Status: Completed
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Created: August 28, 2014 | Updated: July 17, 2021
Genre : Mystery
Language : English
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Chapter: 1 Reply
Overall I thought this was a really interesting first chapter. I think you did a good job of introducing the characters (the ones we didn’t know already :P). I especially liked Clara, and I felt really bad for her (as well as Jacob) at the end. I can only imagine how much guilt she’s probably feeling. Still, hopefully his condition isn’t permanent. But I have a feeling it probably will be.
Brad also really intrigued me. I can tell he’s probably going to be important later, so I wonder what his role will be. I bet he’ll be a suspect in the murder or something, but he won’t have actually done it. Oh! Or maybe he’s a guide or something, like Rose :P That might be a bit far-fetched of a guess from the few lines about him there has been so far, but whatevs :P
Something I wondered when I was reading this chapter was whether Snow knows about Adrian. I don’t know, it didn’t come up so I was curious :P I wonder how you’d bring up something like that in a conversation.
One thing I thought seemed odd, was that Snow refers to both Kayla and Ariana Mum. Wouldn’t that get confusing? Personally if I were her I’d call one Mama or something :P But I don’t actually know anyone with two mothers, so I really have no idea what someone would do in that situation, plus I'm an easily confused person :P
Another thing. I like Snow, but… She seems almost too perfect, in a way. Beautiful, smart, modest… And she’s nice too, and non-judgemental or whatever. Plus she has a nice family and they’re super rich and everything. And she’s probably going to be the centre of a love triangle as well. I don’t know, perhaps that was intentional, seeing as the summary says her life is perfect, but I don’t really find her that relatable because of that.
Hahahahahahhahhahahahahahaha: “You know nothing, Snow” xD xD xD
October 10, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment! I'm glad you liked Clara and I hope the rest of the new cast turn out to be equally as interesting. I'm working with a positively massive cast (compared to Warehouse, which technically isn't saying all that much :P) and I want to make sure that they all have their own distinct personalities. For Clara though, I'm glad she's likeable even if she did do something immensely stupid. Jacob... I'm not sure yet if his condition is permanent or not. I don't really have an important role for him to play yet, so we'll have to wait and see.
You're right about Brad, he's definitely going to be important later on. He may even wind up being a POV character at some point, although I'm not quite sure yet. Along with the larger cast came a larger group of POV characters so I want to make sure I have a few male ones this time around. I'm sure I'll end up regretting that because I'm terrible at writing guys, but oh well :P And as to your Guide theory... well, I wouldn't dismiss any theory right away. Anything's possible.
Snow knows the whole story about Adrian. I wanted to work that in somewhere that she knew already, but it never fit anywhere. He wouldn't be a topic they would talk about all that much, so it felt weird to have it in there. I'd still like to have him mentioned though. Hmm... I'll have to give it some more thought. And Snow calling them both mom, yeah I wasn't really sure about that. I don't know anyone with two moms either so I didn't know how that would work. I'll look into that too. Of course, I'd need to figure out which one of them would be 'Mom' and which would be 'Mama' :P
Snow coming off as being perfect was done intentionally, so I'm glad you find her to be that way. Right now, her life is pretty perfect. She's never faced any real adversity or challenges and Kayla and Ariana have sheltered her from the world quite a bit as well. Over the course of the story, her perfect world will slowly start to fall down around her and her perfect image will begin to break down and we'll start to see a lot more of her flaws. That's actually where the title Snowfall comes from. It's not about the weather condition, but instead the steady breakdown of the character.
Lol, I've been waiting to use that line! I thought about awhile ago, but haven't had the opportunity to use it. As soon as I could, I knew I had to. With a name like Snow, it was too perfect not to toss that in there xD
October 10, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 2 Reply
This was a very interesting chapter. Michael seems very creepy, and I wonder what Sara’s plan is… I’m sure it will go wrong, but still. It’s all very intriguing. Anyway, I’m certain that some interesting things will be happening at this party :P
Perhaps it’s just her low self-esteem or something, but Mary doesn’t sound like the sort of person who’d fade away (judging by her appearance). I mean, black hair and grey eyes… That’s quite a striking combination, especially since black hair really isn’t all that common for Caucasian people (I’m assuming she’s Caucasian :P). Anyway, even if she’s short and stocky or plain looking you’d think that would make her stand out just a little bit :P Or maybe I just really like that combination lol.
Anyway, overall I liked Mary. I liked her more than Sara, cos I thought she seemed a little arrogant at times. Not that I didn’t like her, I just liked Mary more :P And I felt sorry for her (Sara). Although, I was a little confused about her family’s situation. I mean, she said she hated her mum and stepdad and that her house was full of misery, but what about her brother? She seemed to like him, so her family life can’t be 100% miserable. I was kind of confused about that :P
After the last part, I think Sara’s probably going to be the one to be murdered. After all, she’s obviously poking into things, that’s a pretty dangerous thing to do… I think Mary is also a possibility, but at the moment my bet’s on Sara.
By the way, I might be wrong, but wasn’t one of Kayla’s friends called Nikki as well?
October 16, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Hmm, if you think Michael is creepy now... well, I'm not saying anything at all. Let's just say lots of fun should be had at the party. I'm sure it will be a night to remember and that absolutely nothing will go wrong. Nope... nothing whatsoever :P
It's definitely a self-esteem issue for Mary. She only sees the negative aspects of herself and absolutely none of the positives. She isn't built like Sara or Snow or Emily and that's all she can see. No one has ever shown any real interest in her and she's never learned to I guess love herself. She's really hard on herself, too hard in fact. She needs to gain some self-confidence and she'll get some opportunities to do that later on. But I agree, I do love that hair/eye color combo xD
Haha, Sara really is arrogant. She'd call it confident, though :P She's very sure of herself and she's positive no one is going to outsmart her. She's very strategic. She's almost playing a game of chess, trying to think several moves ahead of her opponent. She's definitely poking her nose into things best left alone and that's never a good thing, but she is pretty smart so... who knows?
Ack, I've just realized I never mentioned that Jacob doesn't still live at home with Sara. He has his own place so Sara's left alone with her parents and doesn't get to see him as often. I need to add that in :P But yeah, she lives alone with two people that she really hates so her home life is pretty miserable.
Yeah, one of Kayla's friends was named Nikki. This Nikki started out as a placeholder name until I came up with something else but I never did. So, alas, Nikki she remained :P Thanks for commenting!
October 16, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 3 Reply
I'm slightly brain dead at the moment but I'll do my best to write a coherent comment xD
Gosh, that was horrible. Poor Mary :( Michael is just… Ugh, words cannot describe how creepy he is. I hope he gets what he deserves at some point. And Emily too. Although her words did make me curious, when she as saying stuff like “you don’t understand” to Sara. I mean, it’s no excuse for what she did but I am wondering what’s going on. Anyway, that part of the chapter was definitely written well - it was horrifying and creepy and nerve wracking when Sara was recording and stuff.
The last few lines made me nervous for Sara as well. I was like: “Oh Sara, don’t tempt fate…” Although I still think she will be the one to die, I doubt Michael will do it after he’s said that. He’s a creep, that he most certainly proved in this chapter, but if Sara dies he’s far too obvious a choice for the killer. Although I have no doubt he’ll be involved somehow. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see though… xD
Anyway, I liked Snow’s part at the beginning as well. There were more mood whiplashes in this chapter, that's for sure :P It’s nice to see Alana and Sophia again. Now I see why Sophia will have a role in this story, since she’s a detective xD One thing I thought was odd – wouldn’t Sophia have kept her old last name? I mean, she was pretty old when she was orphaned, so… I feel like if I were in her position, I would have kept my old last name. But that’s probably just me.
November 6, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Haha, nothing wrong with brain dead comments. Sometimes they're the best :P Or sleepy comments either for that matter. Drunk comments however I'll have to get back to you on xD
It's so hard to talk about this story because there's more than meets the eye to pretty much everything that happens, especially this early on and I can't say a word about any of it. Let's say that there's a lot going on in that scene with Sara, Mary, Michael, and Emily that maybe isn't readily apparent. I am glad you found the scene creepy though as that's what I was aiming for. As for Sara, yeah she really did tempt fate in this chapter and we all know what a fickle witch fate can be... xD Still, I'm not saying anything.
Michael would be a very obvious suspect should Sara die, but he does have a powerful motive and he appears to be an awful enough person to kill someone. Either way, he's up to something even if I can't talk about it :P
Yeah, Sophia will be investigating the murder so she'll have a decent sized role to play. I consider her to be a guest star POV character :P She doesn't get whole chapters from her perspective, but she will occasionally get her moments. It's interesting about her last name because I wasn't sure whether to change it or have her keep it. Naturally I did what any person would do in today's world when they don't know something. I turned to the Internet for help. It seemed like some people kept their names while others changed it in order to feel more included in their new family. Some people occasionally even hyphenate it their names in that situation. In the end I figured Sophia would want to feel like she belonged a bit more and have her name changed. Wow, I've just realized that I can't remember ever giving Sophia and her dad Mike a last name :P I don't think I ever mentioned their last name at any point. I really should go back and fix that...
November 6, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 4 Reply
The beginning was interesting. I felt really sorry for Clara. I hope she at least confesses to someone what she did, even if she never turns herself into the police or whatever. Maybe if she tells Jacob himself or something, that could help. Still, it’s upsetting how she’s felt the need to change herself to fit in. But it seemed realistic, I certainly know a lot of people who've done that O.o The bit with Mary and Sara was sad too - I was thinking: "Nooo.... Go to the hospital, girl. Get that dude put in jail". But it was realistic that she didn't, because of the trauma and everything. I want to give her a hug :(
I’m not sure why, but I don’t really like Sara that much compared to the others. She just… I honestly can’t explain it xD I don’t dislike her, but I just get this vibe. I guess I’m like Clara, I just feel I can’t trust her somehow.
I’m kind of confused about Snow’s dilemma with Sara. She keeps saying that she doesn’t want to admit her feelings or whatever, but it seems to me that she does know. Maybe she hasn’t told anyone, but she’s certainly admitted them to herself. Still, poor Jackson. I want to hug him, cos I know he’s either going to get dumped or cheated on. Or both. This is why I don’t like love triangles lol. I always just end up pitying the third wheel.
Oh no, I bet something’s wrong with Ariana. Is that the thing? She was talking about how short life is and stuff, and her regrets... And she was telling Snow that she loved her. That’s classic terminal disease stuff. Nooooo, I’m really sad now :’( :’( :’(
November 14, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Hey, thanks for the comment. I'm glad you feel sorry for Clara. I keep expecting people to be like "Well, if she feels so bad about it then she should turn herself in!" but so far that hasn't happened. She does need to tell someone other than Snow, I think that would help her. It might take her a while to realize that though :P It's good you find Clara changing herself to fit in and Mary's refusal to go to the police realistic. I was a bit worried about both of those bits when I wrote them, particularly the part with Mary. Poor girl really could use a hug.
Well, Sara's not exactly appearing to be the most trustworthy person, is she? She's obviously up to something, but it's not clear what she's doing or if it's for good or for evil. So, I can understand anyone not trusting her right now. And I'm not saying you'll trust her or like her more in the future either. But then I'm not saying you won't either xD With Snow's feelings about Sara, yeah that doesn't exactly read the way I meant it to. My intention was to say that while she's fully aware of how she feels, she's not yet willing to embrace it. She's trying to resist what she feels for Sara. Reading it again, it doesn't sound that way at all. I'll work on that. Thanks for pointing that out :)
Honestly, I hate love triangles too :P I took a calculated risk with this one and I think, in the long run, it will pay off. I hope O.o But yeah, Jackson definitely deserves some pity. I mean, even if Snow and Sara never act on anything, his girlfriend is still in love with someone else. That's a bad place to be no matter what. Hmm... if I say that's the thing would that be a spoiler? Probably, so I will neither confirm nor deny just in case xD However, it's a perfectly logical guess since I did say there would be a clue in this chapter and illnesses like that do run in Ariana's family :P
November 14, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 5 Reply
I really hope you’re not a psychic and I don’t really have to wait for thirteen years for GRRM to finish the A Song of Ice and Fire series :P Although I suppose it’s a very real possibility, isn’t it xD
There were a few things I found odd. Firstly, I didn’t really understand why Sara and Snow would have sex… I mean, I know they love each other and stuff and are super attracted to each other, but they’re only sixteen, and (presumably) virgins. Plus, Sara seemed pretty awkward about her feelings when she was telling her so it seemed strange to me that they’d have sex straight away in their relationship. I mean, Kayla and Ariana’s relationship moved quickly, but then that fit the way they fell in love, while Snow and Sara have known each other for a long time so they don’t really have that whirlwind romance feeling that Kayla and Ariana had. But you’d know better than me :P I’m probably just prude.
I also felt that Snow wasn’t showing the guilt that a normal person would. Especially if she’s supposed to be a kind person, I’d expect her to be A LOT more guilty. Like later, when she was cuddling up to Sara – if I were her I’d be staying far away, no matter how much I wanted to. I know Snow’s not me, but she showed more guilt before she cheated on him than after it happened which seems weird. It seemed to me that she didn’t care about Jackson and his feelings much at all, just that she herself would suffer from losing him. And, I never got the feeling that she was that type of person, so it seemed strange to me. I did feel like she was in denial about the full weight what she’d done, but I think making her show a little more guilt wouldn’t hurt. It would make her a bit more sympathetic, because at the moment I must say I’m having a hard time feeling sorry for her and her dilemma. But then, I usually feel that way about love triangles no matter what so I’m not exactly an unbiased observer xD Sorry for all the complaining and ranting, by the way O.o I’ll move on.
Haha, it was funny when Ariana was just like “you slept with Sara”. That would definitely make for an awkward family breakfast xD She still seems kind of sad, though. Nooooo don’t be dying Ariana! I hope I’m wrong :(
The tale about the serial killer was interesting too. Even though it happened long ago, I’m sure it will be relevant… I’m not sure how though :P I think the killer was a supernatural entity of some sort so maybe it will come back at some point… I don’t think they’ll be the killer, though. I think that will be a human being, even though no one’s actually died yet so it’ll be a while before I can start guessing who did it xD And this party sounds ominous. I think someone’s not going to make it out of that night alive… >.<
November 15, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting! Lol, I hope I'm wrong too :P But I looked at his track record for the last 3 books and they've come 5 and 6 years apart. So if he keep up his track record or even if the rumors are true and he adds an 8th book... O.o
Please, never apologize for complaining :) Complaints are actually really helpful. Besides, it's not like you said "You suck. Go die." That would be hurtful :P To be honest, I struggled a lot with this chapter. I needed Snow and Sara to have sex. I know that sounds really odd, but I needed it to happen. At first I thought about taking a lot of time to build up their relationship, but I was desperately trying to avoid the slow start that 'Warehouse' had with taking a lot of time just detailing their relationship. So I really didn't want to take that much time but I had to do something. In my mind it was sort of a situation where they're sort of thinking this might be a one-time thing for them. Neither of them are sure about the future or anything and it just sort of happens. I don't necessarily like that explanation but I was never able to come up with a better way for things to work >.< I hope it's not too weird O.o And just as a point of interest, Snow is a virgin but Sara actually isn't. There's a story there, to be sure.
I agree that Snow's not nearly guilty enough in this. I was trying to play up Snow's naivety and show her denial about what she's done. You're right that she's seriously in denial over the severity of what she did. She knows it's bad, but she doesn't think its as bad as it really is and I was really focusing on that and ended up downplaying her guilt which was the completely wrong thing to do :P I'll definitely work on making her seem more guilty, because she really should be. Rereading it, she's not at all remorseful and doesn't seem to care about Jackson's feelings but she really does and that really needs to come through.
Heh, yeah Ariana's really direct about things these days :P Especially with Snow. She doesn't hesitate to say things anymore. You'll just have to wait and see what if anything is going on with Ariana, but perhaps not too much longer O.o It also won't be too much longer before you can start guessing who the murderer is either. You're getting really close to a few things, I promise. And yeah... that serial killer story means something, clearly. What, exactly? Well, I can't say xD Haha, "I think someone's not going to make it out of that night alive" I'll explain later why the wording of that sentence is a funny coincidence :P
November 15, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 6 Reply
I was glad to see Snow feeling more guilty in this chapter. I feel much more sympathy for her now, while when I read the last chapter I didn’t really feel sorry for her at all. Her guilt almost seemed too sudden after the last chapter, but I see you’ve been doing lots of editing so I think that’s probably because I’ve been caught between edits :P
Ahem, sorry for complaining again (I’m still gonna say that, cos I feel bad) but in this chapter it was Clara and Nicki I was confused by. They both seemed pretty excited about Sara and Snow, which makes sense since they’ve known they are in love and stuff, but Jackson is their friend too, isn’t he? Surely at least one of them would express disapproval, even if it was only a little bit. Still, that part was kind of funny :P It didn’t take long for them to stuff up and reveal themselves, that’s for sure. Sara isn’t very stealthy xD
Speaking of Sara, I’m getting more worried for her… I wonder who she was talking to, and what she’s planning. I know she’s probably doing something good, but I’m sure things aren’t going to end well for her. I felt sorry for Snow as well, seeing as Sara is hiding it from her. I wonder how Snow will react if Sara gets killed. It makes me sad to think of it :(
Nooooo, I’m almost certain about Ariana now. I mean, it seemed like maybe they were going to break up, but I don’t see that happening. Illness is more likely, I think. You're making my heart break :(
November 18, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Haha, yes you were caught between edits so I'm sure Snow's sudden change seems very out of place now :P I've essentially abandoned my idea of playing up Snow's naivety and have made her guilt much more prevalent instead. It really does work much better and makes Snow more sympathetic than she was before. Heh, it's funny because at work yesterday (I'm such a professional :P) I was debating whether or not I wanted to change Nikki and Clara's reaction to everything or not. While they aren't necessarily Jackson's friends (they wouldn't really have any connection with him if he and Snow weren't dating) I was thinking that at least one of them should be a bit more disapproving. I'll work on that :)
Who's to say Sara didn't spill the beans on what was going on with Snow and herself intentionally? Sara is a master manipulator and while that hasn't really come out yet, eventually it'll be pretty clear that she knows how to get people to do what she wants. Everything she does, every move she makes is meticulously planned. She likens her life to a game of chess where she has to think several moves ahead of everyone else. In this case, she suspected they would be supportive of their relationship or at least that they would accept it even if they didn't agree with it. It was a move by Sara to push Snow towards choosing her over Jackson. She thought if Snow had support from her friends, she might be more willing to dump Jackson. Whatever Sara might have said, she's not willing to sit back and let Snow stay with Jackson.
As for what Sara's up to, well you'll be waiting a while for that explanation I'm afraid. But just like everything else she has meticulously thought and planned it out in her figurative chess game. But that doesn't mean she's not playing against a chess grand master.
It's always interesting to see the reactions to the bit with Ariana and Kayla. Usually the guess is an illness, but I've gotten a couple of guesses that they might be splitting up as well. It's really interesting because whichever one it isn't, assuming it's one of those two choices, wasn't even a thought in my mind at the time I wrote it and yet both of those theories do fit that scene O.o The same thing has happened with the murder suspect. I've gotten a handful of amazingly well thought out theories about who did it and the thing is, nearly all of them really could work xD All the pieces fit and I never planned that. It's really cool. Anyway, thanks for the comment :D
November 18, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 7 Reply
Nooo, Sara! I was expecting it but still :( That whole scene was really well written and horrible. Even though I didn’t really like Sara that much (especially after what you told me after the last chapter) it was still very tragic. It was so suspenseful when Snow woke, up, because I knew someone (probably Sara) was going to be dead and then… I felt so sorry for Snow as well. Her Mum’s dying, her girlfriend/best friend is dead… The next chapter is going to be one big load of feels :(
It looks like Sara drugged Snow, but… I’m sure she probably did it to protect her or something. I mean, she seemed way too nervous after not to have. But then, she is pretty cunning, so perhaps her being nervous means she didn’t do it xD
Now, onto some theories… After this chapter, Steven seems a likely culprit. He’s too smooth. In fact, he’s almost too likely so maybe not (I’m just gonna end up saying that about everyone, aren’t I? xD). Even though Michael continues to behave suspiciously I still don’t believe it was him. I mean, he doesn’t strike me as the sharpest tool in the shed but I don’t think he’d be stupid enough to kill a girl in his own house, since he’s probably going to be a suspect because of that anyway. I do think he has a role, somehow, but… I don’t think he killed her.
Anyway, the scene with Kayla and Ariana also tugged at the heartstrings. So I was right… But that doesn’t make me happy :( Poor Ariana. I think she’ll cope, though. She’s strong. Kayla I’m probably more worried about, actually. I don’t think she’ll cope well at all with Ariana’s illness.
And I think I understand why the wording of what I said before is funny – is it because this chapter is called “That Night?” :P
November 23, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting! So, yeah, Sara... :( I'm glad you liked the scene even though it was awful. It broke my heart to write that bit, even though Sara hasn't been around very long and hasn't been the most likable of characters, I still felt terrible. And as for Snow, yeah her perfect world is starting to fall apart. I feel really bad. I love Snow and I'm really making things hard for her :P Sara does look pretty guilty of drugging Snow, doesn't she? But then as you say, she's very cunning so who's to say? She had the opportunity, certainly, and she did mention that she had a betrayal planned for the party so yeah... anything's possible xD
Ah, I do love theories :P Steven just sort of pops up out of nowhere in this chapter, so I can see how he'd seem pretty suspicious. You probably will end up saying that about everyone at some point xD I mean, at this point the only people we know for a fact didn't kill Sara are Kayla and Ariana because they were out of town at the time of the murder. A lot of people are going to appear guilty, both intentionally and unintentionally. So Steven... as I said, anything is possible. Everyone in town definitely has their secrets after all O.o With Michael, eh... it's probably best if I don't say anything :P I'm walking a fine line with him, so yeah... xD Hmm, I suppose I can say he could be quite a bit smarter than you think he is. Okay, that’s it. I’ll say no more.
Ariana... God, I've never cried over a fictional character the way I did when I wrote that scene. That was horrible for me :( Of all the characters I've written, she's undoubtedly my favorite and with this I've pretty much just signed her death warrant, so yeah, I was really upset. I sobbed for hours after that. I didn't want to do it, I really didn't. I almost backed out many times, but... yeah. Ariana is strong though, so she'll be able to handle it pretty well. Kayla, well... it'll be interesting to see where that goes. Both of them have grown a lot in the 13 years since ‘Warehouse’ so Kayla isn’t ever going to react as she did when Ariana was shot, but she’s still Kayla and she doesn’t handle loss well at all, so…
Haha, yep, that was it! I read that and was like; 'Yeah, you're absolutely right. Someone won't be making it out of "that night" alive' :P
November 24, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 8 Reply
Snow :’( I don’t believe she killed Sara, but it was so heart-wrenching to see her consider that. Unless she was being controlled by some supernatural thingy or something, then I could see them using Snow to kill her but she wouldn’t have been herself, so… I don’t think she would have willingly killed Sara. Unless Sara is actually an evil mastermind and revealed her evil plan to Snow while she was drugged or under supernatural stuff and then Snow was forced to kill her to save the world :P But, somehow that seems unlikely ;) I don’t really have much of an idea about who the killer is at the moment. Everyone seems suspicious!
One thing I thought, would Sophia be questioning Snow? They’re family, so… Wouldn’t there be some thing about not being able to question people you know? I know doctors aren't supposed to treat people they know, so I thought it would be the same. Although, I suppose since they’re in a small town there isn’t much choice so Sophia would have to do it.
I also thought it was strange that Michael wasn’t a suspect. It was his house so I would have thought that would automatically make him at least need to be questioned, even if there was no evidence he’d actually done it. Although, I suppose he probably was but it wasn’t shown. I feel kind of sorry for Brad xD Obviously he didn’t really do it, although I suppose he might have been involved. I mean, who’s dumb enough to kill someone using their own knife and leaving fingerprints on it? xD Besides, he seemed mysterious and stuff, so I think he has some other secret but I don’t see why he’d kill Sara.
November 27, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Haha, that's the best theory so far xD I could see Sara being a criminal mastermind, preparing to destroy the town with her Death Ray and Snow must stop her. I love it! Fun fact, my very first idea for a sequel was going to be something along those lines. The CIA (or some fictional government agency) was going to discover that Fate and Destiny existed and were going to be trying to capture them and use their powers to control everyone. Somehow, Snow would have ended up fighting against them to save the world. That, I quickly realized, probably would have been a bit too drastic of a departure from the original so… yeah, I didn't go that direction :P Still, as I say anything's possible so there very well could be an evil mastermind in town that's up to no good. It could even have been Sara. I’m glad you find everyone suspicious as well. That was the plan, after all. Everyone’s up to something around here :P
I wondered about Sophia questioning Snow as well. I did some Googling and while there’s not a specific law against it, anything Snow said would likely be inadmissible in court. But yeah I figured that since it’s a small town and there aren’t that many detectives around, Sophia was the only one there at the time to question her.
As for Michael, he was questioned off-screen (off-page?) along with everyone else at the party. He’ll actually be questioned again by Sophia in a later chapter as the investigation continues. I thought about showing his original questioning in this chapter, but since there’s no evidence pointing to him it wouldn’t have been all that interesting.
Heh, I’m happy you feel sorry for Brad :P No one ever feels sorry for Brad. I mean, we don’t even know him yet. He could be a positively wonderful human being and is simply being misjudged. Poor guy xD It would be pretty stupid of him to murder someone with his own knife and just leave it there at the scene of the crime where the police can quite easily find it… of course, there are some pretty dumb criminals out there so… xD
November 28, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 9 Reply
Ahh, the feels when Ariana was talking about Cooper… :’( :’( Aww. Still, I enjoyed that part. I hope Snow cries soon, Sara’s death obviously hasn’t really hit her yet and I think crying about something like that can be a little therapeutic in a way. I’m curious what will happen to their group without Sara, though – I think a secrets and stuff are revealed they will drift apart, even if they make friends again later. At the moment, I’m suspicious of Nikki. I bet she’s got some big secret. I’m not going to accuse her of being Sara’s killer though. Yet xD I’ll probably accuse everyone at some point, to be honest :P
The last part, with Brad… That was definitely interesting :P I wonder who he’s talking to, and what they want… Creepy. I still don’t think he killed Sara (surely he’s not that dumb to leave his knife there) but I guess he must still be up to something. Plus the way at the end of their conversation, when whoever it was accused him of being insensitive, makes me think their plan or whatever is not directly involved with Sara’s death. Surely they wouldn’t say something like that if they were, they wouldn’t care if it was insensitive or not xD Buuut I suppose it’s definitely still possible they were involved in some way. Gosh, that was longer than I intended it to be xD
Something I found strange was when Brad described Sophia as a “lovely blonde woman” when she’s about to arrest him. It seemed odd because of that, even if it’s the truth xD
December 5, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting :) Yeah, that bit about Cooper made me sad too. It's moments like these that I really miss having him around. I'm glad you liked that part though, because honestly this chapter was pure evil to write and I'm not completely happy with it, but oh well :P Snow's breakdown is coming, she's just sort of still in that denial stage where Sara's death isn't real to her yet. Crying really is therapeutic though, so it really would help her if she did. I spent a lot of time thinking about what exactly will happen to their group without Sara and to be honest, I'm still not entirely sure xD Right now I'm just going with what I feel like in the moment. As their secrets come out, the dynamic within the group could easily change which would be fun for me because I don't have a plan.
Nikki, huh? She's really easy to be suspicious of, isn't she? Out of the four girls, she's the one we know next to nothing about. She hasn't done much of anything up to this point, she's just sort of been in the background. She's definitely got a secret, I'll say that much. But then, everyone does so that's hardly a clue xD Heh, if you end up accusing everyone then I've done my job right. I want everyone to be suspicious :P It makes it much easier to hide the real killer if everyone seems like they could have done it.
Oh Brad :P I really like writing him even though I usually don't enjoy trying to write from the male perspective. He's been fun so far. You'll get answers about him soon. Of course he's up to something, but whether it's got anything to do with Sara... well, you'll have to wait and see. I mean, maybe the person he's talking to is just a really sensitive murderer or something xD But yes, he would have to be incredibly clueless to leave his own knife at the scene of the crime. Unless he knew that by leaving his knife there he could convince the police that someone had stolen his knife and that he was being set up to take the fall for someone else, thereby removing himself as a potential suspect and so left his knife intentionally. Mind = Blown, right? xD
I'm glad you pointed out that bit at the end there about Sophia. That needs to go. That's there because originally Brad was going to be a bit of a womanizer and was going to end up pursuing Sophia romantically after a while. He even whistled and made a few sexual innuendos when her saw her before O.o I changed Brad so he's not like that now and while he may eventually find himself interested in Sophia, he's no longer the time of person who's going to notice if the detective that's arresting him is lovely or not :P
December 5, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 10 Reply
Oooh that was interesting. JTG… At the moment all I’m thinking of is Pretty Little Liars xD To be fair I only ever read the first three books or something, but whoever they are they remind me of A (It was A, right? It’s been ages since I read them and I never watched the show :3). Still, they have to be someone at the school, to know that Clara was talking to Jackson at that moment. Nikki was suspicious in this chapter, but I don’t think it’s her – I don’t see how she could have sent that text to Clara without her noticing, considering they were right next to each other :P So I suspect she’s a red herring, but who really knows… xD
Anyway, I was definitely surprised about Mary and Brad :P I wonder how they know each other. Obviously they’re up to something, but I believe Brad (and by extension Mary) when he says he wasn’t involved in Sara’s murder. But they are definitely involved in something... ooooOOOhhhh! Maybe they were the ones who broke into the jewellery store! That would explain Brad’s “they don’t know anything! Keep quiet!” or whatever it was from the last chapter. I don’t know what they could have stolen from the jewellery store and what why it’s useful to them, but that’s my theory at the moment :3 Or perhaps just Brad stole the stuff (cos his dialogue seemed to imply that Mary might think he had actually killed Sara, which wouldn’t have happened if they’d been together stealing jewellery) but he stole stuff for her too. Lol, sorry for rambling xDDecember 9, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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JTG actually was heavily inspired by A. Originally I wasn't going to have any of JTG's messages signed at all because I thought it felt too much like A. The characters were just going to refer to him/her as the 'mystery texter' but typing that over and over got tiring quickly so I ended up with JTG; which could mean anything or nothing at all :P Heh, it would have been pretty tough for Nikki to send that message, although I know someone who can send lengthy texts while keeping their phone in their pocket the whole time, so Nikki could just be really skilled. Of course, she doesn't know about Clara sabotaging Jacob's bike... or does she? *cue evil laughter*
I can't say much about Mary and Brad. One of their stories is directly related to another character's story, which in turn is connected to another character's story that I'm not even hinting at yet xD So, yeah I should really keep my mouth shut :P I can also neither confirm nor deny your jewelry store theory, but I can say that the mention of the robbery wasn't just random fluff. Geez, have I been cryptic enough today? And you're not rambling, I love reading people's theories. I like to know what people are thinking and just how close to the truth they are. I've seen some theories that were dead on and others that were very far off the target, but they're all quite interesting. Especially the incorrect ones because a couple of them have fit so perfectly with the rest of the story that I almost wish I could use some of them xD
December 9, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 11 Reply
Awww Kayla :( I’m really not looking forward to Snow finding out about Ariana, my heart is already suffering too much. I think her feelings are really well portrayed and realistic. It’s heart-breaking how part of her wishes Ariana were already dead, but it seems like something someone in that situation would actually feel. I’d say I hope that some supernatural force will save Ariana again, but I doubt it :/ After all, in the last book Destiny or someone said Ariana’s life was her own now, so unless something new comes up I don’t see her getting saved. I’m gonna be so upset when she dies…
I have a feeling that Jackson’s going to find out about her and Sara before Snow can tell him :/ Things never work out the way people want, so… I’m sure he will find out that way instead of Snow telling him herself. Unless he is JTG. But I don’t think he is, because they sound like a girl. Especially the text Snow got about Sara, it sounded to me like something a girl would say, so I think they’re probably a girl. But then, maybe they are a man and are just covering it up by posing as a girl xD
I doubt Mary and Brad are actually going out. I mean when she got POV before it sounded as though no-one had ever been interested in her “in that way” or whatever :P Plus the way Brad spoke of her before it didn’t sound like she was his girlfriend. Still, they’re relationship is intriguing. I wonder how they came to know each other, and what their plan was. I still think they stole from the jewellery store, but I don’t know why on Earth they would have done it xD I guess I’ll just have to wait and find out… And if she did get a message from JTG, I wonder what it was about. Perhaps about Michael, since she didn’t want people to find out about what he’d done to her.
And that teacher. He was creepy, the way he stared at Snow. I know he stared at other people, but I’m sure he’ll be important somehow. Maybe the people he stopped at were all the other characters involved in whatever the hell is going on here xD Creepy. And I wonder why the old teacher retired… :P
There was one thing I found odd – I don’t know how American schools work but when a kid died at my high school we had an assembly about it and the kids in his year were all offered grief counselling. I thought it was odd that the school administration itself didn’t seem to have much acknowledgement of her death, as the students just went to class like normal.December 15, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :) I'm not looking forward to Snow finding out either. I already know I'm going to be very depressed for a while when I get around to writing that chapter. I'm already preparing myself for the feels :( I even get sad writing parts with Kayla and Ariana even if they aren't talking about Ariana's disease because that's always in the back of my mind. It's funny you mentioned a supernatural force rescuing Ariana because I do sort of have an out for her. I inadvertently wrote it into the end of Warehouse so the option is there if I wanted to pursue it but... I really don't know for sure what I'm going to do. It's kind of 50/50 right now. I suppose it'll depend on how much I can harden my heart once I get there. Suffice to say, Ari will be with us for a long time to come regardless.
Well, it all really depends on what JTG wants, doesn't it? I mean, he/she hasn't made any demands or anything and that could very well be the only secret JTG has about Snow. If so, and they wanted to coerce Snow in some way they wouldn't want to relinquish their only ammunition. Of course, it's always possible that JTG is actually just a psychopath that wants to hurt her, so... xD JTG is remarkably unpredictable, just let me say that. As for Jackson being JTG, I'd say he's just as likely a suspect as anyone else. There are only two people in town who are supposed to know both of the things JTG knows. And of course those people are Snow and Clara :P JTG's messages do tend to sound more like a girl than a guy, don't they? Was that intentional or was I just using the fine art of misdirection? We may never know... xD
Yeah, I still don't want to talk about Brad and Mary :P Well, I want to I just really shouldn't. I'm going to end up saying too much one day xD I shouldn't talk about the teacher either, actually. It's much too soon. Let's just say he's not the only person that will be eyeing Snow strangely O.o
While I wasn't going to have an assembly, I could have sworn I wrote a part where the girls were talking about the grief counselors that had been brought in to school. None of them wanted to go, so they skipped the sessions. In fact, I know I wrote that. I know I'm not (that) crazy :P That's going to bug me now because I specifically remember writing that. Whatever. I'm glad you pointed that out. I'll edit that bit when I get a chance :D
December 15, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Lol, perhaps you did mention grief counsellors :P It wouldn't be the first time I've missed something completely ;)
December 15, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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No, no, I didn't mention them at all :P I re-read it earlier and you didn't miss anything. I'm just losing my mind, that's all there is to it. I'm just remembering things that never happened xD I suppose it could be lack of sleep because I'm still up catching up on my reading after midnight instead of going to bed, but oh well... :P
December 15, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 12 Reply
I was happy (and yet sad :P) that it was Kayla who comforted Snow after she broke down at last about Sara instead of Ariana, which is what I would have expected. So far in this story I was kind of getting the feeling that she was getting a little neglected in her role as one of Snow’s mothers, because all of the mother/daughter scenes have pretty much been with Ariana. Especially since Kayla would really be just as much her mother as Ariana is, even if they’re not related by blood. Anyway, because of that I really liked that scene, and the things Kayla told her about her coping with Claire and Ariana’s death/near-death. I think Snow will be okay too. Eventually :(
The part with Dr Banks was interesting (and yet so creepy :P) too. I wonder why all these older dudes keep checking her out. I guess they must be connected, and I don’t think they’re really looking at her “in that way” but I’m not sure what their motive is. And this Emilia… I wonder where she’ll fit into things.
Snow’s talk with Jacob was touching too. I wonder what role he will have in the story. I hope he’s a good guy, cos I like him xD It was interesting what he said about Sara, and how Snow thought it made Sara sound worse than she thought she was. I think Sara was worse than Snow thinks, because she was manipulating her too (when she told her she didn’t care if she picked Jackson), but she wasn’t a bad person overall as far as I know, and as Jacob said she did love Snow.
I liked seeing Sara’s Mum and stepdad. I like how you pointed out the contrast between Sara and Michelle, and how her stepdad wasn’t what Snow expected. But because of that I’m wondering if his niceness in this chapter was an act or something. I’m not sure because it’s not like it’s uncommon for kids to hate their stepdads, so Sara could have just called him a pompous douchebag even if he wasn’t actually one. Although, it did seem kind of suspicious that he would ask Snow to take some of Sara’s stuff. I mean, she’s only been dead for a couple of days, most people would know to wait a little longer O.o
December 19, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting!! You make a good point about Kayla seeming neglected up to this point. It wasn't intentional, it just sort of happened that way. But I always knew I wanted Kayla to be the one to comfort Snow about Sara because its just not something Kayla is really expected to do. As you said, you thought Ariana would be the one to do that and usually she would be. I was glad I got to give Kayla a scene like that for once. Of course, it's likely not to be the only time Kayla is in that situation. When Snow finds out about Ariana, I imagine Kayla will have to do it again. Anyway, I'm glad you liked that scene :)
There are a lot of creepy older men checking Snow out, aren't there? It's probably bad news, whatever it is :P As for Emilia... well, she'll factor in in a way that I'm hoping nobody expects. I don't want to give anything away because I really hope no one sees it coming xD Jacob's role at the moment still isn't fully fleshed out. While he could always potentially be JTG, other than that I don't have big plans for him yet. I say yet because he's a character that I created because I needed bodies :P I've got a lot of storyline ideas that I'm not sure when and how they'll be introduced so Jacob will very likely fall into one of those. Is he good? Is he bad? Even I don't know right now xD I'm leaning towards good, but this is Mistbrook Falls so who knows :P
That scene with Snow and Jacob and her thoughts about Sara seeming worse than she remembered her is the very beginning of something that will likely take the entire story to fully explore. Snow will slowly start to learn more and more about Sara's real personality, a journey which I hope will be interesting. I really glad you liked the contrast between Sara and Michelle. It's been established that Sara didn't get along with her mother, but we never got into why. Well, that's one of the reasons why :P They're drastically different, but very similar in some ways as well. Michelle knows how to get what she wants just like Sara did, she's just more likely to use brute force than manipulation.
With Sara's stepdad, Sara just didn't like him because she really loved her dad and so when this new guy showed up in her life, she didn't want anything to do with him and, being Sara, didn't want her friends to like him either. So she convinced her friends that he was a jerk even though he doesn't seem to be. Of course, that doesn't mean he's not actually a jerk and is just hiding it well at the moment xD He's also the type of person that, when he sees a problem, he just rushes straight at it and does what he thinks is best to fix it. He thinks Michelle isn't grieving her daughter's death appropriately, so he decides to tear down the so-called shrine as quickly as he can. He really should have at least waited until after Sara's funeral to do it though. At this point, Sara hasn't even been dead 48 hours.
