Sparkatale

See my chapter comment for grammar type edits. In terms of the story and what you have, it's a start but I think you could make it even better. I got the sense that I was reading a novelized version of a magna or anime, which is wonderful since those worlds are often complex and have a great mix of realism and fantasy, drama and humor. What you need to do to make this better is to really play up those contrasts. Readers can relate to high school and the cliques while your concept of Rei-Ki is definitely fantasy. You have the serious but likable main character (Lukus) with nice cast of supporting characters who add humor (Benjamin). Yet you haven't done enough with them. The story felt flat in parts because you didn't take the time to give better character descriptions so we could connect with the characters or take the time to describe the world and how it works. There were plenty of points where you could have given us a bit of background on the world, like when they're going to school having Lukus make some sort of observation or just use the time they are walking to talk about your society (IE it was hi senior year which meant there was a lot of pressure to pick a career. Many students joined...etc etc.). Again, if readers have some superficial knowledge about what's possible in your world, when you have your main character break the mold with some sort of power or knowledge it becomes a lot more exciting. Also with that, the more detail the better. I'm not saying to describe every little movement of your character, but when first introducing someone or someplace new take a few sentences (or a paragraph is more significant) to give us some details about that person or your characters' observations about them/it. This will provide a more vivid picture of what's happening and help your readers really feel engrossed in the story. Think of all the stories you've read that you just can't put down. Chances are you can't stop reading because you feel a connection to the character, their plight, and when you're reading it you become so absorbed in the world and what's happening you don't realize you spent hours reading. That's what you want to create. It's a fine line between bogging the story down with descriptors and making it too sparse. So you have to find your balance for this story, but at the moment I think you are running on a spartan level of detail. I'm going to leave this review at that since it's getting lengthy, but if you consider what I've said here and in the chapter comments I think that this story has some real potential to be very addicting for readers.