Status: In Progress
Summary:
When trying to seek independence, a young dragon's world becomes a whirlwind of disarray. Dealing with a surprise pregnancy, crazy demons and heartless fathers, she merely tries to survive. Through it all she must make difficult choices and discovers the dark secrets of her true purpose.
Created: September 14, 2013 | Updated: July 10, 2017
Genre : Fantasy
Language : English
Reviews: 0 | Rating:
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Reads: 5837
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1: | Chapter 1 | 2515 |
2: | Chapter 2 | 2814 |
3: | Chapter 3 | 3317 |
4: | Chapter 4 | 3246 |
5: | Chapter 5 | 5146 |
6: | Chapter 6 | 5930 |
7: | Chapter 7 | 3229 |
8: | Chapter 8 | 3246 |
9: | Chapter 9 | 1757 |
10: | Chapter 10 | 1582 |
11: | Chapter 11 | 3913 |
12: | Chapter 12 | 1849 |
13: | Chapter 13 | 3852 |
14: | Chapter 14 | 1445 |
15: | Chapter 15 | 4065 |
16: | Chapter 16 | 4697 |
17: | Chapter 17 | 1910 |
Total Wordcount: | 54513 |
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Comments / Critiques
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Interesting start to your story. Other than my chapter feedback, I would watch how many ellipses you use. Otherwise this was a good beginning.September 15, 2013 | D.M. Gergen
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Thanks for reading and for the feedback! I will be more mindful :)September 16, 2013 | Lady Silvertastic
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Chapter: 1 Reply
This chapter is good, but you're dialogue is not grammatically correct. I did the same thing you're doing when I first started so a lot of people I think make this mistake. Anyways, here's how it should be: If you have a speaking verb (said, exclaimed, informed, etc) following the dialogue don't use a full stop but a comma. If you don't have a speaking verb than use the full stop (period). So for example in your story "Your ... manny... has taught you politeness well... come on, it shan't take long." Junyaho informed her...should look like "... come on, it shan't take long," Junyaho informed her. If that sentence ended with a 'he informed her' then the he would be lowercase. Hope that makes sense and helps in the future chapters.September 15, 2013 | D.M. Gergen
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Thanks for letting me know. I always appreciate feedback that helps improve my skills as a writer. I hope you enjoy future chapters :)September 16, 2013 | Lady Silvertastic