December 19, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 13 Reply
I’m glad the subject of Adrian came up at last. I mean, I know it’s not something they probably mention a lot but I must admit I was curious about Snow’s opinion on it. I felt really bad for her when she was wondering if Ariana saw Adrian when she looked at her :( I can’t say I know what it’s like to be in her position, but it seemed realistic to me that she would wonder that. And it was heart-warming when Ariana corrected her too. Noooo, I don't want her to die :( I'm absolutely dreading when she has to tell Snow about that. I suspect many tissues will be required for that chapter xD
Snow’s dream was interesting too – I wonder if it has something to do with that murderer that was mentioned a while back. I hope Snow doesn’t get caught by him (if he’s still around) :( Or anyone else, for that matter.
And Sara… :( I can’t say I was expecting her to come back, even if she’s only a ghost. I wonder if she’s a guide, like Cooper and Claire. I wonder if they’ll come back at some point, actually :P They must still be around too, somewhere. Anyway, her warning about Michael was chilling. I don’t think he killed Sara (although I think he could have been involved), but he’s still creepy and surely up to something bad.
December 22, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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I'd been trying to find a place to mention Adrian for a while. I even considered editing it in an earlier chapter, but as you say it's not something they talk about very much so it always seemed out of place. I was happy to finally find a spot to fit that in. I'm glad you found Snow's thoughts on the situation realistic. It seemed realistic to me, but I've never been in her place so what do I know? Heh, it's chapters like these that I'm glad I went against my original plan and revealed that Ariana was dying instead of keeping it a secret. It hovers in the background of every scene she's in in a way I didn't expect. And I've already got my tissues ready so when I get around to writing Ariana telling Snow I can actually get through it :P
Assuming Snow's dream really was related to that murderer, I'll agree with you that I hope Snow doesn't get caught by him. That would be an extremely bad day for her xD That guy doesn't seem very nice :P I wasn't sure Sara would be coming back either. There’s a reason, I just can’t talk about it for a long while. Yeah, just like everything else :P I just started thinking that there's still so much about Sara that we don't know and it would be much more interesting if she could still appear from time to time. Is she a guide, a ghost, something else entirely? We'll get into that later :P
I'm pretty confident that Cooper and Claire will reappear at some point. Since Ariana is dealing with her own mortality, talking to people who have already died would be pretty useful. And Cooper did promise to come running whenever she called, so… :P And as for Michael and what he’s up to, well the next chapter will either give you a tiny bit of clarity about him (and a few other things) or just make everything that much more confusing xD I’ve heard both from different people, so… yeah. Anyways, thanks for commenting :D
December 22, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 14 Reply
Wow, there were a lot of unexpected surprises in this chapter. Firstly, I didn’t expect Brad and Michael to be working together O.o Damn, that changes things. I believe Michael when he says he didn’t kill Sara, but I still don’t like him xD He spoke too casually about her death. I mean, he could show a little remorse over the death of a sixteen year old girl, even if she was out to prove he was evil or whatever.
It’s interesting about Mary too. She didn’t want Ariana’s gift of jewellery, which makes me think she’s feeling guilty about stealing from the jewellery store… At least, that’s my theory xD I wonder what the problem she wanted Brad to help her with is. I’m also really wondering what was going on back in chapter three or whatever number it was. Michael didn’t seem that interested in Mary, talking as though she were a hindrance, which seems weird. Now I think about it I don’t think (I could be wrong, I’m going by my fuzzy memory here) that Sara actually saw him raping her, she just saw him approach and assumed that’s what happened. Although I have no idea what else could have happened, seeing as she was naked and cried. Maybe it did happen and he’s just trying to hide it from Brad, because I assume he’d probably get pretty mad if he found out. But I don’t know. I’m confused now xD
Anyway, the second part of the chapter was even more surprising than the first. I must say, I never expected that Jackson would have cheated on her too, on the same night. I feel bad, but I find that kind of funny :P And with Emilia, that doctor’s daughter… Well, that’s going to but a hindrance on Snow’s promise to talk to her. Anyway, overall I thought that scene was well-written. I'm not really sure what will happen next between them. Before I thought Jackson might break up with Snow when she told him about Sara, but since it turns out he cheated on her too I don't know what to expect. Especially with JTG thrown into the mix O.o
I’m also glad that the bookstore was mentioned again. I had assumed that they had sold it and Ariana was a housewife or something, but I’m really glad to hear that she still owns it and keeps it going :) I don’t know why, that just made me feel warm and fuzzy.
December 29, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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Heh, I didn't even expect Brad and Michael to be working together :P I'd planned on them being enemies at first, but I like them better as allies. Maybe frienemies is the better word as they don't always get along so well. And yeah, it changes things too xD Michael isn't the type of guy who feels much remorse for anyone really. He doesn't have time for remorse or feelings at all for the most part, as he's obviously a busy man :P
Nearly all of the pieces to the Mary puzzle are already out there, they just aren't arranged in the proper order xD Your theory is close, not quite on target just yet, but getting warmer. The problem she had is also linked to whatever she and Brad did the night Sara was murdered. That's the only clue I'm giving xD One thing I should clear up because it will be important later is that Michael did in fact rape Mary and Sara did catch him in the act. She also has the video she took on her phone to prove it. Rereading that chapter (you're right, it was three) I see that it's not explicitly said that she caught him raping her and it really should be. I'll have to edit that because it's pretty important :P You're right about Brad though, he definitely doesn't know about that. Michael wants to keep that secret all to himself.
I'm glad you didn't expect Jackson to have cheated on Snow, especially with Emilia. I have no idea why I don't want anyone to see that coming, I just don't :P It will definitely make it hard for Snow to keep her promise, but she's Ariana's daughter, so yeah xD Snow and Jackson's relationship will be strained, for sure. I'm not completely sure myself what will happen with them yet. I could see them breaking up, but for the moment they're going to try and repair their relationship and I'll likely end up doing with them what feels right as times goes on.
I actually thought I mentioned the bookstore before this, but when I noticed I hadn't I knew I needed to reference it because it's still around. She's changed the name, though. It's now called Coop's Books and Cupcakes. Ariana sells cupcakes there too :P I'm glad hearing about it made you feel warm and fuzzy :)
December 29, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 15 Reply
I liked seeing the warehouse again xD I’ve missed that place… Since they’ve made it their hideout, I’m happy as I’ll probably get to see it more in the future :P
Anyway, this chapter was interesting. It’s good that the three of them have shared their secrets and are going to work together. It makes me curious if there’s anyone else JTG is bothering though. Mary’s likely, but Nikki and Steven… I’m not sure, cos I don’t know much about them :P For all I know, one of them could be JTG. I’m really looking forward to meeting Emilia too. I feel like she’s going to be very important beyond being the girl Jackson slept with.
I feel really sorry for Snow now she’s beginning to see that Sara wasn’t the same as she remembers. I can’t imagine what that feels like, especially since she’s having to deal with the pain of her death too :( I liked how Clara had a more realistic view of Sara in contrast. Sara was a good friend but still, she was manipulative. I really liked their interaction (Clara and Snow) especially when Snow told Clara about how she blacked out. I agree with Clara, I don’t think Snow would have killed Sara, no matter what. Unless she was possessed or something :P
Although, I did feel like Snow was being a bit insensitive to Jackson’s anger over Clara’s mistake. I mean, it might have been an accident but his friend is paralysed, and even if he regains some movement in his legs it’s unlikely he’ll be able to walk, at least not like he used to. I thought his anger was justified, though not very helpful as Snow said, but she didn’t have to yell at him. But, since she was angry at him anyway for sleeping with Emilia I think her yelling at him was an understandable thing for her to do. And she did apologize later so I won’t hold it against her :P
I’ll probably try to get to Under the Milky Way by the end of the week. I have to reread the first two chapters first xD
December 29, 2014 | Genevieve Middleton
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I've been wanting to go back to the warehouse for ages, I just haven't had a reason to up till now. I really miss it though :( To me it became a character in and of itself and things don't feel the same without it around. If I hadn't just needed to make the move to Mistbrook Falls, they'd all still be living there. The warehouse will make plenty more appearances though, I promise.
It's a safe bet to assume that JTG is bothering other people and not just the three of them. I don't completely know for sure how many myself. I think I know, but that could always change. Yeah, I intentionally left Mary, Nikki, and Steven out of the spotlight so they're kind of unknown quantities. I knew Snow and Clara's secrets were never going to be kept a secret from readers and Jackson's wasn't for very long, so their secrets can stay just that for a while; secret. Any one of them could be JTG as you said, so keeping them somewhat mysterious helps with that feeling of uncertainty a bit. Emilia's got a role to play, no doubt. I'm just not saying what it is xD
Yeah, Snow is slowly starting to realize that the Sara she knew wasn't necessarily the real Sara. The truth about Sara is going to be really hard for her to believe and right now, she still doesn't believe it. Well, she doesn't want to believe it. She wants to remember Sara the way she knew her, not as the person Clara and Jacob are telling her she was. I'm glad you liked their contrasting views on Sara. Clara's viewpoint is definitely the more realistic one of the two. I'm glad you liked Snow and Clara's interactions and Clara's opinions on Snow's blackout. Their friendship honestly is deeper than Snow and Sara's was. It's much more pure, I should say. Even though Clara changed pretty much everything about herself to fit in, she's not just Snow's friend because of her status. They really do care about each other and writing the two of them can be really fun sometimes xD
Jackson's anger is completely justified and Snow really shouldn't have yelled at him. He has every right to be angry with Clara, helpful or not. This is really the first time Snow's starting to show signs that she can't handle everything that's happening. She's just lost Sara and suddenly she's faced with the losing Clara too, not to mention JTG and Jackson cheating on her, and she just snaps. It won't be the last time either. Still, I'm glad you won't hold it against her :P
Lol, I need to go back and edit the first two chapters (and a good number of the others) because there's many things that need fixing in that story. Every time I think about doing it, this story beckons me and I never get around to it xD
December 29, 2014 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 16 Reply
Lol, the title… Now I’ve got Miss Atomic Bomb by The Killers stuck in my head. I don’t mind, because it’s my favourite song ever :3 I don’t know if that’s what it was a reference to, but that line is in that song so that’s what I’m thinking of.
It’s interesting that Sara appeared before Clara too. It makes me wonder who else she visited that night. Anyway, the whole funeral was very heart-wrenching. I’ve never been to one, so I don’t know if it was realistic, but it seemed like it was to me. I felt really bad for Snow, but I hope that it will help her to begin to move on now that Sara’s been buried. The scene with them looking at her dead body creeped me out a little though O.o Not that you should change it or anything, I just always feel that way about burials. Personally I think cremation is a better option, less creepy. Lol, sorry for rambling.
I’m curious about Nikki’s secret. At the moment, I see two options: either she had a baby, although I don’t see how that could have happened without her parents noticing xD Unless she was away for a long time, or something, which is totally possible, so it’s still a viable option. The second option is that she had a girlfriend, and her devout parents are super conservative and don’t approve. Those are my guesses, anyway xD I’m not sure what else it could be. Anyway, it was interesting to learn more about her, and about Clara’s mum. I found that part strangely heart-warming, when she said she wouldn’t trade her mum for anyone.
As for Mary, I must admit I was surprised that she stole from the store because she lost Ariana’s earrings. I was imagining something far more obscure lol, and I can’t believe I didn’t pick up on that :P. Still, I don’t think Zoe believed Mary, despite her thinking she did. I wouldn’t have, if I were her xD I’m certain she’s not out of the woods about it yet. She gave them back, which was the right thing to do, but it’s definitely not over.
Now the only one of the group who’s not with them is Steven. I don’t think he’s JTG, but I think they’ll suspect him next :3 The ending was creepy. I honestly have no idea who JTG could be at the moment. Is she (I’m just gonna call her a she for now, because as Mary said she does sound like a woman even though that could be a front) someone who’s already been introduced, or someone new? Lol, I guess I’ll just have to wait to find out :P
January 9, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Oooh, Miss Atomic Bomb. I love that song. I'm going to have to play it now xD But actually I was thinking of Anna Kendrick's 'When I'm Gone' when I picked the title. I was going to go with something a bit more funeral related for the title, but I like that song so... yeah :P
Sara seems to have really gotten around that night, didn't she? It'd be safe to say she at least visited the four girls, or will if she hasn't already gone to see Mary and Nikki. As for anyone else, well it's always possible :P I'm glad (and it sounds really weird to say that) that you found the funeral scene emotional. I've been to a few funerals and I'm always creeped out by them, which is one reason I skipped the actual ceremony itself. Burying Sara was definitely a good first step to help Snow move on, but as long as her killer is still running free she won't be able to find any real peace with it. Lol, the bit with Sara's body was somewhat important, but yeah I agree that's pretty creepy xD That's the main thing I don't like about funerals...
Those are good guesses about Nikki's secret. I'm not sure exactly when I'll reveal it yet. Mary knows and now that all five of them know they can trust each other (Or can they? Muahahahahaha... ahem) it would be odd for her to keep it a secret from the rest of them, but I do love my secrets so... eh. Anyway, I'm glad you liked learning more about her and Clara's mom. None of the other girl's families have appeared yet and this was a good opportunity to start to introduce them. It also gives me many new characters to play with and any one of them could be JTG or Sara's killer... or both :P
Don't feel too bad about not figuring out that Mary stole because she lost Ari's earrings. So far, I don't think anyone has. I even told my sister that Mary's secret was really obvious, but she still didn't see it. I think people kind of forget that Mary borrowed the earrings anyway since it was so brief and wasn't mentioned again since then, so yeah. But that's her big secret. I can't say I would have believed her either, but even if Zoe did JTG still knows so you're right. It's not over for her just yet xD
You know, I almost didn't reveal that Mary and Nikki were both getting messages in this chapter. Snow, Clara, and Jackson were going to spend a while being suspicious of them and naturally they were going to be acting really suspicious as well, but I liked the idea of establishing a core group of people that are trustworthy and having them work together. That and this story is getting to be pretty long already. I'm just getting started and I'm already up to chapter 16 and am seriously considering cutting the story in half and end up with a trilogy of sorts. But either way, that would have sort of been a pointless storyline since it would have ended the same way anyway, so yeah :P
Steven though, he'll definitely be one that at least some of the group are suspicious of. Lol, the characters are gonna call JTG her too now because trying to be gender-neutral is extremely annoying whenever I have to refer to JTG :P Hmm... technically I could say whether JTG is a character that's already been introduced or not, but to me it would just be a massive spoiler though and remove a lot of suspicion from any new characters that come in later on. I will say that by the time we get to JTG's reveal, the person will be a known character. It won't be someone brand new that we haven't met that is introduced at the same time you learn that they're JTG... if that made any sense xD Anyway, I've gone on way longer than I'd intended to. Sorry about that. Thanks for the comment! :)
January 10, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 17 Reply
So, Brad is Mary’s cousin. Yep, I definitely wasn’t expecting that :P It makes sense though. I wonder what he wanted from the jewellery store though. I really have no idea what it could be xD Still, I feel really sorry for Mary. I don’t think Ariana would have cared at all if she lost them (especially since Mary feels so bad about it) but I’d imagine she probably would care if she found out about her stealing new ones.
Sorry Clara, I don’t think blocking JTG’s number is going to work at all. At best she’ll just get a new number, at worst, she’ll get angry and then who knows what she’ll do :/ I don’t think JTG is Sara’s killer. I think they might be working together, but I doubt they’re the same person. I wonder, though, if Sara did a get any messages before she died. I think that could definitely be a possibility.
And Cooper! Aaahh, that part of the chapter was probably my favourite. I’ve missed him <3 I hope he shows up a lot in the future. I felt really sorry for Ariana in this chapter but I think having Cooper back occasionally will definitely help her. Especially since I don’t think she’ll ever really get to talk through her own feelings on her impending death with Kayla or Snow, so having another person there to vent to will be helpful. Especially since Cooper knows what it’s like to die, although his death was far more sudden and unexpected than Ariana’s will be.
I found it kind of sad when Cooper said that Alana never dates anyone. I know they’re going to meet gain in the afterlife or whatevs, but that still depresses me a bit :( I don’t know, I’ve always felt that it’s important to move on after loss, even if it takes a long time. Sorry for rambling.
There was one thing I found a bit odd. If Brad is Mary’s dad’s brother’s son, why don’t they have the same last name? I can’t quite remember Mary’s last name, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t Reynolds. Unless Brad (or Mary, but Brad’s more likely) took his mother’s name?
January 26, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment! Yeah, I'll be pretty surprised if anyone figures out that Brad is Mary's cousin. There's no hints or clues about it or anything, so yeah :P I've got to say, you notice so many minute details xD I didn't think anyone would pay any attention at all to Brad and Mary's last name being different. But you're right, he took his mother's last name because... reasons :P It's explained later once Brad becomes a more prominent character. It's nothing huge or story-changing, just a bit of his background. Still, I'm going to have to watch myself and what hints and clues I slip in. You're paying attention xD As for what Brad stole from the store, well that's an interesting story. I'm just not going to be telling it for a while :P I've recently decided to split the story into two parts so it's very possible we won't get into that until the next one. I'm not sure yet if I'll go that deep into what Brad's up to or not before I get to the cut off point.
Yeah, Clara's plan probably isn't the best. It couldn't be that easy to get rid of JTG, right? Like Snow said, they're playing a game and as far as JTG is concerned Clara just decided she wasn't going to play anymore. That won't sit well with JTG. I will say though that JTG doesn't really get mad, she gets even :P Oooh, I'd been meaning to ask if you thought JTG killed Sara or not. I'm always interested to get people's thoughts on that. There's sort of a range of different ideas so it's always fun to read them. I'm trying to avoid similarities with Pretty Little Liars wherever I can and Alison received messages from A before she died, but it would be interesting if Sara was fighting with JTG before she was killed, so... yeah :P
Lol, someone on fictionpress got upset with me for bringing Cooper back without any warning xD I believe the feels were a bit too strong, which I admit is perfectly fair. I miss Coop myself xD He will make more regularly scheduled appearances from now on and we might see one or two more old friends from time to time as well. With Alana, I actually agree that it's important to move on in a situation like hers. It's just in this case, and I have to be really careful with what I say here lest I say too much, Alana knows things that very few other people know. Cooper let her in on things that he wasn't supposed to, but given that she knows these things she now knows what's really important. It's kind of meaning of life stuff and what life really is. The only hint I can give you to clear some of that up is what Cooper said. Death isn't the end, it's the beginning of everything.
January 26, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 18 Reply
Snow's thoughts at the beginning about JTG were very intriguing. I must say, I hadn’t considered she could be more than one person. It’s a possibility, and could make sense if the three separate letters referred to their names, but at the moment I’m more inclined to believe it’s only one person, at least until there’s more evidence xD
I was right about Nikki! Well, sort of ;) I thought something like her having a baby was one of the only options. But I would never have guessed she’d had an abortion though, so that was a good surprise. I felt so bad for her :( I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for her to do that when she obviously didn’t want to.
Anyway, I can’t say I agree with Snow when she says Nikki’s parents would never disown her. I suppose it’s difficult for her to see, since her parents are totally loving and would never even think of disowning her, but I think in reality some parents would definitely do it if the situation arose. I don’t know much about Nikki’s parents, but if she says they would disown her I’ll believe it’s a possibility. Poor girl :( I hope I’m wrong.
The ending scene was pretty depressing as well. I did expect Jackson and Snow to break up – I didn’t really think they’d be able to get past just Snow cheating, so when it turned out Jackson had cheated too that just convinced me even more :( It’s sad, but I think it’s for the best, at least for now. I think you did a really good job of portraying their haste and desire to feel alive again, especially Snow. I wanna give her a hug :( I’m not sure if sleeping together will be good in the long run for them, though. It might make things super awkward for them when they have to work together to find JTG (well, if I were them I’d feel super awkward, but they’re not me xD).
On a side note, I hope we find out more about Emilia and the strange men staring at Snow soon xD I just remembered about those and I’m really curious :3
February 5, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting :) I never figured anyone would think JTG was more than one person so I tossed that in there just to get people thinking :P It's another path of speculation to send readers down while I'm over here busy trying to keep my secrets xD That's not to say that JTG isn't more than one person, she very easily could be. After all, the best lies contain a hint of truth and the best place to hide something is often in plain sight. I'm being cryptic again, aren't I :P
You were definitely on the right track about Nikki. At one point you would have been completely right because she was going to have gone ahead and had the baby, but then she would have given it up for adoption. But since I could come up with no logical way for her to hide all that from her parents, she ended up having an abortion instead. I'm glad you felt for her because it's definitely something she's still dealing with. Even if she wasn't afraid of her parents, she's still struggling with her decision.
It's moments like these that I really wish I had gone ahead and introduced all of the group's parents at the beginning. I thought about it, but I felt like it would have been character overload to bring in so many people so early on. None of them would have had anything to do anyway, but it would have been nice to let people know a bit more about them than what you can glean from a few sentences about them from other characters. But you're right about Nikki's parents and Snow's view on them. Snow comes from a family that would support her no matter what she did. Nikki doesn't. But then, Nikki is terrified and she isn't thinking completely rationally so she could just be overreacting. And of course, anyone can change their ways so her parents could always come to see their daughter's side of things as well. To be honest, it's another of those things that I haven't completely decided what will happen. I don't even know for sure if her parents will even find out. Sometimes my own lack of preparation scares me xD
I wasn't really sure whether Jackson and Snow would break up or not. I'd planned on them staying together at least a while longer and trying to fix things, but it felt like they were beyond that. Something is obviously very wrong in their relationship, so I agree that it's the best thing for them. I worry about that scene with them so I'm glad you think it's okay. I don't know why, it just makes me nervous :P Them sleeping together probably wasn't the best idea. It would make me uncomfortable too :P But given their situation and the small few they can trust, they'll have to figure out how to work together regardless.
We'll be meeting Emilia very very soon, once the gang goes back to school. This has been an oddly long weekend, hasn't it? And it's only Sunday morning :P With the strange men staring at Snow, it will be a while before you get any solid answers, but there will be hints here and there most definitely.
February 6, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 19 Reply
I must admit when Snow said they were on a break the first thing I thought of was Friends :P I hope their relationship isn’t like Ross and Rachel’s, I get incredibly frustrated with all that back and forth stuff xD But I doubt it will be, and I think it’s a good idea for them. I’m really not sure what to expect. I could see them going either way, either breaking up for good or getting back together in the long run, so I’m curious to see what happens in the future. Although, I’m sure when Emilia gets introduced things will just get even more complicated xD I really hope that’s soon, I’m so curious :3
I was kind of confused when Clara said she wasn’t close to Sara, but then she said she loved her in the next sentence. I mean, personally I wouldn’t say I loved all my friends, only the ones I’m close to, so it seemed a bit weird to me. But I’m probably just an unsentimental person xD
Oh Clara, I knew it wouldn’t be that easy :/ JTG’s not going to give up that easily, you should know that. Still, it’s scary. I hope Noel gets to keep her job. Hopefully she will, since it’ll be hard for JTG to actually back up the sexual harassment claim without revealing who she is. But then who knows what tricks JTG has up her sleeve? Anyway, this definitely raises the stakes. She’s not afraid to fight dirty, that’s for sure. Putting that note on Clara’s bedside table was really creepy O.o I wonder how she got in… Anyway, overall this was a very interesting chapter. I’m really anxious to see what happens next.
February 13, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Haha, well that's pretty fitting then since I was thinking of Friends when I was writing that bit :P There was a joke about it in there but I cut it at the very last second. Jackson was going to say something to the effect of wanting to make sure they both understood what being on a break was because he didn't want to hook up with another girl and end up spending the next ten years arguing about whether or not they were, in fact, on a break xD Anyway, they won't be like Ross and Rachel at all. That annoyed me too so there's definitely not going to be any of that going on. I'm still not sure yet where they'll end up exactly. They're pretty much broken up at this point, but I could see them eventually getting back together. Emilia will be making her first appearance very soon. At first she was going to be in this chapter, but I liked ending it where I did so she got left out xD Soon though, I promise :P
There's a reason why Clara said she and Sara weren't close. They were close once, but at the time of her death they really weren't. So, she still loved Sara because at one point their friendship had been really strong but then certain things took place that I can't talk about and changed their relationship. Still, you make a really good point. Clara should have said that she wasn't as close to Sara as Snow was, which would make more sense in the context of the scene since that other stuff was only vaguely alluded to ages ago and Noel doesn't know about it either, so yeah :P I need to look at rewording that part :)
Hehe, no JTG would never give up like that. Clara's plan was doomed from the start. She never thought JTG would go after her mom like that, which was kind of a low blow but that's who JTG is. Like you said, she fights dirty. I wouldn't underestimate her either :P If JTG starts something, she's got a plan. Noel may not lose her job, but she should be very worried *cue evil laughter* xD Heh, I've been wanting to add some variety to the methods JTG uses to send her messages, hence the creepy note. It's kind of fun coming up with different ways for JTG to send messages without texting. As for how JTG got in, well she's clearly good at breaking and entering without leaving behind any evidence. Unless, Noel is JTG O.o Anyway, thanks so much for commenting :D
February 13, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 20 Reply
So much mystery… :3
I must say, Emilia wasn’t what I expected. She curtsied and everything xD Anyway, I never thought she’d be so nervous, and I feel bad for saying this but one does have to wonder how she and Jackson ended up sleeping together. I mean, Emilia just doesn’t seem like she has the confidence to flirt and sleep with a popular guy like Jackson (who was dating Snow, her idol, no less) after only one night. Unless Jackson was the one initiate everything, which is totally possible, in which case it could make sense the way it is because she might’ve had a crush on him or just been super flattered he paid attention to her, but… I don’t know. I think there’s something she’s hiding, although I’m not sure what. Like maybe she’s more confident than she lets on, and she’s putting it on so Snow doesn’t get mad. I don’t know. I feel kind of bad for saying that, what if she really is just nervous? xD I’m really curious to see what happens next, anyway.
Michael… Hmm, I don’t quite know what to make of him. I feel sorry for him about his sister (if he’s telling the truth) but still, he’s creepy >.< I hope Snow sticks to Sara’s warning, no matter how nice he was acting in this chapter.
I’m worried about Kayla and Ariana now :( After what happened to Clara’s mum, and since something happened to their car… >.< I hope JTG isn’t planning something awful. Who am I kidding? Of course she is :P Anyway, I guess I was right about Snow suspecting Steven. I don’t think it’s him though. JTG would be more stealthly, surely xD Ooooh, maybe she was stalking Snow at the time and noticed Steven take out his phone and text her at that exact moment to mess with her.
This is kind of silly, but here’s my crack theory: I’ve noticed that a lot of people in this story seem to have green eyes. Sara (and her mum), Jackson, Clara… and possibly others that I’ve forgotten xD Plus Nikki has hazel, which sort of counts. I noticed that a while ago but this chapter made me realise it again since Emilia also had green eyes. I hope I don’t sound horribly racist when I say this but I don’t know any black people with green eyes. Even if she’s mixed race it seems more likely that she’d have brown or something since darker colours are dominant. Green isn’t that common of an eye colour too, at least not compared to brown and blue. I wonder if there’s some reason for the green-eyed-ness or whether it’s just a coincidence. Lol, you probably think I’m a complete idiot… xD
One thing I thought was strange that Snow found it odd she didn’t want to date anyone. To me that makes perfect sense – the girl she loved died a week ago, and she broke up with her boyfriend over the weekend. I don’t think anyone would want to date in that situation :P I guess it seems odd to me that she thought it was odd. Also, I might not be remembering this right, but I thought Mr Winston taught history. Am I just forgetful? xD And lol, at first I was confused why Snow was selecting her outfit for school, but then I remembered that most American schools don’t have uniforms, while here everyone does. At least, that's the impression I get from TV :P
February 26, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :D I think it’s perfectly fair to question Emilia’s behavior. It’s good and I’m glad you are because like I’ve said before I don’t want anyone to not be at least a little bit suspicious from time to time. Most of the characters, even the ones we think we can trust finally, have a secret or two that they (and JTG) aren’t talking about yet. So with Emilia I can’t blame anyone for being suspicious of her. You’ll get a better idea of what happened between Emilia and Jackson in the next chapter… assuming she’s telling the truth :P
Poor Michael. No one trusts him. He’s just a sad, misunderstood guy that needs love :P Yeah, you’re not buying that, are you? xD Michael is definitely creepy, but there’s not much known about him yet. He’s not just an evil rapist douchebag, there’s some humanity in him too; which was of course the point of the story about his sister. Snow probably should heed Sara’s warning, but… where would the fun be in that? :P
Lol, you should be worried about Kayla and Ariana. You should be worried about everyone really :P JTG’s always up to something, right? And while whatever JTG is up to might not necessarily involve their car (I mainly used that as a quick and easy way to mention that they still had it in the event that I ever had the need to use it) it’s definitely a hint that JTG might be lurking about the other’s houses as well, not just Clara’s. You were right about Snow suspecting Steven. He’s a really good suspect too because he hasn’t been featured much and he’s close to all of JTG’s targets so far, so he’s in a good position steal their secrets. You would think JTG would be more sneaky than that, but as they say the best place to hide something is often in plain sight, so yeah… :P Lol, that would absolutely be something JTG would do xD She knows Snow is the most likely of the bunch to figure out who she is, so sending her down a false trail would be a good idea.
You say that’s a crack theory, but at one point you would have been on to something. I can’t say much because parts of it are still in there but a number of characters that are linked together because of *something* were all going to have the exact same eye color. The reason why would a spoiler, but yeah I was going to see how many people figured it out before hand based on the descriptions of the characters xD Now though, there’s not real reason why so many characters have green eyes other than I love green eyes xD So green ends up being popular even though it’s not all that common. Honestly, I only know a single black person with green eyes myself. She was the inspiration for Emilia appearance-wise, not her behavior :P
You make an excellent point about Snow finding that she doesn’t want to date odd. I’ll take a look at that. She should probably just state it as fact, not that she thinks its odd that she doesn’t want to or something to that effect. Thanks for bringing that up :) Lol, no you’re remembering perfectly. Mr. Winston did teach history. Well, he did because of my own mistakes :P He was always supposed to be an English teacher, but for some reason I made him teach history when he first appeared. I only noticed it a couple of days ago when I went back to double check something and saw I’d written him as an English teacher. Ah well, the benefits of the Edit button xD Eh, some schools do, some don’t. Being a school in a small town, I figured Mistbrook High wouldn’t have a strict uniform or anything. They have certain restrictions unlike the school in Pretty Little Liars where the girls go to school dressed like they’re going out to the club on a Friday night :P But then that’s really neither here nor there xD
February 26, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 21 Reply
Heheh, I must admit you scared me for a moment at the beginning :P I was convinced JTG was after Ariana… Anyway, it was nice to see her and Kayla again. Their conversation made me really sad though :( It must be so horrible for Ariana (and Kayla too, but I’m focusing on her at the moment), knowing she’s going to leave her wife and daughter alone. It’s too sad for me to deal with…. :'( :'( Although, this chapter did make me curious about what Kayla and Ariana will do if/when they find out about this JTG business.
I still don’t think Steven is JTG, but I’m looking forward to Snow confronting him (and I hope she's the one to do it, or is at least there if Jackson does it) because I’m curious to see what he’s hiding. I mean, everyone else has secrets, surely he has some too :P As for Emilia, I’m not sure what to make of her. I mean, her story about Jackson did seem convincing, but the way she talked about Sara, and how she deserved it… I know it was a foot in mouth moment, but still. I don’t think she killed Sara (but, that’s mainly because I’m too nervous to point the finger at someone in case I’m wrong :P) but I’m suspicious of her and her dad, since it’s weird how he apparently wanted her home so quickly and he was staring at Snow creepily before. I don’t know, it just seemed like something was going on there. Also she was late. I have a thing against lateness xD And Rick too, he’s a bit creepy in some ways. Everyone’s too suspicious! I don’t know who I should trust lol. Anyway, I’m looking forward to seeing what they’ll find in Sara’s room.
And didn’t Michael say in the last chapter that Brad didn’t like beer? But in this chapter he was drinking it (and apparently, enjoying it)…. Ooooh, I’m really scared for Snow now. I bet that was some ploy he used to talk to her, since she often hangs out at that barista place…. And then he seized the opportunity to show his inner squishy side and gain her trust…. That cunning weasel. Snow, stay safe :(
Lol, Game of Scones xD That would be an interesting TV show. When you play the Game of Scones, you either cook the perfect scone or it burns. There is no middle ground. And do cafes in America really give free biscuits??? I’m so jealous :P
March 5, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment! Hehehe, well that's what I was aiming for :P Every time I bring Kayla and Ariana back I swear I'm not going to talk about what's happening with Ari, but I always end up doing it. I feel really bad whenever I write about them, but I plan on bringing them in much more often despite how miserable I feel when I do. Well, if they ever do find out about JTG I would guess that Kayla would go on the warpath and try to hunt JTG down. Ariana, I'm not completely sure what she'd do. She would be disappointed that Snow didn't trust them enough to tell them what was going on, but I think she would leave JTG to the police. She's always non-violent :P
Of course Steven has secrets xD There's not a character in town without at least one after all. Whether or not Snow will be able to get him to confess any of them, well that's another story altogether :P Lol, never be nervous to point the finger at anyone. I love reading people's theories, right or wrong. Some incorrect ones I've read are so good I almost wish I could use them. As for Emilia, eh... what can I say? She's definitely mysterious and she does have a reason to hate Sara. Haha, I'm with you on lateness xD But that doesn't mean she was up to anything bad... or does it? Muahahahaha *coughs* :P Lol, you shouldn't trust anyone. Seriously, no one. In fact, that should be the motto on the welcome sign outside of town. "Welcome to Mistbrook Falls. Population: 4823. 'Trust No One'" xD
Ah, so Michael's been caught in a lie. Good eye, I wasn't sure anyone would notice that. Hehe, 'that cunning weasel' xD I love it. Michael is awfully cunning. It would be interesting if Snow ever saw Brad drinking beer :P Lol, I saw Game of Scones on a sign once and knew I had to use it at some point. Since almost all the stores and streets in Mistbrook Falls are references to something, it was the perfect time. It was going to be Game of Thorns instead and be a flower shop, but I liked Scones better. I would totally watch that show xD That's awesome. Not sure how we'd work in the tragic and violent deaths, but it would make an excellent cooking competition. Honestly, the cookie thing was a plot point simply to make the Game of Scones joke :P But some places do have things like free peanuts and there's this Mexican place that has free chips and dip so I'm sure somewhere there's a place that has free cookies. I want to find it now :P
March 5, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 22 Reply
Awww, Snow :( I felt so sorry for her when they were going through Sara’s things. I wonder if they’ll find anything on her laptop… I’m sure there must be something on there. And Rick is definitely suspicious. I know he’s trying to make his wife feel better, but… I don’t know, Sara hasn’t been dead for that long. It isn’t that urgent that her room needs to be cleared out already. I’m also suspicious of him since JTG must have known they were listening to the radio, so if he was listening through the door… But then, if they had the window open (I can’t remember if that was mentioned or not) then they could have heard through that, so perhaps not.
But regardless of his/her identity, maybe JTG is in love with Snow or something, in a crazy, obsessive way. That’s what the song sounded like to me, anyway :P And if she did kill Sara (although I don’t think she did, but it’s possible) maybe that’s why, since Snow was in love with her. Still, I don’t know why she would terrorise her and her friends though. I mean, Snow I can understand, because she might just be crazy jealous that Snow still doesn’t care about her, but the others… I don’t know xD
So, Sara was hiding a great stack of money… I wonder what that could have been for. I highly doubt she was saving up for a house, like Snow considered. Surely she would be keeping the money in the bank, if that was the case, so it makes me think that the money was obtained illegally (or in a secret transaction, even if it wasn’t actually illegal) although like Snow I have no idea what for. The only thing I’m coming up with now is it’s some sort of drug money because having it in cash reminds me of Breaking Bad, but I doubt that’s what it is. Or maybe it is… I have no idea :P
Also, this is something I noticed in the last chapter but forgot to mention: Why did Snow call Rick Mr Blake? I mean, wouldn’t he have a different last name to Sara, since he’s not her father?
March 13, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :) Yeah, Snow... poor kid, she never really got the chance to grieve what with JTG going on the attack almost immediately. With Sara’s laptop, I almost went ahead and let Snow get into it just because it seems pretty obvious that there would be something on it, but hey I can always use more mysteries xD I was considering not revealing anything about the desk yet either, but again it was so obvious that there was something going on with the desk, so yeah :P
I’m glad Rick is suspicious. I want most everyone to be a little suspicious, so that’s good. Really, the idea behind the radio bit was to almost give JTG a sort of supernatural element to her. That’s not to say that JTG is a supernatural being in any way. I suppose I should say super human instead. JTG knows things she shouldn’t, things she couldn’t. I want to make it seem as though there’s nothing JTG can’t do and that they aren’t safe from her anywhere. Of course, since Rick was in close proximity, it does make him a fine suspect. I actually didn’t mention the window, but I suppose I really ought to since otherwise it does make Rick look awfully guilty xD
That song puts a different perspective on JTG and her motives, doesn’t it? It’s weird, I really like that song but hearing it in this context, it’s the creepiest thing. But yeah, we don’t know anything about why JTG is doing any of this or what she stands to gain from terrorizing them. Your theory is a good one, a really good one actually but obviously I can’t say anything about it. This story bugs me that way. I can never talk about anything because anything I say is a spoiler :P But I guess I could say this much; JTG’s reasons for terrorizing Snow might not be the same reasons she’s terrorizing Clara, and she might also have different reasons for attacking Jackson and so forth. Or it could be all the exact same reasons. See, I'm never allowed to actually give anyone anything :P
That money is a big mystery, I can say that. It’ll be a good while before we find out where she got it, and probably even longer before we get to what she planned to use it for. Ah, Breaking Bad. How I miss you, old friend xD Lol, wow I messed up really bad with Rick’s last name :P That’s hilarious. I even came up with this whole reason why Sara’s mom kept Blake as her last name instead of taking on Rick’s back when she first appeared. Thanks for pointing that out. I have no idea how long I would have kept going with that before I realized I done goofed :P
March 13, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 23 Reply
I don’t really have any idea what Michael’s (and Brad’s) deal is at the moment, to be honest xD Even after his talk with Emily, I can’t really think of a reason why Michael would need to rape (or just have sex with, I’m not sure if that distinction has to be there) girls like Mary. Unless he’s a supernatural being who has to repopulate his own race or something, which seems unlikely xD But maybe it’s so unlikely it’s true :P Or maybe Michael is the “he” Brad and him were talking about, only Brad doesn’t know that, and thinks he’s some third party. I wonder if it’s related to that myth, though. The one mentioned ages ago, about some dude sacrificing virgin girls or something (I can’t quite remember what it was). But then Mary wasn’t sacrificed, so maybe the thing with Michael and Emily is different, but what he and Brad were talking about is surely related to it. Still, I hope there’s some concrete information soon, I’m dying of curiousness xD
Speaking of curiousness, I really wonder what Steven’s secrets are. Somehow, I don’t think he’ll be safe from JTG even though they’re hoping she’ll leave him alone. I mean, he’s involved now so I don’t see her leaving him be, even if it’s just to threaten him so he doesn’t tell the police or something. Still, I can definitely understand Clara when she said she wished it had been Steven :( Even if he’s their friend, at least JTG wouldn’t be an unknown entity anymore. It seems to me like they’re just moving from one suspect to another but really they’re getting nowhere :/ And nooo, Snow. Don’t talk to Michael. I know you kind of have to, but he’s too creepy :( Listen to Sara and Mary. I felt really sorry for her (Mary) in this chapter. The poor girl. I wonder if JTG knows about that too. It wouldn’t surprise me.
