Sparkatale

This was really good! Characters are the most important part of a story for me, and I think your characters are really interesting and well rounded. The only thing I can really critque is that sometimes you switched between third and first person, I think it was meant to be Liya's thoughts but it would be easier if you put them in italics or something so it's easier to read. I found when I pasted my stories on here from word the italics I had just disappeared lol and I had to go back and add them in, so maybe this is what happened to you. Anyway thats the only major editing thing I can think of aside from a few typos, and I'm looking forward to the rest!

Thank you very much for pointing out the missing italics! I would not have noticed myself otherwise. I really appreciate your comment on the characters since they are the ones I am focusing on the most and I'm just glad you enjoyed what I have so far. Thanks!