Status: In Progress
Summary:
Created: March 7, 2014 | Updated: March 8, 2014
Genre : Supernatural
Language : English
Reviews: 0 | Rating:
Favorites: 1
Reads: 751
Share this:
1: | Prologue | 466 |
2: | Summertime | 1132 |
Total Wordcount: | 1598 |
Reviews (0)
Comments / Critiques
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Chapter: 1 Reply
Hey, I know what it's like not to get feedback, but I think good or bad feedback is great. Your writing style is interesting, it feels very natural. I think in the first paragraph you may overuse a few words (I think unknowingly we all end up doing it sometimes).
Personally, I haven't written a first person story before, although I have read a ton. (This is basically a personal way of thinking here) I believe you may be going too much into the lead characters description which leaves little to the imagination - again, personal opinion - loads of people prefer it this way.
~MF~
March 7, 2014 | May Freighter
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Chapter: 2 Reply
Hey, loved the chapter. Just thought I'd point out two spelling mistakes I found:
1. seven too eight, 2. time argues about
Some commas were missing (I think i tend to put too many in so my beta's tend to remove them for me).
But the story itself keeps the reader interested. :D
~MF~
March 8, 2014 | May Freighter