March 24, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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I don’t really expect anyone to be able to figure out Michael and Brad just yet :P I’ve dropped hints and clues here and there, but I don’t think there’s enough out there yet for anyone to be able to put the pieces together in the right order. Although, maybe there is. You’ve collected some of the right pieces, I can say that much without spoiling anything. All of those things are connected, but it would require a very particular point of view for it all to make sense. Cryptic enough? xD Hmm, I’m not even sure myself when what Michael and Brad are up to will come out. If I hadn’t made a massive change to the plot, it would have already have been revealed by now :P It really is all my fault, but you will get something in the next chapter.
Steven’s secrets, and yes he does have some, will come to light before too long. Well, at least one of them will. This is the first time they’ve ever told someone about JTG who was not already being targeted by her, so how JTG will respond to that is anyone’s guess. I wouldn’t say it was part of her plan to bring anyone else into the game, but if she feels she has to she definitely would.
Yeah, you’re completely right that they’re just moving from suspect to suspect. They have no idea what they’re doing or how to track this person down. They’re flailing in the dark with no real plan and no clues pointing them to JTG. That’s why Snow was so quick to jump on Steven. It was the only thing she had at the time. But really, they’re going to be hard pressed to find JTG with their current methods. JTG is seemingly omnipresent and omnipotent and they don’t yet have any real way to combat that until they figure out how JTG can be everywhere at once.
Watching Snow go off to meet Michael was exceptionally tough for Mary. She’s seen him at his worst and knows what he’s capable of and she doesn’t want Snow anywhere near him. She, of course, is sitting on information that would put him in jail at the very least and clearly keep Snow away from him. Will she use it? It would all depend on whether her fear and embarrassment can be overcome by her love and concern for her friend. As it is, Snow has no idea what she’s walking into. She doesn’t trust Michael, but she’s seen a softer, gentler side to him and that’s an easy way to get her to let her guard down. She’s far too much Ariana’s daughter in that regard :P I think it’s safe to assume JTG knows about Michael and Mary. She seems to know everything else, after all xD In fact, if anything is being kept secret in Mistbrook Falls, JTG probably knows about it O.o
March 24, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 24 Reply
Wow, I don’t even know where to start with this chapter xD So much happened, and I find myself more confused than ever, in a good way of course :P That ending… There’s definitely something going on there. I don’t think Michael is JTG (otherwise, surely he would have shown some sign of it) but maybe JTG’s stalking him too. Or maybe she’s Sara the ghost, and she’s trying to get Snow to believe it was him so she deliberately used that song knowing Michael was a fan of it. That’s my theory because that would explain the creepy radio thing if JTG were a ghost, and the text message at the end did sound a bit like JTG does (except without all the insults :P), but… I don’t think Sara would stalk them as a ghost and do things like get Clara’s mum fired. I mean, she may not have been the nicest of people sometimes but they’re her friends and she cared about them.
Anyway, moving on, this order of the Dawnguard sounds interesting. Although, I was a bit confused how Snow randomly knew about this obscure order. I mean, I know she reads a lot and stuff, but she seemed to know a lot about it :P Anyway, I’m not really sure how it fits in with what’s happened so far, but I’m curious to find out. Is Michael trying to get rid of demons or something? Maybe that’s who he and Brad are against, some demon dude :P Still, he hasn’t been mister nice guy most of the time, so it seems a bit strange. I guess I’ll just have to wait and find out :3 I also wonder why Snow was drawn to him so easily. Sure, it was probably deliberate on his part, but… He is a potential suspect, so it seemed strange. Maybe he’s using his supernatural powers or something. Or maybe he’s just a charmer when he wants to be xD
Clara’s portion was really sad :( I feel so sorry for Noel. I guess it just shows how far JTG is willing to go. I can’t believe they fired her, the douchebags at Gellar and Greene National Bank (Hmmm, I wonder where I've heard those names before :P). She should sue or something, since there’s no proof she actually did anything and it’s her livelihood at stake. Heheh, I sound like an American ;) Anyway, I’m really worried for Clara now as well. I get the feeling she’s going to try and do something drastic to stop JTG and it won’t go at all well :/
March 31, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment! Hehe, excellent. Operation: Confuse the Heck out of Everyone is going according to plan :P I’m really going to have to start providing answers to questions at some point instead of just making new questions, aren’t I? Oh, but where’s the fun in that? :P I’ve got to say, I love the idea of Sara’s ghost being JTG. I’ve always wanted JTG to have a sort of supernatural element to her, so I’m glad you’re thinking along those lines. And Sara could stalk them as a ghost if she became a vengeful spirit after her death or something and as you say, it would make an awful lot of things make sense if JTG was a ghost. Lol, it was nice to include a text message that wasn’t insulting anyone. That was a good change. S’s messages will be more helpful than insulting, but they’re stilll anonyomous so S could easily just be JTG messing with them.
It’s funny you mentioned Snow knowing too much about the Dawnguard because I struggled with that part. I didn’t want Michael to ramble on too much explaining about them, so I let Snow already know about them since she spends so much time reading and it let me speed up the scene somewhat by not having to have Michael go into detail. That, of course, makes it weird that she just happens to know so much about them :P That’s going to be one of those parts that I’m going to revisit a million times before I’m ever satisfied with it :/ Well, assuming Michael’s right and the Dawnguard do, in fact, exist and aren’t fictional like Snow thinks then I think it’s safe to say he and Brad are either working against them or are working for them. Which side they’re on is something I don’t think I’ll keep to myself for much longer, but exactly what they’re doing and why will still be a while. Oh, Michael absolutely can be a charmer and he wanted to draw Snow to him so his plan is working pretty well except for her thinking he’s JTG now :P He’s very good at convincing people to do what he wants them to without resorting to supernatural powers*
You’ve not yet seen just how far JTG is willing to go. Muahahahahaha… *ahem* :P Lol, I always though their names sounded like either a bank or a law firm, so when I needed a fictional bank… xD Hehe, yes you’re starting to sound like us Americans. It just means our latest plot to indoctrinate the rest of the world is perfectly on schedule. Be sure to start saying things like “Freedom!” and “’Murica” regularly. It eases the process :P Clara isn’t the most calm and collected person there is, so a drastic response to JTG’s attack on Noel would seem like something she would do. She’s really protective of Noel too, so going after her is a great way to make Clara not think rationally, so it’s good you’re worried about her. JTG won’t react well to another attempt to stop her by Clara.
*This statement should not be taken as evidence that Michael does, in fact, have supernatural powers xD
March 31, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 25 Reply
I really liked seeing what Nikki’s family was like. Randy (that name xD) and Julia are definitely not the nicest people ever. I have a theory about them, actually… But it would be a bit embarrassing if I was wrong, so I want to wait and gather more evidence before I say what it is xD I think Mary is right though. I know it would be hard for Nikki to hear her parents say they don’t love her, if that’s what they choose to do if/when she tells them, but… Well, to be honest they don’t strike me as particularly loving in the first place so it wouldn’t make much of a difference. And this Labor Day incident, what is that? I'm very interested to find out...
Hmm, this S… Despite what Snow thinks (who knows, maybe supernatural beings just want to get with the times and decided to use mobiles :P) I think S is Sara. I mean, it sounds like her from the way she talks, and when she said “I’m the reason she’s gone” maybe it’s Sara acknowledging that her own mistakes led to her death. But then, since Sara just outright talked to Snow and the others last time, I wonder why she’d bother with all the text messages and cryptic talk instead of just saying it’s her. My other thoughts were Brad or Emily, since they see Michael and thus could keep an eye on him. Although I don’t see how Sara’s death could be their fault. Or Sophia maybe, but I don’t think she’d be so cryptic (and again, I don’t see how Sara’s death could have been her fault). Eh hem. Anyway, after that long spiel I’ve decided that after Sara Emily is the most likely candidate, because she’s telling Snow to stay away from Michael and she knows what Michael did to Mary (and presumably, other people).
Poor Clara :( It’s good in a way she stopped herself, since I don’t think telling Jacob would have protected her mother and friends from JTG at all. But then, Jacob does deserve to know so I hope she gets a JTG-threat free moment to tell him. Although, to be honest I’d be very surprised if Jacob didn’t figure out what Clara did. Surely at the very least he’d suspicious after that xD She wasn’t particularly subtle. Anyway, because of that I’m very worried for Clara, because if he did figure it out then JTG could still get very angry and hurt her :(
Noooo, Snow… Nooo, don’t go down that path. Michael may seem charming but he’s like ten years older than you and no matter what side he’s on, he’s still got some issues. I’m worried about her… I know she wants to trust her instincts, but when everyone’s telling you to stay away from this guy their opinions can’t be discounted :/ Anyway, I’m very worried about what will happen next.
April 10, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting :) I wish I could say Randy’s name was just random, but that would be a lie xD I thought it was sort of funny, what with the type of character he is. My sense of humor is bad :P Hmm, I’m curious what this theory you have about them is. There’s not a lot of information about them yet, so I’m really interested how close you are to the truth. I guess I’ll have to wait and see. Ack, I gotten a taste of my own medicine, haven’t I? It is bitter xD Even though I think in their minds they love Nikki very much, her parents aren’t the type to show that they do. They’re trying to mold her into a carbon copy of themselves, and to them that’s showing their love. So you’re probably right that Nikki wouldn’t see much difference if she told them, unless of course they could come around to see their daughter’s side of things. As for Labor Day, well let’s just say a lot of things happened on that holiday :P
Exactly! Traditional haunting is so old school. Texting and Facebook are the newest and best ways to haunt people… which is why I refuse to go see that Unfriended movie, but I’m getting off topic :P Those are all excellent guesses about S. It could easily be any of them, especially Emily and Sara. Well, I guess a bit less easily for Sara, but still xD I won’t be keeping S’s identity a secret for long. I’ve already got one mystery texter, I really don’t need another one :P Although, it will be a while before we come face to face with S, so who knows? S could always be lying xD
You’re right that telling Jacob wouldn’t have protected anyone from JTG at this point. Clearly, JTG doesn’t just deal in secrets. She managed to get Noel fired easily enough, and I’d feel confident in saying she would be willing to do a lot more if she needed to. Lol, Clara’s not the most subtle person around, is she? Eh, she’ll never be able to be a spy, that’s for sure. It would be pretty interesting to see JTG’s reaction if Jacob figured it out, though. She loves her game, and if Clara managed to ruin it I don’t think JTG would take that very well. I would imagine a very explosive confrontation at best.
Hahaha, I knew you were going to warn Snow away from Michael after the ending xD Honestly, I don’t think she’s even considering the possibility of anything romantic at the moment. She’s still dealing with her breakup and she really just sees Michael as someone she likes being around and talking to. She’s conflicted about him because she’s hearing all these people warning her about Michael, but all she’s seen so far is a nice, charming guy that seems to really like her. She’ll find it hard to justify their opinions when she’s getting first hand experience with him.
April 10, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 26 Reply
It’s good that both Clara and Snow now know that they’re not crazy and that Sara appearing wasn’t a dream :P I am curious what she really is. I think she’s probably a Guide or something, like Cooper and Claire. Although I suppose as Clara said a secret twin sister is always a possibility :P As for S… Now I’m thinking maybe she’s not Sara, and maybe she is Emily or something after all. Or Brad, but I think Emily’s more likely.
Noo, Snow… Don’t start feeling things for Michael. I do think Clara is right, and she does like him, even if he’s so much older. Although I’m not convinced it’s her natural feelings, since Michael gives me supernatural vibes and maybe that’s why he was able to form a connection with her so easy. He’s got magical pheromones or something xD
Aww, Ariana told someone :( It was very sweet of her to do what she did. Although, I think she is lucky though that Noel didn’t get really offended, cos I’d imagine some people would. If Noel does get her job back I hope JTG doesn’t target Ariana too :/ I mean, even if she doesn’t know about JTG, Ariana’s still going around and potentially lifting some of JTG’s ammo, so… I hope she stays safe. I’m also getting worried because if Snow makes it out of Michael’s house alive and well I feel like Ariana’s probably going to tell her about her illness soon and I don’t know if I can cope with the sadness :(
Arrrrggghhh!!!! Nooo why does it have to rain now??? Snow :( I don’t think Michael’s going to murder her, or do anything to her (at least, he won’t personally. I can’t speak for possible supernatural beings and the like :P) but I know everything’s not going to turn out okay. Still, despite my worries about Snow’s wellbeing I am looking forward to the next chapter. No matter what happens, I’m sure there will be some solid information to be gleaned :P Well, I hope there will be anyway. I wonder what’s going to happen when the others (cough, Mary) realise Snow’s alone with him. I mean, they can’t really get to her, but… >.< Snow. Please be okay… Anyway, overall this was a really good chapter. I’m anxious to read what happens next, and I really hope nothing terrible happens, although I’m doubtful my wish will come true.
April 20, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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I never really meant to drag out Snow thinking she might be crazy/dreaming about Sara for as long as I did. With S now in the picture, all of the girls need to know about each other’s encounters with Sara so I had to squeeze that in. I always expect everyone to automatically assume that Sara is a Guide. It makes perfect sense that she would be one, since that’s what happened with Cooper and Claire. If she isn’t one, though, it does give me an easy explanation to hide whatever she really is :P Haha, Clara’s twin theory is actually a small Pretty Little Liars reference that I don’t expect anyone who doesn’t know the story of the books to ever pick up on. Of course, that doesn’t mean Clara isn’t right xD
Snow is definitely starting to develop feelings on some level for Michael at this point. Clara’s comments made her face that reality a bit sooner than she would have otherwise, but now that’s it’s front and center she’s going to have to deal with it. And since she’s going to be stuck alone with him for a while, she’s going to have to deal with it quickly without much time to prepare herself. Lol, I love the idea of Michael having magical pheromones! Magic, obviously, exists in this world so it’s certainly possible.
Yeah, Ariana is pretty lucky that Noel didn’t get mad. She probably would have if the offer had come from anyone else, but she’s known Ariana a long time and she knows her intentions are nothing but pure. Telling about her illness helped too, I think. I do want her to be a bit more resilient to the idea at first, so I’ll likely edit that in at some point. It’s interesting about JTG. I’m not completely sure if JTG would ever want to target Ariana and Kayla directly. Those two are a dangerous team when they’re threatened and JTG, who knows everything, would definitely know that so she’s certainly never going to start sending them texts. With their finances, they could bring the wrath of God down on JTG and tear the town apart looking for her, which is the last thing she’d want. Indirectly, such as with Noel and her job, that’s another story altogether *cue maniacal laughter* xD Actually, the biggest reason Ariana hasn’t told Snow already is because I can’t bring myself to write that chapter :P Usually for something that important, I would have already started with at least a rough draft of it, but I can’t do it. I know I have to, and soon, but I know I’m going to be miserable after I write so I’m putting it off for as long as I can. If you hear someone sobbing hysterically from across the Pacific, don’t worry about it. It’s just me and it means I’ve finished that scene :P
Lol, yeah that’s pretty inconvenient timing for rain. But I’m sure Snow and Michael will have a fun, pleasant, trouble-free evening. It’s just the two of them (probably xD) locked in a big, creepy house on the outskirts of town. What could possibly go wrong? :P People mistrust Michael so much that I changed the ending of this chapter just to take some heat off of him. He was going to drive out ahead of Snow to make sure the road was clear and safe for her, a perfectly gentlemanly thing to do… or so I thought. When my sister read it, she immediately became suspicious when Michael returned saying the road was flooded. She thought Michael was lying to keep Snow there :P The next several chapters should hopefully answer some questions (and probably introduce a few new ones :P) about Michael, JTG, and a few other things. I’ve got to start revealing some things because I’m starting to get to the point where I have so many secrets floating around that it’s hard to keep track of who knows what. As for what the others will do when they find out she’s stuck with Michael… well, there’s not much they can do. But then, they might have a few pressing problems of their own to deal with instead of worrying about Snow. Anyway, I’ve rambled on way too long. I really shouldn't reply to these unless I have something pressing to do that will shut me up xD Thanks for the comment :)
April 20, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 27 Reply
“Michael, are you a rapist?” If only you knew, Snow. If only you knew… Not that I think he’s going to rape her. He might use his magical pheromones (either the figuratively or literally magical kind :P) to lure her into it, but I don’t think he’d rape her. Also, how did he get into her phone to read her messages? The sneaky weasel. Although, I do have a theory about what happened with Mary, which makes him seem a little less douchebaggy (but still pretty douchebaggy). I’m too afraid to say what it is though cos it would be super embarrassing if I was wrong xD
Haha, I found it funny when Michael was asking her about having two mums. Not because it was a funny conversation, but Snow’s answer was the exact same thing I say when someone asks me what it’s like being a twin :P Anyway, their interaction in this chapter was kind of creepy but nice at the same time. I really don’t know what to think of Michael, to be honest. I mean, sometimes he’s acting like a douchebag and yet he seemed pretty nice in this chapter. And it didn’t seem like he was putting it on, at least, not completely. He does seem to genuinely like Snow. As for Snow, I’m very worried about her… Even if Michael turns out to be a misunderstood guy with a heart of gold, he’s still like ten years older than her. But I suppose she’s probably still really upset about Sara and Jackson, so maybe that’s why she got attached to him so easily.
And that ending! I definitely wasn’t expecting that. I thought it would be a lot longer before JTG would go after them physically. Still, I’m not sure if JTG would have actually killed Snow… Hurt her, maybe. Scared her, definitely. But it seems to me that she likes being the creepy stalker and killing them would mean that would end pretty quickly. Unless maybe getting Michael involved stuffed things up for her, and that’s why she attacked Snow. I mean, if he is magical knight or whatever I’d assume he’s not someone you want working against you. Anyway, overall this was a really good chapter, but very scary xD I really hope nothing else terrible happens, but I feel that’s probably a wasted wish :P
May 3, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting! Heh, yes, if only Snow knew. (Snow asking that was a vague Friends reference, by the way :P Phoebe asked the same thing of the creepy hitchhiker that Joey picked up.) That, I imagine, wouldn't go over very well with her. Especially now that she's coming to trust him and develop feelings for him. Learning that wouldn't end well... for Michael :P Michael got into Snow's phone because Snow is careless like me xD Neither of us have any sort of password on our phones to keep nosy people from finding out about our secret stalkers. Oh, but I must know your theory about Mary! Especially if it makes Michael less douchebaggy. Let's face it, he needs a lot of help in that area xD
Lol, that's funny you give the same answer. It's completely true in both cases, after all. I'm glad you found their interactions creepy and nice both. I want people to question everything they think they know about Michael... and then question those questions :P I think Michael does genuinely care about Snow, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't sacrifice her in a blood magic ritual to appease his demon-god xD I'm kidding... mostly :P But seriously, Michael does care about Snow. Whatever his intentions are for her, he does care about her. He's lied to her, obviously, and he's clearly keeping a lot of things from her, but no matter what else he cares about her. As for Snow, you're right that she's still very upset about Jackson and Sara. Those were two painful, emotional blows within a week of each other as she's far from over it. Don't write off magical pheromones as the reason for their closeness just yet, though xD
Killing them is much more of an endgame scenario, and JTG is far from her endgame. She's got a lot more secrets to attack them with before she gets there. Would she kill one/all of them at the end? Absolutely. In fact, I'd say it'd be pretty tough to resolve all of this without at least a bit of bloodshed. Theirs, JTG's, someone else's... well, that's a question for another day :P Even if Michael isn't a magical knight (and he certainly seems like one since he decided to attack an intruder with a sword xD) he's still not someone you want fighting you. Michael has money, power, and influence. Not as much as Kayla and Ariana, but a lot and he could bring all those resources down on JTG. As for why JTG attacked Snow... let's say she had a very specific reason for everything she did. Anyway, I'm glad the chapter came out scary. That sort of thing is new territory for me, so I hope it worked. Well... I promise that nothing terrible will happen to Snow in the next chapter... because she isn't in it :P We'll be dealing with what some of the others are doing during this storm. Terrible things may, or may not, happen to some of them xD
May 3, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 28 Reply
Poor Mary :( I felt so bad for her when she was worrying about Snow, but she couldn’t do anything. I understand how she feels, but I really hope she does find the courage to tell someone, and soon. I have a theory about why Michael did it, and it’s kind of embarrassing if I’m wrong, but I’ll say it before I change my mind: Essentially, I think Emily asked him to have sex with Mary so she wouldn’t be a virgin anymore and would then be protected from that serial killer/demon/whatever it is that apparently killed virgin girls and stuff. But even if that’s true I still think he’s pretty douchebaggy because he could have at least tried to use those magical pheromones of his and charmed her instead of raping her. And even that would still have been a douchebaggy move, in a way, but slightly better. Anyway, I hope I don't sound really idiotic xD
Mr Winston and Mr Banks conversation was very interesting… SO I guess they’re not on Michael’s side? xD It just makes me even more worried for Snow. Whatever they need her for, it can’t be good. Or maybe they’re the good guys, in which case whatever Michael wants from her can’t be good. But, I’m more inclined to believe that these guys are up to something slightly more shifty than Michael at the moment. Anyway, I wonder if JTG separated Mary out deliberately, perhaps so she could hear what Mr Winston and Emilia’s dad was saying. I was a little surprised by her reaction to what she heard though. Really, Mary? There’s a bunch of weird things going on, possible ghosts and the like, and your conclusion over what you heard is that Mr Winston loves his cosplay? :P Or rehearsing a play, really? xD
Now, the Miranda thing… I wonder if she bares relation to Jenna :P Anyway, I wonder what happened with her. If Sara and the others were responsible for her death, then… O.o Still, I am a little confused about the other girl’s involvement. The chapter before when Mary and Nikki were talking about it, they acted like they hadn’t know Sara was the instigator before she told Mary (or Nikki, I can’t remember which one it was) but then in this chapter it seemed like they knew all along that Sara was the one responsible. Unless they’re talking about two separate things, but it didn’t seem like it.
May 22, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting! Your theory doesn’t sound remotely idiotic. It’s a very logical line of thought, especially considering Emily and Michael’s last conversation. I can neither confirm nor deny if you’re right, but it’s a fantastic theory nonetheless. I would have to agree that either way it would be a douchebaggy thing for Michael to do... unless not doing it would have been even worse.
Well, assuming Michael is who they’re talking about then no, they’re not on his side xD Okay, okay, I’m not even going to do that :P No, Winston and Banks are not on Michael’s side but I’m glad you’re still somewhat questioning who the good guys are. I like that, just a tiny hint of doubt xD That said, you should be getting a clear idea of who is good and who isn’t pretty soon ;) Mary overhearing that conversation was more of a side effect than JTG’s actual intention. Her hearing it doesn't really have any effect on JTG at all. What JTG wanted and why she chose that moment to officially involve Steven must remain a mystery… at least for a little while :P
With Mary’s reaction to overhearing the conversation, I had a tough time with it honestly. I’ve always thought of Mary as being pretty rational. She somewhat mockingly suggested that Sara’s ghost might be haunting them a few chapters ago, but apart from Snow I think she’s the least likely to actually buy into that idea. Combine that with her friends disappearing for hours and Snow stuck with Michael, it felt like she wouldn’t be remotely concerned about whatever they were talking about when Steven and Jackson showed up. On the other hand, my original thought was to have her seriously think about what they were saying. She wasn’t going to make any real connections at the time, but it was going to sit in the back of her mind and eventually she could put the pieces together especially if she heard the word Dawnguard again. That, of course, could still happen. So, I’m curious as to what you think she should do? Should I leave it as it is or have Mary really pay attention and absorb what they’re saying? Or heck, maybe have her respond in a completely different way altogether. I was torn when I wrote it and I still am now, so I’m open to all suggestions.
Hehe, the only reason I called it The Miranda Thing was so that it would be a reference to The Jenna Thing :P This chapter was filled with references to everything from Dr. Who to Mean Girls and it was so easy to slip in a Pretty Little Liars reference like that. I mean, even the title is a reference. I got a bit carried away with all the references but I was having fun seeing how many I could slip in there xD I don’t know if I’ll keep referring to what happened as the Miranda thing in the future, but for this chapter it fit with my theme of referencing things xD
I didn’t make it nearly clear enough, but what Mary and Nikki were talking about a few chapters back and the Miranda thing are two completely separate events that took place over the same holiday weekend. What Mary and Nikki were talking about was much more personal to Mary than the Miranda thing was. I definitely need to go back and make it clear that they’re talking about something else. I don’t plan on keeping Labor Day a secret for much longer. It’s not something I want to sit on for too long. There won’t be any direct effects from the Miranda thing any time soon though. It’ll have much more impact after the point where I’ve decided to split the story in half. Things will change and the Miranda thing will play a pretty important role. Anyway, that’s enough of my ramblings for one day xD Thanks again for the comment!
May 22, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Eh, even if not doing it is worse, I still think Michael seriously lacks empathy over what he did (or appears to on the surface, anyway). Like in that chapter, when he told Emily it’s all her problem. So even if my theory is true, for me he’s still in the douchebag category. At least, for now :P For all I know he's an emotional hurricane inside about it xD
Anyway, I think Mary should at least think about it, even if she doesn’t draw any connections. I mean, there’s obviously something going on that’s a bit out of the ordinary with Sara showing up to visit the four of them, so even though she's more of a rational person it seemed strange she’d just dismiss it like that. Even considering she’s distracted with her friends disappearing and Snow being with Michael, I think she’d at least be a bit curious about what they’re saying, although she might forget about it the moment she sees Steven and Jackson or something. So I think you should have her absorb what they’re saying, even if she gets distracted right after.
May 23, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Oh, Michael's just a big teddy bear underneath it all. Deep down, he's a really sweet and empathetic guy xD But yeah, still a douchebag no matter what. Regardless of his reasons, doubtlessly there were other options he and Emily could have pursued.
Thanks for your thoughts! I agree, she should have a very different reaction to what she's hearing. Hmm, this is actually giving me ideas xD That's probably not a good thing. This will end up being even longer than I'm thinking :P Still, she needs to take in what they're saying. I do think she'll still forget all about it once Jackson and Steven show up, but like you said with everything that's happening, it would make sense for her to question it more and I can use her overhearing that in a way I didn't plan. Thanks again for taking the time to push me in the right direction :D
May 24, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 29 Reply
Heheh, when I read the bit about Dennis sitting in a high back chair I thought, all he needs is a white cat to stroke evilly and he’s perfect xD Sorry, I have a strange mind… Anyway, it’s good that Noel got her job back. You definitely don’t want to get on the wrong side of Ariana, that’s for sure xD I do feel kind of sorry for Dennis though. I can’t tell if he’s on JTG’s side, bein threatened by her or a combination of both. Also, I was surprised to see JTG had actually contacted him. It makes me wonder who else she’s contacted… >.<
And yay, Cooper! I’ve missed him :’( When he said he had some Guide stuff to take care of I couldn’t help but wonder if he’d be guiding any of the other characters. I know it’s unlikely, but… I’m gonna be hopeful anyway that he’ll appear in the next few chapters :P Anyway, overall he definitely added some intriguing info to the mix… So, there is someone in Mistbrook Falls with the same powers. I wonder, does that mean they’ve died as well? Anyway, I’m assuming this person is JTG, since she does definitely seem to have a supernatural thingy going on, with all her stalking and moving between places like a ninja. I mean I don’t see how she could have switched between bothering Snow and Michael as well as the others at school on the same day in that weather without magical powers to assist her :P Plus all the stuff with the song leads me to believe she’s got powers. I suppose it could also be Michael, but since he came out with a sword to fight JTG away I’m more inclined to believe he’s a Buffy the Vampire Slayer like person, so he’s human with enhanced abilities and magical pheremones or something rather than someone with powers like Cooper.
I’m also curious about the fire. Maybe I’m just overly suspicious, but it seems a bit coincidental. I think maybe JTG was behind it because she wanted to get Ariana and Kayla out of town for something… Eep, now I’m really nervous to see what happens >.< I hope everyone gets out okay.
Anyway, I really liked seeing how Ariana found the warehouse and what made her want to turn it into her home. It’s really nice that there’s that connection with her grandfather, as well as it being where she first met Kayla. It’s heartwarming how connected she and the warehouse are :’). I seem to be in a sentimental mood today xD
July 1, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment! Hahahaha, that’s hilarious xD I don’t know if we’ll ever see Dennis’s home life, but if it happens he’s absolutely going to have a big white cat as a pet. Heh, yeah you don’t want to get on Ariana’s bad side these days. She’s still soft, sweet little Ari until you tick her off. Then the claws come out :P I mainly wanted to use that scene to demonstrate her growth. She’s gone from being this scared little girl that was afraid to go to the mall by herself to being a woman that will walk into a big corporation like she owns the place and tell them exactly what’s going to happen. It’s fun for me to go back and see how much she’s changed. It’s good you feel sorry for Dennis, since he’s kind of stuff in a bad place. He’s not at all on JTG’s side and is being coerced by her, so he’s trapped between JTG, who is obviously scary, and Ariana and Kayla, who can be pretty intimidating when they want to be. And yeah, it makes you wonder who else JTG is talking with and using to achieve her evil ends :P That, to me, is one of the scariest parts is that JTG really could be anywhere and everywhere if she’s threatened enough people into working for her.
Hehe, yeah Cooper’s back again for a little while. I really wanted to have him in more of this chapter, but it started getting so long that I had to cut the back end of it off so that part will pop up a little later. As for Coop guiding some of the other characters… well, I’ll put that in the ‘maybe someday soon’ category. But that doesn’t mean he won’t be around more often, because I’m planning on having him show up much more often than he has been so far. I miss having him around, so I’m looking for any and every reason to bring him back.
Yes, someone in Mistbrook Falls has magical powers. The only clues I can give are these two; they are most certainly still alive and they are not a Guide. Despite my lack of helpful hints, you’ll find out who it is very, very soon :P Making JTG seem supernatural has always been a big goal for me, so I’m glad you’re thinking that way. I’ve said before that I want her to seem all-seeing, all-knowing, and everywhere at the same time. That’s not to say JTG isn’t actually supernatural and I just want it to seem like she is for whatever reason because JTG may well be supernatural. It’d be too big of a spoiler, I think, to say one way or the other. Okay, it’s official. At some point in the future Michael will be referred to as Buffy xD Maybe by Clara, she seems like that sort of character :P Well, let’s just say Snow is definitely going to question his choice of a sword as a home defense weapon. I don’t think the average person knows how to wield a sword other than to just stick ‘em with the pointy end ;)
Other than making JTG seem supernatural, my other desire was to make practically everything seem like a potential JTG plot, so I'm glad you're suspicious of the fire xD Some things are perfectly innocent accidents that have nothing to do with JTG (I won't say if the fire was one of them :P) but just the fact that it could have been JTG's doing makes me happy.
I very nearly made a critical error with this chapter. My first thought about the fire was that it would have been at the warehouse and it would have burned to the ground. Kayla would have associated the destruction of the warehouse with Ariana's impending death and seeing it destroyed would have encouraged Ariana to share the same story of how she found it. It would have had a powerful emotional impact, at least on me, but I couldn't go through with it. It would have been a really bad decision, I thought, to get rid of a place that held so much importance for so long. I love the warehouse too much anyway, so it lived to see another day. Besides, Ari would have strangled me in my sleep :P But yeah, that was a story I'd never really told before. Ariana's always had a really close connection to the warehouse, but I never explained exactly how it began. There's nothing wrong with a bit of sentimentality every now and again. I'm pretty sure it's good for the soul xD
July 1, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 30 Reply
Tsk, I don’t know what Alana expected when ordering from a company called Redd’s Wedding Supplies :P Let’s face it, they were doomed from the start. There’s mistakes and then there’s just being stupid ;) Aaaanyway, onto the more important stuff. There was a lot of interesting information in this chapter, starting with Zoe. I must say, out of all the people I thought might be the supernatural person Cooper was talking about, she wasn’t very high on the list. In fact, she wasn’t even on the list and I hadn’t given her a second thought at all really xD Anyway, I hope she appears soon cos witches are awesome :P
As for Brad… I’m not sure what to make of him in this chapter. He was cool in the first half, and his banter with Sophia made me laugh but was sweet and encouraging for her at the same time. But then it gets to the end and he’s talking about killing Snow. No. I won’t allow that, Brad :/ I don’t think he’s a bad person, and I think I get where he’s coming from - presumably, killing Snow will stop this dude from hurting anyone else if they’re right, the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, blah blah blah… But still, I’m wary of him now. I’m with Michael on this one, just tell Snow the truth and protect her or something! Violence is not the answer :/
Moving on, I wonder who it was he and Michael were talking about, with the girl they supposedly killed before… At least, that’s what it sounded like. My thoughts jumped to Sara immediately when they started talking about it but I pretty much straight away realised it can’t be her, since before both Brad and Michael were insisting they didn’t kill her and they seemed sincere about it. Particularly Brad, and he’s the one who supposedly was involved in the girl’s death or whatever. No, I assume the girl was that Miranda (did I get the name right?) they were talking about before. I’m really curious about that, so I hope Sophia and Brad’s date is soon if that’s what he wants to tell her xD I thought it seemed like the girls were involved in her death, and they didn’t seem to associate it with Brad, so… Perhaps he framed them? Sort of? So many questions…
July 24, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Lol, no ordering from them probably wasn't the best idea :P I'm not sure how that place is even still in business. Of course, no wedding supplied by them is ever a dull affair xD Hehe, I don't expect anyone to suspect Zoe of being the person Cooper mentioned. If anyone does, I'll be greatly surprised. She's only had maybe three lines of dialogue so far so she's not exactly a character anyone's thinking about. I really don't know when she'll reappear, since Michael and Brad are trying to keep their distance from her, but it shouldn't be too long. Oooh, oooh, I know! Sorry... ideas are forming over here xD
Brad's a complicated guy, that's really the only way to describe him. He doesn't want to hurt Snow, but he will if he has to. He's very focused and direct. He looks for the quickest and most decisive way to solve a problem and doesn't worry about looking for alternatives. In this case, killing Snow takes care of his problem, so that's what he wants to do. Telling her the truth would just make things complicated. Michael, obviously, isn't going to just let it happen which will definitely cause some conflict between them.
Well, you're right that they weren't talking about Sara. That doesn't mean neither one of them is responsible for her death, but they were talking about someone else. Miranda (you got the name right ;)) on the other hand is a perfectly valid guess. The details surrounding her death will be coming very soon, before Sophia and Brad's date. The girls are definitely involved, but they may not know everything that happened that day. In fact, I'd say its very likely that they don't. As for what Brad intends to tell Sophia on their date... well, I'm not sure he'd want to confess to a murder while on a date with a cop xD Although he does have a witch for a friend, so Brad could get his guilt off of his chest and then Zoe could wipe her memories*
*This is in no way a confirmation that Zoe can, in fact, erase people's memories xDJuly 24, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 31 Reply
I really don’t know what to think of Michael now :P He was perfectly nice in this chapter and his concern for Snow is convincing, but… I still get a creepy vibe from him, even if I put aside the whole situation with Mary. Maybe it’s because even if Michael has the best intentions in the world, he’s still ten years older than her. I’m not totally against large gaps in relationships or something like that, but when one of the people involved is only sixteen it feels very slimy to me xD Anyway, I’m really wondering what’ll happen when Snow finds out about Mary, if she does. Surely she will, at some point, and it’s sure to knock him down a peg or two million in her mind - even if he does end up having a good reason for it. Heheh, he is a quick thinker though, I’ll give him that. But although Snow may have been convinced by his excuse for using a sword to fend off JTG, I was not convinced in the slightest :P To be fair, I do have prior knowledge, but… Eh.
Anyway, the second part of the chapter was just as interesting as the first. I’m glad there was a bit more information about Miranda… And Mary’s theory definitely raised a few good points. But, even though what she’s saying could make sense I think Sara is definitely dead. There is, in my opinion, too much evidence to think otherwise :P Now, she could still be JTG as some sort of ghost/guide thing, but like Snow I don’t think Sara would be like that. No matter what, I do think she cared about her friends and she’d never torment them like this. In my opinion she’s more likely to be S if anything, and even that I'm sceptical of. Miranda, though… I could see her being JTG, as a ghost or alive. I don’t know, just from the girls’ description of her, it seems possible. And it would make sense, especially if she is really dead because then she’d want revenge for her own death and perhaps she’s most focussed on Snow because Snow’s the current queen bee, but… I don’t know. I feel like there’s something I’m missing, and that connection to Snow doesn’t feel personal enough. Anyway, I think I’ve confused myself enough for the night xD Theory crafting is hard work.
One thing I was rather surprised about is that Snow can apparently read Latin, since it’s not a language commonly taught anymore :P
August 25, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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If you don't know what to think of Michael then I'm succeeding far beyond my expectations (which weren't all that high, honestly) and that makes me happy. I want Michael to be a constant source of concern, even when he's being nice. I agree that the age gap plays into that somewhat and it was intentional to a degree. Michael was supposed to be a high school student, but it all seemed much more creepy if he was older. If they ever start dating, I feel bad for him when it's time to 'meet the parents' :P Kayla has a lot of guns xD I never want to say anything for certain when I haven't written it yet, but I would say it's 99.9% probable that Snow will find out about Mary. She pretty much has to, and when she eventually does... yeah, it's gonna completely change her view of him. Whatever his reasons, Mary is one of Snow's closest friends and she won't forgive that easily. Have you ever heard Miranda Lambert's Gunpowder and Lead? That's sort of how I imagine Snow reacting :P Michael better have magical powers because he'll need them. Snow was raised by Kayla, after all xD Of course, a betrayal like that would likely devastate her. She's at a place where she feels she can't trust anyone outside of her little circle of friends and she's opened herself up to Michael. Being betrayed by someone she trusts and really cares about would crush her... and her mom's dying too. Eh... I might need to get Snow some psychiatric help. She's on her way to getting a lot of really bad news.
Haha, there is a lot of evidence to prove that Sara is dead xD I feel a little weird writing those scenes with them debating if Sara is still alive. I mean, you were all at her funeral. It just felt like something they might consider when faced with evidence that Sara might still be alive and that 'she's a ghost' isn't the most logical response for them to have. Sara did genuinely care about her friends, that's true, but she cared about herself more, at least back then. Mary may be reaching with her theory, but selling out her friends to save herself is something Sara might possibly have been willing to do. She wouldn't have tormented them all this time, though. That's something altogether different, although I would imagine death changes people, so... :P With Miranda... you're getting warm, I'll leave it at that. You are missing something and it'd be pretty tough to connect the pieces without that information. Heck, it would be hard to connect all the pieces even with that information. Ah, the web I've woven xD Miranda really did hate all of the girls though, Sara in particular. If she knew Snow had all of her popularity, she wouldn't be at all happy about it and would have set out to do whatever was necessary to destroy her.
