PROLOGUE

Easy for a good girl to go bad, And once we've gone..There's belief we've gone forever.

You know, I believe in purpose. Everyone and everything has a purpose for being who and what they are. So, know what I figured? That there was a reason that I, Victoriez Honor Nicks, moved to the lame-o town of Boulder,Colorado. That I was destined to be the only girl in that town with enough personality to not hide what I feel. And hey, it doesn't matter if, when I lived in LA, as in Los Angeles, I was the "loner" girl in my whole entire school. It doesn't matter if I had the same group of friends my whole entire life, who I think were only still friends with me in high school because we had been friends in elementary school. It doesn't even matter that when I was in LA, I had long brown hair, not the short ice blond, it is now.

What matters is, I MOVED TO BOULDER, COLORADO. Are you aware that "boulder" is the word for a large rock? And man, let me just say, when I first got there, it seemed as if that's exactly where these people crawled from under. A large rock.

This whole story I'm telling you, didn't even start my first day of school. It started my second semester. I was in the eleventh grade, seventeen years old, when I decided to become Marshall High's bad girl...

[********]

"Let me just start off saying that my first semester at a new school, in a whole different state, and totally new town was eye-opening for me. I got to do a lot of contemplating and wondering about who I wanted to be in high school. I know what it was like in L.A. to be the girl that anyone hardly notices.", I took a deep breath, "And I'm not so sure that's how I want to be at this school, too. That's why I got this", I held up the bottle of Ice blond dye, "And these", I then held up the credit cards that were going to pay for all the new clothes I was going to get.

We had had two weeks off from school for Thanksgiving break. Only one week had passed so far. My best friend, aka my only friend at MHS, Leira Carson looked at me with a blank expression. She then furrowed her brows at me and looked at me sideways, "What're you gonna do?" She had said it slowly, dragging on her words.

I smiled and shrugged as I stuffed the credit cards in my wallet and put it in the back pocket of my navy blue jeans, "It's simple. I'm going to be Marshall High's official bad girl."

Leira was silent for a moment, and then all of a sudden, she burst out laughing. Once she was able to control a herself a little better she said, "Vic, are you serious? You don't have a bad bone in your body! And what, exactly, would you have to do to be the 'bad girl' of MHS?"

I shrugged as I threw my jacket on over my black v-neck t-shirt, "You know. Give people mean mug faces, and don't say excuse me when I bump people in the hall, and..act like I don't care."

"But you do. That's the whole thing.", Leira began putting her platinum blond shoulder-length locks into a ponytail.

I sighed and rolled my eyes at Leira, "Well I don't care enough to not become the bad chick. I mean, it was different in Los Angeles, y'know? There were plenty of bad girls there and they didn't need me to add something to that. But here, this town is a dud! You couldn't even find it on a freaking map! No fights have happened at school, and I haven't heard of anyone having beef, I've never even heard anyone say a curse word! You don't even curse Leira, and you have the most 'I-don't-give-a-fuck' attitude I've ever seen at that school. And no offense, but that's not saying much. And y'know, I may be the nice girl, but I'm also from L.A. I didn't need to bring the drama because the drama was always there. It's not here. And I think I can be the one to bring it. Shake things up a little bit."

Leira shrugged, "Well first, girls and boys act a certain way here because they weren't exposed to the kind of stuff you got exposed to in L.A. And the only reason I even have a little flavor to me is because my dad lives in Jersey. I don't really like it there that much. Boulder though, it likes to be peaceful. What's wrong with a peaceful town?"

I looked at Leira sideways, "There is such a thing as too peaceful." I jumped on the bed and almost landed on top of Leira. I put my arm around her middle, gave her puppy-dog eyes, and said, "So please? Are you gonna help me?"

Leira's teal green eyes narrowed and stared at me, "Are you gonna do this without me if I don't?"

I nodded, "Yep."

"Well then I'm in.", she sighed and smiled down at me, "I don't want to miss any of the fun." We shared a laugh and then we both left the house and went to the mall. We had some shopping to do. Top things on my shopping list? A badder attitude and tighter clothes.

[********]

So that's how it started. Leira and I had bought all different types of stuff that day. I also had her cut, style, and dye my hair. It turned out cute, reaching my shoulders and my bangs, full, over my forehead. And I had dyed it "ice blond". On the first day back to school, I looked the part. We had done a lot that one week we had left of break.

