Status: In Progress
Summary:
Created: October 19, 2013 | Updated: October 19, 2013
Genre : Fantasy
Language : English
Reviews: 0 | Rating:
Favorites: 0
Reads: 563
Share this:
1: | The Girl from Gleanne | 2733 |
Total Wordcount: | 2733 |
Reviews (0)
Comments / Critiques
-
Chapter: 1 Reply
It looks like your female protagonist is a strong young woman. I really liked the first paragraph, the words "no crossbows" make me hooked to the chapter and were a fine theme throughout the chapter. I also noticed that the first and last paragraph built a nice frame for the chapter ("nice girl").
You smuggled quite a lot information of the story's setting, but you managed to do it in a gentle way without overwhelming with the details and names. Overall it was a fine opening chapter, the cliffhanger at the end was great.
I spotted one blunder. The "ammo" for bows is called arrows whereas for crossbows - quarrels or bolts.
October 20, 2013 | Malgorzata Wyrwas