Snow can read Latin, yes. She can actually speak three languages in addition to being able to read Latin fairly well. English, Spanish, and French. It's definitely something she's learned mostly on her own. She loves to learn, she loves language, and it seemed like something she would have some grasp of. At least that's what I was aiming for. Hopefully it doesn't seem too silly :P Thanks for commenting :) I usually say that at the beginning... we're doing things backwards tonight xD
August 25, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 32 Reply
I’m glad that we finally found what happened with Miranda. I wasn’t expecting the story (if it is the full story, anyway) to be revealed anytime soon, so that made me happy xD Although, it definitely raises a lot more questions. Firstly, I wonder what it was Sara knew about Miranda. I really don’t have any idea what it could be, since I don’t know much about Miranda in general… But since it made Miranda apparently go ballistic and attack her, it must’ve been something serious.
I’m curious about why JTG targeted Jackson and Steven too, assuming she is targeting the others because of the Miranda thing. Unlike Snow I think Steven was targeted for more than just him knowing too much… Surely there’s more to it than that. But then again, I really have no idea, since I don’t know any of Steven’s secrets yet xD And Jackson’s too, aside from his night with Emilia. Anyway, I hope Steven is successful with his hacking or whatever of Sara’s computer. I’m really curious to learn more about her plans and everything, so I hope there’s lots of answers to be found on it :P
Well Snow, you might be completely worryless when being massaged by Michael but I am very much creeped out xD Still, I feel really bad for her, since Michael’s one of the few people she feels she can really trust and when she finds out about Mary, her image of him will be shattered. I just hope it happens sooner rather than later, which would hopefully lessen the blow at least a little bit. But then even if Michael does tell her his secrets he’s highly unlikely to open that can of worms along with everything else he’s been hiding, so that means Mary herself will probably have to mention it (or Emily, I suppose, but that seems unlikely) which I don’t see happening for a while :/ I hope I’m wrong. I want to see Michael get his arse handed to him for that xD
September 22, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Well, it isn't the whole story, but it's 99% of it. Honestly, I've been wanted to get that information out there for a while now, there just hasn't been a place to fit it in. It was a mystery that didn't need to be a mystery, so I leapt on the first chance I got to reveal it. I wrote another version of this chapter that was a flashback to Labor Day and Sara came back as a POV character. It had everything about what Sara knew about Miranda, whether or not Sara meant to push her off the cliff, and what Sara did to Mary. That one wouldn't have raised any questions at all :P That's why I eventually settled on this one instead. The other just revealed way too much. I went back and forth for ages on which version to use because I really liked the other one. I still want to use it sometime though. I have no idea where, but somewhere :P
Jackson and Steven both have their share of secrets, no doubt. That doesn't necessarily mean that JTG chose to target them because of those secrets, but they do have them and I'm sure JTG will use those secrets for all sorts of mischief at some point :P Heh, I very nearly forgot about Sara's computer xD I've been meaning to get it to Steven for a while, but since Steven wasn't involved I couldn't do it. Once he did get involved, I didn't give it another thought :P It might be a while before we get to those secrets, but we'll get around to them.
Lol, everybody hates Michael :P Someone told me recently that they couldn't trust him because he's in the sacrificing virgins to Satan business. Poor guy just can't win xD I'm still not completely sure when Snow will discover the truth about Michael and Mary, but I don't think it will be for a while yet. I've got a lot of other things to deal with and I need Snow to not have murdered Michael until after that :P You're right that it will completely destroy Snow's image of him and her trust in him. Without giving anything away, it will take Snow to a very dark place when she finds out what he did to Mary. She trusts him almost completely at this point so give her a good amount of time to develop a close friendship with him or even something deeper... it won't be pretty, let's put it that way. Don't worry though, your patience will be greatly rewarded xD I'm confident that Snow's first emotion will be absolute rage and Michael will get his just rewards for that. I don't think she'd kill him, but he may wish she had once she's finished with him xD Thanks for commenting :D
September 22, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 33 Reply
Okay, I have a solo essay to write, a group essay with a partner I have to nag into submission and a test to study for, but instead I’m going to sit here and read this chapter and procrastinate the night away. I hate myself :P
Anyway, unlike Ariana, I’m not so sure if Snow’s judgment can be trusted on the Michael front (sorry, Snow :P). I mean, I don’t think Michael’s evil (and not just because I don’t believe in that word :P) but he’s clearly capable of doing bad things to achieve his goals… And while I do semi-trust that he won’t do anything to hurt Snow, I definitely don’t trust him with anyone else xD And she has been wrong about people before (Sara – although I don’t think she was a ‘bad person’ either, she definitely wasn’t as great as Snow thought she was), so I’ll definitely be keeping a wary eye on him. Hopefully Kayla and Ariana will be too :P
Anyway Michael as usual doesn’t disappoint with his creepiness :P I really hope Snow sees sense and doesn’t rush into things with him, but… Well, let's just say I’m preparing myself for the opposite to happen. I feel really, really bad for her though, because I know how much she’ll be hurt later on when she finds out about Mary… :’( :’( Their age difference really squicks me out too. I feel bad and judgemental but I can’t help it xD Maybe it’s because every time I think of their ten year age difference I automatically think of my eldest brother, because he’s ten years older than me. And that makes me even more creeped out by Michael than I already am, even though he bears no relation to Snow so I’m unfairly judging him in that sense. Although I don’t know. Maybe they are secretly related :P Conspiracy theories are fun.
Anyway, the ending of the chapter was probably my favourite part. Firstly, JTG has decided to involve Sophia… Eep. I hope she’ll be okay. Secondly, her text was very interesting… She makes it sound like one person killed both of them. But then that doesn’t fit with Snow and Co.’s recollection of Miranda’s death, unless Sara killed herself which I don’t really see happening. Although I could be wrong. Still, perhaps they were wrong and someone else was behind Miranda’s death… Or maybe JTG’s just trolling and a separate person killed each of them.
Also, this Founder’s Day event thingy sounds ominous. Something tells me some shenanigans will go down there…
September 29, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Lol, I'll take no blame for any bad grades. No blame at all, I say :P Regardless, thanks for the comment xD On the subject of Snow's judgment when it comes to Michael, you're probably right. In fact, the same could be said for Snow's judgment of pretty much anyone. As you say, she has a history of being wrong about people. She isn't always the best when it comes to reading people. She thinks she is, but hopefully one day she'll realize she isn't. Ariana, on the other hand, is a fantastic people reader. It's a trait Snow sadly didn't get from her mother. Kayla and Ariana will definitely keep a close watch on him, no worries there. I mean, have you met Kayla? Michael will be lucky if she doesn't hire a private investigator to follow him around town :P
Haha, poor Michael just can't win xD I tried to make him less creepy than usual this time around, which might have made him seem even more creepy, now that I think about it. Ah well, he's just a creepy guy. There's only so much help I can give him :P Their age difference is a disturbing thing, no reason to feel bad about it. Snow is very much an underage girl and Michael is decidedly not. The idea of their relationship was partially inspired (as so many things in this are :P) by Aria and Ezra from Pretty Little Liars. They have one of the longest lasting relationships on that show, and yet when they started dating Ezra was Aria's high school English teacher so there's a pretty big age difference between them. Those two have always kind of creeped me out, so him being so much older just made Michael that much more creepy. Lol, if there were a convincing way for JTG to trick Snow and Michael into thinking they were brother and sister, I would absolutely do it xD Almost seems like something JTG would do just to screw with them :P
I hadn't really planned to involve Sophia directly in the JTG plot any time soon, but I was hit with the idea of getting other characters involved in different ways that aren't about using secrets to hurt people. JTG is actually appearing to be a friend, someone that's trying to anonymously help Sophia solve her case and Miranda's murder, which she didn't even realize needed to be solved. JTG won't be trying to hurt her like she is the others. She's got other, more insidious plans for Sophia. Anyway, I wouldn't take anything that comes from a JTG message at face value. She's a master at lying and manipulation. JTG could, in theory, make the girls take the fall for Sara's murder as well as Miranda's or something like that. Or she could have just been trying to say something clever to grab Sophia's attention :P Whatever her plans, never believe anything JTG says... most of the time xD
Oh, there will be shenanigans, trust me :P All sorts of shenanigans.
September 29, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 34 Reply
It was really nice to see Jacob go home at last. I’d almost forgotten he was still in the hospital, what with everything else that’s been going on. I feel sorry for him though, not only because he’s paralysed but because he has to go home without hi sister… :( Poor guy. As for Jacob possibly being JTG… I don’t know. I don’t think he is – I mean, I can’t really see JTG saying out loud something that could lead to Snow and Co. drawing a conclusion that they were JTG. Surely even she can’t be that much of a troll :P If JTG is a single person, then I think it’s a coincidence, but if JTG is multiple people I guess I could see Jacob being one of them. I don’t think it’s likely, but it’s possible I suppose. Especially since, it’s pretty clear (in my opinion, anyway, and I could be completely wrong xD) that JTG must have some sort of supernatural power… After all, I don’t see how else she could’ve made all the pasta into those three letters :P I mean, if she didn’t that would take her absolutely forever to do, and even then she wouldn’t be sure Snow would be the one to eat it, so some sort of supernatural ability seems undeniable now. Either that, or she has way too much time on her hands xD
Poor Mary :( I felt awful for her throughout this chapter, more so than usual. She seems so isolated and alone right now, at a time when she really needs not to feel that way, with the Michael thing and JTG stalking them. I do wonder if one of them, not Snow but hopefully Nikki or Clara, will figure out that Mary must know something about Michael that she’s not saying. Particularly given she was texted whilst trying to turn Snow away from him, if I were them I would immediately suspect it was JTG instead of Emily xD But then, who knows? They both went off to join Snow in the end, so perhaps they do just think Mary’s being irrational. I really wish someone would give her a hug :’( She really needs one, I think, but I don’t think she’s likely to get one.
Speaking of Michael, he continues to be creepy :P At least he doesn’t disappoint. I always know what to expect from him xD I’m happy Ariana showed him what he’ll be dealing with if he tries anything though. Not that I really think he’d do anything to Snow, it’s the others I’m worried about, but… Like Snow says, it makes me hopeful that if somehow Ariana and Kayla find out about JTG, their wrath will be enough to stop her xD Or at least be very helpful in stopping her.
That ending… Eeep. For some reason I’m imagining that scene for The Phantom of the Opera, where the Phantom makes the chandelier swing and stuff and then that guy gets hanged. I don’t know why that was the first thing that popped into my mind when reading what they (presumably JTG, but I’ll keep my options open) were buying xD I’m not even sure if that’s exactly how that scene went, it’s been so long since I saw the musical. Anyway, I hope nobody gets hanged.
One thing I thought was odd, was when Michael and Snow arrived at the hospital and Clara noted that Mary was glaring at him like he was pond scum. Considering what he did to her I would’ve thought she’d be more submissive, I suppose you could say. I would’ve expect her to look away and avoid looking at him, or something like that, rather than glaring at him. I don’t know, I just think that would be a more natural reaction if she’s afraid of him.
October 22, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :) To be completely honest, I'd forgotten about Jacob a little myself :P I'd mentioned a while back that he was supposed to be getting out of the hospital on Saturday, but I was halfway through the chapter and he wasn't in it. I ended up having to do a pretty major rewrite due to my forgetfulness xD Jacob is facing a pretty tough new reality going back home now. He hasn't really had to face the world since Sara's death, so combine that with his injuries and he's going to have a pretty rough time. Lol never underestimate JTG's trollishness :P Sometimes in plain sight is the best place to hide something, right? Okay, so maybe it's a little bit too obvious but that could be exactly what JTG wants. Either that or she just got really lucky and Jacob accidentally sent them on a wild goose chase :P Hahaha, JTG has way too much time on her hands either way xD She's giving up valuable time when she could be doing normal people stuff to stalk high school girls. But if she doesn't have supernatural powers, can you imagine how many bags of pasta she had to buy to pull that off? Mistbrook Falls would be facing a massive pasta shortage :P Although it's possible JTG is just doing creepy things like that to all of them in the hopes it pays off. Snow might want to clean out her cupboard :P
I know :( I was really horrible to Mary in this chapter. She really does need a hug. I felt bad being so cruel, but it had to be done. Mary being isolated is exactly what JTG wants, of course. Well, not Mary specifically, but all of them. Their friendship, their love for each other is their greatest strength. They're completely alone in this against JTG. If JTG can break that bond, even if it takes a long time, would be worth it. It's not necessarily JTG's main goal, more a weapon to use against them. As for the other girls, for the moment they agree with Snow and think Mary is being irrational about Michael. They've got no evidence to the contrary, so that's what they're sticking with. Even so, they could always change their minds as time goes on and they spend more time around Michael.
Well, at least Michael can be praised for his consistency xD But yes, Ariana's watching Snow's back where Michael is concerned. Her vengeance would be swift and complete if he ever hurts Snow. You know, it's so far in the future that I don't even know if Ariana and Kayla will find out about JTG in time to bring their considerable resources down against her. I haven't really thought too much about it since if they find out too soon they can finance a private army to hunt JTG down :P On the other hand, it would be fun to see JTG on the defensive. So far, she's always attacking. I'm not sure how she'd respond to playing defense.
And now I want to go see The Phantom of the Opera again :P Eh, I've got some free time this weekend... why do I get the feeling I'm going to end up buying theatre tickets tonight? xD I vaguely remember the scene you're talking about, but I can't recall the specifics either. It's been ages since I've seen it too, so I don't remember but... well, let's just say the gang won't be having much fun on Halloween. I don't know if anyone will be hung, but I don't think anyone will be escaping without a few scars.
You don't know how happy I am that you brought up Mary's reaction. My sister and I debated it for a while and we couldn't decide which way was best. We kept bouncing back and forth between whether Mary should be afraid of Michael or if she should be more aggressive since she wants Snow far away from him. It was sort of a question of what would be at the forefront of Mary's mind, her fear or her desire to protect her friend. I wrote both versions of the scene and eventually went with this one, but I can't say I've been completely satisfied with it and I know I want to go back and rework it. I want two completely conflicting emotions at the same time. Hmm, conflicting emotions, now there's an idea. She could react with fear but on the inside wish she could show him exactly how he felt... which would require a POV change... Well, I'm probably not going to go to bed now like I planned :P I'm having ideas and I'll never go to sleep if I don't at least start.
October 22, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 35 Reply
Poor Steven :( :( :( I feel so bad for him. I definitely didn’t expect Sara’s money to have come from him (or any of the gang, really), much less that she blackmailed him in such a cruel way into giving her all that. I thought she got it from selling drugs or something xD I’ve watched too much Breaking Bad, that much is clear. I really wonder what she was going to do with all that money. I really have no idea what it could’ve been for, at the moment. There’s still a lot about her that’s a complete mystery and I really hope we find out more soon, but I’m not very confident that’ll happen :P I’m sure she’ll remain a mystery for a good while longer xD
Brad’s story was sad :( It was interesting to learn more about him. I wonder what sort of stuff his mother was into – was it something fairly mundane (like drugs, which was admittedly my first reaction… Yep, way too much Breaking Bad xD) or something more magical? I found Karen rather interesting too. I’m not sure why, but she seemed fairly emphasized for a minor character (and she plays/played trombone! Tromb players unite! :P) so I’m wondering if she’ll have an important role in the future.
Noooo, Snow. Why???? :( I can’t say I didn’t expect her and Michael to become a couple sooner rather than later, but I’m really worried all the same. I just feel really sad for her, because I know she’s going to be really hurt and the more she falls for him the worse it’ll be :/ Still, at least Snow knows that Romeo and Juliet aren’t a couple to aspire too xD That’s something that doesn’t happen often enough in my opinion. Anyway, although I’m really frightened for Snow now she and Michael are officially a couple, it’s definitely an interesting turn of events and writing-wise a good decision.
Anyway, that ending was definitely the most surprising part of the chapter :P I was expecting Emilia to be involved with something nefarious, but I was more thinking she’d be part of the JTG side of things. Of course, she still could be, but I didn’t think she’d know about whatever her dad and that other guy are up to. Still, her apparent magic powers/magic lip gloss/whatever are very interesting… It’s certainly a very likely explanation for how she managed to seduce Jackson. I’m also curious because Snow said her lips tasted liked strawberries, and Kayla was always saying that Ariana smelled/tasted like strawberries… I wonder if there’s a supernatural connection there or something xD Or perhaps I’m just reading too far into things. That's probably more likely.
One thing I thought, is that Snow’s reaction to Steven telling her he was gay was a little lacking. I mean, since he said it was really hard for him to say and no-one knew about it and his parents wouldn’t understand, etc., I would expect her to reassure him about that specifically as well as Sara using his secret to blackmail him into giving her ten grand. I don’t know, for me that part just felt like something was missing. Anyway, aside from that I thought this was a really good chapter. I wonder if Emilia and Co. will actually be able to find and kill Zoe (her name is Zoe, right? Now I think about it I’m not sure, but Zoe seems right xD). I guess Snow really must be “the one” they keep talking about for them to comment like that… I guess that’s yet another thing I have to worry about ;)
November 1, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting :D Yeah, Steven... that whole thing really just shows what type of person Sara was. Whatever her reasons, what she did was very cruel. This more than anything has really ruined Snow's vision of Sara. She's realized that the person she thought Sara was never existed and she never knew. I wasn't really planning on revealing that so soon since we won't, I'm sorry to say, be learning much more about Sara and what she wanted the money for in the near future. It just kind of fit in here pretty well, so there it is. Oh, but there's no such thing as too much Breaking Bad xD
To be completely fair, I very nearly forgot about needing to tell Brad's story :P I knew he and Sophia were supposed to have their date, but I meant to do it a little earlier and since I'm fast approaching a time jump I couldn't put it off any longer so I had to slot it in here. You're on the right track with Brad's mom. She was involved with drugs and some other things that took her to a really bad place, so see? Not too much Breaking Bad :P Oh, Karen xD I don't really know if she'll pop up again or not. I like to give minor characters quite a bit of detail sometimes, just to hopefully make the town feel a bit more alive. Or she could be JTG and she's mad at the gang because they can all play instruments well and she can't :P Okay, that's probably not true but at least you found her interesting.
Much like Steven and Sara's money, and I was never completely sure when Snow and Michael would become a couple. I knew they would at some point, but I never knew exactly when. Honestly, the whole thing makes me nervous. It's a relationship that I know no one is going to cheer for, which is a strange thing to write since you usually want people to like the coupling but whatever. I did it to myself xD But yes, the longer they're together and the more she comes to care for him, the worse it'll be when she finds out the truth. In the interim, though, Michael has a chance to prove himself to her. Whether or not that'll help when she finds out remains to be seen. Heh, Romeo and Juliet. No, no, never look to them for a quality relationship :P Anyway, I'm glad you think it's interesting and a good decision because I'm still nervous xD
Like a lot of other things in this chapter, I didn't plan on revealing Emilia's big secret just yet but when looking for a way to end the chapter I thought it would be a fun way to wrap things up. But yes, it's quite possible Emilia used her evil powers to seduce Jackson, which is kind of bad for Snow since Jackson would be innocent if seduced by magic. Snow would be the only one did something bad of her own accord. Not to ruin any theories, but the strawberries thing is really just because I... well, I like strawberries and strawberry lip gloss :P Its a good theory, though. I can't say I'm intuitive enough to have noticed that.
I think I focused way too much on the idea I had which was that Snow really wouldn't care that Steven was gay. I kept thinking about how that wouldn't affect her because she would just accept him as he is, as her friend, and move on, but while that's great of her it is pretty silly that she didn't comfort him about something that's clearly very difficult for him. I'll fix that because you're right; it really does feel like something's missing :) With Zoe (yes, her name is Zoe :P I was just writing a scene with her and I had to go back and make sure her name was, in fact, Zoe xD I'm bad and I know it) even if Emilia and her cohorts can figure out Zoe's who they're looking for, she's... let's just say she's more than capable of protecting herself if need be. I wouldn't be too worried about Zoe just yet. Snow, though... yeah, you might want to worry about her a little bit ;)
November 1, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 36 Reply
Sorry for taking so long to get to this X.X I’ve wanted to read it for ages, and I finally finished my exams yesterday so at last I’m free again <3 Anyway, this chapter just left me more confused than ever on the Michael front xD I really don’t know what to think of him right now :P I mean, he seems nice, and he seems to really care about Snow. I do believe Zoe when she says he loves her, but… He’s still creepy xD I don’t know, even without the Mary thing, he just has this vibe of creepiness. Still, at least Snow and Michael are taking their relationship slowly. That’s something, at least. In a way though, I suppose it doesn’t make much of a difference. She’s still falling for him :/
Zoe’s comments about JTG left me very curious. The fact she called JTG a him before Michael corrected her makes me wonder if that’s a hint to JTG’s true identity. After all, I wouldn’t be surprised if Zoe knew exactly who he/she was and stuff. But maybe she really did just make a mistake and you’re just trolling me xD Still, considering Zoe called them mortals and stuff perhaps that means that JTG doesn’t have any magical powers of any kind. If that’s true, it makes her even scarier, in a way, because that means she spent a lot more time and effort into everything in this chapter and the alphabet soup and just everything else than she would’ve if she was magical. But then, she could still be magical, despite what Zoe said. I mean there are some things that seem really difficult to do without magical help, so maybe JTG does have access to magical powers of some sort (and perhaps they don’t belong to her) and Zoe doesn’t know about it.
Moving, the second part of the chapter was definitely… shocking, I suppose you could say. I’m sorry, I know that was terrible xD Anyway, in all seriousness, everything that happened was horrible :( The part with Mary and Snow was really well-written and scary, and although I didn’t really expect Snow to die I was still quite relieved when she turned out to be okay. The second test was just as frightening as the first, perhaps even more so. It really proves how far JTG will go :/ And even though Clara and the rest gave in eventually, they still held out for an incredibly long time and I’m proud of them. I really hope they’ll be able to bounce back from this quickly, but it seems unlikely. JTG’s back, and as Snow said, she’s worse than ever before :/
Still, after this chapter it does seem more likely that JTG is a group of people, or one person with a group of people at her disposal, because otherwise I don’t see how she could have overcome them all like that. Also, I wonder why Steven was the only one out of the guys who got knocked out. Was it just because he was closest to the girls when they were knocked out or is there another reason? It’s very curious… I wonder why she chose Mary, too, for the first test. I mean, Snow makes sense since JTG appears to be most fixated on her, but Mary… I suppose it’s probably because Mary’s been ostracising herself from the rest of the group, and perhaps JTG wanted to test how far apart she and Snow had become over the Michael thing.
Anyway, overall this was a really good and scary chapter. I’m glad no-one died, but I’m still feeling really nervous. I hope they have some sort of victory over JTG soon, even if it’s just a small one. I mean, in the war with JTG they’re losing pretty badly, but surely there’s only one to go from here. Up! Sorry for the cheesiness, by the way xD It’s way too late for my tired brain :P
November 20, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment, and please, take your time :) Congrats on finishing your exams! I hope everything went well. Michael is ever a source of confusion, isn't he? :P But if that's the case, then he's doing his job perfectly well. I've never wanted him to be obviously good or bad. There's good things about him and then really horrible things too. His concern and love for Snow are genuine and he's telling the truth when he says he'll do whatever he has to do to protect her, but that doesn't stop him from also being a creepy, cradle-robbing rapist. That could change once all of his secrets come out, but then again that could just make it worse xD
I'll not say anything about whether or not Zoe's comment was accidental or if she knows everything. Nope, not a word :P Zoe couldn't say even if she does know. The Coven typically don't involve themselves in the affairs of non-witches, and even if JTG does have magical powers she isn't a witch. So unless she does something with magic that's just crazy evil or otherwise draws the attention of the Coven, they aren't likely to get involved with her. And JTG definitely doesn't want to draw the attention of the Coven xD The Witches' Coven are the supreme magical authority and they have a division of trained warriors that they send to hunt down rogue witches/magical evildoers. You don't want to have one of them coming to get you :P So JTG could definitely still be magical in some form, but Zoe and the Coven aren't remotely interested in her. Yet.
Hahahahahaha xD Shocking xD I love it :P JTG made a similar joke a couple of chapters back and she made no apologies about it. I'm glad you liked the bit with Snow and Mary. That was a last minute addition and like anything I throw in at the last second, it makes me a little nervous. I would have loved the end the chapter right there, but it was pretty obvious that Snow wasn't going to die so it would have been pretty pointless. The second test, much like the first, was a test of the girl's friendship and devotion to each other. JTG wanted to know if they would ever turn on each other and if so, how long would it take? What lengths would she have to go to in order to make them hurt each other? As for bouncing back quickly, the girls will all process what happened very differently. Some of them will look on the positives in that, like you say, they held on for a long time before giving in. Snow, I think, will have a tough time of it. She's really beginning to lose hope at this point and if something doesn't change she's about to start to crack.
There's a reason why Steven was the only one of the guys that got attacked, but since JTG isn't telling and Steven doesn't know we won't be finding out why for a while. But there definitely was a reason for it. As far Mary, you're right. She picked Mary specifically because she thinks Mary is the weakest link in the group. She's already been withdrawing from the others, so JTG thought it might be a place she could possibly split up their friendship. Pity it didn't work :P Hehe, the Michael thing, the Mary thing, the Miranda thing... I do believe I sense a pattern :P That, and I've got too many characters whose names start with M's.
Oho, they could definitely still go further down :P JTG could start killing people, after all. But... well... maybe they could get a little bit of a victory before too long. It is about time something goes their way, but then again it could be said that your nervous feeling is very well deserved xD Dark times are coming.
November 20, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 37 Reply
:’( Poor Ariana… It’s so sad to see her slowly getting sicker and sicker. I can only imagine how horrible that must be for Kayla, to have to watch her go through this illness and be unable to help in any substantial way. I’m glad the topic of telling Snow came up again though. I was starting to wonder when it would. I’m worried about how she’ll react. Obviously in a normal situation it would be horrible for her to hear her mother’s dying, but she’s already dealing with so much… She’s so shell-shocked and broken already, I’m worried about how far she’ll fall when she learns the truth. Although I do want Kayla and Ariana to tell Snow since she deserves to know, I’m still dreading that chapter because I know how depressing it’ll be :’(
I really liked Snow and Mary’s conversation. It was heartwarming, but really sad at the same time :( I was glad to see Snow dispel Mary’s fears that her friends would turn against her, but at the same time it makes me sad that Mary seems to blame herself for disliking Michael… She shouldn’t have to find a way to be okay with him, and it saddens me that she feels that way :( Even so, it’s heartwarming that she knows Snow (and Clara and Nikki) really do love her and won’t leave her alone. I think she really needed to hear that, and hopefully it’ll help her gain some confidence as well.
Sara’s reappearance was very interesting as well. I’m really curious about what she is. She’s obviously more than a ghost, since she was able to move that drawer and everything. It seems to me like she’s a Guide, or something like it anyway. I’m not too sure, though. I mean, Guides are the only thing I know about. For all I know there’s a tonne of positions dead people can have to help the living. Perhaps Sara’s one of those, or something else entirely.
Moving on, I’m also curious about what she was looking for. My first thought is that she’s looking for the money, and since Snow took it out she can’t find it. Perhaps even though she’s a Guide/spirit/whatever she’s still working on whatever it was she was involved in before she died. Maybe she wanted the money so she could use it, but since Snow gave it back to Steven it’s not there anymore. That’s my theory for the moment, anyway xD Still, I am curious to see what they’ll find if they search through the rest of Sara’s stuff. As for Miranda’s parents, I’m curious to see how that’ll go as well. I’d never really considered them before, but Snow is right in that they could potentially be involved. And even if they’re not, they could have some interesting insights on Miranda and what Sara knew about her. Anyway, overall this was a really good chapter and I’m really nervous to see what happens next.
December 10, 2015 | Genevieve Middleton
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Yeah, it's really tough for Kayla. It's pretty much Kayla's worst nightmare. She's always been so focused on protecting Ariana and she's faced with something that she can't fight. She just has to sit back and watch and she hates that. Watching Ariana just waste away is the worst thing Kayla can imagine. The biggest reason Snow hasn't been told already is because when she finds out the story is going to make a pretty big shift and I had a long list of plot points that I had to hit before that shift could happen. I've finally wrapped up all of those points, so expect that chapter to come up really, really soon. It's the last thing I want to write because I'll be an inconsolable emotional wreck by the time I'm done, but I got myself into this mess and I've put it off as long as I can. In fact, I'm just about to start working on that chapter now. It isn't the next one, but I want to take a lot of time with it and get it right.
I'm glad you liked Mary and Snow's chat :) Mary has her reasons for choosing to be okay with Michael and she didn't exactly share them with Snow. There will be more about it when we get back to her POV, but mainly she's decided that she's not going to let Michael bother her anymore. She very nearly died a couple of hours earlier and she's decided she won't let Michael ruin her friendships or anything else. She's come to believe that Michael isn't going to hurt Snow, so she's not too worried about them being together at this point. He's obviously had plenty of opportunities to harm her if he wanted to and after seeing the way her reacted when Snow was in danger influenced her opinion of him. She still hates him and if it were up to her she'd never lay eyes on him again, but she's done being afraid of him. She doesn't want him to have that power over her anymore and she refuses to let him. JTG already has power over her, but Michael doesn't have to. That realization, and as you say learning that her friends are firmly by her side, will certainly help with her confidence.
I do love Sara's little appearances :P Sara could still technically be a ghost, she could be a poltergeist after all xD I really, really, really want to explain what Sara is. I can't even explain how much I want to get to that, but I've already planned out when that will be revealed and it isn't for a good long while yet. I can't/won't rework the story so I can reveal it earlier, so I must wait. But hopefully what Sara is will be worth the wait.
Sara hid a lot of stuff, it's what she did. There's plenty of stuff of Sara's that they haven't searched, so there's plenty of chances for them to find something important. Or not :P Sara had a lot of useless crap xD Miranda's parents (as if I didn't already have enough characters :P I haven't introduced Mary's family because I'm already juggling too many characters) will hopefully prove interesting. They know things about Miranda and definitely some of the things Sara knew. They may not be open to talking about any of it, but like everyone else, they've got secrets of their own. Thanks for the comment!
December 10, 2015 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 38 Reply
This chapter made me very happy xD I wasn’t expecting to find out the stuff revealed in it anytime soon so I’m pleasantly surprised. Also, I’ve been feeling rather negatively towards Sara, particularly after finding out what she did to Steven, so it was nice to have a chapter with her POV again. It was good to be reminded that even though she was very manipulative and did some really bad things, she was just a teenage girl. It was nice (although sad) to learn a tiny bit more about her father’s death as well. It really humanised her for me, as did the fact she seemed to feel remorse for killing Miranda. It was interesting to learn that she didn’t plan to kill her all along. I’ll admit, a part of me was leaning in that direction. I’m not sure, I just got that vibe, but obviously it was not the right one xD Anyway, I really wonder what Miranda did to make Sara say she deserved what she got, though. Was it just general nastiness or something specific? Or both? :P
I was happy to find out that Sara did know about JTG as well. That was something I expected, but even so it was good to have confirmation. I feel sorry for Sara, having to deal with JTG’s stalking without the support of Snow and the others for such a long time :( Still, although Snow and Co. seem convinced at the end, I’m still not really sure if JTG was the one who killed her. I mean, it’s certainly possible, even likely after this chapter, but then Sara’s ghosty thing did say that she didn’t think JTG and her killer were the same people in the last chapter. Maybe something happened with JTG that makes her think JTG wasn’t her murderer. It’s definitely possible that they’re connected though. Or maybe I’m wrong and they’re right and JTG did murder her.
I’m curious about Miranda’s parents, even more so now than I was before. I’m very suspicious of them, particularly since I found out Miranda’s stepfather is called Tony and I have a very strong distrust of people named Tony :P Anyway, I’m really looking forward to seeing how their meeting with her parents goes. At the very least, it’ll provide some interesting insights into what Miranda herself was like. I wonder who Sara was talking to after she found that note from JTG, too. At the moment I think they might be Steven, simply because he was talking to her before and it would make sense. If it is Steven, I wonder why she asked him for help and no-one else. But I’m not even close to being certain about that, because it could just as likely refer to someone else that hasn’t appeared or hasn’t had their secrets revealed yet :P Still, for now my hunch is on Steven.
And by the way, I liked the part when Sara said she’s set the world on fire for Snow xD I don’t know if it actually means anything but I thought it was a cool reference to JTG’s various shenanigans with the song.
January 4, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting :) I'm glad this chapter made you happy because this was not at all the chapter I planned on writing. The chapter this one was supposed to be apparently didn't want to be written, so this one became the substitute. I wasn't planning on revealing any of this stuff yet, especially whether or not Miranda's death was accidental or not. Keeping that a secret gave Sara a lot more moral ambiguity than she has now, but as you say Sara was coming off as a completely horrible person and she wasn't. She did a lot of really terrible things, but yeah she was still just a teenage girl so I'm glad Sara was humanized a little bit. Oh, and the reason Sara felt that Miranda deserved what she got is definitely both :P
Much like everything else, I hadn't planned to reveal that Sara knew about JTG for a long time. Until the very end of the story, in fact. Honestly, Sara has more secrets than any other character and since it's obviously pretty hard to do POV chapters with her its tough to reveal stuff only she knew so I planned to do it all in one shot. That said, there are only so many secrets I can hold onto before I screw up and forget something so Sara knowing about JTG was sacrificed for the sake of my waning mental capabilities :P Well, Sara (or whatever keeps popping up looking like Sara) doesn't really know who killed her or who JTG is. Sara does, however, know things about JTG that the others don't yet know so she may well have her reasons for thinking JTG isn't her murderer. Snow is desperate for clues and answers and she feels she's found something that's solid so she's going to latch onto it.
Hahahaha, poor Tony :P He's mistrusted before he even appears. Then again, maybe there's a good reason for that. What? I didn't say anything. Nope, nothing at all xD Who Sara called is certainly someone who hasn't had their secrets revealed yet. That could still apply to Steven since he's sure to have more secrets than he's revealed so far. Most everyone does :P The person she called is someone whose secrets she knows and who she isn't concerned about getting involved in something potentially dangerous. Of course, she didn't know to what lengths JTG is willing to go and the real danger she and anyone she tells is in. At the moment though, Steven is as good a guess as any. No, I'm not saying any more than that :P
Lol, I have a lot of fun doing little things like that. Does the reference mean anything? Maybe :P Probably not, but it always could and I find that strangely fun for some reason. Just the possibility that some small little reference could link something together adds to the mystery a bit.
January 4, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 39 Reply
Well it’s nice to see that one good thing came out of JTG torturing them. I was proud to see how Mary has decided not to let Michael scare her anymore. It’s something I feel would’ve been really hard for her to do, no matter what happened, so it’s good to see. She's choosing not to let him have that power over her and that requires a significant amount of courage. I wonder how long it will be before Michael and Emily’s motives are revealed though. I want to see if I’m right :P I havea feeling it'll still be a long while. Although now I've said that it'll probably be in the next couple of chapters, won't it xD Oh well, a girl can dream.
Now, as for breaking into Miranda’s parents’ house… Personally, I think it’s a good idea. After all, if they’re hiding something they’re hardly going to tell a group of teenagers, especially if they are JTG. I don’t think they are, but I’m not ruling out a connection of some kind. If anything, they’ll know about Miranda and what she was like and that’s something I really want to find out. I am curious to see how JTG will react too. I guess it depends on whether Miranda’s parents are connected to JTG or not. If they are, I’m really worried about what she might do :/ But then, if they’re not, I guess she might not care all that much. It’s hard to judge at this present point xD I really hope they do end up breaking in and learn some interesting info though. I need more :P
Aww, Fluffers :( His death was really sad for me. After all, he’s been there right from the beginning. If I’m sad I can’t imagine what Ariana’s going through, especially since her cat died on top of the fact she has to tell her daughter she herself is dying :/ I’m really scared to read the next chapter, but I’ll force myself to do it anyway because even though I know it’s going to be really depressing I need to know what happens.
January 22, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :) This is definitely a turning point for Mary. So far, she's been a bit of a wallflower. She's been scared of Michael and hasn't had an ounce of self-confidence and now that's going to start to change a bit. She's found an inner strength after what JTG did to them and that allowed her to move past what Michael and Emily did. Personally, I think Mary has moved from being the weakest link in the group to being the strongest. With Snow sidelined a bit by everything else she's dealing with, Mary suddenly has room to shine and really come into her own. As for when Michael and Emily's motives will be revealed... well, I kind of want to hold onto that until Snow herself finds out. I'm pretty sure if she found out about Michael right now she'd literally go insane. There's only so much the poor girl can take. I could reveal what their reasons were in another way, but I've had this idea of how it will all come to light and I really don't want to change that. So, yeah, it probably will be a while before that comes out unless I change my mind :P
Breaking into Miranda's parents' house is definitely a high risk/potentially no reward endeavor. I'd be just as worried about what JTG might do in either event. If Miranda's parents are not JTG, JTG would still likely know what they had done and then have one more secret to hold over them. But if they are JTG, they could find everything they need to put a stop to all this. Then, of course, JTG would have absolutely nothing to lose and everything to gain by taking all of them down. Either way, there's plenty of opportunity to find some information about Miranda. Miranda, like Sara, knew how to hide things. Luckily, the gang seems to know how to find stuff that people want to stay hidden.
I really hate myself for killing Fluffers, I really do :( Coop didn't hurt me as badly and that's saying something. I knew all along that Fluffers would die, although it was originally part of a plan that also included the destruction of the warehouse. It would all have been a bit symbolic of Ariana's own imminent death. Everything she loved, everything that's deeply connected to her would die in the lead up to her own death. In the end, I couldn't destroy the warehouse (I need it for stuff :P) but with Fluffers I wanted to stick with my original plan even if I hate myself for it.
January 22, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 40 Reply
Noooo :( :( :( I knew it was coming and I think it’s great that Ariana finally told Snow, but even so, this chapter was so depressing :( Poor Snow. I really don’t know how she’s going to deal with this, on top of everything else that’s happening. It’s the absolute last thing she needs (well, it’s the last thing anyone needs, really) but at the same time I think it’s good she finally knows. At least now she’ll have time to hopefully process what’s going to happen before it does, although I’m not sure if that will ever help. Ariana will still be gone either way :(
Anyway, the emotional impact of this chapter was really powerful and made me very teary-eyed. Snow’s anger and grief was conveyed really well and felt very real. The scene where Kayla comforted her was my favourite. Now more than ever, they’ve got to stick together and be strong, both for themselves and for Ariana as she goes through this hard time, so it was really heartwarming in a sad way to see them starting to do that.
I don’t know what else to say. I’m too depressed L Still, I’ve been anticipating this chapter for a long time and overall I think you did a really great job with it. It was just as depressing and emotional as I expected it to be and left me with a feeling of hopelessness. Ariana’s illness seems so much more real now Snow knows, for some reason. Those final lines were really powerful too. I really liked the fact there was snowfall, as well – was that a deliberate bit of symbolism or am I just reading into things too much? xD Anyway, I’m really worried for Snow, more than ever before. I don’t see how she’s going to be able to deal with this on top of everything else. It’s just too much.