The first day when we had went shopping, I had just bought clothes. The second day though, when we were walking around this line of strip malls, often called "The Strip", we saw a tattoo & piercing shop. I had felt compulsive after seeing it. When Leira noticed me staring at the sign 'Pin's & Needles" she smirked at me and then pulled a card out of her pocket. When I looked at it, I saw that it was a fake I.D. that stated that Leira was twenty instead of her mere seventeen. And that, my people, was one of the reasons I loved my best friend.

We were laughing as we entered and I was damn near crying when I walked out. Turns out, Leira wanted to get something as well. She ended up getting a tattoo on the inside of her wrist. It was a big butterfly with intricate designs woven into it's wings, with the wings wrapping around to the sides of her wrist.

I, on the other hand, had to play bad-ass. I ended up getting a piercing that was above the right side of my lip. It was a "dot". But that's not all. I had also gotten a tattoo. Leira had talked me into getting it. She said it was so that I could look at it and not forget who I was. But, later, when I looked at it, I just thought it was embarrassing. And no, I never got it removed because, well, it was also a memory of this great adventure.

It's Mickey Mouse surrounded by a red and black star, his arms outstrectched as if to say "Welcome!". Know where I got it? In the bottom left corner of my tummy that was right above my pelvic bone. It hurt. Like. A. Bitch.

But by the time school came around I was cool. Collected. Hot. I know, I know, it sounds a little conceited. But I'm not even lying.

Leira had helped me pick out the outfits. For the first day, I had worn these black low rise leather skinny jeans. My shirt was also black and had, in neon yellow letters "My boyfriend's Wife Hates Me!", and showed a little belly when I lifted an arm or, really, moved at all. Which also showed just a hint of the points in the star of my tattoo. Over my shirt, I wore this black leather jacket with the sleeves rolled up. On my feet were these suede short boots with a small chain across the ankle. Over my head, I wore a black head band with a neon yellow, with black polka dots, bow.

If only you could have seen the faces of the students when Leira and I came strutting down the hallways. Not everybody had done so, but a few people had stopped what they were doing just to watch us walk down the hall. Leira looked equally cute in her jean mini skirt and light pink and white plaid shirt that flowed out at the waist and tied in the back. She wore hot pink ballerina slippers that had strings that wrapped up the ankles.

My heart felt as if it was going to explode in my chest, it was moving so fast. Somehow, though, I managed to keep my pace even and my hips swaying. I heard a few giggles, and resisted the urge to turn and see who it was. I could feel eyes glaring into my face and into my back. A part of me was saying "OH MY GOD, WOULD THESE PEOPLE STOP STARING AT ME LIKE THAT!?" and another part was saying "That's right, soak it up babes, you haven't seen nothin' yet!"

I managed to make it to my locker, without passing out, and even managed to get the lock off. I quickly glanced at Leira, who was casually looking up and down the halls.

"Well?". I sighed.

She turned to me, raised a brow, and smiled, "Working like gold, baby."

I smiled shakily, and my voice sounded relieved when I said, "Good. Great." I then proceeded to empty the black leather bag I had bought with me, which had been filled with my geometry book, literature book, and a few notebooks. I left only a notebook in the bag and a few pens, and then closed my locker. I turned back to Leira, feeling a little calmer, I sighed, and said, "Alright. Ready."

Just as we had begun walking in no particular direction, the bell had rang. We both had the same first period, Geometry, so we turned ourselves around and made it to our class. Miraculously, and totally not on purpose, we were the last two people to enter the classroom. So, of course, all eyes were on us.

Leira had been going to this school since the ninth grade, so a few people managed small smiles with her. But I was still the new girl. I hadn't got there until the beginning of eleventh grade, therefore, I just received stares. Incredulous stares, curious stares, glares. I initially ignored them all, and strutted to the desk next to Leira's, in the second to last row. The seats were side by side straight in the middle. There was one occupied chair on Leira's right side, and an empty seat to my left.

The first twenty minutes of class had been uneventful. A few people still glanced at me every now and then, but I thought the looks were easy enough to survive. Then that was when it happened.

His hair was black and looked silky smoothed down over his head. Instead, of this cute little curly mohawk, that was the color of silver. His eyes when he scanned the classroom, from what I could see, looked black. I watched his gaze linger on me half a second more than it did on everyone else. I wasn't fooled in the least, to think that he was interested in me. It was the hair, of course. His nose had a long arch, and was rounded slightly at the tip. His lips were bow shaped and a slight pink color. He wore black jeans and a button up black shirt, with a plain black leather jacket. I looked down to see the pair of all black Chucks on his feet. Who. The. Hell. Was this guy?

