Sparkatale

This was a really nicely-written chapter.

It's always been a staple of your work in writing really relatable, well-described scenes with a beginning, middle and end. Even in this opening chapter you get a sense of the protagoist's (and Akeel's) personality, the character's thought process and I liked that the interest in photography he has going on. Great description of the places he lives in, as well.

One thing I would say is this line here ~~camera down on the counter in front of me. I was careful about keeping the camera safe. I didn’t want to ruin another camera.~~ it just feels like too much use of the word camera in such a short space.

Otherwise, it was a chapter that brings readers in, and I'm looking forward to the next!