January 22, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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So yeah, this chapter. Like you said, I knew it was coming too but I did not want to write it at all. I hate myself for this too, but it had to happen :P It was long past time and I had no more excuses to put it off. I've been really depressed since I finished this and I haven't been able to convince myself to start the next chapter yet. For Snow, this is pretty much her worst nightmare on top of everything else she's been dealing with. This has absolutely devastated her and I've always had the idea in the back of my mind that the Snow we knew up to this point essentially died the moment she found out. She's been slowly torn down since the beginning and this is kind of the last nail in her coffin so to speak. Every bit of her perfect little world she lived in at the start has been destroyed and that in turn destroyed her. How she deals with that and who she becomes now is going to be a major focus for the near future.
I'm glad the emotional impact and Snow's grief were both okay. I kept changing things and changing things and it never felt as powerful and painful as I envisioned, but eventually I had to let it go. This is really terrible to say, but I'm glad you were left with a hopeless feeling at the end. Okay, I know, but hear me out :P I was aiming to leave people at the same place and with some of the same feelings that Snow has. She's lost all hope at this point and I wanted to convey that as best as I could. So, yay xD I'm glad you liked the bit with Kayla comforting Snow as well. It's definitely outside of Kayla's comfort zone, but she's surprisingly good at it even though she thinks she's terrible and has no idea what she's doing.
The snowfall at the end was definitely symbolic of what's happening to Snow, so you're not just reading into things. That was the only thing I knew for certain about this chapter was that it would take place almost entirely while it was snowing. Ever since I settled on that picture for the cover, I knew that scene would be out in the snow. That's one of the reasons I couldn't let Snow find out about Ariana before now. It was too early in the year for snow to be falling in the amounts I wanted. Your concern for Snow is certainly justified, I'll just say that. I think things are sure to get worse for her before they start to get better.
January 22, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 41 Reply
Poor, poor Snow :( The way she’s acting and everything she’s feeling makes me want to give her a hug and never let go. You portrayed her downward spiral in a realistic and heartbreaking way and I’m really worried about her. At the moment, I really don’t see how she’s going to go on from this. So much has happened, so much heartbreak and secrets and stalking and torture, and I don’t have much hope. She’s so shattered, and even though Michael wants to help her through it, he’s only going to make it worse in the end when his secret about Mary comes to light :/ He worries me the most, I think. I do (begrudgingly :P) believe him when he says he loves Snow, but… He’s creepy xD No matter what he does, he just has that vibe.
Anyway, I’m worried about what he’s going to do in his attempts to help Snow. I don’t really see what else he could do to try and help Ariana (and by extension Snow) other than look for more magical ways. Unless he donates a fortune to some cancer research company, but that’s hardly a guarantee that she'll be saved so it doesn’t seem all that likely. I suppose he could do that on top of more magical research though. Anyway, if he does find some magical way to cure Ariana, I’m sure it won’t come free. And depending on what the consequences are, will it be worth it? Not that Ariana's life isn't worth a lot, I'm just sure Ariana herself wouldn’t want to be saved if the cost was great (like someone else dying, or something like that), so… Yeah, I don’t quite know what to expect from Michael when he says he won’t rest ‘til Snow finds peace. I’m worried because he definitely seems like the type of person who’ll do anything to accomplish his goals, no matter what it is. I was glad to see Kayla there at the end though. She reassures me that Michael will have to face some form of justice for what he’s done at some point xD I'm so vindictive :P
Anyway, I really liked reading Michael and Zoe’s conversation. I’m immensely curious about everything they talked about xD But first and foremost, I’m wondering who this Princess Sienna is. Mostly I wonder if she’s someone else in disguise… I don’t know if she’s appeared in person, but I’m definitely leaning towards her being S or something like that. I thought S might be Sara’s ghost, but then S didn’t know who JTG was and Sara did, so… That seems less likely now, although still possible since Sara could’ve just been pretending she didn’t know who JTG was. But then, I’m not sure if S is this new Princess Sienna because if she’s one of Michael’s closest allies, so why would she want Snow to stay away from him? Unless she just doesn’t want Snow to get involved in all these shenanigans for some reason, which is definitely possible. I wonder what’s up with S, actually. She hasn’t been around much at all lately. She’s obviously given up on warning Snow to stay away from Michael xD I guess she knows she’s fighting a losing battle :P Still, even though everything else in the chapter was sad, there was a whole load of new information revealed in this chapter that I hadn’t been expecting so I’m happy.
February 29, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :) Snow really could use that hug right now, for sure. I'm glad her downward spiral (and she's not done spiraling) seems realistic. While I've grieved before, I've never been hit by something nearly as badly as what Snow's dealing with so I haven't been completely sure how believable her breakdown has been. Snow's asking the same question you, actually. How can she go on after everything that's happened? She can't see a future anymore. Everything seems hopeless and she's kind of lost the will to even try to move on. She just doesn't care anymore :/ Yeah, Michael's secret... I'm not sure I have the heart to drop that bomb on Snow just yet. If she lost Michael now too, on top of everything else I don't think she would ever find a way to keep going. She needs him. Well, at least you believe he loves her xD That's a start, anyway. Despite my saying I'll get you to love Michael, I'm rapidly losing my confidence :P It's my own fault. I made him creepy intentionally at the start and now there's almost no way to uncreepify him.
For the most part, Michael will continue to research magical methods to help Ariana. Kayla's already donated a couple of fortunes into cancer research, so that wouldn't be much help but Michael still believes there's a magical solution despite what Zoe says. The Coven don't know everything about magic, so there's always a chance that there's an answer somewhere. I won't say that all magic comes with a price, but the kind of magic Michael would need most certainly would. That's assuming there's a magical solution at all, but if there is it would come with a pretty hefty cost tied to it. Of course, Snow is so devastated and Michael so determined to help that he might not ask if Ariana is okay with the price. You're right that Michael will do pretty much whatever he has to do to accomplish his goals, but he does have a code he adheres to. I'll keep that code to myself for now, but suffice to say that he has one. There are some things he wouldn't do, some lines he won't cross unless he absolutely has to. Haha, I love Kayla :P She's always so fun to write, especially when she's being threatening. She's telling the truth though. If Michael ever hurts Snow, she'll bring the wrath of the Almighty down on him. Magical powers or no. Although honestly, I always imagine Ariana to be the more terrifying of the two when it comes to Snow. Kayla might bludgeon Michael with a stick. Ariana would burn his entire world down. Hehe, there's something to be said for vindictiveness :P Michael will get his comeuppance in some form or another eventually.
At first I wasn't going to make any mention of what Michael and the Dawnguard are doing or anything about the world they and Zoe inhabit. Now though I've decided to do stuff like this and provide a lot of information with absolutely no explanation or context so there's still not a lot given away. Heh, there's a funny story behind Princess Sienna. I'd been messing around with writing something in the fantasy genre and I'd created this whole world with all these different factions and a ton of backstory and whatnot. I never did anything with it, but when I was figuring out how all the magical stuff would work in this, that whole universe just slid right in. Princess Sienna, who was called Princess Sophia but that had to be changed for obvious reasons, was to be the main character and she was a lot of fun to write. This was the perfect opportunity to use her. I won't say too much about her yet since she won't appear for a long time, but let's just say she's spunky with lots of attitude xD She's technically a queen, but she hates the title so she goes by princess instead. She's a big supporter of the Dawnguard, but whether or not that makes her good or bad remains to be seen. As for Sienna being S... I think it'll be more fun not answering that :P It has been a while since we've heard from S, but they're still out there. They've completely given up on keeping Snow away from Michael, but... okay, I'll give you one hint. S is perfectly positioned to keep an eye on Snow and Michael. That's the only thing I'm saying and I almost guarantee that won't help you one bit :P But do with that what you will.
February 29, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 42 Reply
Wow, this chapter was just… I really don’t know what to say at this point. It’s all so depressing :( I guess I will start at the beginning. I wonder how Jacob would react if Clara ever told him her role in his accident. I thought he might figure it out when she almost told him back at the hospital, but it doesn’t seem like it. Or maybe he has, and he’s just hiding it really well, but that seems unlikely since he hasn’t given much indication of it. That I’ve noticed, anyway :P I am pretty unobservant so it’s still possible. I feel really bad for her though :( To have that guilt eating away at her, on top of the fact that she’s starting to like the guy, but not being able to tell him what she did because otherwise JTG will do something horrible, it’s… Well, it’s a tough situation to be in, and that’s most certainly an understatement :/
Now, about the rest of the chapter. I’m lost for words :( I just… I could see where the chapter was going once Snow started drinking again, but still… It’s really upsetting to see how far Snow has sunk into depression, to the point where she’d even attempt suicide. I don’t really think she’ll die, since there still seems to be a lot for her to do, but… Who knows. You could pull a Ned on me :/ Anyway, her descent into darkness and her thought processes throughout the whole chapter seemed really realistic to me. I could feel her pain very clearly and it was difficult to read that last part because of it. Still, like I said I do think Snow will survive, maybe similar to how Ariana in The Girl and the Warehouse, where she was brought back by supernatural means, since she probably still has tasks or whatever to complete. But even if I’m right, Clara’s certainly correct that her attempt will shatter them all :/ Clara’s words really struck a cord with me in this chapter, especially when she said they needed a victory. I wholeheartedly agree with her on that front. They do need a victory, no matter how small. Especially now :( I’m not really sure what it could be, but they need something to tide them over for a while. Even if it’s just something small, something has to happen to show them that they might have the slightest chance of coming out on top, or at least not have their lives destroyed.
As for Michael, I actually feel really sorry for him in this chapter. Even though I’m certainly not his biggest fan, it saddens me greatly to think how he’ll feel if he’s the one who finds Snow :( He seems the most likely candidate, since we know he’s obviously going to be heading back there – unless Clara somehow gets there before him. I don’t know, I just get that vibe with her being so sure something was wrong in the first part of the chapter, maybe she’ll somehow end up at Michael’s house looking for her and find her before he gets back. Although, I suppose that seems unlikely unless Michael for some reason left his front door open. I wonder what JTG will think of her suicide attempt though. Even though she told Snow to hang herself, I don’t think she’d actually want Snow to die yet – surely she still has plans for her? I guess I think if she wanted Snow dead, she would have killed her back at Halloween when she had the chance. Anyway, overall this was a really emotional, well written chapter and I’m really, really, really anxious to see what happens next.
March 19, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting :) Heh, yeah... this chapter. I've known this was coming for a long time but that in no way made it easier to write. It was tough and it definitely hit some sensitive spots. To be honest I almost cut this storyline entirely. I didn't feel that I was in any place to write this and I wasn't completely sure I even should. That said, it was one of those things I really didn't want to change. It had been part of the plan for so long that changing it was something I wasn't prepared to do. I'm not entirely happy with it, but it is what it is. It really has gotten pretty depressing, so maybe we'll take a little lighter path next time. There's a lot of other characters that I've been neglecting since Snow found out about Ariana, so maybe I'll focus on something a bit less miserable :P We do have a little burglary to get on with after all. Anyway, with Jacob... well, honestly I'm not even sure how he'd respond to learning what Clara did. I've always thought of Jacob as kind of being the polar opposite of Sara. Where she was manipulative and vindictive, he's understanding and forgiving. Then again, Clara did something that completely changed his entire life in a terrible way. He puts on a brave face, but he's pretty depressed about his condition. If he found out Clara was responsible... yeah, I don't really know how he'd respond. That is, of course, assuming he didn't figure it out when Clara almost told him and is hiding it for vindictive, revengeful purposes xD But yes even if Snow survives, the attempt in and of itself will be enough to really hurt her friends and family. A victory would do them all a lot of good on the JTG front. I don't think it will help Snow much at all, but for the rest of them it would work wonders. They need to believe they'll all get through this and find a way to stop JTG. What that will be, or in fact if that will be, remains to be seen.
You know, I normally have some idea of what emotions I hope people feel when they read a particular scene, but with this I honestly have no idea what feeling I want readers to leave with. I guess lost for words works pretty well, come to think of it. Snow's reached rock bottom at this point. She can't really fall any further than this. If she survives, her road to recovery will be a long one. She doesn't feel she has a future anymore. If she can't find a reason to keep going, she'll never be able to recover. Anyway, I'm glad you thought her sinking into depression and the way she's thinking seemed realistic. It's difficult and yet at the same time frighteningly easy to take myself down to a place close to where Snow is now. At the same time, I wasn't entirely convinced it was a realistic portrayal of someone on the verge of suicide. Although it's a strange thing to be happy about, I'm glad that scene was difficult to read. That's reassuring. If it wasn't difficult to read, I did something wrong. As for whether or not Snow will survive, to be honest I'm really torn on the subject. I had always planned on Snow surviving this. I knew all along she would get to this point and that this would happen, but I never expected her to die here. But now I'm really interested in how Snow's death would change the story. I want to see how the other characters would react to and deal with her death. I've been imagining how things would go and I really want to write it, but damn I don't know if I can. It'd be a good twist I think and it would have rippling effects through every part of the story. I mean, she's the lead character and I have no idea who would replace her. Clara, probably, but I don't know. And I've never gotten to Ned Stark anyone before and I kind of want to :P So I don't know. If I thought my heart could take it, I can't deny I'm sorely tempted so... we'll see.
Well, I consider it a personal victory that you feel sorry for Michael xD You may not love him, but it's a step in the right direction. You will love him one day! I will not give up xD He's not going to take Snow's suicide attempt very well, whether she survives or not. He's the one who left her alone, so I'm imagining he'll be blaming himself quite a bit for that. And yeah, he's the most likely candidate to find Snow but that doesn't mean he'll get there first. There are certainly other options and Clara seems likely as well. She's really focused on her feeling that something is wrong, so she won't be able to leave that feeling alone. She's likely to go looking for answers when she feels something so strongly. Of course someone else could find Snow too. Someone who doesn't need to use the front door. I'm just saying :P I can never say too much about JTG's feelings on any particular subject, but I think JTG loves how far Snow's fallen. She was the smartest of the gang and therefore the most likely candidate to figure everything out. With Snow firmly sidelined, JTG's in a pretty good mood. If Snow died JTG wouldn't be too torn up about it. She's still got other victims to torture after all, but no, I don't think JTG actually wants Snow dead. Yet xD
March 19, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 43 Reply
I was really surprised when Sara showed up in this chapter. I fully expected Clara or Michael to be the one to find Snow first, so I like that twist. That part of the chapter was really emotional and sad :( Once again, I liked seeing a more human side to Sara (even though she’s a ghost or whatever :P) since hearing about everything else she’s done tends to make me feel negatively towards her. Anyway, it was really sad but heart-warming that she saved Snow and tried to help her. Sara’s appearance is very curious, though. I don’t think she’s a Guide like Cooper and Claire. I don’t know what she could be, but I don’t think she’s the same as them. Now I’m thinking maybe Sara is S after all, since she seems to be able to wander through Michael’s house at will and you said S was in the best position to keep an eye on Michael. But… in a way that seems almost too obvious, so maybe it isn't Sara :P Of course, the best place to hide something is in plain sight, so maybe you just want me to double-guess myself and Sara really has been S all along xD Or it could be a double-bluff and someone else entirely is S. Okay, I think I’ve confused myself enough for one night :P
Anyway, onto the main point of this chapter: I’m exceptionally glad ad relieved that Snow survived her suicide attempt. Overall, I did expect her to, but the niggling doubt in my mind meant I couldn’t rest easy on the matter xD Still, my personal feelings aside, storywise I think it was the good decision to keep her alive even though it did deprive you of a possible Ned Stark moment (I’m really starting to like that phrase :P). The story’s been so depressing and hopeless lately and killing Snow (particularly by suicide) would have made it a lot bleaker than it already is, possibly almost too bleak, although it’s hard to judge because I'm biased and want Snow to survive. I don’t think my heart could have taken it if she died :/ Sorry if that paragraph is really confusing, by the way. I’m tired xD
I liked everyone’s reactions (in a sad way, of course) to Snow’s attempted suicide. Kayla and Ariana were especially heartbreaking :( I can’t even begin to imagine what they’re going through. I thought it was very realistic how vulnerable they both seemed and how, even though they’re both so broken-hearted were able to lean on each other and give Snow support even though I’m sure they’re both feeling so helpless. It was nice of them to comfort Michael a bit, too. I felt sorry for him. I’m still looking forward greatly to the day when he receives some form of justice for his past behaviour, but even so I know how deeply he cares for Snow and how much this has shattered him like it did the others. Especially since he thinks it’s his fault. Like Ariana and Kayla said, it’s not, but I can certainly see why he thinks that way, especially after what happened to his sister, which I assume is what he was referring to at the end of that paragraph there when he said he was always too late. Although I’m sure there could be other events he’s referring to as well that I don’t know about, but no doubt that was on his mind.
Steven does seem oddly confident about breaking into the Sinclair’s house. I mean, even if the security cameras are down, anything could happen. One of Miranda’s parents could go home early, the neighbours could see them, etc. There’s still lots of potential things that could go wrong. Anyway, his confidence makes me wonder if he’s done something like this before :P Of course, I could be overthinking it and he’s just proud of himself for getting control of their security system and therefore is slightly more overconfident than he should be. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see if Steven’s got any sort of breaking and entering under his belt already xD Still, I wonder if they’ll go through with the plan now Snow is in hospital. Since they were planning to do it without her before, I feel they might, but at the same time they’re all so shattered perhaps it will be put on hold for a while. I hope they do break in sooner rather than later, though. There isn’t much they can do but keep trudging forward, even if it seems like an impossible task :/ I hope they find something to be positive about soon.
Claire’s visit was another part I really liked to read. I was pleasantly surprised she showed up, and her part in the chapter left me with lots of intriguing questions. I really wonder what’s going up in her and Cooper’s part of the world, and what it is that Fate did. Since Sara was in this chapter (and there really is no other evidence supporting this theory xD) I was thinking maybe she changed things in a way that lead to Sara dying before she’d finished all her tasks. That might not be it, but I think it’s likely that Fate’s changing of the rules had to do with her changing the fate of someone in a way that meant their tasks didn’t get completed and the world has been altered as a result, whether it’s Sara or someone else entirely. And of course, JTG’s text there at the end intrigued me too. It was more or less what I expected – as I said for the last chapter, JTG obviously doesn’t want Snow dead at this present moment, although her message was a lot more aggressive than I thought it would be xD Anyway, overall I really enjoyed (in a sad way) reading this chapter. I’m relieved that Snow is physically okay, and I’m really curious to see how her suicide attempt will continue to affect everyone, as well as how their possible break-in will go.
April 28, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :) Appreciate it as always. Yeah, those two were the more likely suspects to find Snow, but I really wanted Sara to be the one who did it. Making Sara seem less like an awful bitch is quite the struggle, but it is something I try to do whenever she appears. Showing her human side, the kindler, gentler Sara if you will, is really important because Sara wasn't all bad. There was goodness in her, despite all the awful things she did. Not to say that Sara was a great person, she wasn't, but she had a heart. Hahaha, ah you're nicely wrapped up in my web of bluffing and deceit :P Keep going around in circles, it makes things easier for me xD I'm not even going to say anything this time. Nothing I say will help and I'm much too excited to get to what Sara really is to risk spoiling it in advance, so I'll just stay quiet.
Yeah, Snow survived and I'm glad I went that route, really. I mean, I figured that's what I would end up doing, but I would've liked to have seen what would have happened if she had died. Despite missing out on a Ned Stark moment (I'm liking that phrase myself now that you mention it xD) I agree that storywise keeping Snow around was the better decision. I even went so far as to write a rough version of this chapter with Michael finding Snow dead and what would have happened after that and I knew I couldn't do it. Like you say, everything's been so bleak and miserable lately that killing Snow would've taken the story to such a dark place that I'm not sure I would've had the desire to continue writing it. That said, I still think it would have been interesting to take such a drastic, hard left turn from my planned course. Although, that was the other reason Snow survived. I've got so much planned that can't happen without Snow. Losing her at this point would require such a massive rewrite... it would be a logistical nightmare :P And nothing there was confusing in the least, by the way.
With Kayla and Ariana, yeah that's what they do. They play off of each other really well. No matter what they're going through, they can still support each other and help prop each other up through everything. I'm glad you found their vulnerability realistic as well. They really have no idea what to do for Snow at this point. Even though both of them attempted suicide, their circumstances were different and that leaves them both feeling very lost as to how they can help her. I'll still consider it a victory that you feel a little sorry for Michael :P Whatever else he is or that he's done, he loves Snow and this has really messed him up. He is definitely thinking about his sister at this point. He turned away from her for just a few minutes and she drowned. He left Snow for 30-45 minutes and she almost died, so that's weighing pretty heavily on him. He was only twelve when his sister died and he's carried that with him ever since and it's the reason for a lot of the decisions that he'd made.
Steven does seem quite sure of his plan, doesn't he? He is pretty proud of himself for hacking their security system so easily, but that doesn't mean he hasn't done something like this before. We don't really know too much about Steven and, well, everyone has their secrets :P Honestly, I'd planned for the burglary to take place in this chapter before they found out about Snow, but the timing of it all just wasn't going to work so it was delayed a bit. That said, I feel confident we'll be getting to the burglary very soon. JTG isn't going to rest just because Snow's out of action and the rest of the gang have to keep going. Mary in particular is stepping up. She's the one that wants to keep going and refuses to give up. Now that Snow is sidelined and Clara has all but given up, the "best" of the gang is out of action. Mary almost subconsciously is trying to fill that void. She's trying to keep them moving forward, but Halloween was just two days ago and they're all still reeling from that and now they're hit with this. They're going to have a tough time moving forward.
I had a lot of fun bringing Claire back. She hasn't returned since she disappeared with Coop all the way back in The Girl and the Warehouse so getting the opportunity to bring her back in was nice. My own real life Claire made me change her hair color to match her own :P She's still ticked at me for killing her namesake. I've been told if I kill Clara she'll never speak to me again xD But yes, let's just say that Fate did a lot of bad things and might very well have broken the universe as a result. Everything Fate and Destiny and the Guides do is to keep the universe in balance. Fate did something that destabilized that balance. Your theory is a very good one, and I will say you're onto something. Yeah, JTG doesn't like anyone trying to quit the game early. She doesn't care about Snow's wellbeing, just that she wants to keep all her pieces in play for the moment.
April 28, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 44 Reply
… And full of terrors! Sorry, I had to do that xD And sorry for taking such a long time to read this :( Anyway, overall I really enjoyed this chapter (in a sad way). Poor Snow :( I’m really worried about her, more than I was before, and that’s saying something. She seems so fragile, so close to breaking down again even though she’s trying her hardest to convince everyone, including herself, that she’s not. I don’t think she’ll attempt suicide again but even so she’s certainly in a dark place and she risks going even deeper into that.
Anyway, JTG’s message made me curious again. I didn’t really think of this when I read the last chapter – or maybe I did, I can’t quite remember :P But I’m pretty sure I didn’t. Anyway I’m wondering why JTG picked Kayla first in that message to Snow. Was it just to put a name to the threat, or is there a specific reason?
Michael continues to be a frustrating creature in this chapter :P I felt sorry for him when he was talking with Snow :( I think you portrayed his emotions and the way the guilt from his sister’s death all came to the surface. I think his conversation with Mary was the most interesting part of the chapter, although I’m not sure what to think of it. After reading that part my theory about why he raped her is the same, and at least he managed to show some remorse for what he did at last, particularly since he’d been so cold about it when talking to Emily before, but… I don’t know. For me it felt too little, too late. I’m sure he’s being sincere when he says he’s sorry, but I still can’t muster up any sympathy for him – in this regard, anyway. Like I said I felt sorry for him for most of the chapter, with Snow and his sister and all, but my sympathy for him vanished when he was talking to Mary (and then came back later). I’m also rather sceptical of his asking Mary to keep it all a secret from Snow. I mean, what does he think’s going to happen? Surely he doesn’t plan on keeping it a secret from Snow forever. I get not telling her now since she’s recovering from a suicide attempt and very vulnerable, but in the long run I don’t think keeping it a secret is a great idea. A lie like that is really not a great basis for a relationship, Michael. If that’s your plan it’s stupid one :P She’s only going to end up getting more hurt in the long run and if he really feels remorse than probably the guilt of it would compel him to tell her eventually and by then things will be a lot worse. But I suppose no matter when she finds out it’s going to hurt, so really it’s a lose-lose situation for Michael. Oh well. If his intentions do turn out to be good, then maybe he should’ve handled things better.
I liked Mary and Snow’s conversation as well. Although, I have to say, Snow’s pretty far from correct when she says being beautiful doesn’t get you anywhere :P I mean, as much as we don’t want it to be true and the world would be a much better place if it wasn’t, in my experience beauty certainly doesn’t hurt when getting you places (just look at the way Hollywood is, for example). I guess as a beautiful person Snow probably can’t see that as well as an exceptionally plain person like me can xD Still, I liked how Snow still tried to help her even though she’s dealing with so much herself. I think Mary holding her up on a pedestal probably doesn’t help much, though. I don’t know, it seems like extra pressure on Snow and she really doesn’t need that. Still, hopefully if Mary does start to gain self-confidence (and, I feel like she’s gained some already, although she’s still got a long way to go) it’ll be better for both of them.
I’m worried about this breaking and entering thing with Miranda’s parents. Although I’m excited because I feel like there might be some useful information to be found, I’m also worried. Steven really did seem overconfident and perhaps there’s a reason for that, but even so it worries me that either JTG (if she doesn’t want them snooping around there) or someone else will find them. I wonder what will happen at the warehouse (I presume that’s what Snow means. I don’t see what else it could be :P). I don’t get as much of a foreboding vibe as I do for the expedition to Miranda’s house, but even so, I’m worried something bad’s going to happen :/
June 21, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Lol, I have been waiting for you to say that xD This is one of those where I was desperate for a title and nothing was coming to mind. I’d originally planned for the burglary to take place in this chapter, but I ended up pulling it at the last minute because it felt unnecessarily tacked on at the end. Anyway, I already know the title of that chapter and I refuse to change it, so I had to scramble for a new title and referencing GoT is always fun and it kind of fits with S’s song, so yeah. Fragile. Yeah, I like that word being used to describe Snow at the moment. She’s sort of holding herself together by sheer force of will. Despite what she’s telling everyone, she’s absolutely no better than she was two chapters ago when she attempted suicide. She knows now that she really does want to live, but she still can't see a way forward. She can't see a future where she's been able to accept Ariana's death. So, she's going to try and pretend that everything is fine when it most certainly is not, which as you say, puts her at risk of falling even deeper into darkness.
JTG's choice of Kayla was certainly intentional. It's no big secret, I just didn't really have a way to spell it out properly. All of JTG's attacks are psychological in nature. Other than Halloween, JTG hasn't actually hurt them or followed through on her threats to rat them out to the authorities. Even Halloween was a psychological attack since JTG proved she could make the girls turn on each other if she wanted to. With picking Kayla first, it was to point out that if Snow tries to hurt herself again then JTG will kill Kayla while Ariana will die from her illness leaving Snow completely alone. It was to make Snow face the possibility of losing both of her parents. That fact hasn't quite hit Snow yet, however.
Hehe :P Well, I guess Michael's still doing his job then :P Michael is... complicated, to say the least. Everything with Snow reminds him so strongly of his sister's death. Riley died on his watch and he's lived his whole life with that weight on his shoulders. It affects him much more than he's let on. It informs so much of who he is. But really, with Michael frustrating is exactly what I aim for. Despite wanting to make Michael a bit more likeable given his relationship with Snow, I still want to keep a good level of mistrust in him as well. So you feeling sympathy for him when he's with Snow, but losing it when he's talking to Mary is exactly what I hope for. Like you said, it really is too little, too late with Mary and no amount of apologizing is going to make up for what he's done, especially without an explanation (and not even with one). As for keeping it all a secret from Snow, at the moment his primary focus is sparing Snow any more pain. He wants to protect her from it for as long as he can. Before this though, I don't think Michael ever intended Snow to find out. I don't imagine he'd ever willing go to her and tell her. It's not a good idea because Mary knows, Emily knows, JTG knows, and our dearly departed Sara filmed a video of it on her now missing cell phone. There’s a lot of sources that Snow could get the truth from, so Michael’s plan of keeping it a secret probably isn’t going to work forever. With everything that’s happened and Michael’s attitude towards what he’s done seeming to shift, he might end up telling eventually. Regardless, you’re right. If his intentions are pure then he ought to have handled everything much better :/
I like writing Snow this way, although I never have been sure why. Snow’s really smart but she has a certain naivety about stuff like that. She wants to believe that the world is exactly as she described it to Mary and she wants to believe that people and the world can be truly good. She gets it from Ariana :P But you’ve got the right of it. Appearance matters. It shouldn’t and it’s unfair and it’s wrong, but a lot of the time it does. Snow, being beautiful, has a hard time seeing things any other way. That’s the interesting thing about writing Snow and Mary together. They are polar opposites of each other in almost every way. Snow is beautiful and wealthy and popular and for the most part she’s an eternal optimist. She’s not quite so much that at the moment since everything’s gone down the pooper, but in contrast to Mary, who’s much more pragmatic, they’re completely different. Mary sees the world as it really is, while Snow sees it through rose colored lenses and looks at things as she wants them to be, not necessarily as they are.
Steven is very confident in his ability to get them inside the house undetected, but there’s still a lot that could go wrong. They’ve got to do it in broad daylight while no one's home so anyone could see them, and since JTG knows pretty much everything you can bet she’ll be watching them. Although if Miranda’s parents are JTG, they might be getting a bit of a surprise xD Yeah, the warehouse is what Snow was talking about. I've been planning on her taking Michael there for a while, I just haven't been able to find a spot to fit it in. Snow's pretty protective of the warehouse and she only takes people she trusts and cares about there. It took her years to take Jackson there and Steven has never been at all. Michael's getting special treatment :P But no, I’m not really planning anything too terrible to happen there. I’m looking for some happier, light hearted moments and getting Michael and Snow off to one of my favorite locations to write in seemed like a good idea. If I have to keep listening to dark, brooding music to set the mood when I'm writing for much longer I'm going to lose my mind :P I figure Snow could use a day off with everything she's been through. The rest of the gang though? Yeah, they're fair game xD *cues maniacal laughter* Thanks for commenting :D
June 22, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 45 Reply
I’m glad Snow agreed to see a specialist, even though she only seems to agree to please her parents. I think it could definitely be very helpful for her, especially if it’s Dr Pinder (I assume that’s who Ariana meant). I mean, he and his team pulled Ariana herself out of a very dark place (bit of an understatement there) so I’m hopeful that they will be able to help Snow as well if given the chance. It’s sure to take time, but even so, hopefully some therapy will help her accept Ariana’s inevitable death or at least be at semi-peace with it.
Still, the break in part of the chapter was definitely my favourite part. It was well written, lots of suspense and there was lots of interesting information to be gained. That video of Tony and Miranda was quite a surprise. I can’t say I was expecting Miranda’s secret to be anything like that – I presume this is the secret that Sara knew about Miranda, at least part of it anyway. It’s interesting that both Sara and Miranda used their desks (in slightly different ways though) to hide things. Also, I’m definitely rather suspicious of Steven at this point. He just seems way to confident and jokey about the whole thing :P Either he’s been watching way too many crime shows (which is admittedly a possibility – those things are addictive) or he’s done something like this before – and if so, what?
As for Miranda’s parents being JTG, personally I’m less convinced than Clara and the gang that they are in fact her. No just because of that last scene, I was rather unsure before then, but that just confirmed it for me. Obviously JTG wants them to suspect Miranda’s parents… But why? Does she just want to keep the eyes off her? Or is there some other reason? I mean, surely they must know about JTG and they’re most likely on her side (after all, if they didn’t know who she is, I have a hard time believing that they didn’t notice a secret, encrypted room in their house that she hid there. Unless JTG is even more of a ninja than she seems :P). Additionally, like Clara thought, it is very strange that Tony doesn’t have a password on his computer which contained his case files and potentially other incriminating information. Maybe JTG wanted them to find out that information for some reason and set it all up, although I don’t know why. Perhaps she wants to get Rachel and Tony arrested as well. I mean, even if Clara and Co. get charged with breaking and entering there’s certainly evidence in their house that they’ve been stalking the girls/may be suspects in Sara’s murder. Perhaps Tony’s computer has some other incriminating evidence that JTG planted to pin the blame on them or something.
I feel bad for saying this, but in some ways, I kind of hope they get caught by Sophia. I’m really curious to see what Sophia’s reaction would be if she gets there and realises her younger cousin’s friends are the masterminds behind the burglary. But regardless, even if Clara and Co. manage to escape by the time Sophia gets there, the door to the JTG room will presumably still be open. Unless JTG is a super ninja and goes to close it in the short space of time between them leaving and Sophia arriving, which seems a little impossible even for her. Still, presuming Sophia does get to see that room, I’m interested to see what she will make of it and how things will change as a result.
I love Dennis’s cat :P So appropriate for him. Anyway, RIP Dennis L Perhaps that’s premature of me to say and next chapter he’ll still be alive and kicking, but I felt like a “Dennis is dying” moment. If she kills the cat I’ll never forgive her. Not that she was particularly forgivable before, having stalked a group of teenagers and likely killed Dennis, among other things, but whatever. Anyway, overall this was a really good chapter, with lots of intrigue and interesting development. I really want to see what happens when Sophia arrives at Miranda’s parents’ house, even if Clara and the gang are still there.Sorry for rambling so much, by the way. Once again, I have to get up at 5 tomorrow morning but I've still managed to stay up far too late considering that :P
July 9, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Yeah, Snow doesn't really see the point in seeing a specialist at this point. She doesn't think anyone will be able to help her, so she views it as a waste of time. She only agrees to go because Kayla and Ariana want her to. But you're right, she's talking about Dr. Pinder and if anyone can help Snow, it would be him. I'm always looking for opportunities to bring back members of the old cast, so this seemed the perfect time to Dr. Pinder to return.
I'm glad you enjoyed the break in :) I'm not completely confident in the quality of the writing for that scene. It didn't come as easily as I'd hoped, but it is what it is. The video of Tony and Miranda was a surprise even to me. I've been holding onto that video for a while now, trying to figure out where to fit it in. It was going to be way back in chapter 32 which was meant to be a flashback to the Miranda thing, but when that changed I didn't have a place to work it in. This seems the perfect place to do it. But yes, this is the secret that Sara knew about Miranda. Well, there's more to it (isn't there always :P) but that's the general idea. There are actually several parallels between Miranda and Sara. They were a lot alike. They thought alike and their circumstances ended up pretty similar. Their fathers both died, neither had a close relationship with their mother, they were both very popular, just a lot of things like that. Also, they were both murdered :P Hahaha, well you should be suspicious of Steven. Heck, you should be suspicious of everyone. Steven has a secret just like everyone else and there's every possibility that his secret involves frequent and regular breaking and entering. Or perhaps he's just secretly obsessed with CSI xD
There's been a fairly even divide between people who believe I've revealed JTG in this chapter and those that think Miranda's parents are just a diversion. Who's right? I ain't saying :P I will say that they know about the room. As you say, it would be practically impossible for them not to know about a room like that in their own house. JTG is certainly a ninja, but even she's not that good. As for why she'd want to frame Miranda's parents (assuming they aren't JTG) well, there's any number of reasons for that. She says there at the end that she's bringing her game towards its end. She's preparing to wrap this up and get to her endgame and she knows her identity will come out at that point, but she wouldn't want that to happen beforehand. Or maybe she has a reason to want Tony and Rachel to go down with Snow and the gang. Or maybe she's just out to destroy as many lives as possible. Or, as Claire suggested to me the other day, maybe JTG is actually not the bad guy but is instead a vigilante that's determined to expose everyone's dirty secrets and bring them to justice :P I'm still not sure how I feel about that last one.
I think it'd be safe to say Sophia wouldn't be very happy with them if she caught them breaking into someone's house. Having to arrest all of Snow's friends wouldn't be easy for her at all, especially not now. Still, if she caught them she wouldn't have much choice in the matter. Now, if she were to find the JTG room... things would get interesting. Although, that's likely to happen either way :P Lol, yes, Dennis had to have his cat xD I was determined to bring him back just so he could have his cat. That cat will be safe, no matter what Dennis's fate is. I've already killed one cat in this story. I couldn't stand doing it again. I'm sure we'll see it again at some point in the future. Anyway, thanks so much for the comment and if there was rambling, it was interesting rambling :) Getting people's thoughts and ideas on chapters like these helps immensely. Now, go to bed :P Technically considering its 10:45 at night over here it'd be early in the morning where you are, but whatever :P Extra sleep never hurt anyone.
July 10, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 46 Reply
Heheh, I’ll admit I’d never heard of a wendigo until I read this chapter and had to google it to see if it was a real myth or if Brad was just making it up xD Still, considering the (somewhat limited) info we have so much about what Brad and Michael do in their spare time, I’m inclined to believe he’s telling the truth even if Sophia doesn’t believe him :P Anyway, overall I really liked that first point of the chapter. It was a surprise for me - I had expected them to get away before Sophia got there and she’d discover the room with all the photos on her own, but this turn of events is much more interesting. I certainly didn’t expect Tony to show up and cover for them, that’s for sure. It raises a lot of interesting questions. But as for him being JTG, eh… I’m still not convinced, even though Clara and Co. seem to be :P I guess Tony probably knows who she is (or at least, he’s in contact with her, but perhaps she hasn’t revealed her identity), but… I don’t know. He seems too sane xD Of course, if he is the real JTG then that may just be a front, but I still feel like there’s someone else too, at least. Someone behind the scenes, who’s more… Well, less mature, I suppose, although that’s not really the right word. I guess with the tone of JTG’s texts, her reaction to Clara deleting her number, Snow’s suicide attempt and the whole Halloween thing I imagined her being more volatile, even though obviously she’s still good at covering her tracks (Dennis :’( RIP). I don’t get that impression from Tony, although he hasn’t exactly appeared much and if he’s really smart he could be putting on that volatile persona to cover his tracks… Plus the phrase JTG wasn’t actually used so I’m inclined to believe he’s not her, although it’s certainly possible that they’re in contact with each other. And I wouldn’t rule out him being responsible, either directly or indirectly, for Sara’s murder given the views he expressed in this chapter. But long story short, I have no idea what to think :P Anyway, now that I’ve sufficiently confused myself, I’ll proceed xD
I liked the tension throughout the group’s confrontation with Tony. He’s a creepy guy, that’s for sure. I’m inclined to believe that video was real, since he had that look of fear when they brought it up (although perhaps he’s just that good of an actor) and I’m curious to see what comes of it, particularly since Sophia is determined to find out what’s going on. I do think Jackson did the right thing by confronting him – I mean, what else could they do, really? But I am worried about the repercussions. Even if the video is real, I’m sure Tony +/- JTG won’t go down that easily. They must have something up their sleeves for him to be so calm about everything :P Anyway, I liked the scene at Clara’s house, particularly the end when Jackson and Snow talked. As someone who’s been continuously on the wrong end of unrequited love I was definitely feeling for Jackson in that part. I’m sorry Snow, I know you mean well but ‘I’ll always love you’ and ‘I want you to find that to’, does not reassure. Not at all :P But I do I feel sorry for Snow too, especially since she’s already dealing with so much. Anyway, this isn’t really related to this chapter per se but I’m curious what will happen with him and Snow if it does turn around that Emilia used magical pheromones to seduce him like that time she kissed Snow. I hadn’t really thought about that for a while, but when I was reading this chapter it popped into my head again. I wonder how they’d both react to that revelation if it turns out to be true.