Mr. Hummers, the geometry teacher, finally looked up from the notes he was checking and noticed the boy standing in his doorway. Now, mind you, this all took about two minutes to happen. But it had felt like everything had been going in slow motion.

Mr. Hummers, who I actually might have liked if I didn't loathe geometry, looked to be in his late 30's. He was tall, and a little beefy. His hair was salt and pepper, and his eyes were a light, calm blue. He wore his standard stripped shirt underneath a blue sweater vest, black jeans, and hiking boots. His smile was easy and inviting when he asked, "Can I help you?", then, answering his own question, he snapped his fingers and said, "You're the new student aren't you? Come in, come in."

The guy answered, "Yeah, that's me. I'm Lennox Gray." He scanned the room with his eyes again, as if he were announcing it to everyone.

In reply, what sounded like the whole class, save for me, replied in teasing monotones, "Hi, Lennox." There were a few giggles and then everyone grew quiet, while Mr. Hummer spoke to this 'Lennox' character for a few minutes, signed his class sheet, and then pointed in my direction.

At first I was startled, thinking, why the hell would Mr. Hummer point at me when he was speaking to Lennox? Were they talking about me, really? But then, with embarrassment in my mind, I realized he had been pointing to the empty seat to the left of me, the seat by the window.

When he sat down, Mr. Hummer ordered one of the students to get a text book for the new student, and then turned back towards the board. I had been keeping my eyes straight ahead when I felt a little air near my ear, and then words were buzzing in my ear too, "My name's Lennox. But you can call me Lenny."

I turned in his direction, my heart fluttering with nervousness. But I knew none of it showed on my face. The smile I gave him was slightly flirty, slightly teasing, "My name's Victoriez. My friends call me Vicky. You can still call Victoriez."

His comeback was quick and made me raise my brow, "I'd rather call you Victoriez, anyways. It's a beautiful name." He then smiled his biggest smile at me, that somehow managed to be slimy at the same time.

And I didn't even have to think about the response I wanted to make, because words were already coming out of my mouth, "Y'know, why don't you not call me anything. I don't think I would be talking to you enough to get on a first name, nickname basis anyways."

I knew he was going to respond, but before he could, Mr. Hummer turned in our direction. You wouldn't think so by the way he kept carrying on, but I learned quickly, well, Leira and I both learned quickly, that just because Mr. Hummer wasn't looking at you, didn't mean he wasn't listening.

Lennox leaned back over to his desk and we both kept our eyes straight ahead...or at least, I did. From the corner of my eye, I could see Lennox smirk, before he turned back toward the front of the class.

[********]

"Hey, what do you guys know about that chick..Victoriez Nicks?", Lennox was sitting with the two new friends he had just made. They were twins.

Zoland, the oldest of the two by two hours, furrowed his brows as he chewed on a french fry, "You're talking about Vicky? Vicky Nicks?"

Slowly, Lenny nodded, "Yeah...I guess I am."

Zane, the other blond-headed twin, nodded, "She actually just transferred here this year. Eleventh grade.", Zane shrugged, and picked up a french fry, "Heard she came from Los Angeles. Other than that, don't really know anything about her."

Lennox bit on his bottom lip as he slouched in his chair, staring at the twins blankly. Zoland and Zane looked exactly alike, from the freckles covering their narrow noses, to the forest green eyes. The only way you could tell them apart was their hair. Zoland wore his in short spikes sticking here and there around his head. Zane, on the other hand, wore his shaved close to his head, which made him look like the older twin, eerily. "L.A., huh?", Lennox wasn't really speaking to them anymore, more to himself, as he watched her walk into the cafeteria. She was still very hot, Lennox thought, as his eyes slyly followed her to the line.

His eyes then briefly shifted to the slightly shorter girl standing next to her. She was cute, too. But he had his eyes on this "Vicky". He turned his eyes back to his friends, who were giving him knowing looks. Ignoring them, he said, "Have you guys talked to her yet?"

Zane shook his head and swallowed the food in his mouth before he began to speak, "No. I don't really remember her looking quite so...stand-outish before break."

Zoland nodded his head in agreement, "As a matter of fact, I distinctly remember her hair being a dark color. Black. Or brown, maybe. And her clothes mostly consist of t-shirt and jeans. I don't know what to tell you about her , now."

