of excessively short sentences/lack of conjunctions. There are certain parts of a story where this is acceptable. The biggest one is during action or intense scenes. You want short sentences. Because if the Reader has to slow down to comprehend your long sentence then they fall out of the flow of the story. However, if there isn't anything really intense going on (i.e. introduction of any scene before it get's serious) then every few sentences need to be combined. Otherwise the writing comes off a little adolescent and beginner. (Ex. "She sat at her desk. Her eyes were bloodshot. Her computer screen was bright. The late hour made her tired. Her name was Sally." Can be changed to: "Sally sat at her desk, her eyes bloodshot and aching from the late hour and bright computer screen before her.")
6. Unrealistic dialogue. It helps if you can say it out loud or mouth the words to yourself. If you find a place that sounds odd then you can suggest this to the writer.
7. Shallow characters. No one wants to read a story about the valley girl who learns nothing from being shallow and selfish. If you are having a hard time relating, just say that.
8. Boring start. If you pick up their book or manuscript and don't go, "Ooh!" with intrigue then it's a boring start. Just tell them that you feel the beginning could use some more suspense/action/attention grabbing sentences.
9. Too common stereotypes. If you can pretty much predict the whole story based on what they've provided then there are too many stereo types whether you know it or not. Suggest to the author that their story seems a little predictable and it could use some more variety in it's set-up.

I hope that this helped a little. I know these are the things that I use when I critique someone's writing and these are the things that I'm looking for when I let someone else read my writings.

Keep in mind what you like and remind your author that you are only trying to be helpful. (Doing this doesn't excuse your words if you're still an asshole though- so keep that in mind.)

Here are a few other things that I personally like to hear about in my writing but aren't necessarily must reviews in every story:

• How is my character development is going? Do you become more invested in my characters with each new reveal?
• Are my running gags worth it/funny?
• What are your impressions of my characters? Who is your favorite? Why? Who do you not like the most? Why? Who do you love to hate? Who are you the most annoyed with? Etc...
• How is my imagery? Can you clearly imagine what my world/people look like?
• What are your assumptions about my characters? (I also like if you write in the margins or at the end of a sentence when your first assumption occurs so I can see where you're getting it all from.)
• When you put it down, do you ever think about it before you pick it back up again? And I mean more than just, "Oh, I need to finish critiquing that!"

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Also, my apologies for the double thread. I don't know why it happened and I find it really irritating.

Retrograde Heartbreak | September 7, 2015