“And I don’t just say that to make myself look any less like the cradle-robbing pervert I appear to be” that line made me laugh more than it should have :P Anyway, I was glad to see Snow so happy to be back in the warehouse. Of course, she’s still dealing with everything else under the surface but it’s better than nothing. I’m curious to see what happens next at the warehouse – Although I feel like I have a pretty good idea already, but I don’t want to say in case I’m wrong xD Anyway, Snow’s dream - If that’s what it was – dead people come and go all the time in this story so I wouldn’t rule out Snow’s time-travelling daughter from the future inhabiting her mind or something :P Anyway, I thought her dream was well-written, and it was nice to get a bit of hope for the future too. I’m guessing the name of the girl would be Ariana :P That was the first thing that popped into my head, anyway, considering how she acted, but maybe I’m completely wrong and it’s Sara or something xD Still, I’m glad that Snow’s found something to hold onto, something to make her think that they might get through everything with some possibility for a normal life. Although personally I still feel slightly squicked out when Michael’s talking about starting a family in the future with his currently sixteen year old girlfriend. Sorry, Michael :P No matter how mature she acts, it’s still on the creepy side for me :P
And RIP Dennis :( I was surprised that JTG made his death seem natural by using his allergy. It makes perfect sense that she’d do that, but still, for some reason I was expecting a bloody murder. I hope Pookie (that’s my name for his cat. I don’t know why) finds a home…
August 23, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting :D Haha, wendigos are a real myth and I’m somewhat fascinated by that particular myth. Sophia on the other hand doesn’t care either way and thinks Brad is just making things up. It wasn’t intentional since the wendigo was the first supernatural creature that popped into my head, but according to folklore, wendigos supposedly are native to the Great Lakes region which is coincidently where the story takes place. Sometimes everything just falls into place xD Anyway, yeah I wasn’t completely sure at what point Sophia would arrive and I ran through a couple of scenarios but ultimately settled on this one for a couple of reasons. The biggest one being that if Sophia were to see that room right now, a lot of things would have to change. Once the JTG secret gets out, its out for good so if I involve Sophia directly and give her too much information then the police have too much information, which disturbs my carefully crafted plans :P Yes, sometimes I have carefully crafted plans. I don't just make this up as I go along. Seriously. Stop looking at me like that :P Sending Sophia out on a mission to figure out what’s going on between Tony and the gang let’s me involve her without having to do much else or involve even more characters. I’m lazy like that :P As for Tony covering for them… well, assuming that he is in fact JTG (and I’m not saying that he is) he would want the game to continue. JTG’s not ready for the game to end and I don’t think she wants the police to get involved just yet, if at all. We still don’t know what it is that JTG actually wants other than to keep playing this game. I imagine JTG would be willing to protect them if it meant continuing the game. If Tony isn’t JTG, then maybe he doesn’t want them to go to jail for breaking and entering, but for murdering his stepdaughter. Or maybe he wants to kill them himself for revenge and involving the police would complicate matters. I’m not being remotely helpful at making you any less confused, am I? Yeah, didn’t think so xD That’s a great observation about Tony and JTG’s demeanors. JTG seems a bit wild and immature and volatile is especially a good word to describe her. I will tell you this much; whoever JTG is he or she is an amazing actor. By the time we get to the end (which is actually coming up a bit faster than I’d anticipated) I don’t suspect anyone to have figured everything out. That’s mainly down to JTG being such a good actor. I’ve said before that by the time we get to the JTG reveal, she’ll be a character that’s appeared in the story previously. But as I’m still going to be introducing a few new characters before then, I’m not saying if she’s appeared yet or not :P
JTG or not, Tony is that good of an actor as well. He’s a smooth operator and I’ve been thinking of him as Sara on steroids :P He’s a master manipulator, an exceptional liar, and he also has really great hair xD So yeah, his look of concern when the video was mentioned could be him just playing them, or he could be genuinely worried that they have it. Still, you're right that them having the video could certainly bring about some serious repercussions. Tony will in no way, shape, or form want them to keep that video. They may have just made things a lot worse for themselves. And of course no one’s even broached the topic of Tony’s wife, Rachel xD What? I said nothing :P I’m actually quite glad you felt sorry for Jackson here. He’s kind of had a hard time with everything that’s happened between him and Snow. Snow, from his perspective especially, bounced back from their breakup very quickly. She ended up with Michael much faster than Jackson ever thought possible and that hurts him. But yeah, Snow’s way of comforting him doesn’t help at all. It’s probably made him feel worse about it. Snow has her own problems though and she’s still mad at him for punching Michael, so she’s not feeling very friendly toward Jackson at the moment so it probably wasn’t the best time for them to have that conversation. You know, that’s a very interesting question indeed. What would Snow do if she found out Emilia used magic to seduce Jackson and that he was completely innocent and hadn’t actually cheated on her? The fact that he did the same thing that she did helped Snow quite a bit in dealing with that breakup. Both of them were at fault so it made it a bit easier for her. If that weren’t the case… hmm, that’s very interesting and honestly at the moment I don’t have an answer for you. But… maybe someday xD
Lol, my sister constantly refers to Michael as a cradle-robbing pervert so that line was specifically for her xD She got a good laugh out of it too. Going back to the warehouse was a huge help for Snow. She loves that place as much as Ariana does and going back there makes her feel happy despite everything she's dealing with. As for what else will happen at the warehouse, if you're thinking what I think you're thinking then... probably :P I haven't decided for sure, but... yeah, I'm going with 'probably' xD So yeah, Snow's dream/hallucination/actual visit from her time-traveling daughter was as much help to Snow as going to the warehouse. Probably more, come to think of it. It gave her something to fight for, something to believe in. That's the thing she's needed the most; the idea that she could recover from losing her mom. She's starting down the road to recovery. She's still got a long way to go, but this was definitely a turning point for her. Heh, Ariana is absolutely the name I was thinking of for the girl. At least, for her first name. For her middle name, I have other ideas :P I gave her a really toned down version of Ariana's old personality from Warehouse specifically for that reason. I kind of wish I'd kept her around a bit longer because it was fun to write her. Dream or not, I may have to find a way to bring her back at some point. Despite my very best efforts (and believe me, I've tried) nothing I do will ever help Michael become and less creepy than he appears. I wrote some of the sweetest, sappiest, most romantic scenes I could in an attempt to make Michael seem less... well, like the cradle-robbing pervert he appears to be xD All that did was make him seem even creepier than normal xD So, in the creepiness department, poor Michael is screwed :P
I was considering a pretty awful murder for Dennis before I thought it might be more interesting for his death to appear natural. That idea comes from a couple of friends who have told me that if anyone that knows me at all decides they want to kill me they'll just force peanut butter down my throat and no one will ever know I was murdered :P I have lovely friends. But yeah, JTG doesn't want to attract any unwanted attention and another murder in a small town would attract attention. This way, no one's looking for a killer. Well, Dennis had a cat entirely because you mentioned it, so you may as well get to name it too xD I haven't thought up a name yet, but Pookie fits perfectly. He'll find a good home soon, I promise. Someone's taking really good care of him in the meantime though... Bwahahahahaha xD
August 23, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 47 Reply
Sorry for taking such a long time to get to this, and for being later than I said I would be :/Anyway, the beginning of the chapter was really sad to read. I can see why Ariana thinks their sheltering of Snow lead to all her suffering now, but I think I agree with Kayla more. I mean, what are they supposed to do? Murder someone so she’s experienced loss? That seems a bit extreme :P Anyway, I guess I’m not so sure that anything they could’ve done would have made any difference in the end. Even if she’d been less naïve about the way the world is, with all the stuff Snow’s been through… I don’t know if anyone could have been ready to deal with all that; sheltered or not. It’s just not something people are ever prepared for, I suppose. Because of that, I think Ariana’s being way too hard on herself, but like I said, I understand why she might feel that way :/ Anyway,I can’t say I expected Snow to dye her hair xD I’ll admit I was thinking along the lines of some kind of fancy lingerie when Snow said she wanted to try something in the last chapter. I did think it was weird she’d change into said lingerie before dinner rather than after, so the real explanation for what she was doing made a lot more sense than that theory xD Anyway, as I said, the hair dying thing was a bit of a surprise for me. It’s something I never really thought of happening, because… I don’t know. I just never really thought about it, I guess :P Anyway, I hope the change will be a good one for her. It seems to have helped already, after all. I wonder what everyone else will have to say about it when they return to Mistbrook Falls :P
The part with Mary in the graveyard was really sad :( Poor Mary. I’m really curious about what happened on Labour Day, and who it is she’s talking about that she had feelings for that Sara exploited. I wonder if it’s someone we know, but if it is so far I’m drawing blanks over who it could possibly be. It was also interesting to meet Rachel at last. Although, one of my sisters’ name is Rachel (although she spells it differently) and I kept thinking of her which threw me off a bit :P Anyway, sjhe does certainly seem to have more of the temperament I imagined JTG to have than Tony. She’s more vengeful, I suppose, and seems more rash from what little we’ve seen of her. Still, even if she and Tony are part of the JTG machine, I feel like there’s something missing, or someone, I suppose. I don’t think the two of them could’ve done everything by themselves - I mean, who took the photo of Sara pushing Miranda in the first place? That’s the first thing I thought of. I feel like there has to be someone else involved, perhaps someone slightly closer to the group… And the Miranda thing doesn’t explain why JTG went after Jackson, and later Steven as well. Sure, they might’ve done something to Miranda/Rachel/Tony as well, but… I don’t know. It just feels like there has to be another party involved in it all.
Anyway, onto the last part of the chapter. I can’t say I wasn’t expecting it :P I’m always apprehensive when reading sex scenes in stories (particularly on amateur sites like this one) because I feel like they’re hard to get right without making it too cheesy or gross in some way, and few people do in my opinion. Of course, not that I’d do any better if I tried to write one, so I shouldn’t judge :P Anyway, I think you wrote that part of the chapter well. Aside from the general squickiness Michael gives off (sorry, Michael :P You will never win) I thought it was sweet, and I liked how you contrasted their levels of experiencedness (it’s a word) – that made it more interesting, in my opinion. Still, for some reason the ending made me worried. I feel like something bad is about to happen. Snow’s too happy :P Anyway, overall this was a good chapter. There were lots of interesting things to happen and I’m anxious to see what happens next.
October 15, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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No worries for taking a while :) Believe me, I understand. Besides, I know you've been busy with school and stuff and until I start paying you for this service, I don't have any reason to complain :P I think you're completely correct that there's really nothing Ariana and Kayla could have done to prepare Snow for what's happening. Snow certainly was sheltered and she isn't at all prepared to face a world that doesn't love her and want the best for her, but what's going on now isn't something they could have helped her be ready to deal with. So yeah, Ariana is being quite hard on herself in that regard. Still, you'd be hard pressed to convince her of that at the moment. It's probably her biggest fear now, dying and leaving Snow unprepared and she genuinely feels that she failed to do that. Of course, now she's afraid she doesn't have enough time left to fix her 'mistake'. Hahaha, its funny you mention fancy lingerie because I was considering her doing something along those lines in addition to dying her hair. I cut it though simply because in Snow's mindset when they left for the warehouse, she wasn't even thinking about the possibility that she might end up sleeping with Michael. She knew it could potentially happen, but she didn't plan it, so bringing sexy lingerie didn't fit. But yeah, I'd been thinking of having Snow do something with her hair for a while I just wasn't sure what. It took a while before I finally settled on her dyeing it. It's definitely refreshing for her and it has helped her a little bit. Not a lot, mind, but it's a step in the right direction. As for what everyone will say back home... well, I imagine she'll definitely get some comments on it, that's for sure :P
I know right? Mary always seems to have to worst luck :( The person she's talking about isn't anyone we've met yet. He's but one of a rather sizable group of new characters waiting in the wings to be introduced. He'll appear at some point in the future, although likely not until the next story in the series. As I'm planning on wrapping this one up somewhere around chapter 60-65, I don't have time to bring him in. He's out there somewhere though xD Yes, I was glad to finally get to bring Rachel in as well. She's super fun xD She's the kind of villain I love writing. She's justified, in a way, for doing the things she's doing. These girls in essence murdered her daughter and she wants revenge. I can't really say I blame her all that much, unfortunately. But what makes me like writing her is that she's utterly ruthless and definitely vengeful. She wants revenge and she won't stop until she gets it. Haha, well hopefully this Rachel did throw you off. I mean, if your sister is anything like my Rachel you might want to call the police xD Hmm, who took the photo indeed? That's a good question, so of course I'm not going to answer it :P Maybe Rachel took it herself? Although, anyone could have been lurking in the woods that night. I like that the sense of someone else lurking in the shadows seems to still be holding on. Even though I'm obviously supporting the idea that Tony and Rachel are JTG, we've not officially said that's the case so I'm glad you still think there's someone else out there. Also, I think it's safe to say at this point that you might not have to wait too much longer to find out if you're right.
Yeah, so... this part. Like you, I knew it was coming but I didn't know for sure it would be this chapter. I'd considered putting it off a bit longer since it was all fairly predictable, but here we are. Anyway, I actually agree with you about sex scenes. I don't like writing them at all. I don't write them, honestly. I think I've done two now? Ariana and Kayla had one way back when, but I can't think of another that I've done since then. I'd planned on just doing the typical fade to black and move on and in a way I kind of wish I'd done that. I don't hate this scene, but I'm not completely happy with it and I doubt I ever will be. I had the hardest time with it and I wrote... geez, about six different versions of it before I settled on this. It was tough because like you say it was either going to end up being cheesy or gross. I knew I didn't want to be descriptive and use certain words or give much detail at all. That, of course, ends up heading directly towards the cheesiness since you've got to fill the page with something. Now seems as good a time as any to confess to you the lengths to which I went to write this. I'll admit that I was desperate for inspiration, so like anyone in today's world, I turned to the internet for help. This was a very bad idea :P A quick Google search led me to a lovely little site called Literotica, which is basically the Sparkatale for erotica authors. In the back of my mind, I knew what I was getting into before I even started, but I thought maybe I could find something that would be in the same vein of what I wanted the scene to be and maybe it would inspire me. So, there I am on the main page looking at the categories, and oh are there categories. I won't list them here, but let's just say if you can imagine it (and there were a couple I hadn't thought of before xD) it's there. But right there in the middle was a 'How To' category. Perfect, I thought. Surely this would be a section where people post guides and ideas on erotic storytelling. This would surely be exactly what I needed. I have never in my life been more wrong. The very first article in the list was titled How to Shave Pubic Hair: The Second Best Way. Now, first of all, I have questions. Why the second best way? I mean, if there's a best way, why take the time to explain the second best way. Secondly, how many ways are there to shave? It all seems fairly self explanatory to me. Regardless, slightly disturbed by my first finding, I moved on. The second in the list was dubbed Save the Cat? No, Burn the Bitch. I still have questions, but I was much too frightened to even dare open that one. When I got to number 3, the title of which was so graphic I probably shouldn't type it in the comments section, I promptly closed the website and have since sworn never to return. I've seen things now. Things I can't unsee. I'm a changed woman :P I don't really know why I felt the need to share the depths I sunk to in order to write this, but there it is and now you know. Anyway, hopefully it's not too bad although I doubt I'll be trying my hand at another sex scene again in the near future either way. I was trying to expand my horizons and do something I don't normally do and I've discovered I didn't enjoy it nearly as much as you might think :P
Anyway, thanks so much for commenting :) Oh, but just because Snow's happy doesn't automatically mean something bad has to happen. This isn't back in the Warehouse days where we constantly go from them being happy to ruining their lives and back again. Besides, what else could I possibly do to Snow at this point? Oh right... lots of things :P
P.S. Experiencedness is now officially added to my vocabulary and I will be using it regularly xD
October 16, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 48 Reply
Sorry for taking ages to comment on this :/ I just seem to be unable to organise myself lately. Anyway, after the first part of the chapter I’m really wondering what JTG’s plans for Sophia are. I mean, alerting Sophia to her presence just doesn’t seem that smart if her aim is to kill/capture/torture the girls some more, since last time I checked those things are illegal :P But Sophia’s pondering in this chapter made me wonder if there’s more to Miranda’s death than is currently known. Maybe she actually survived the fall and someone finished her off when she was injured. That seems most likely to me, since I think the girls (and Sara too) would have noticed if someone else pushed Miranda too. I know JTG is probably lying to Sophia and just saying Sara and Miranda were killed by the same person to capture her interest, but still, it feels like there’s something missing from the info we currently know about that night.
Anyway, I thought you wrote “the morning after” part of the chapter well. I liked Snow’s worry that she might not have satisfied Michael due to her inexperience. She’s been dealing with so much lately and those feelings really reminded me that she, despite acting mature most of the time, is only sixteen. And of course, that thought led to the inevitable gain of a few creepiness points for Michael :P As for Snow’s pregnancy scare, I’ll admit I’m a little apprehensive about it. Simply because I’m not quite sure where you’re going to go with it and once again I feel teenage pregnancy is another thing that can be either done right or very wrong. Still, if you do go down that path I’m sure you’ll write it well, but I’m very scarred from other stories :P Anyway, I liked the connection between the dream Snow had and that scene. That dream has helped her get going, but considering her current state of mind it would be one of the absolute last things she needs right now. And also, I’m not sure how relevant this is but I was a little confused that neither Snow nor Michael seemed to consider the morning-after pill :P Unless they don’t have it in USA or something, which seems unlikely to me. But then, I have no idea at all what your pharmacies are stocked with xD
Anyway, I really liked the part where Zoe showed up in the warehouse. There was a lot of intriguing information to be gained in that section, although I’m not quite sure what to make it. Firstly, Newcastle Academy of the Arcane, he says. Sorry Michael, I think you meant Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry :P You can’t hide from me. Anyway, all these mentionings of Sienna really intrigue me. I hope she appears in the story soon, although I have a feeling you’re going to make me wait a long time xD I still think she’s a viable candidate for S. But then, if she is Michael’s cousin and presumably they have a good relationship it seems a bit mean of her to tell Snow to stay away from him, but there could be some other reason why she doesn't want them together even if she and Michael are close. I’m also wondering what this Alexandria he wants to keep the Coven from is. When he said Alexandria the first thing I thought of was the city in Egypt. Somehow, I don’t think that’s what he’s talking about :P At least, I don’t see how Michael could protect that city when he’s on the other side of the world xD My next thought was that Alexandria is the kingdom that Sienna rules.
I’m glad that Snow finally got to talk with Dr Pinder. I’m happy that it made her feel better and Dr Pinder certainly gave her some really good pieces of advice. I was rather surprised that he realised something (i.e. JTG) is going on, considering that no-one else has realised that without being told. He’s a smart cookie, that one :P I also liked that we got to learn a little more about Ariana’s time there too. Yay, Pookie is safe :) I don’t know what I expected, but I certainly didn’t expect Ariana and Co. to take him in. It seems obvious now it’s happened, but the thought never crossed my mind before xD At least JTG let him go to a good family, even if she was probably just using him to freak Snow without having some kinder, cat loving motive hidden beneath her craziness :P
And by the way, thanks to you I’m gonna have Bad Blood stuck in my head for the rest of the night (well, morning, since it's almost 1 o'clock) and possibly tomorrow/today :P Although I do like that song, but I'll get sick of it after the first few hours xD
December 22, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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It's perfectly fine if you take a while, I completely understand :) Well, JTG's plans for Sophia are a bit more... long term, I suppose. She's only sent Sophia the one text after all, so she's not in any hurry to help Sophia learn the truth. As for your theory that there may be more to Miranda's death than is known, well there's more to everything than is currently known, so you may be on to something. It's safe to assume that you don't know what you think you know :P Also, I should point out that JTG never actually said that Miranda and Sara were killed by the same person. She said: "What if I help you kill two birds with one stone? I know who killed Sara and Miranda Sinclair." Sophia certainly took that to mean they were both killed by the same person, but JTG didn't definitively say that.
Well, I'm glad you thought the morning after bits were okay. This chapter took way longer to write than I'd planned and it was this scene that caused most of it. Hahaha, poor Michael :P He's never going to win, is he? How many creepiness points is he up to now? He'll never recover xD Heh, your confidence in my ability to write teenage pregnancy well might be misplaced :P I have no idea how well I'd be able to write something like that if I went that way with it because I've never even attempted it before. This is yet another point that I'm honestly on the fence about. I could go either way at the moment and have story ideas for both outcomes. Mainly I'm fascinated by the idea of Snow being pregnant with Michael's baby when she finds out about Mary. Yeah, I'm sadistic like that :P Still, you're right that a baby is the last thing Snow needs to deal with right now. Her dream has helped her, but that's less about the baby and more about the idea that she's been able to live her life and be happy despite her mother's death. That and also because I'm really tired of writing horrible depressed and emotionally devastated Snow. I was honestly planning on keeping Snow in a dark place for a while longer still, but given that I try to put myself in the same emotional state as my characters, it was beginning to take more of an emotional toll on me than I was willing to accept. I mean, the chapter where Snow finds out about Ariana was written almost a year ago, so yeah. Anyway, as a result Snow's bouncing back more quickly than I'd planned, but oh well. Um... *silently commences Operation: Don't Look Like A Complete Idiot* yeah, the morning after pill. Right. Well, see, what had happened was this story takes place in the future. It takes place in 2027, so in that time doctors realized that the morning after pill was causing debilitating illnesses in women taking it, so it was banned. No one is allowed to sell it or produce it anymore. See? That's a totally believable turn of events and I absolutely didn't forget all about the morning after pill and make up all that on the spot. There's absolutely no reason for me to go back and edit anything about the morning after pill at all. No, I've made zero mistakes here and don't need to go back and edit anything. These are not the droids you're looking for. Nothing to worry about. Move along :P
Hmph, Hogwarts? Hogwash. Ilvermorny's where it's at :P Yeah, that's probably the laziest name for a school of magic and I'll admit I didn't put a lot of time into it. At the moment I doubt we'll ever even see Newcastle (unless I ever decide to go ahead with that Coven-focused short story I've got bouncing around in my head) but I still wanted to flesh out the Coven a little bit before we meet them properly. Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you but Sienna isn't going to appear for quite a while. In fact, she likely won't appear until the sequel but hopefully the wait will be worth it. She's not at all what most people think of when they think of a princess, let's put it that way. Hmm, you're the second person to think of the city of Alexandria. Interesting. I'll just say that you're not completely off the mark with that one. Not completely off the mark at all. As for Sienna's kingdom, it's actually called Divinity. It's been mentioned, but I've never made it at all clear that Divinity was her kingdom.
The meeting with Dr Pinder was probably the thing that has helped Snow the most, although I don't think she's realized it yet. He's set her on the right track for recovery, but it's still up to her to stay on course. Good old Dr. Pinder has decades of experience in dealing with secretive, closed off people so he's gotten really good at reading people so he picks up on the JTG problem fairly quickly. He has no idea what's going on, of course, but he can tell she's keeping something big to herself. When I started this chapter I hadn't planned on talking about Ariana's time there at all. When I was writing it just seemed to fit so I went with it. I was glad because I never really explored too much of what happened to Ariana while she was at Harbor Bay, so it was fun to get to do that. And yes, Pookie is quite safe and going to live with a nice family. But no, it's not at all because JTG loves cats and has everything to do with scaring the crap out of Snow and making her realize just how far she's willing to go. Snow suspected it before, but now she knows that JTG can and will kill people.
Hahahaha, I'm sorry xD That line just fit so perfectly into this that I knew it had to be the title. Given my love of Taylor Swift, it was bound to happen and once I thought of it I couldn't change it. But at least you didn't get Holiday stuck in your head after the last chapter since that title is a line from that song :P Apparently I'm choosing my titles based on song lyrics now or something, I don't know. Anyway, thanks so much for commenting :) Oh, and Merry Christmas! I know it's early but unless I get a sudden injection of free time between now and Sunday (and given all the holiday related stuff I have going on over the next couple of days, that seems unlikely) I won't be able to return the PM before Christmas, so I'll just say it here instead xD
December 23, 2016 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Aww, thanks! Merry Christmas to you too :) And haha you’re not early at all for me, it’s 5 minutes from Christmas right now, so that’s pretty good timing in my opinion :P
December 24, 2016 | Genevieve Middleton
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Chapter: 49 Reply
Well, I’m glad Snow finally remembered the morning-after pill. Better late (but not too late :P) than never, I guess xD Anyway, I really liked the scene in the pharmacy. I was excited to see Rose again, not to mention the reappearance of Snow’s future daughter :P Still, her appearance was rather worrying. I’m not sure if I believe her time-travelling excuse. She could be saying it to throw Snow of the scent. Perhaps she’s a guide, like Rose, which means she might be dead in the future and that’s what she was upset about. But I don’t think that’s very likely, since it seemed like whatever made her sad wasn’t to do with herself being dead or injured. Still, I wouldn’t rule it out. But if she really is a time-traveller and if it did happen to someone else, than what and who was she so sad about? She said it wasn’t Snow, and the only other people I know she would know are Michael, and maybe Kayla (I assume the first Ariana will already be dead by then, unless a miracle happens). But focusing on Michael, you’d think if he were dead then the second Ariana would be visiting him rather than Snow. Unless she just popped in to perk Snow up before going home after spending time with him :P Anyway, her visit led to a lot of new mysteries and I’m curious to see if she’ll appear again.
Poor Sophia :( I hadn’t really thought of Mike’s (the first one :P) death in a while so it was good to be reminded of him. But it was very sad to see how Snow’s drinking, driving and suicide attempt affected her because it’s something you didn’t touch on when it originally happened. Snow’s thoughts about her selfishness were also really sad to read. I don’t think she’s selfish for not thinking of how her actions affect others 24/7. I mean, it’s practically impossible for someone to constantly consider others every single time they do something, especially if they, as Sophia said, have just been through emotional trauma like Snow finding out her Mum is dying. Even the most selfless person in the world could overlook someone’s feelings in that situation.
I have a feeling that Clara’s secret is not going to be secret for much longer. JTG or no, she just seems to be reaching her breaking point. What with Jacob talking about his chair and how it’s affected him, not to mention him wanting to meet her the next day, it just feels like she won’t be able to keep it a secret. If she does tell him, I wonder what JTG will do. I guess it will depend on how Jacob reacts, I suppose, but I’m sure JTG won’t be happy either way. Or maybe I’m completely wrong and she goes to meet him without any mention of her role in his accident :P Anyway, overall I really liked that part of the chapter. It was really sweet to see the trust Jacob and Clara have developed. It was interesting (and sad) to see his thoughts on how the accident affected him too. I’m glad he’s managed to come to terms with it, at least partly. I mean, even if he does manage to gain back enough function to walk again, he’s probably never going to go back completely to what it was like before – at least, it would be very unlikely. Anyway, I’m really looking forward to seeing what happens when he and Clara meet up. Even if she doesn’t end up telling him, I get the feeling something will happen.
Well, of course they don’t get access to everything on Sara’s computer :P I really should have expected that, but for some reason I didn’t xD Damn JTG/Sara for covering their tracks. At least they have a line of files, right? :P Particularly since one of those files provides the evidence they need against Tony. Still, that’s only one video. I want to see what else was in that line of files xD Anyway, I wonder why Miranda wanted to destroy Tony. I mean, clearly he’s lacking a decent moral code, but I wonder what it is she wanted that destroying him could achieve. I’m really excited but nervous to see what happens next. I’m worried about Snow’s plan. I don’t think Tony will be all that convinced not to sell them out with their secrets even if they act like they don’t care and he’s brought down with it, either from the police or his wife finding out about his affair with Miranda. I mean, for Clara, Snow, and Mary, jailtime could be involved. Still, I agree that they’ve got to do something, so I guess it’s worth a shot. But I’m still not as convinced as they are that Tony (and Rachel) are the only people involved as JTG. I mean, for Tony at least, if he has a successful career surely he doesn’t have time to stalk a group of teenagers and send them texts that relate to what they’re doing right then. Sure, Rachel could be doing it – I can’t remember if you mentioned a job for her – but even so, that’s a lot of kids to cover at once for one person :P I still feel like there’s someone else, maybe even just a (possibly magical) lackey, who’s involved.
Wow, Emilia’s much more badass than I thought. At least, I think it was her fighting Zoe at the end. I don’t quite remember what she looks like, but it sounded like her to me. Still, I’ll be super embarrassed if it turns out it’s not actually her after I’ve said all this xD I’m not an idiot, honest. I just seem like one :P I wonder if she really is dead after that. I guess we’ll find out soon, but I feel kind of sorry for her if she is even though she’d be perfectly happy for Zoe to be dead. Anyway, I’m excited now because it seems like some of the magical stuff in this story won’t stay secret for much longer xD I’m looking forward to meeting this infamous coven, and Sienna if she appears this early (which judging from your earlier comments I’m guessing not), Still, something’s certainly going to happen very soon.
February 21, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting! :) Haha, yeah she finally remembered :P The entire first paragraph should really just read like this; Serina is an idiot. This should have happened in the last chapter. Please try to forgive her, she's shockingly forgetful. Seriously, that's pretty much what I was thinking the entire time :P I started to edit the last chapter to add it in, but that would have required people to go back and reread a chapter they'd already read so in the end this is what I came up with to fix my mistake. I got to bring back future Ariana though, so I suppose some good came out of it. Bringing Rose back has been on my list of things I want to do for a really long time but I haven't been able to find a suitable spot to fit her in. She was going to be the one to visit Snow in the hospital, but it made more sense for Claire to do that instead, so Rose was replaced. Still, Rose is still out there giving advice and guiding. She'll reappear again at some point. She mainly appeared in this chapter just to remind people that I have not forgotten about the Fate/Destiny storyline either xD It's still there, it's just sort of in the background like it was for the majority of Warehouse. As for future Ariana, I'm just going to leave all of that up to your imagination for now. This isn't something I plan to address for a good while. In fact, at the moment I have no plans to bring future Ariana back for a third visit. That said, I've been developing plans for the future. I've always wanted to try my hand at writing fantasy and I'm using this as a way to slowly create a fantasy world without having to jump into it immediately. Fantasy isn't an area that I feel at all comfortable writing in, so I need to ease myself into it :P I have the Coven and their school that I can go and tell stories in some day, or I can do something with Sienna and Divinity, or Michael and the Dawnguard. It's all connected in a way, but they could all be separate stories able to be read without ever needing to read any of the others. A sort of anthology series or something. Future Ariana would certainly be part of that in some way. And on that note, I'm completely rambling and totally off topic :P
I've had that scene with Sophia in the back of my mind for years. Even when Sophia's Mike (I've got to stop naming new characters after old ones :P) died, I had a vague idea of this scene even though I had no idea what would bring it about. Actually, 'idea' is too strong of a word for what I had in mind at the time, but still :P In a way, this chapter is the payoff for something I've been planning for years. That's one reason why I specifically didn't mention Sophia's feelings on the matter at the time. I knew I wanted to do this scene (which for whatever reason always took place in a basement, although for the life of me I don't know why) so I held off for a while. This isn't something Sophia would have hit Snow with right after everything happened, so it was pushed back to now. I completely agree with you about Snow's feelings on being selfish. She's being really hard on herself. I'd say she's got the right to be a little selfish with everything she's dealing with. At this point though, she's begun to realize just how much she doesn't ever want to be like Sara and everything Steven told her back on Founder's Day has weighed on her ever since. She doesn't want Steven to be right, yet she's staring at proof that he was. That's really hard for her to deal with. She wants to be better than Sara was, but now she's convinced she's no better at all and that's really painful for her.
Clara is definitely reaching her breaking point, that's a certainty. All of them are, really. She's consumed by guilt over what she did to Jacob, and the relationship she's built with him (and her potential feelings for him) has only made things worse. She wants to tell him the truth, but after what happened the last time she crossed JTG, she's rightfully scared. JTG had her mother fired within a day just for blocking her number, so if she outright defies JTG's instructions not to tell Jacob the truth, then she's just asking for trouble. Then again, it's JTG we're talking about :P She makes up her own rules, so who knows? Maybe she'll throw a monkey wrench into the whole situation. Anything's possible. Anyway, I'm glad you liked this part of the chapter. I've been wanting to include Jacob much more than I have, but with so many characters all demanding attention he just doesn't get as much page time. Also, for a long time I wasn't really sure what I was going to do with him. He was a plot device for Clara's secret and nothing more. Now that I know how I'm going to use him, he should start to appear that much more. As for what might happen when they meet... well, things will happen. Let's just leave it at that :P
Lol, no, no, they couldn't possibly have gotten access to all of Sara's secrets. It would have told them too much and where would the fun be in that? xD It was JTG, by the way, that fried the computer. It's not made explicitly clear in the chapter, but its not meant to be any kind of big secret. As for what's in the rest of the files, they'll be looking at those in the next chapter. That video kind of distracted them :P Anyway, with Miranda I'd say its less that she wanted to destroy him and more about the fact that she could if she wanted to. She's blackmailing him, basically, into giving her whatever she wants. She had his career, his marriage, and his reputation held in her hands. There wasn't much poor Tony could do. Heh, well you probably should be worried about Snow's plan. It's rash, no doubt, but they do have to do something. It may not work, but for the moment it's all they've got. I suppose that's really one of their biggest problems at the moment. They're convinced that Tony and Rachel are their only enemy, and based on the evidence they've collected I can't really blame them. Still, it's certainly possible that Tony and Rachel have someone or even a group of people helping them and if they do then all of their planning might be completely for naught. If they're wrong and Tony and Miranda aren't alone in all this, Snow and the gang could be in a lot more trouble than they realize. Rachel does have a job, by the way. I have no idea if I ever mentioned it before and right now I couldn't even tell you what job she's supposed to have, but she does indeed have one :P Allow that to affect your JTG theories however you wish xD
It was Emilia that Zoe fought, so no reason at all to feel like an idiot :P The only reason I didn't outright confirm it in the chapter is because Zoe has no idea who Emilia is and it would have seemed odd for her to announce herself so directly before doing battle :P Anyway, yes, it was her and she's not that shy, nervous girl anymore, is she? You'll find out pretty quickly what Zoe thinks about whether or not Emilia is dead, and maybe get a bit more information about... related stuff xD Anything else I say would drift into spoiler territory, I'm afraid. But yeah, some of the magical stuff is starting to filter in more and more. It's certainly an uncomfortable time for me because, well I have to write scenes like that battle from time to time. That was quite a challenge considering how short it was and I'm not at all sure of the quality of the fight, but it was my first non-scifi action sequence so I guess it'll do. But yes, stuff and things are coming. I still don't know how much will happen before the sequel comes around, though. With this chapter we've entered Snowfall's final act and I'm pretty focused on JTG leading up to the finale which is approaching faster than I expected, so the magic may take a bit of a backseat to the JTG mystery. If so, the Coven and especially Sienna wouldn't appear until the sequel, but I can say with certainty that if they do get pushed to the sequel, you can expect much more of the magical storyline right from the start and hopefully it'll be worth the wait. There will be a lot less secrets on that front to be sure and it'll take a much more upfront role than it has so far. That'll be great for me as well because I can finally stop holding back so many secrets :P
February 22, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 50 Reply
Well, this was certainly an interesting (and frightening :/) chapter :P Brad’s opinions about Snow at the beginning worried me a little. I mean, I can understand why he sees Snow as a threat, if the person they keep talking about really does need her for his diabolical plan. And although it pains me greatly to say it, if killing Snow would help save the other 7 billion people in the world (or even more than that, since this is technically the future :P) then I’d have to support him. But since Zoe said it wouldn’t make a difference (and she’s clearly a far more neutral party than dear old Michael) then I can’t see any reason to justify kill Snow. I hope the fact she’s dismissed the idea will deter Brad, but… I don’t know. I just get this vibe that if the situation becomes even worse – say if Zoe dies, which is the main scenario I’m imagining right now - then he might try it anyway in desperation.
It was sad to see the reaction of all the girls’ to Sara’s files :/ Even though they knew (or had strong inklings) about what Sara was really like, it’s got to be hard to hear something like that. I’m not entirely convinced that JTG isn’t the one behind those files, though. After all, she’s obviously been on Sara’s computer if she was able to make it burn-out when they managed to get into it. That said, it doesn’t make much sense that JTG would change the contents of the laptop if she didn’t intend them to have access in the first place, so I think it’s more likely Sara really was the one who wrote them. Still, I’ll keep that thought in the back of my mind, just in case. I mean, it seems like something Sara would write, but… I don’t know. I guess it’s her thoughts about Snow that make me think JTG might have had a role. I do believe that Sara loved Snow, and her words on her specifically seemed a bit harsh, I suppose. Anyway, moving on. It’s interesting that Sara seemed to think Nikki was the one most likely to be JTG. I guess out of the four girls I’d pick her too, mostly because she’s the one we get the least perspective from so it’s harder to rule her out :P Still, even saying that, she’s not high on my list of suspicions. If I were to pick someone out of the inner group to be JTG, my money’s on Steven. I’ve been a little suspicious of him for a while now but after the computer blew up in the last chapter my suspicion has grown since it would have been pretty easy for him to set that up himself and feign anger when it happened. I wouldn’t say I’m dead sure about it, not at all, but… I don’t know. I get a vibe :P A small one, but it’s definitely there.
Anyway, moving on from my ramblings, Clara’s part of the chapter raised a few questions too. I’m quite curious about Gwen the dog girl :P Her animal-like qualities reminds me of the chimeras from the manga version of Fullmetal Alchemist, although I doubt that’s what influenced you xD Anyway, right now I’m wondering if she actually is a magical person infused with the behaviour/mannerisms of a dog or if that’s just the way she is :P Regardless, I’m curious to see what her role will be. Anyway, the part with Clara and Jacob was both heartwarming and sad at the same time. I was kind of disappointed she didn’t tell him what had happened. Of course, I understand completely why she didn’t – after all, JTG’s shown she’s perfectly willing to kill so Clara’s rightfully not going to take her threat lightly, but… I don’t know. It just makes me sad, I suppose, for both of them. Jacob’s going to find out eventually and it’s going to be so much worse now that they’ve confessed their feelings to each other :/
Well, that confrontation with Tony at the end went about as well as I expected :/ I believe Tony when he says he’s not JTG. I never really thought he was (Rachel, though, I can’t rule out). Still, I don’t altogether believe him when he says he doesn’t know who JTG is, or his claim that they haven’t been working together and he and Rachel have been completely unsuccessful in their attempts to spy on the girls. I think it’s possible they’ve been working together more than he’s implying. Or he could be telling the complete truth, I don’t really know :P Anyway, regardless of JTG’s role I’m very worried about Jackson and Snow right now :/ I have no idea how they’re going to get out of this one. I’m slightly more worried about Jackson, since at this point he seems more expendable than Snow so I think he’s more likely to get killed/injured. Still, hopefully once they tell him the others are ready and waiting to send the video on Tony will reconsider, since having murder on his head as well as statutory rape will only tarnish his chances even more. But who knows, really, Tony seems pretty desperate right now >.< I’m going to be very worried until the next chapter, that’s for sure.