Lenny raised a brow, "T-shirt and jeans, huh?", he rubbed his chin and looked in the direction he had last seen her, but she wasn't there. With his mind racing, trying to put a word to what it was about her, he asked, "Didn't you guys take class pictures in the first semester?", at the twins nod, Lenny smiled, "That was all I needed to know."

Plans were already forming in his mind. He placed Vicky out of his mind, for a moment at least, to joke around and enjoy the rest of his lunch with his friends.

But Vicky who sat, nearly way on the other side of the room, stared at the back of his head, with an unsettling feeling in her stomach. She had watched him, slyly, watch her. She didn't know why, but it made her nervous. Victoriez put Lenny out of her mind, at least for the moment, to tune in to what her friend was trying to tell her.

2: Plans In Motion

Chapter 1

"Maybe you're just jaded from some nobody's unforgotten words; Maybe you're just faded, a little gray from every time that you've been hurt.. So you're lookin' for your skin that you never did fit in..You can't hide when you're turned inside out.."

"Morning, Sunshine." No, no, no, I thought in my head. I turned slowly to the sound of the familiar, slightly deep, voice of Lennox Gray.

You would have thought that after the first day he would have left me alone. You know, forget about me. Again, I had a feeling it was the hair but, more often than not, I found him seeking me out. Not to chat, or to ask me out, or anything so mundane, no. It was to bug the hell out of me.

He might have actually been likable, had he been doing this to anyone else. He didn't speak to me every time he saw me, but the times he kept walking he still gave me a "I-Know-What-You-Did During-Thanksgiving-Break" smile. And God, when he did stop to talk to me, it was to ask a bunch of questions. Like; Vicky, where'd you go to school before MHS? Vicky, where're you from? So Vicky, I checked out the school pictures that they have in the office, and I had almost missed your icy blond head until I looked you up by name and discovered a brunette. What's up with that?

What. The. Hell, right!? The first time he came up to me, I had almost been speechless. Luckily though, I've discovered a system. The "That's certified." and "You don't need to know." system. Oh, and my favorite "None of your business." Half my time during school hours were spent avoiding him. He had a way of making me feel uncomfortable and scrutinized. And I didn't like it.

But whatever, I thought, For the moment, I have bigger fish to fry. Like right now. He was in my face, right now.

With a blank face and dread in my voice I said, "Hi."

He smiled as he leaned against the locker that was next to mine, "So your from L.A., huh? That's so weird because I've met a handful of girls from L.A. and they were all so friendly. You, on the other hand..."

I rolled my eyes, as I slammed my locker, "They all probably had the IQ of a peanut as well. And so? What about Los Angeles?", and with total disdain in my voice, I added, "I live here now." My arm swept around to indicate the halls around me. And not with pleasure either.

Lennox fell into step beside me as I began walking, to no place in particular since class didn't start for another ten minutes, "Aw, it's not so bad. We're surrounded by, mostly, happy and friendly people." We seemed to have made our way by the outside benches, so I decided to take a seat.

I snorted, "And you call that 'not so bad'.", I glanced at him briefly, before I found a free table, and sat down, "You know, just once I would like to see someone get into a good fight around here!" I threw my arms up in exasperation. I then shook my head, knowing it was damn near impossible.

I looked up at Lennox, as he hadn't sat down. He raised a brow at me and crossed his arms, "Why? What's wrong with peace? What's wrong with everyone getting along?"

I rolled my eyes, "Are you daft? No one in this world, not even here, get's along with everyone. And there's no such thing as peace.", I then stood and began making my way back towards the open doors that lead to the hallway, knowing Lenny followed me, "And what the hell is your damage anyway? Why are you so interested in my life and what I think?"

I turned around to gauge his expression. He simply shrugged and said, "I don't know. Maybe it's like you said. This place is too boring."

I snorted, "Well I refuse to be your entertainment, so why don't you just bug off, okay?"

He was about to reply, but then the bell rang. Thank God, I thought, as I made my way down the hall, in the opposite direction of Lennox.

[********]

Where the hell was Leira? I sighed impatiently. It was lunch time and we were supposed to meet up by the lockers closest to the cafeteria doorway. I hadn't seen her all morning, and I was starting to think she hadn't come to school. It had already been eight minutes, and we only had thirty minutes for lunch. Finally, after five more minutes, I grew impatient (and I also had to use the restroom), and went to the girls' room.