April 14, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment! :) The interesting thing (for me at least :P) about Brad is that he has a perfectly valid point. One life vs. 7 or 8 (Google says the estimated population by 2030 will be 8.4 billion, so subtract a few for 2027 :P) billion lives is a pretty fair trade, even if Snow is that one life. Brad isn't a bad guy, he's just thinking about the greater good. Even if Snow's death just buys them more time, he's all for it. It's not that he wants to kill Snow or anything. He doesn't and he wouldn't enjoy it, but he would do it if it had to be done. He's certainly not going to just go and do it directly against Michael's orders, but if things got bad enough... well, who knows? Desperation drives people to do things they might otherwise wouldn't.
Sara's files were a punch to the gut the girls didn't need, that's for sure. Even though they all knew what Sara was like, they didn't realize she thought about them like that. That's still a tough thing to find out about someone that was supposedly your friend. That's an interesting theory, I must say. JTG would have had access to Sara's computer, so she would have been able to edit, delete, add, etc anything she wanted to. Then again, Sara certainly had the capacity to be harsh and she would never have intended the files to be read by anyone but herself. She would also have been stalked by JTG for quite some time by the time these were written, so that could also have affected her way of thinking and her attitude. Or maybe Sara was just that mean :P Well, that's what not being a POV character gets Nikki :P I can't blame you for picking her, either. Her lack of POV means we don't get to see her thoughts when JTG texts come in or anything like that. The others can almost be ruled out because they've all been seen getting texts when they were alone and from their own POV. Nikki doesn't get that. Poor thing :P You know, I honestly am surprised Steven isn't suspected more than he is. Very little is known about him and he absolutely has good reasons to hate Sara, and by extension, the girls. The computer blowing up is another good example. He's a pretty suspicious guy and he could easily be playing them all and they would never see it coming. That's kind of what I want to do and that was a big disappointment for me with Pretty Little Liars. They spent years building up A and it turned out to be someone no one really cared about. I'm not saying JTG is part of the core group, but I want JTG to be someone at least halfway important to the story and for her motivations to be relatable.
Haha, Gwen the dog girl :P Little Gwen is a character I've been wanting to introduce for quite a while, but it's never felt like the right time. Before I end this, I'm planning to introduce at least two new characters and Gwen was one of them. I can safely say Fullmetal Alchemist wasn't my influence for Gwen, although I have seen the anime. In fact, Gwen changed significantly just recently. I can't say where the influence for those changes come from because it would tell you too much about her. Let's just say she was always meant to be exactly what she is, but when I saw this character in a youtube video I knew I had to alter her mannerisms to match. The temptation was just too much to resist :P After we get to the part where more about Gwen is revealed I'll have to link you to the video. You'll... you'll see xD As for Clara and Jacob, yeah it's a really bad situation. Clara wants to tell him so badly, but she can't risk angering JTG who she knows will follow through on her threat. I did consider letting her tell him for a moment, but I've got to admit that the opportunity for so much more drama was too hard to resist. I'm a bad person :P
Yeah, the confrontation with Tony was never going to go well, was it? I don't think I managed to convince anyone Tony was JTG to be honest. I wasn't really trying to and how anti-climactic would it have been if he had been? Or maybe since nobody bought into the idea, it might have actually worked out really well? Hmm. Anyway, Tony is... well, a lot of things :P An accomplished liar is one of them, so take everything he says with a grain of salt. There's a lot more to his story than has been revealed. You might be able to pick up a hint of part of it from this chapter, although no one else that's read this has said they have, so maybe not :P A lot of seemingly unrelated storylines are tied together and we're just now starting to get to the point where some of that is starting to come out. On the JTG side of things, Tony knows more about a lot of things than he lets on. Is JTG one of those things? Who's to say? Anyway, you probably should be a bit worried about Snow and Jackson right now. Tony is desperate and again desperation can lead people to doing things they might otherwise not do. Then again, Tony is pretty smart and murdering two teenagers in his own home isn't exactly a wise move. Unless this is all a trap and Tony is working with JTG and this was the plan all along. I mean, stranger things have happened, right? :P Anyway, thanks again for the comment! I'll be getting to Stories from the Island in the next day or so. I've already read it, but I've been in Florida since Wednesday for Star Wars Celebration so I've been a bit busy fangirling over the last few days :P
April 15, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 51 Reply
Sorry for taking a long time to read this :/ I haven’t been felling very well these past few weeks. Anyway, I must say you scared me quite a bit coming into this with that chapter title :P Which was undoubtedly your intention, but still xD I’m exceptionally glad that nobody died. I was quite certain that Jackson wouldn’t make it or would be worse injured than he was, but in this case I’m glad to be wrong. I really liked the way you kept the tension up throughout this entire chapter. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time, certain that something really bad would happen and that Jackson/Snow and later Mary/Michael would be badly injured/killed. It was only at the end I could breathe a sigh of relief, but of course, by then there was so much else to think about. I wonder what JTG was referring to at the end. I don’t have much of an idea how Tony could be involved – after all, Sara was the one to push her, the girls saw it so unless he’s got some shape-shifting power I don’t know about I don’t see how he could be involved in that :P I guess whatever it was must have happened just before, but I haven’t got much of an idea of what it could be. Anything I think of just doesn’t seem very likely. Still, the way JTG worded that message makes me even more convinced that she and Tony have been in cahoots (my new favourite word :P) before, aside from JTG simply sending him and Rachel that photo. I mean, she says “don’t forget” – surely she must have told him something to forget before :P Otherwise, that’s just unreasonable xD Of course, it’s not like reasonable is a word that describes JTG, but eh, it could mean something. I should stop rambling now, shouldn’t I? :P
Anyway, I should get this out of the way before I change my mind: Michael’s pretty badass xD Still, I’m a bit annoyed at you because I was getting super excited during the part with Michael and Mary, thinking he’d tell her why he raped her and I’d find out if I was right but then you go around and make him tell her off-page :P Still, now that she knows I don’t think it will be too long until the audience finds out, so I guess I’ll just have to exercise some more patience xD Anyway, speaking of that scene in general, I was quite surprised that Michael did tell her. It’s not something I ever really thought would happen – I thought the first person to find out would be Snow when JTG/someone else revealed it to her behind his back. Now, that could still happen, of course, but (depending on what it is) it’ll certainly be interesting to see what Mary says if Snow asks her about it. Anyway, it’s good he did tell her, because as they both said I think she certainly deserves to know why. Still, overall I think he’s handled the whole situation badly regardless of what he did in this chapter, but I’ll reserve further judgment for now until I hear his reasons.
Anyway, I found Tony and Snow’s conversations interesting (and tense) in this chapter. Particularly the part near the end when she thought she’d found a way to talk him down through their shared pain. I was a little sceptical when he was answering her and seeming to sympathise her since it was such a change from before, so I wasn’t too surprised when he revealed he was faking it. Still, those scars are surely real, so I’m curious what the story behind them is. Particularly considering the way he spoke about rape to Snow beforehand – his emotions then seemed real to me. Maybe he was raped and that’s what drove him to attempt suicide? That seems like the most likely scenario to me at the moment, but it could easily be something else since it’s not like I have all the information. Anyway, overall this was a really tense and thought-provoking chapter. I really want to find out what happens next, especially with Mary now she knows the truth – unless Michael lied, but I don’t think he would have. Anyway, I’m so sorry again for being so late with this >.<
May 27, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Aww, I’m sorry to hear you haven’t felt well :( Hopefully you’re recovering quickly and are feeling better now. Anyway, yeah that was partially the intention behind the title. Well, that and I love the Pretty Little Liars theme song and couldn’t resist borrowing some of the lyrics from it :P That song fits the show so perfectly and it wasn’t even written specifically for the show. One of the actresses had heard it and suggested it for the theme. I’m getting off topic already :P This is one of the few times that I knew going into a chapter like this that everyone would make it out alive. Typically I have other ideas of things I’d like to do or ways I’d like to see the story go, so I’m never quite sure if everyone will survive. This time though I’ve planned ahead all the way to the final chapter, so I knew we wouldn’t be losing anyone here. Don’t get comfortable though, I could just be luring you into a false sense of security or something :P The bit at the end with JTG’s message to Tony is… complicated. There are two principles to this story that need to be remembered. The first is that everyone has a secret, and the second is almost nothing is exactly as it first appears. (This should not be taken as confirmation that Tony does, in fact, have shape-shifting abilities :P) A lot more happened on Labor Day than has been revealed and it involved a lot more people than the girls know about. JTG knows, however. Of course, JTG knows everything :P You know, I'm just going to leave whether or not Tony and JTG are in cahoots (I agree, that's an awesome word xD) entirely up to your imagination for now. It's certainly possible and I'm interested to see what other related theories you can come up with, so please, by all means, ramble away :)
Hahahaha, yes! A compliment for Michael at last xD One day, you will love him. I will make it happen. I'm confident in my ability to successfully succeed! :P I didn’t set out to give Michael this hero moment and he almost didn’t get it. At first, I really liked the idea of Snow managing to talk Tony down. Obviously Snow rescuing herself instead of needing to be rescued is something I like to see instead of a damsel in distress sort of scene. In this case though, knowing all of Tony’s backstory, it just didn’t make a lot of sense that she’d be able to do that. It didn’t fit with who Tony is so in the end Michael got to be a badass. He’s not complaining :P Lol, I’m sorry! I know that was mean, but it’s just not the time for Michael's secrets to come out. You’re right that it is coming but I’ll not say when. To be honest, I was surprised by Michael telling Mary too. I spent a ton of time planning out exactly what was going to happen over the next ten chapters and Michael never told her. Then I get to their conversation and it just felt like the right time for him to tell her. Of course, that left me with the problem of whether or not I should also tell the audience and I really did consider it. But like I said, this just isn’t the time. That’s a big reveal. I mean a big, big reveal. Easily in the top 3 of the whole story and I already know when and how it’ll all come out, so sadly it has to wait for a later chapter. But yeah, you’re right. Michael has handled this all really badly no matter his intentions or how he’s behaving now. Obviously Michael is changing and I’d say Snow has been instrumental in that change, but he’s still done bad things and has behaved like an absolute douchebag regardless of the reasons why.
I swear, I had more trouble with Snow and Tony’s conversations than I did with anything else. Try as I might, it never felt genuine to me. It all felt forced and it didn’t flow properly. It took me ages to get something that even remotely approached what I was going for. It also required me to change Tony quite drastically. At first, he was quite a bit more a pervert in regards to Snow. He does have a fetish for underage girls after all, so it seemed fitting. I guess I can’t write child molestation scenes properly (which is a really weird thing to be upset about) because instead of feeling disturbing and creepy, it was just really awkward and Tony felt too much like a cartoon villain instead of a pedophile. But yes, Tony’s scars are certainly real and there’s still a lot of things about Tony that we don’t yet know. While he's clearly not a good guy, something surely drove him to be the way he is so I'd say your theory is a pretty good one. As with a lot of things, it'll be a while before all of Tony's secrets come out. I've got a lot of other things to deal with before I get to Tony. A lot of other things :P As for what Mary will do, well I'll keep that a surprise for now, but it will have a pretty significant effect on her moving forward. Her world has been rocked, let's leave it at that. Also, Michael didn't lie. He told her the absolute, honest to God, truth. That's not to say he told her every secret he has, he didn't, but the parts that had to do with Mary were all true. Anyway, thanks so much for the comment :) And please, don't worry about being a little late. I just hope you're feeling better now :)
May 27, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 52 Reply
Steven’s plan of backtracking JTG’s texts has me worried. I’m still rather suspicious of him, and if I’m right and he is JTG then this can only lead to something bad for the rest of the gang. I mean, assuming that theory is correct, he could pretend to be successful and “find” where she was when she sent the texts, or something like that. Then say he tells them a particular place in the town was where she often texted from, he could send them there and place a trap as a part of his plan for them. Sorry if that doesn’t make sense, by the way. It’s getting late and I’m running on 5 hours of sleep as it is xD Anyway, if I’m wrong and he isn’t JTG then of course as he pointed out I highly doubt she’ll appreciate them trying to track her. And since we know she’s capable of murder, I’m more than a little worried about what she will do.
It was interesting to see how Mary has changed since Michael told her the truth and she found out magic is real. It was quite surprising, too – I mean, it’s hard to tell since we only really have their dialogue to go on, but it seems like a perception filter or something like that has been lifted in her mind, if she’s suddenly able to see a whole other world outside his window. At least, that’s what it sounded like. Maybe she only saw something small, it’s hard to tell at this point :P Anyway, I’m glad she told Michael that he should tell Snow about it directly. I mean, she’s completely right, whatever it is Snow will be much more willing to forgive if it comes from Michael himself instead of someone else. But still, I just get the feeling that this is not what will end up happening. I feel like JTG or someone else will get there first before Michael has a chance to tell her, and if that happens I’m not sure if she will forgive him at all. Which may be a good or a bad thing, I’m not sure yet :P
Anyway, as for that ending, I was certainly surprised to see Rachel enter the scene so soon, and in such a dramatic way too :P I knew she’d show up eventually to try and get revenge for Miranda, but I thought it wouldn’t be for a while. Still, not only am I very worried for Snow, I’m really curious to see what happens next and if she falls for Snow’s façade. It’s a clever ruse to pretend she’s JTG to gain Rachel’s trust (or her fear :P) so if she can pull it off convincingly I can see this possibly ending in a positive outcome. But then, we still know next to nothing about Rachel so it’s hard to tell if she will fall for it or realise Snow is lying. Either way, considering their location I really hope Snowfall doesn’t become a literal title :( And assuming Snow does make it out alive, I hope the situation ends with a positive outcome in some way, since the group needs that more than ever right now. And I hope that Rachel doesn’t die either, because since I’m 95% sure she isn’t secretly JTG I don’t think she’s a bad person. As far as I know, she just wants justice for her daughter. But I don’t know, I just get the feeling that one of them won’t survive and if that happens my bet would be that she is the one who falls of the cliff/gets shot. Anyway, regardless I’m definitely going to be very worried for Snow and a little bit for Rachel until the next chapter.
And lastly, I applaud your chapter title :P Now I have Victorious stuck in my head, but that’s ok because it’s such a great song xD
July 3, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks so much for commenting :) That theory makes quite a lot of sense, actually (But seriously, go to bed :P 5 hours of sleep can't be good for you) Poor Steven is coming off as very suspicious lately, isn't he? JTG is working on ending the game, so Steven faking tracing JTG's phone to lead the others into a finale face off seems logical. But if Steven isn't JTG, she won't be at all happy that he's trying to track her down. She's been completely invisible this entire time so if Steven starts to close in on her, particularly so close to the end of her game, she will not be pleased.
Heh, Mary's had her entire perception of the world blown into a million pieces over the course of a ten minute car ride. There's an entirely new world open to her now and she doesn't quite know what to do with it. A perception filter is a pretty good way to describe what has happened to Mary, actually. Mortals are incapable of seeing and interacting with the magical realm unless someone with magic grants them the ability. Basically, a mortal could walk past an entire city and never even know it was there. It's not like Hogwarts where you see a derelict building, there's just literally nothing there. Mary now has the ability to see and touch the magical realm. Oh, and what she saw out of Michael's window was quite sizable, let's just leave it at that. It was not, necessarily, a magical city. That was just an example. Probably :P Michael really should tell Snow the truth, no doubt. Obviously, Snow's going to be really angry no matter who tells her, but she would be more likely to forgive him if he's upfront and honest with her. If she finds out through anyone else, I really don't quite know what she'll do. I really need to make a decision on that, but I doubt I'll settle on her reaction until I sit down to write that particular chapter. Indecisiveness strikes again :P
Ah, the ending. I hadn't intended to end the chapter there because obviously Snow is lying about being JTG so I knew there was no way I was going to fool anyone into thinking she is. Still, ending on that line was too enticing to resist and it felt better, I thought, to not introduce the conflict with Rachel and resolve it in the same chapter. In the beginning, Rachel wasn't supposed to pop up in this chapter at all. She was going to first appear at the end of 53 and we'd resolve the situation in 54. The problem came up that in order to fit everything in properly I'd almost have to bump it out to 61 chapters, which I don't want to do. As such, Rachel was tossed into the end of this one instead. Snow's ruse is actually something I've wanted to talk about for a long time, but haven't been able to until now. This storyline is based upon my original plan for who JTG was going to be. JTG really was going to be Snow. The idea was that Snow had some sort of multiple personality disorder. So we have the Snow that we follow through the story and then we have this other person that's doing all of the JTG stuff. Snow would essentially black out, do these things, then become herself again with no memory of what she'd done. One of the reasons why Snow blacked out on the night of Sara's murder was because at the time I was still deciding on exactly what I was going to do and so I needed to write myself a way out of either situation. Ultimately, the idea of Snow being JTG, while interesting, seemed off and was scrapped before JTG ever appeared in the story. Even so, I do still like the idea and wanted to fit it in somewhere so here it is. I get to write Evil Snow for a chapter or two :P Will her plan work? Well, that remains to be seen, especially if Rachel knows more about JTG than she's let on. Snow is certainly going to try, either way. Oh, right, this is this chapter! One second... ah yes, here it is. "Hmm, now you’re making me nervous that Snow is going to fall off a cliff or something. I hope that doesn’t happen. I love puns, but I don’t think my heart could take it if you went the full way with this one." -Genevieve Middleton, January 31st, 2017. You do not know how much I giggled after you said that xD I knew Snow was going to end up on the edge of Lookout Point (and maybe over the edge :P) so the timing of that was just about perfect. Anyway, you make a good point about Rachel. She seems to just be a mother that wants justice for her daughter. Her own murderous justice that doesn't abide by any sort of law, but justice nonetheless. If that's true, she doesn't deserve to die. After all, Snow and the gang are guilty and Miranda does deserve justice. Not Rachel's style, but, well, you know.
Hahahahaha, sorry about that xD I was kind of desperate for a chapter title and it seemed to fit Snow's crazy plan to pretend to be JTG. That, and it sort of ties back into my idea that Snow would have a mental disorder way back when. I had planned on ending my string of song lyrics as titles that's been going on since 47 with this chapter, but I suppose one more won't hurt :P
July 3, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 53 Reply
Well, I must say I’m exceptionally glad that both Snow and Rachel survived their inevitable fall :P You had me pretty worried after the last chapter (and the title of this one :P) so I went in expecting the worst. Anyway, I’m happy they managed to both come out of this relatively unharmed. You did a really good job of maintaining the tension throughout the chapter, and because of that I didn’t feel like Snow was truly safe right until the very end. I have to say, though, Snow should consider a career as an actress xD She makes a good JTG :P Anyway, I was very worried throughout that period of time, wondering if Rachel would buy her act or not. I liked how she kind of remained on the fence about it the whole time, sort of convinced but at the same time, never truly sure. It was more interesting than if she’d seen through it, or if she’d been completely convinced right away.
Anyway, I liked the characterisation of Rachel in this chapter. I like her a lot. I’m not really sure why, because even though she was nice at the end, she spent the first half of the chapter holding Snow at gunpoint and then tackled her off a cliff :P Maybe it’s because she has the same name as my twin so I keep thinking of her even though they’re nothing alike xD Plus, I’m not the biggest fan of heights either so I was definitely feeling for her when she and Snow were hanging on that branch. Anyway, I find her a really interesting character and I was happy to see that she and Snow managed to end their confrontation peacefully at the end. It wasn’t what I expected, and it was nice to see Snow with a bit of hope, too. I still can’t completely rule Rachel out as JTG (or part of the team, at least) but at this point I’d be extremely surprised if she turned out to be involved.
I have to say, I was quite surprised that Snow told Rachel about Tony and Miranda. I mean, it makes perfect sense she would tell her (especially considering her JTG guise) but it’s just not something I really thought of, for some reason. But regardless, I felt very sorry for Rachel during that scene :/ I can only imagine how horrible to learn something like that had happened right under your nose. I’m also very curious to see what Rachel will do now she knows the truth. It doesn’t sound like she’s going to tell the police (not yet, anyway) and I’m not sure what else she could be planning right now. I’m also curious about all that surveillance equipment too, and how it will impact the story from now. Surely Snow and Co. will use it at some point, given that Rachel offered it up in this chapter. I hope they’ll be able to use it to somehow get JTG on camera and therefore figure out who she is, but… Well, considering JTG knew exactly where Rachel and Snow were and even threw them that rope, it’s clear she was somehow watching them and probably followed them back to Michael’s house. Therefore she probably knows about that conversation too, so she might be able to use it to get them focusing on the wrong person again or something like that :/
Anyway, all this new information about Tony, Sara’s stepdad and what they were doing on Labour Day was very interesting too. I’m really curious to find out what happened because right now I’m really finding it difficult to piece together. It seems likely now that Tony was planning to kill Miranda that night, regardless of whether he actually ended up being involved with her murder or not. But how that relates to whatever he was doing with Rick is unclear, if they are related at all. This chapter raised so many questions and I’m really looking forward to seeing what the answers are, because at the moment I’m not having much success forming any legitimate theories :P Anyway, overall this was a really tense, well-written chapter with lots of new mysteries. I’m eager to read the next chapter and see what happens next.
July 26, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for the comment :) Hehe, I imagine them falling was a bit anticlimactic at this point, huh? :P And also, I lied. This is the last chapter I’m going to use song lyrics for the title. Seriously, I’m done :P I just couldn’t resist with that one for obvious reasons. Also, I felt like I typed the word fall/fell about 6 million times in this chapter, so there’s that too. And who doesn't like that song, anyway? She's a good girl, loves her mama. Loves Jesus and America too. She's a good girl, crazy 'bout Elvis. Loves horses and her boyfriend too. Why am I sitting here typing out song lyrics? Yeah, I'm losing it. Anyway, I’m glad you thought the tension and whatnot was ok and that Snow managed to make a convincing JTG. I was not at all confident that Snow’s portrayal of JTG would be believable in the least. Given that she’s quite obviously lying and the reader knows it, I wasn’t sure how convincing she would be. But yeah, that’s one thing I knew I wanted to do for sure with Rachel not quite believing but also not quite dismissing Snow’s act. There were a number of reasons why, one of which was as you say it’s more interesting than the other way, but also neither of the other ways seemed all that believable. Snow didn't really have enough proof to outright convince her, but she's convincing enough to make Rachel unsure.
Well, I’m glad you like Rachel although I have to say I didn’t make any attempt whatsoever to make her likable. It wasn’t even in the back of my mind to try to make her likable :P In fact, she was never supposed to survive the chapter to begin with. I’d always expected her to fall to her death much like Miranda had, it was supposed to be poetic or something. But when I went to write it the whole thing just felt really wrong. So I had to do a pretty major rewrite so Rachel could survive, which changed a lot of stuff :P But regardless, I’m glad she’s likable. I don’t have the slightest clue what I’m going to do with her now, of course, but she’s still around xD You know, that’s another reason why I wanted to keep Rachel alive; to let her and Snow end their conflict peacefully. I figured that might be pretty unexpected considering Snow’s track record thus far, and also because Rachel is neither crazy nor a bad person. She’s just a mom who had her daughter taken from her, so she has good reasons for the things she does even if they aren’t very nice things :P It just felt really bad to kill her when she’s probably one of the characters that deserves it the least.
I went back and forth for a long time over whether Snow should tell Rachel about Tony and Miranda. I had a version where she doesn’t tell her that I planned on using, but once again it never felt right when I tried to let them resolve the conflict peacefully. With Snow telling her, the information sort of breaks her. It kind of kills her desire for revenge in a way. Without that, Rachel’s change of heart didn’t quite fit. As for what Rachel will do now that she knows, well like I said before, I have no idea xD I have no immediate plans for Rachel at the moment so I doubt we’ll see much of her until the sequel because I really don’t have the space to fit her in and I need time to figure out what sort of trouble she can get herself into. Plus, I already know what Tony will be doing up through the ending, so I imagine Rachel will just be plotting her revenge against Tony over these next few chapters. Heh, I think it’s pretty safe to say that JTG is serious when she says she knows everything, so yeah she probably knows all about Rachel’s offer. JTG sees all :P
I think I’ve said it before (I honestly can’t remember :P) but so much more happened on Labor Day than has been revealed. It would be pretty difficult, approaching impossible to put all the pieces together. Mainly because you’re assembling the puzzle with only half of the pieces and the picture on the box belongs to a completely different puzzle xD If you did manage to figure it all out, I’d be extremely impressed. Not because I’m that good of a mystery writer or that you’re not more than capable of figuring out what I’m up to but because there’s just not enough information out there to do so. I don’t think :P Thanks again for commenting :)
July 26, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 54 Reply
Okay, you need to stop doing this to me. I am but a poor maiden who cannot take this cruel teasing anymore xD Finally, Snow is sent something that will change things forever between her and Michael and yet of course I have to wait until a future chapter to find out :P Although who knows? Perhaps the video is something else entirely and has nothing to do with the Michael and Mary thing at all and I’m being trolled even more than I realise :P Still, despite her interrupting Snow seeing that video, I liked the short scene between Ariana and Snow, although of course it was very sad :( It highlighted something I hadn’t really thought about, which is that even if the JTG situation/Michael’s war or whatever it is that’s coming gets resolved peacefully, there’s still a lot of things in Snow’s life that won’t be resolved – like Ariana’s impending illness and death, and the emotional effect all of the current events will have on them.
Anyway, onto Steven’s findings. To say I’m nervous about this is an understatement. He’s still the person I’m most suspicious of, and if I’m right, then I’m extremely worried for Jackson. Particularly since at the moment I feel like Jackson is the most expendable of the gang (although of course I don’t really know enough to form a proper assessment on this) so if anyone dies in the next few chapters my bet’s on him. Anyway, it just seems like if he is JTG, he’s practically controlling where they go right now (whilst not giving them too much info, like an exact location, which would seem suspicious) which fits perfectly to her M.O.. But of course, if JTG isn’t Steven then she’s probably just using the fact he’s been trying to track her to get them in the right place. So in that case, he’d be her pawn rather than the instigator. Either way, I’m scared :P
The ending with Gwen was surprising, to say the very least. I wasn’t expecting to find out more about her so soon, so that made me happy. First, I’m rather ashamed to admit I never considered that Gwen was a werewolf (Sorry, moonlight intolerant :P). Here I was, all convinced she was a chimera-like person infused with a dog’s DNA or something like that, and yet I never considered werewolf, which is such a fantasy classic. Duh Gen :P And secondly, I never considered Gwen being Michael’s sister, or even remotely related to him at all, so that was a big surprise. I’m curious to see how Snow and the gang react to that if/when they find out about that. And also, I liked the extra information given about the Coven, and Michael’s family too. I wonder how his father died, though. I don’t know, I feel like that will be important. Missing parents are always important! :P Ahem. I may have been watching too many movies xD Perhaps he just died of something completely natural. Anyway, I want to learn more about Gwen and Michael’s mother, too. I wonder why Gwen doesn’t like her. I mean, it sounds to me like she sacrificed a lot to keep Gwen safe from the Coven and their dad, but then Gwen says she hates her. Is she just being a rebellious teenager, or is there something else going on that I don’t know about? Or both? :P I guess I will just have to wait to find out. Anyway, overall this was a really good chapter. There were a lot of interesting relevations and characters going places and given the last few paragraph’s from Snow’s POV I can tell it’s going to be a race to the finish from here. I can only sit here and hope in vain that everyone gets out of the next few chapters unscathed.
Anyway, before I go, Stark Outfitting and Winter Gear xD That’s a name that’s up there with Game of Scones :P The residents of Mistbrook Falls are clearly GoT fans xD Speaking of, I watched the season 7 finale earlier today. I won’t say anything in case you haven’t seen it yet, but eeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!! :P
August 28, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Hey, thanks for the comment :) Aww, but I so enjoy a little teasing every now and again xD Well, if its any consolation, you won’t have to wait too long before you find out what was in that text. I do love my secrets, but we’re getting down to the wire so things have to start being revealed very soon indeed. I’d considered having Snow watch the video in this chapter, but that did bad things with the very structured timeline I’ve put together, so it had to be put off until later. But like I said, very soon. The scene with Snow and Ariana was a last minute addition. After this chapter I’m going to be incredibly pressed for space to fit things in and I knew I wanted to have a scene with the two of them so I slid it in here. But yes, you’re right that whatever happens with JTG and Michael, Snow is still living in a very dark place. Even if JTG were caught tomorrow, Snow’s still facing the inevitable loss of her mother and the emotional scars of being tormented for months by a psychopath :/ Whatever happens, I wouldn’t expect Snow’s life to suddenly be a happy place anytime soon.
To say that Jackson is the most expendable is a perfectly valid feeling to have in my opinion. I haven’t done much with him thus far, so if he were to die it wouldn’t necessarily be the most catastrophic loss in the world. It would be for his friends, obviously, but as far as losing a character he isn’t exactly a prominent figure. And if he really is going up to the mines with JTG, you’re right to worry about him. As for Steven, I’m just not going to comment :P There’s not much I can say without spoiling whether he is or isn’t JTG, so I’m going to keep my mouth shut. But I will say that you’re right on that point. He’s likely either a pawn or the instigator, so you probably should be scared regardless :P
Hehe, no, don’t call her a werewolf. No no, that’s very insensitive :P Honestly, the fact that werewolves are such a fantasy classic is the reason I almost didn’t do it. I spent a lot of time (I mean, I lot of time building this fantasy world that Michael/Gwen/Zoe/Sienna/etc inhabit and for the longest time I wasn’t really sure just how deep into the fantasy pool I wanted to dive. I already had witches, but did I want werewolves? Do vampires exist in this world? Are there dragons? Other races like Orcs or Elves? I had a list pages and pages long with questions like that I had to answer. Fantasy isn’t exactly my specialty and this will be my first true foray into it, so suffice to say I’m rather nervous :P I didn’t just want to say “Oh look! Magic! Dragons! Castles! Yay!” There needs to be a story and history to all of it. With scifi, I can do that in a matter of a few days. With fantasy… yeah, not so much :P But yes, enough of that rambling. Gwen is most definitely a werewolf. Oh, right! I almost forgot that there was a video I was supposed to tell you about. Before I saw this video, Gwen was quite a bit different. She was very subdued and quiet and shy. Obviously, she’s far from that now xD Here is the link if you want to watch it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UqmnS4FQcAk&t=787s
If that doesn’t work, and I always manage to screw up when trying to post a link so it probably won’t, just search for Mr Massagy Markiplier on Youtube. The video in question is Part 1 and the section you’re looking for starts around 7:40 into the video. It’s… yeah, it’s weird, but the character in that video (and others featuring the same video game, which also explain Gwen’s fascination with squirrels :P) was largely responsible for Gwen’s personality now :P Just… ignore the sexual innuendos, that’s all I’m saying :P But anyway, I’m not really surprised that you didn’t expect Gwen was Michael’s sister. That’s something I haven’t even hinted at, although I had intended to. I planned on mentioning that Riley had a twin sister, but I realized that would lead to awkward questions about where she was and I didn’t want to have to answer those questions, so it comes as kind of a surprise now. As for Gwen and Michael’s mother, well they have a complicated history :P Some of it is there in the chapter when Gwen says her mother came to resent her after she was forced to give up so much to protect her. There’s more to it, of course, but that’s part of it for sure. Of course, another part is that Gwen really is just being a bit of a rebellious teenager :P Oh, and as for their father… well, we’ll get to that someday :P His death is important, but not necessarily for events happening now. Yeah, we’ll get to all that later on. Just… there’s nothing to see here. Move along, move along :P
Hahaha, I didn’t set out to name all of the businesses in town after Game of Thrones. They were meant to be named after anything movie/TV/book based that I found funny/fitting. So far, it’s all been Game of Thrones though :P Even the school’s football team is called the Mistbrook Falls Direwolves :P As for the season 7 finale, yes, I’ve seen it. There’s no HBO on this boat, but we do have internet so we streamed the finale last night. Eeeeeeeep, I feel, is perfectly fitting a description as I can come up with :P I mean, even if we ignore everything else that happened in that episode, a frickin’ ice dragon blew a hole in the Wall! With everything else that happened, it made for one heck of a season ender. I’m not going to go over everything here seeing as I could talk about the finale for ages and Claire wants me to go swimming with her (There are pools on this ship. I mean, why? Isn’t the point to keep water outside of the boat? It makes no sense, I say xD) so I’ll save my comments for the PM except to say that I’ve never been quite as excited for a new season of GoT as I am after this episode. Oh, but did they have to have the Dany/Jon scene there at the end take place with a casual discussion reminding us all just how related they are playing on top of it? I mean, really! :P
August 28, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 55 Reply
Hehe, well in this chapter you certainly showed your talent at mood whiplashing xD It was a nice moment between Jacob and Clara, filled with hope and optimism that he might recover, only for Clara to suddenly get that call and have her life (as well as her friends) plunged into possible doom in the very next moment. I’m very nervous but curious to see what happens with JTG. I’m worried for all of them, but I’m still excited to see what happens because it feels like we’ll finally get a lot of answers I’ve been waiting for a long time for – who JTG is, and what her motives against the group are., etc And I’ll quietly hope everyone gets out of this encounter unscathed, but somehow I just don’t see that happening :/ Anyway, I’ve already read the next chapter so I know what happens with Snow finally finding out about Michael raping Mary, so I’ll save my thoughts about that until the next comment. Originally, I was going to say how curious I was to read the next chapter and see what her reaction is, and that I was mad at you for teasing me again without providing the answers xD Still, I think you built up to that final line well, leaving us in suspense for a while before revealing that Snow did indeed watch the video and needs answers.
I was surprised to see Divinity and Sienna at the end there, even though it was only for a moment. I fully didn’t expect them to appear until later on. I’m a little confused, though, since I thought Divinity was the entire country/continent/world, etc, rather than one city. But I guess that was just me jumping to conclusions xD Still, I’m curious about where this city and Sienna’s world are. Is it a parallel world, or is it on Earth but hidden from view like Stonehaven? I think a parallel world is more likely, but even so, I’m curious to learn more about it. Sienna isn’t what I expected either. I don’t know why, but even though I knew almost nothing about her I always imagined her as a brunette xD Still, she seems interesting and I’m really curious to see what happens in this possible war between the coven and Michael/Sienna and Co.
Anyway, overall, this was a very good chapter. You’re doing a really good job at building this climax and juggling the three storylines at once: JTG’s game, Snow and Michael’s confrontation, and the possible war with the coven. I’m impressed at the way they are all coming together and I can’t even tell what I’m most eager to read about.
September 2, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Hahaha, well it had been awhile since I’d gotten a chance to do a mood whiplash, so I took the opportunity xD I really can't resist sometimes :P Waiting a long time for answers is right. It doesn’t feel like that long to me, but when I happened to glance at the ‘Created’ date up there and realized this has been going now for just over three years I was pretty shocked. I do believe I’ve carried this on long enough without giving some answers, so we’re going to be getting to those answers fairly soon. Will I answer all of your questions? Will the answers be satisfying? Who knows :P Find out next time on Dragonball Z! Okay, just ignore that. Hell, maybe ignore me altogether today. I just got back home after being stuck in a Florida airport all night and a good portion of the day today so I’m sleepy and cranky :P Hehe, I knew when I was writing it that you’d be mad at me for teasing again xD I’d planned for that scene to be Snow watching the video and finding out what Michael did and then she’d confront him in the next chapter in a completely different (and decidedly more Kayla-ish) way. But I just didn’t like anything about any of that. Nothing I wrote worked the way I wanted it to, so I switched tactics and this is the result. I’ll admit that I’m not completely happy with it, but that’s mostly because I’d envisioned doing it the other way for years so I suppose that has a lot to do with it.
Heh, well, I was surprised to see Sienna and Divinity too :P I wasn’t planning on introducing either until the sequel, but with Snow’s part cut short I needed something else and it seemed like the perfect spot to slide Sienna in and give her a little introduction before she finally shows up properly later on. With Divinity, think of it sort of like King’s Landing I suppose only it’s a much nicer place to live than the capital of the Seven Kingdoms :P Divinity itself is a city, but there are lands and other, smaller cities/castles under its rule. I never really have made any attempt to make it clear that Divinity wasn’t something more than just a city so I’m not surprised you would reach the conclusion that it was. But yes, Sienna and Divinity are essentially in a parallel world. At least that’s how I’ve always thought of it, anyway. The Nine Realms have been mentioned before and Sienna’s world is one of them, our world is another. Obviously there are, well, nine of them :P We’ll get into it with more detail at some point in the future but for now it’s very safe to say that Divinity exists in a parallel world to our own. Lol, it’s funny you say that about Sienna being a brunette, because that’s exactly what she was xD However, I realized recently that I have an overabundance of dark haired characters and I really didn’t need to bring in another one, so Sienna gets to be unique and have vibrantly white hair. Why? I don’t know, just thought it would make her a little more interesting.
Well I’m glad you think I’m doing a good job juggling the storylines. It may seem that way in the finished product, but you should see me trying to keep in all straight while I’m writing :P I’m surprised I don’t have a wall like a conspiracy theorist with pictures and little pins with string linking everything together :P Hey, actually that might not be a bad idea xD The timing of all this madness took way more thought and planning than I expected, I must say. Anyway, thanks so much for commenting :)
September 2, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 56 Reply
Wow, this chapter is probably my favourite of the whole story so far. So many things were revealed and I didn’t expect to find out so much at once at any point in the near future, so I’m happy xD Firstly, I was right about why Michael raped Mary! That makes me happy because now even if I am horrendously wrong about every other theory I can say that I at least got one thing right :P Anyway, I was glad to get answers at last about Michael, and the information about Stonehaven, Sebastian, etc. etc. was all really interesting. I was surprised that Michael and Co. actually know what the demon’s human form is called, I thought the “He” they kept referring to was someone in disguise in the town. It’s interesting to learn what the thralls are too, and that they’re innocent. So I guess all those guys who kept staring at Snow weirdly are probably under his spell. But Emilia, though… I’m not sure about her, since before Zoe said she was stronger than most thralls. Perhaps she isn’t under his spell (or at least, not completely) and is working with him for her own reasons, whatever they may be.
Anyway, moving on to all the info revealed about Stonehaven/the Dawnguard. There was so much to take in but I found it all really interesting and I look forward to seeing more, of Stonehaven especially. I like how you weaved the fantasy stuff into real-world history with the library of Alexandria. There was a lot of information to disperse and you did it well, having Snow there to question and comment so it didn’t turn into a very long-winded monologue for Michael. Although, the information was so interesting I probably wouldn’t have cared if that was the case, but still xD Anyway, I’m curious about Snow’s seemingly extra-magical gift, even though Michael claims she has no magic blood. I’m wondering if he’s actually wrong about that, and she does have some magic in her family tree somewhere. Or maybe, like he thinks, she is something else entirely. Either way, I’m curious to find out. And I feel kind of mean for saying this, but I’m glad that Snow and Michael are (for now) broken up. If they hadn’t it would have seemed very out of place, because regardless of his intentions, as Snow says he still raped Mary and lied to both of them. She’s exactly right, regardless of why he and Emily could have told Mary everything from the beginning and then let her make her own choice. Still, despite the fact I feel their break-up had to happen I think you really handled the emotions well throughout that scene and I felt really sorry for both of them. More for Snow than Michael, but I did feel a bit of pity for him as well even though he has no-one to blame but himself.
Finally, I can say with great certainty that I absolutely did not expect Sara to show up there at the end, and alive to boot. When she appeared before, I fully thought she was some variation on a Guide. And even if I had suspected that she somehow survived, I would never would have expected her to be hiding out at Michael’s. I suppose this means she was “S” after all. Still, if Sara didn’t die, then who/what was the doppelganger in her coffin? My first thought was that it could be a magically enhanced replica of her body, created by Michael or maybe Zoe. Or maybe Sara has a secret evil/not so evil twin :P Still, I’m curious as to how Michael came to be harbouring her in his mansion. Clearly someone wanted to kill Sara, and presumably they were convinced that they did so. And although she could very well be bluffing, considering that JTG has referred to Sara as being dead in the past I’m wondering if this is something even she didn’t know about. Anyway, overall, like I said before this was a really good chapter. There was so much information revealed, so much I didn’t expect, and I’m really eager to see what happens next and how it effects all the other plotlines going on right now. I mean, when Clara gets around to calling/visiting Snow and telling her about JTG, how will she act now she knows Sara is still alive? Regardless, I’m going to be waiting very eagerly for the next chapter.
September 2, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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All I want to say about this is finally xD Ah, I can breathe a big sigh of relief now that this chapter is out there. So many secrets are finally out and I don’t have to worry about keeping them anymore. It’s so nice. When I clicked Add Chapter, I just leaned back and in my chair and relished in the feeling of getting rid of some of these secrets. It’s about time. Anyway, I’m really glad you enjoyed this chapter. Despite my feeling of relief, it’s still a scary chapter. Three years of secrets and subtle hints and build up finally coming to fruition is downright terrifying. If the answers aren’t at least somewhat satisfying then people like yourself who have stuck with me since the beginning (thanks for that, by the way :D) would have wasted three years of their lives otherwise. Ah yes, you were absolutely right about why Michael raped Mary. You were also right about it being a supernatural being that was responsible for the murders mentioned way back in… I think chapter 5? I’m too lazy to go check, but I told that story ages ago and I remember you guessing correctly right off the bat, so good job! That’s two of your theories proven correct. Also, the first time Alexandria was mentioned you said your first thought was of the city in Egypt, so you were pretty darn close with that as well. You’re building up a nice track record of figuring out what I’m up to :P Heh… um, okay, so the main reason they kept referring to Sebastian as ‘he’ is mostly because for the longest time I couldn’t pick a name for him. No, really. I’m serious :P After awhile it almost became a running joke and by the time I figured out what his name would be it seemed weird to just toss it in randomly so I saved it for the reveal of everything else. As for the thralls, yes, they’re innocent and the guys that kept staring at Snow are working for Sebastian completely against their will. They’re actually really nice people when they aren’t being forcefully controlled by a demonic hell-beast :P Now as for Emilia, she is definitely different I can say that. Zoe mentioned once that a normal thrall cannot use magic. Emilia clearly can. That doesn’t necessarily mean Emilia isn’t still a thrall, but then I suppose it doesn’t mean she is one either. Teased enough yet xD
You know, that was my second biggest fear about this chapter. Essentially, it’s a massive exposition dump. It’s just Michael talking and telling this story about what the Dawnguard is, what they do, etc. and even if the information is interesting that can still get boring pretty quickly so I’m glad you didn’t find it to be so. Combining the fantasy with real world history was something I knew I wanted to do from the moment I settled on the idea that there would be fantasy elements in this. I’ve always been fascinated by the Library of Alexandria and what happened to it, so it seemed like a good launching point for something and this is what it turned into. That, of course, led me to thinking of so many other historical events that the Dawnguard could have had a hand in. Once I knew what it was that the Dawnguard did (saving the world from dangerous magic and whatnot) there were all sorts of places I could go and things I could do. For example, why can no one find the Ark of the Covenant? The Dawnguard have it xD No, that’s not a spoiler and it will never be important whatsoever. Well despite the fact that I’ve been writing these characters for years now, we still know next to nothing about Snow/Ariana’s family so it’s certainly possible that they have magic in their blood from somewhere in their family line. It’s certainly possible to have magic in your blood and not realize it, I’ll say that much. I don’t think you should feel mean at all for saying that about Snow and Michael. You’re absolutely right about it, and I agree that if they hadn’t broken up it would have just felt really wrong. I knew all along that this would be the end of their relationship, at least for now. Obviously Snow still very much loves him but all she can see at the moment is the betrayal and the lies and of course the fact that he raped Mary. And there’s also the fact that he’s known all along that Sara was very much alive and well and kept that from her as well. Suffice to say Snow has plenty of reasons to want nothing to do with him right now, so sadly their relationship had to end. Like you say, regardless of Michael’s intentions what he did was a really terrible thing. So even though Mary has forgiven him and they’ve somewhat worked things out between them, there were still better ways to go about things. We’ll get to why he was willing to go to such extremes to protect Mary later on, but I promise there is a reason. But yeah, I’m kind of sad to reach this point because I do like the two of them together, but it had to happen. I don’t really know at the moment whether or not they’ll get back together at some point in the future or not. It’s definitely a possibility, but I can’t say for sure right now. If they do, it won’t be for a very long time. Mary might have forgiven Michael, but Snow is far away from doing so. Finding out his motives for raping Mary helped soothe Snow somewhat since she knows he’s not this horrible, vile monster that did it just for fun, but she’s still extremely pissed at him. That said, their relationship isn’t completely beyond repair at some point down the road. Also, I’m glad you think the emotions are okay in this. That’s another area that bothers me a bit, really. I feel like Snow isn’t angry enough. I mean, I scrapped the idea that Snow would basically pull a Kayla and shove a gun in his face because even though that was my original plan as Snow developed as a character she just never has had that type of demeanor. It seemed really out of character for her to fly into a rage and threaten him like that. We’ve never seen Snow get really angry, but I don’t feel she’s angry enough in this chapter. Then again, I was trying to contrast her anger with her wonder at what she’s seeing. Her mind is being blown in this chapter, so there was a lot of back and forth over how much anger she could hold onto while learning about magic and discovering that she’s got this ability that she doesn’t understand. Maybe it’s just me nitpicking, but I’m happy you think it’s okay regardless :)
Ah yes, the biggest change this story has yet seen. Sara is most definitely alive. I think it might be my best kept secret because as of yet no one has ever told me they thought Sara was still alive. Everyone I’ve spoken to thought she was supernatural in some way. But no, Sara survived her attack and is just as human as she was way back then. I never really hinted toward her being alive much either, honestly. I did once during her first conversation with Snow when she appears in her bedroom. Snow asks her if she knows who killed her and Sara replies with something along the lines of “I don’t know who stabbed me.” It’s very vague and I can’t imagine anyone picking up on that, but it’s in there. The only other hint was in the chapter titles, which would require so much attention that no one would do it. Back in Warehouse there were two chapters; one called What Kayla Did and the second was What Kayla Does. In this, there’s a chapter called What Sara Knew so if you follow the naming convention then at some point (in this case, the next chapter) there should be a chapter called What Sara Knows. I mean, that’s completely obvious, right? :P That was never really meant as a hint but that’s about as close as I ever came to it :P Actually, no, that’s not true. I can’t remember which chapter but at one point Snow discovers a half eaten bowl of cereal in Michael’s kitchen early in the morning. Michael claimed to have had a late night snack or something, but Snow found it odd. That was Sara. Still not really a hint, but there you have it. Anyway, Sara actually was supposed to die and that be that. I mentioned a long time ago that I changed something about this story that made me completely change a bunch of other stuff, and then did something else which made my first change irrelevant. This was that thing. Sara was meant to die, but I liked the idea of Sara and Snow together so much that I decided I wanted her to survive so I could keep that relationship around. So, Michael was changed into a good guy, the Dawnguard, Coven, magic, demons, etc were all invented, all to forge a path for Sara’s survival. And then Michael met Snow. After that, I realized that Sara and Snow were probably never going to be a thing again and so I literally created a detailed magical world for absolutely no reason :P Still, we have witches now so that’s cool, right? xD As for what/who is buried in Sara’s coffin; that’ll be answered in the next chapter along with a lot of other questions as well about how Sara survived and why she’s just been hanging out with Michael for a few months. Sara has quite the story to tell, I imagine. I do like the evil twin theory, but that’s venturing too far into Pretty Little Liars territory even for me :P Not that Sara being alive isn’t doing that anyway. PLL did the very same thing to a character once believed to be dead, so I’m screwed regardless. Anyway, I’m really rambling today, I know. I’ve kept so much of this secret for so long that I’ve really enjoyed being able to talk about it for once. I can’t imagine how I’ll feel once I finally let the JTG secret out of the bag :P Anyway, I’m going to stop babbling now and go to bed. I seriously need a vacation from my vacation :P Thanks again so much for commenting. I really appreciate it :)
September 2, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 57 Reply
Well, I might have to take back what I said about the last chapter being the best of this series so far, because this one tops it. I mean, that ending. Need I say more? :P Even though Steven’s been my prime JTG suspect for quite a while now, a part of me never thought I’d actually be right, so I’m happy xD And I feel bad for feeling happy, since obviously Steven being JTG is a huge betrayal for all of them, plus he’s pointing a gun at Clara and all, but I can’t help myself :P Anyway, I think the whole lead up to the reveal, with the intermixing of Clara and Snow’s POV, was really well done. I was a bit confused at first when Clara’s part of the story was in italics, since you’ve never done that before, but I got over it pretty quickly and I think the way you interwove the two scenes at the end really added to the suspense and eventual reveal. I’m really excited to see what happens next, and what will be revealed. One thing I’m very curious about is why Steven targeted Jackson. I mean, I have an idea of his motives for targeting the girls (although I think it’s very likely there’s more to it than I know right now), but Jackson… I don’t have any idea what he could’ve done to be stalked this way. I feel bad for him regardless, since out of all of them Jackson was probably the closest to Steven so I feel like this will hit him the hardest, presuming he survives (he’s still my no. 1 suspect to die). I’m not sure Steven is the one who tried to kill Sara, though. He seems a clear choice, since we know he was at that party and obviously he was stalking her beforehand, but I feel like it might’ve been someone involved with Tony and Co. who stabbed her rather than JTG. I suppose what I’m trying to say is that I wouldn’t be surprised if Steven confesses to her ‘murder’ in the near future, but I also wouldn’t be surprised if he says it wasn’t him because I don’t feel like it’s JTG’s style to kill her in that way. He’s gone to all this effort to arrange this confrontation with Clara and Co. in private, making sure they know it was him after all this time. In comparison, attempting to kill Sara by stabbing her in the back so she never knows it was him seems a bit odd. But then, maybe the impersonalness of stabbing her in the back is what made him want a proper confrontation this time around, so like I said I still wouldn’t be surprised if it turns out he tried to kill her after all. Sorry about that confusing mess of an explanation xD Anyway, overall I think you did a really good job building the suspense up to this reveal. Even though I’d already been very suspicious of Steven, it was still surprising and made me want to go back and read parts of the story with JTG’s identity in mind. For example, that phone convo Sara had right before she dies makes so much more sense now :P And the phone thing too, which I admit I’d forgotten about until Snow mentioned it in this chapter.
Anyway, moving on from that, I should go back to the beginning. It was really interesting to read how Sara managed to survive, as well as learn more about this plot involving Tony and Co. and her dad. I hadn’t really given much thought to Sara’s dad before, and was surprised to learn he was a member of the Dawnguard too. I was also surprised to learn the reason Sara was working against Michael at the beginning was because she thought he was JTG. I’d always assumed it was because she mistakenly thought he was involved with Sebastian. Or, as I knew him back then, the virgin-killing serial killer/demon :P Anyway, because of that, her whole plan to drug Snow to see if Michael would molest her surprised me greatly, because it’s something I never considered at all. Regardless, I really felt for Snow during that scene :/ Whether Sara planned on letting Michael the Molester (if he was a supervillain, that would be his name :P) hurt Snow or not, the fact she’d even consider stooping that low is very telling. Of course, I do believe Sara when she says she’s sorry and that she’s changed, but even so, it’s a terrible thing for Snow to hear especially after Michael’s betrayal. And now she’s got Steven’s deceit to deal with too :/ Anyway, overall this was another really great chapter. So many interesting and surprising things were revealed and once again I find myself very eager to read what happens next :)
September 13, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Whew, well that’s certainly reassuring :) This chapter is easily the scariest I’ve ever written. I mean, this is the chapter. This is the chapter that the last 56 have been leading up to, so I’m quite glad you enjoyed it. Personally, I was terrified from beginning to end and even while editing I kept wondering if I shouldn’t make changes. My eternal indecisiveness was working overtime :P Anyway, you were right again! I have to say, you have been exceptionally good at predicting things. When I’m writing, it’s hard to tell how secretive I’m being or how other people will interpret things, so I never know if I’m being too obvious or not. When you guessed Steven, I had a miniature heart attack :P I knew after Sara’s laptop blew up that Steven would look suspicious, and there you were the second it happened being all suspicious of him :P I actually cut a couple of things that were meant to be hints that Steven was JTG because I was worried I’d been too obvious already and that no more hints were needed for anyone to figure it out. Oh, and then you go and correctly predict that Steven’s plan of backtracking JTG’s texts was just a trap for all of them :P I’d even gone to the trouble to outright show Steven sending a JTG text to Snow way back when just to hopefully divert attention away from him. I mean, where’s the best place to hide something? In plain sight, right? Anyway, you’re really good at this and I have to say I had a really hard time replying to those particular comments xD I felt like I was constantly just saying that I can neither confirm nor deny these allegations :P
I’m glad you thought the intermixing of Snow and Clara’s POV was okay. That wasn’t something I’d planned and it took more fiddling than I care to admit to get into some semblance of order. I wrote the chapter with Snow’s POV being first, so she figures out that Steven is JTG and then we switch to Clara and she figures it out. I wasn’t too happy with that though because if Snow figures it out first it kind of ruins the reveal at the end, but if Clara is first then Snow’s scene is completely redundant. That, and Clara’s POV really needed to be last because I felt the reveal of Steven himself ought to be the last part of the chapter. I’d seen TV shows do interweaving like that before, but I wasn’t at all sure how it would translate onto the page. I tried a couple of alternate versions (which were bad :P) before settling on this one. The problem I had was properly conveying what was happening and whose POV we were in without interrupting the flow of the chapter somehow. My sister came up with the brilliant idea of putting one of the POVs in italics. It’s not perfect, but it’s the best I could come up with. It does what I need it to do, but I’m not completely happy with it. Still, it was fun to try something new for once. I’m fairly stuck in my ways when it comes to writing, so it’s nice to do something different once in a while :P
Steven’s reasons (damn, I want that to be the title of the next chapter now :P) for pretty much all the stuff he’s done soon. I don’t want to say too much since it’s gone on this long so I’d hate to start spoiling things now. Suffice to say, Steven has his reasons for doing all of this and we’ll learn about them in the next chapter. A little off-topic, but I didn’t actually intend for the last few chapters to just shift from one explanation to another xD We go from Michael explaining magic, to Sara explaining how she survived, to Steven explaining why he’s a massive douche :P Anyway, you’re right that Jackson would be the hardest hit by Steven’s betrayal. Steven is/was one of his closest friends, and while the girls certainly consider him a friend they’ve never been really close friends. For Jackson though this is someone he trusted and has known/been friends with for years and years, only to be stabbed in the back by him. Albeit, less literally than Sara was stabbed in the back, but still :P Hmm, well now that’s an interesting theory indeed. The gang have been operating under the assumption that JTG tried to kill Sara (you have no idea how hard it is for me to type ‘tried to kill Sara’ :P I have apparently developed an automatic response to devastating spoilers and have to remind myself that I can say that now :P) but it’s certainly possible he didn’t. Sara was into a lot of dangerous stuff and she certainly wronged a few people, so who knows? Well, I do, but my strawberry glossed lips are sealed :P I’ll just leave it for you to theorize about for a while. Heh, I tend to want to do the same whenever a big mystery is revealed. The amount of Pretty Little Liars episodes that I’ve rewatched whenever A is revealed is staggering :P If you know Steven is JTG, things like Sara’s phone call make a lot more sense, as you said. There’s a few hints out there if you know what to look for. Not many since somebody is too smart for her own good :P But there’s a few. There’s one point where Snow and Jackson confront Steven to ask him if he’s JTG and his hands are noted to be in his pockets when a JTG text comes through. He was texting them with his phone in his pocket. If my sister can do that, so can he xD Oh, and there’s the title of chapter 33 Je Suis Une Amie, French for ‘I am a friend’. Not really a hint that Steven is JTG, but it was meant as a hint that JTG was a “friend” of the group. You know, I need to get better with my hints. These ones are crap :P Not that you needed them or anything anyway xD
I’m going to be honest. When I decided that Sara was going to survive, I had no idea all of the details of how it happened. It took quite a while to assemble all of the pieces and have it all make sense. I am, of course, assuming that it actually does all make sense :P Sara didn’t know anything about Sebastian until after her ‘death’. She and Michael got together and compared notes so that told Sara a lot more about her dad and Tony and everyone. Much like Snow and the gang, she was pretty wrong about everything she thought she knew. JTG played her, using Michael as a distraction just like Tony and Rachel ended up becoming. She went after Michael, only to find out that he wasn’t remotely involved with JTG and it very nearly got her killed in the process. Oh my God, I want to write some sort of alternate universe where the gang are superheroes and Michael is a supervillain because Michael the Molester is the best supervillain name ever. I doubt I’ll do it, but it would be glorious xD Don’t be surprised if someone calls him that at some point in the future. That’s just too good xD Anyway, yeah, regardless of whether or not Sara was going to let Snow be harmed, that was a really awful thing to do. Then again, it is pretty typical of Sara at that time and honestly back on that night, I don’t think she felt very sorry about it at all. The ends justified the means in her mind. That said though, this is a different Sara than the one we knew 50 chapters ago. She’s been through a lot and working with the Dawnguard has given her a new perspective on things. Still, deep down there’s some of the old Sara left in her so how that might affect her reintegrating with the girls is something I don’t even know yet. You’re right about poor Snow, as well. After Michael, learning what Sara had done to her, even if she was never in any danger, was a really hard blow for her to take. Throw Steven in as well on top of everything else and she’s not exactly in a good place. Not that she’s been in a good place at any point in recent memory, but she’s in even less of a good place now :P Thanks for commenting! :)
Haha, okay so I was just about to post this and I saw something on TV I thought you might find funny. I don’t even know what channel I have on right now because I’m not really watching it, but a commercial came on for a new Marvel superhero show. It’s called The Gifted and is about, well, people gifted with superpowers. Right after that one ended, another came on for another show. This one is called Snowfall. Unfortunately, that one is about cocaine :P Still, I found it really odd that both of those commercials popped up side by side like that.
September 14, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 58 Reply
Wow, so many things happened in this chapter that I really have no idea where to start :P Overall, I think it was a really well written chapter. The tension was there in every scene, and even though a large part of it was Snow being tortured I was rivetted the whole way through. I must admit, I was surprised that Steven knew about Sara being alive. It makes sense that he caught on when she was out visiting, but… I don’t know, for some reason I thought she’d evaded him :P Still, it seems I was right that JTG didn’t try and kill her though. I wonder if the real culprit knows she survived? Probably not, since I don’t think they’d be as observant as Steven, since, as he says, he knows everything :P Especially if I’m right and it’s Tony and Co. or someone related to them who’s responsible. Speaking of Tony, it was interesting to learn that he really did end up killing Miranda that night after her fall. I mean, I’d certainly suspected it before, but even so, I wasn’t close to being sure about it. Anyway, I’m very curious to see what will happen now with that revelation.
Another thing I think you did really well in this chapter was conveying Steven’s previously hidden JTG-side :P I mean, I knew Steven would have had to have been acting for all of his appearances thus far, but the sudden change in his personality in this chapter was rather jarring, in a good way. He's more manic than I expected. Not that it’s a bad thing, I was just surprised :P I expected him to be more cold and calculating, although he’s certainly got shades of that too. Anyway, as I said before, even though Snow was being tortured, those scenes were very well written and riveting even though it was horrible to see Snow go through all that :/ And of course, there were lots of other interesting revelations too. I was surprised to learn that Steven and Miranda were friends before. I’ll admit I’m rather curious about how that came about. Still, it certainly makes his motivations for stalking the girls believable and justified to a small extent. I mean, obviously stalking and psychologically and physically torturing people for months on end is never justified, but he’s completely right that they all covered up Sara murdering/manslaughtering Miranda when they could have told someone. It was interesting to learn why Steven targeted Jackson too, although… Well, I don’t want to say too much on it, because obviously it hasn’t been confirmed as true (although I don’t see why Steven would lie) but… I guess I find it a tad unrealistic that Snow never found out about his infidelity beforehand, if it really was to the scale Steven says it was. Because Mistbrook Falls is a small town (where presumably everyone goes to the same school) and the sheer number of girls Steven implies Jackson slept with makes me doubtful that he wouldn’t have already been caught out. That’s a lot of different people keeping the same secret, and if the rumour mill at Mistbrook High is anything like it was at my school, I find it doubtful that something as topical as one of the most popular girls in school’s boyfriend cheating on her en masse wouldn’t get back to Snow/Clara/one of the other girls. If it was 2, 3 or even 4 girls I could understand, but… I suppose like I said, the sheer number just seems a bit unrealistic to me. Not to mention, it would still seem just as douchebaggy of Jackson if there were less so there would be nothing lost in that regard :P
Anyway, I should really talk about that ending xD To say I’m worried is a big understatement. Especially for Jackson (despite the previously unknown douchebaggery (It’s totally a word :P)) since I don’t think Steven will die yet – I mean, there’s still so much we don’t know, so he surely can’t xD What does JTG stand for, for starters :P I never really considered it much before, but now I’m kind of curious. And also, before I go I have to mention this: “Has anyone ever told you the sexist thing about you is your voice?” I don’t usually point out typos but I spent an embarrassingly long amount of time confused about why Steven would possibly find Snow’s voice sexist before finally realising it was meant to be sexiest xD
October 22, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Thanks for commenting! :) Heh, JTG really does know everything :P It’s safe to assume that anything that’s revealed JTG probably already knows. If you remember back during the storm when Snow was stuck at Michael’s and JTG tried to kill her? Well, no one ever said he was just there for Snow :P JTG was there looking for Sara. But yeah, Steven found out Sara was still alive back when she snuck out of Stonehaven to visit the girls. You definitely were right that JTG didn’t try to kill Sara and I can safely say that the real culprit has no idea she survived. I hope you don’t consider that a spoiler :/ I mean, it’s never going to be questioned by the real culprit so there’s no point in me pretending otherwise. You know, I was going to hold onto that reveal about Tony killing Miranda for a while yet since I was revealing so much already, but it felt like it was time. Things are looking like they’ll be moving pretty quickly when we come back based on the storyboarding I’ve done so far so I wanted to get it out of the way here.
Steven’s JTG side is something I had to think about for a long time, so I’m glad you think its okay. His real personality is the result of a lot of different variables, but mainly it’s because he really does have a mental condition. Something along the lines of antisocial personality disorder was my original thought and it morphed from there. He’s certainly manic, that’s a good description. I think most of the planning and calculating is definitely done by the other JTG. Steven was always the wild one who often went above and beyond what the other JTG wanted to do. For example: Halloween. That was all Steven and the other JTG had nothing to do with it. Essentially, Steven had an impulsive streak and a tendency to go a bit rogue from time to time. But even though Steven did have a mental disorder, there’s more to it than that. I mean as you said Steven has been acting for all of his appearances up until now, but really he’s been acting his entire life. He’s been pretending that he’s okay. He’s pretended he fits in, that he’s confident and happy. He’s pretended to be heterosexual and so many other things and he’s never been able to just be himself, which leads us to Miranda. She was the first person to really see him for who he was and accept him. The story of Miranda and Steven’s friendship is something that could almost be a short story in its own right, and that may end up being a thing at some point I’m not sure. But either way, Miranda’s death was the catalyst for Steven hopping around the JTG train and plotting to punish the girls. Making his motivations for everything he did seem at least a little justified (especially looking at it all from his perspective) was very important. I mean, he couldn’t just be doing it because he thought it would be fun. Well, he could, that doesn’t make for a good villain. Heh… ‘good villian’ :P But yeah, that’s kind of been the thing all along. The girls are guilty. Sure, Steven’s done some horrible things that are absolutely not okay, but the girls are guilty. With Jackson’s infidelity, don’t take Steven’s word on the subject as the absolute truth. In the moment, he’s trying to hurt Snow as badly as he can however he can. He doesn’t think she’ll ever get the chance to compare notes with anyone so he’s not worried about getting caught. That said, Jackson was unfaithful to Snow more than once but there’s a lot more to it and how it was kept secret from Snow than has been revealed. Let’s just say Jackson has a lot of secrets and leave it at that for now :P Now, that said you’re right that it would definitely be just as big of a dick move if there were less girls involved in the whole thing, so it certainly wouldn’t hurt if there were less. So, don’t be surprised if there’s a few less names on Steven’s list when I do an editing pass here soon before I get around to posting ADG. I refuse to type out A Dangerous Game every time I have to refer to it. Sorry, it’s just not happening :P
But why does JTG have to stand for anything at all? I mean, A didn’t stand for anything so why should JTG? Yeah, okay, JTG absolutely stands for something xD We’ll get to that later, but it really does stand for something. Hahahaha, that’s fantastic! Some typos just work out perfectly. Snow’s voice is officially sexist now. How? I don’t know, but it’s a thing now xD And please, feel free to point out typos if you want. Heaven knows I could use the help catching them all. I swear, sometimes either my brain gets ahead of my fingers or vice-versa :P Whatever it is, I have to edit so much just to fix my horrible typing.
October 23, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Chapter: 59 Reply
Cooper’s back! Although, considering the grave circumstances of his appearance, I probably shouldn’t be happy :P Still, I wasn’t expecting him to show up again in this book and I didn’t think we’d find out what Fate did until the sequel, so I’m excited xD Anyway, it was interesting to see that I was right; Fate did make someone die before they could complete their tasks. Although, obviously Sara being the one who died is off the table now :P Still, if she’s not the person, then… Who is it? Surely it’s not a random Joe Bloggs from the other side of world :P Surely they have to have been in Mistbrook Falls. Although, I suppose because it seems so unlikely it would actually be the biggest twist ever if it was someone completely unrelated to the plotline :P Anyway, I’ll work under the assumption that this death was someone related to the main plot. Sara’s dad, Miranda, and Dennis are all people who’ve died from unnatural causes so I’m wondering if maybe it’s one of them who died when they weren’t meant to. Regardless of who it was though, things are certainly not looking good :/
I’m curious about what will happen now that Sophia has Miranda’s original autopsy report. I’m not quite sure what JTG is planning here, so I’m eager to see what happens. I’m especially curious how Tony will react when Sophia starts asking him questions. I’m just not sure what JTG’s motive is, though. I would have thought she (since we now know there is a second one and Steven is dead, I’m going back to the she pronoun :P) would want to dish out justice on Tony herself rather than have the police catch him, so maybe this is just to make him sweat? I really don’t have any idea :P Anyway, it was really interesting to see Tony and Co. together at last xD I wonder if there’s a reason why Michelle was targeted specifically by JTG, or if it was just a general text to make them all worried. And I guess I was right about them being involved in Sara’s presumed death :/ Even though I’d suspected it before, it made me really sad to find out it was true because that means Sara’s own stepfather (regardless of the fact she hated him) and likely her mother were involved in her attempted murder. Anyway, the ending of that section was certainly a big surprise. I can’t say I ever expected Alana to be involved with Tony and Co.. Although my heart sort of breaks to see her there, I’ll hold on to hope that she’s there for similar reasons to Randy and Julia (i.e. someone is being threatened), or… Well, let’s say I have a pretty crazy, far-fetched theory about why Alana is involved, but I don’t nearly have enough confidence or evidence to share it yet :P Regardless, I’m really curious to find out her involvement and see what happens now JTG has turned her attention to Michelle and the rest of the group in general.
Yay, Jackson survived :D I was really worried about him so I was happy to see he was okay. Well, okay physically, at least :/ I’m sure as Snow said, killing his best friend regardless of what Steven had been doing is going to hang over him for a long time. Speaking of Steven, I was surprised that he died so soon – but obviously, with the reveal that there is another JTG all the information that hasn’t been revealed yet will, I presume, be revealed through them at a later date :P After Steven died, I did start to suspect there would be another JTG, and I didn’t have to wait long to find out xD Still, before then, I hadn’t thought about JTG being a partnership (or team, who knows, maybe they’ll be another ten of them :P) for a while. It makes a lot of sense, though. Being JTG seems like a lot of work and being in two places at once, that’s way too much for one person to accomplish xD Anyway, despite of all the terrible things he’s done, I felt rather sad that Steven died :/ I don’t know why, exactly. I know he was far from a good person, but I still feel bad for him after all that happened. Plus, considering what I said in the last chapter about Steven being more manic (and emotional, too) than I expected, I suspect the second JTG is the more cold and calculating one. Maybe she was even manipulating him to some extent. But of course, that theory’s a long shot right now and regardless, Steven was still heavily involved in all the stalking and torturing. Still, I feel some sympathy for him :/ Anyway, overall this was a really good chapter. There were so many interesting revelations and all the plotlines were wrapped up well. I originally planned to finish off this story tonight, but I think I’m going to have to leave the epilogue until (hopefully) tomorrow or Tuesday since it’s already past 11 and I’m supposed to be at uni for a 7:30am lecture tomorrow >.< Clearly, the lecturers hate us :’(
October 22, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Heh, actually that scene with Cooper was supposed to appear back around chapter 49, but it kept getting pushed back because I wasn’t happy with the scene. Cooper comes off as a bit of an exposition machine, but I really felt I needed to get that into Snowfall and not carry it into ADG so here it is. I’m still not thrilled with the scene, but what’s done is done. Still, it was fun to bring Coop back for a bit regardless. It’s been a while since we’ve seen him and I wanted him to make another appearance in this, so he gets to guest star in the finale :P Hehe, once again one of your guesses proves correct. Seriously, you can be scarily accurate at times. If you have mind reading powers, please share your secrets :P But yes, Fate’s fiddling about with things resulted in the death of someone that shouldn’t have died yet, so she managed to officially break the universe. Thanks, Fate :P As for who died before they were supposed to… well, I’ll keep whether or not it was someone in Mistbrook Falls or not to myself for now. But you’re right that regardless of who it was, things aren’t looking good. In fact, they’re looking downright horrible.
Sophia is going to be a woman on a mission, that’s for sure. She’s got a lead and she’s going to be pursuing it as far as she can. She’ll be running into a particularly unpleasant bump in the road, but she’s looking to finally solve this mystery and she’s not going to let anyone stop her now. You know, that’s the interesting thing about the two JTGs. Steven was all about personally punishing the girls. Our current JTG doesn’t need to be so hands on. She’s (I’m going back to the original pronoun too :P) not as focused on doing the dirty work herself. She’s perfectly happy to let other people do it for her. I’d been planning to get Tony’s crew together for the longest time, but there was never a proper place to do it before now. The text from JTG gives them a good reason for a meeting. There’s definitely a reason for JTG sending the text to Michelle, but we’ll get to that later on. As for them being involved in Sara’s murder… well, I’m just going to let the chapter speak for itself. I’ll not say another word on the matter. Not a word, I say xD Ah, yes, Alana. So, fun fact, but Alana wasn’t originally going to be the one to walk in at the end. For the longest time it was the other Austin sister that was going to stroll in. Kayla coming in at the end would be a much bigger shock than Alana, but I was able to come up with a (hopefully) convincing reason for her being there. Kayla was a little more difficult and it just didn’t fit her character. Still, it would have been pretty fun. Anyway, I was sad to write Alana into that scene, but in a way it’s fun because Sophia is essentially going on the hunt for her own mother, she just doesn’t know it yet. Aww, but your theories are always so good! As many times as you’ve been right you could probably guess who JTG is right now and nail it xD
Yes, Jackson’s still with us for now. It’s funny but you’re not the only person who has told me that they thought he was the most likely to die when in actuality he was the only person other than Snow that I knew was going to survive. Well, at least for now :P Since I knew Jackson was going to be the one to kill Steven, I had to keep him around because there’s entirely too much emotional drama to just throw away. Jackson will be shaped by this event and I couldn’t just let that go to waste, so he gets to live. To be honest, the person that was in the most danger of dying here was, in fact, Mary. Way way back in my original plan for Snowfall, Mary had already died by the time we found out who JTG was. Luckily for her, things changed xD Still, once I started writing this chapter, Mary was the one I seriously considered killing off. It would have been a throwback to Halloween where Snow was willing to sacrifice herself to save Mary. This time, Mary would do something similar for Snow with more lethal consequences. As for Steven, it really would have been nice to keep him around for a while longer, but doing so presented a few problems. Mainly, he knows too much. If he’s still alive then he’s either going to jail and be interrogated by the police or he’d have to go on the run. JTG would never take him back (and in a sneak peek into the new JTG’s personality, she’d probably kill Steven herself since he’s been discovered and is now a liability) so it was easier to kill him off and save myself the trouble. And it would have been a lot of trouble. Heh, I’ve been envisioning that last JTG reveal for ages :P I kind of figured it wouldn’t be that much of a surprise, especially if you’ve seen Pretty Little Liars because I intentionally modeled the final scene after PLL’s first season finale. Honestly, I’m glad you feel sorry for Steven in the end. He wasn’t a good person, you’re right, but he hasn’t had the easiest life. He’s been forced to hide everything about himself from the people he should be able to confide in. So I’m glad you have some sympathy for him regardless. Anyway, thanks again so much for commenting :) Feel free to take as long as you need to get to the epilogue. It’s not going anywhere. But I hope your lecture was… I almost said ‘fun’ :P I hope it all went well, let’s say that instead. Ugh, that’s too early for learning. 7:30 is too early for most things :P
October 23, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall
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Oooh, well this epilogue definitely leaves us with an intriguing plotline going into the sequel xD I’m really curious about Carmel. Although I have been curious to meet Steven’s parents for a while after what’s been said abut them, I never really considered him having any other family. At least, not a sister who apparently was raised separately from him. Maybe they’re half siblings or something, that would make sense. Plus, it doesn’t sound like they look much alike (although admittedly it’s hard to tell at this point). Regardless, I’m curious to find out why she and Steven were kept apart, and what she’s been doing with her life instead of growing up with the gang in Mistbrook Falls.
The part with JTG was very interesting too. She seems very convinced that Carmel will join her, but I’m not so sure. I mean, from what little we see of Carmel, she seems to be a fairly reasonable person. I think she’ll come to town and find out that Jackson + the girls were involved in Steven’s death, and then she’ll be on JTG’s side initially. But when she finds out that Steven was, you know, torturing and planning to murder them and that’s why Jackson killed him, perhaps she will turn against her then. I mean, when Jackson claims he did it out of self-defence, it’s not like he’ll be lying, so… I don’t see her staying on JTG’s side forever. But who knows, perhaps she will remain ignorant to the very end :P
Anyway, although I know there’s a sequel to come, these last few chapters have been a really good way to end Snowfall. You really built up to the climax well and there were a lot of interesting secrets reveal – enough to feel satisfied, but at the same time, there’s still lots of old questions unanswered or new ones that have cropped up which will carry over to the sequel. Overall, I really enjoyed reading this story (and that’s an understatement). I think you really kept it intriguing right from beginning to end, and all the plot lines were interwoven well with a good mixture of drama, mystery, fantasy, romance, etc. The characters are all really interesting too, and well-written. There’s nobody I’m like ‘wtf is your purpose in life’ about (*cough* Littlefinger in season 7 :P). My favourite is probably Mary, so I’m very glad you didn’t end up killing her xD Anyway, you’re welcome :) I’m glad I could be of some help. And sorry for being much later than I said I would be to comment on this :/
P.S. Happy Halloween! :D
October 31, 2017 | Genevieve Middleton
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Ah, the epilogue. I wrote this ages ago, so long in fact that I wasn’t sure of any of the other details other than that Steven was almost certainly going to be dying in some fashion. It’s probably the only thing I’ve ever written in advance that didn’t get any changes other than some corrections and cleanup. Well, that and it didn’t start snowing originally but I decided I could be symbolic one last time :P Obviously I don’t want to say too much about Carmel just yet. We’ll learn more about her relatively early, but not immediately. There’s a handful of things I have to take care of and stuff I have to introduce in the first few chapters, so there’s a bit of a strict timeline for stuff. After that though we’ll be getting a bit more into Carmel and her family issues. We’ll meet her and Steven’s parents as well and find out where she’s been all this time and why she doesn’t live in Mistbrook Falls. Though I suppose a hint is fair, so here goes: her heterochromia may or may not be a natural phenomenon.
Heh, well JTG is never one lacking for confidence xD She’s certain Carmel will join her and I think it’s safe to say that’s an inevitability. Whether she’ll remain on JTG’s side or not, or whether she’ll join of her own accord or through coercion, is best left a mystery for now. One of the big things that I wanted to change for ADG is that I didn’t want to basically keep telling the exact same story. I wanted to make some changes, so there will be new POV characters and things like that (I also have to introduce a hopefully well developed fantasy world and I’m beyond terrified to do it :P) but the main thing was that I wanted a more transparent JTG. Not to say that you’ll be finding out who JTG is any time soon, you won’t, but up until now JTG has remained a complete mystery. With Carmel playing for the JTG team, we can get an insight into JTG that we haven’t had before. Basically, we get to see a little of what’s going on with the other side. Hopefully it’s as interesting in practice as I imagine. Probably not :P
Well thanks, I’m glad you think the build up to the ending was okay. This is the first time I’ve ended something like this. Warehouse ended, obviously, but it didn’t require some massive build up or anything so this was a very new experience for me. Completely off topic, but Claire’s sitting next to me laughing herself stupid over “You really built up to the climax well”. That’s her sense of humor for you xD You really can’t say anything that could even be remotely construed as sexual around her :P I have to admit that it was a difficult balancing act trying to reveal enough by the end so that the conclusion felt satisfying, but at the same time keep enough secrets/introduce enough new mysteries to maintain momentum into the sequel. But anyway, I’m glad you enjoyed reading this. I certainly enjoyed writing it, mainly because it was such a shift away from anything I’ve attempted in the past. Hahaha, well I’m glad there aren’t any characters that you ask that question about xD Can’t disagree about Littlefinger. He really didn’t have much purpose other than to be murdered in a rather brutal fashion. There are a few characters that I had absolutely no idea what to do with after I’d introduced them though :P Brad and Jacob are two of the biggest. Things changed so what I’d had planned for them wouldn’t work so I just sort of left them in the background for the most part :P Shhh, don’t tell the others but Mary’s my favorite too xD She’s not the richest or the prettiest of the group, but I’d say she’s absolutely the strongest of them all. I was surprised how much Mary came to mean to me over the course of the story. I tried not to get attached to her because I planned on killing her, but I suppose you can’t help who you love. But yeah, thanks again, truly. You’ve been a huge help to me through some of the crap that’s happened the last couple of years and I really appreciate it :) So with that I suppose I’ll say thanks, once again, for commenting on this :D And please don’t worry about being later than you said. I promise, that’s just fine :)
Happy Halloween to you too! Make sure you do something spooky tonight and eat entirely too much candy. If you’re me, you don’t need a holiday to give you a reason to eat too much candy :P Just don’t dress up like a werewolf and leap out at people getting off the elevator like my douche of a neighbor. He and I aren’t friends anymore :P
October 31, 2017 | Serina Truscott-Duvall