There were a few chicks in there, and I managed to half-glare, and half-smile, at all of the them. I went into a stall, and immediately afterward, I heard the murmurs of whispers. I had to put my head against the stall door for a moment, my stomach was quivering so much. If I was going to do this, I needed to control my nerves, I thought, and shook myself. The good thing, though, was that I was very good at masking my emotions. No one suspected my inner turmoil. Luckily.

When I was finished, and I had heard all the girls exit out the door, I left the stall and stood in front of the sink. Amber eyes stared back at me. As I stared at my reflection, I thought that the haircut really worked for me. I then looked at the outfit I had worn today.

I had picked this one out today. I was wearing a form fitting black v-neck cable knit sweater, with the sleeves rolled up to my elbows. My navy blue skinny jeans clung to my hips, which were kind of on the narrow side, and I wore black flats covered lightly with glitter.

Suddenly, as I was wiping my hands with a paper towel, I heard a string of curses and then a sniffle. The voice was familiar, albeit scruffy, and it was coming from the last stall on the left. I walked towards it, and when I was in front of it, hesitantly, I said, "Leira?"

There was a gasp, and then a sigh, "Yeah, it's me."

I furrowed my brows, "What're you doing?"

Slowly, she opened the stall door...And revealed her curly mop of red hair. When I continued to just stare, Leira burst into tears. "It looks awful doesn't it!?", she cried. She sniffed and continued, "I don't know why I did it. I was just at the pharmacy, picking up my grandmother's meds, and I saw the beauty section. And then I saw the dye, and I don't know...I guess I was ready for a change as much as you were."

I began to shake my head, "No, no, Leira. I wasn't staring because it looks crazy or anything. I was just shocked." I put my arm around her shoulders and led her to the sink. I grabbed a couple paper towels and began wiping all trace of tears.

She sniffled, as the last of her tears disappeared, "You..you really think it looks okay?"

I took a step back and smiled at her, "It looks fantastic. Makes you look edgy." We both began to laugh. And know what the best part is? I wasn't even lying. Leira did look fantastic. When we had both stopped laughing, we headed to the exit.

Leira moaned and rubbed her belly, "I'm hungry. Let's go eat."

I checked my cellphone for the time and sighed, "We only have ten minutes left of lunch."

"And they probably only have the crappy stuff left."

I gave Leira a sideways glance, "Well, if someone hadn't decided to lock herself in the bathroom because of her beautiful hair, we would have our pick."

Leira rolled her eyes playfully, "What-ever." We both began to laugh.

We were a few feet away from the open double doors that led to the inside of the cafeteria when we were blocked by three things. Three things by the names of Dana, Jackie, and Marlow. They were cheerleaders, and broadcasting it by wearing their uniforms, which were the schools colors,navy blue, gray, and white. And they were glaring at Leira and me.

Oh, did I forget to mention the havoc I've been wrecking with Leira? I ignore teachers when they tell me to be quiet, I shove people that are in my way when I walk down the halls, I once challenged my geometry teacher because she graded a quiz I took wrong. Oh, and know what the best part about that was? I was right! I've made fun of the cheerleaders, and I've managed to land in detention maybe a total of ten times in two weeks. I've even heard that some refer to me as "The Ice Queen" for the lack of emotion I showed, I guess. Pssh, the nickname wasn't even original.

I laughed, as if I found their presence amusing, "What is this? Recruitment?"

Marlow, the leader, and of course, head cheerleader, with hands on her hips, turned her lips into a smirk and said, "No. Never. Actually, I just wanted to know what you think you're doing."

I crossed my arms under my chest, "Well, before you decided to play 'intimidating cheerleader', I was going to lunch.", I then checked m cellphone again, "But seeing how we only have about six minutes left - thanks by the way- I don't think we have time." I was pleasantly surprised that there was hardly any more of the turmoil in my stomach that would have been there, had this been, say, two weeks ago.

From the corner of my eye, I could see Leira, her eyes narrowed and one hand on her hip. She really did look fierce, I thought. Today she was wearing a black lace tank top decorated with red and white flowers with a intricate red necklace.. Navy blue jeans covered her hips and on her feet were short black boots with a one inch heel, and with her new fiery red hair, she looked the part of 'mean bitch'. I thought we looked tough.

Marlow narrowed her pale envy green eyes at me, and flipped her shoulder-length brown-with-blond-highlights hair over her shoulder, "Really? Oh, I'm sorry.", she then cut the sarcasm and went back to ranting, "I meant your attitude.".

It was amazing, really, that when she took a step forward, Dana and Jackie were like puppets, stringed to their leader, because they were right behind her. "You've been out of hand since day one and I don't appreciate it. Specifically your little stunt you and your doppelganger decided to pull at the football game the other day?"

I didn't hate them, really, I didn't. I just thought it was hilarious to make fun of them. She was referring to the times me and Leira would go to the games and get seats right in front of the cheerleaders. And all the while they were cheering, we would be making funny faces at them, or whooping a little louder than everyone else. And more mockingly. And then, once, Leira had been slowly lifting her top as if she were going to flash, causing a few of the male cheerleaders to lose their concentration and nearly drop Dana, Marlow, and Jackie on their faces.

Obviously they didn't appreciate it. I still held my ground as I tilted my head and with carelessness in my voice told them, "Look, I am sorry that you didn't appreciate our support that we had for the team and the cheerleaders. Truly. But you know what? Lunch is over in about three minutes. So, uh", I turned to Leira with a mock incredulous face and held my arms out as if I had just made a huge discovery, "I guess we can leave." I then linked my hands together with a clap.

Marlow looked a little more than mad. She looked borderline pissed. Gritting her teeth, she glared at me and said, "School isn't even over until three o'clock."

I smiled tightly at her and began wrapping my arm in Leira's, "Yeah, well. We won't be missed." Just as quickly as I had put in there, I stopped smiling and rolled my eyes. And in one swift turn of the heel, me and Leira were flouncing our way down the hallway. We weren't even yards away when we heard the buzz of their harsh voices, talking low.

We had just rounded the corner when we had burst out laughing. When it died down, Leira wiped the tears from her eyes and said, "Man, I dislike those girls. I remember once in middle school, they had took my school uniform while I was in P.E. and made me get in trouble because I wasn't in school uniform. And I had a little B.O. on the P.E. clothes. It was dreadful.", she then smiled at me and asked, "Are we really skipping the rest of school?"

I thought about it for a moment. Were we? I then shrugged, "The only things we have left are p.e. and we have to run today. Three miles. They don't need us..."

The decision was up to Leira. I didn't want to be responsible for her bad behavior. I only wanted to be responsible for mine. After a moment, when the lunch bell rang, Leira shook her head, looked around and quickly nodded, "Yeah, let's go."

Here is where we went wrong. See the thing was..we didn't know how to ditch. Did we just...walk out the front door? Did we go through the parking lot? Would someone stop us? What!? We were just...standing there. In the halls, looking back and forth. Then finally, disgusted with our lack of "ditching" knowledge, I grabbed Leira by the wrist and headed straight for the front door.

"Stop right there, young ladies.", the voice was stern, and sounded a little peeved. Leira and me both slowly turned to face the person who had spoke. She was the assistant principal of MHS. And she had just caught us about to ditch. Oh. Crap.

Leira and I found ourselves muttering, "Hi, Mrs. Vanwinkle." Funny name, I know. But it was so seriously hers. Or her husbands, which he gave to her. And why he married her, still remains a mystery. Vanwinkle, ten years prior to becoming the principle, had served in a military. Who, in their right mind, decided it was okay to have a militant as a principle? Oh. That's right. They weren't in their right mind. She looked every bit her militant self, in a standard black pantsuit, with the white button-up underneath.

Mrs. Vanwinkle came closer, to stand in front of us, arms behind her back, "Were you girls doing what I think you were doing?"

Leira and I were both too baffled and startled to do anything but shake our heads.

Mrs. Vanwinkle raised a brow, "Then what were you doing?"

"We -"

"On the way -"

"And -"

"Enough.", the command was sharp. Vanwinkle's eyebrows drew down and then she pointed in the opposite direction, towards the main office. "Move." Our heads held down, we walked ahead of Mrs. Vanwinkle in the direction of her office.

[********]

"Now, listen, ladies, I don't know what's going on. You realize, that, between the both of you, this is our third time in this office. And that's not to mention the amount of detentions. Something has got to change. And fast."

"Yes, Mrs. Vanwinkle.", we answered simultaneously.

And like Leira and I were silently praying she'd do, Mrs. Vanwinkle reached for two of the pink slips, also known as the detention slips. When she was done filling them out, before she handed them to us, she said, "I don't want to see you girls in here again. One more time and you will receive suspension. After that, academic probation. After that? Expulsion." She then held up the two pink slips, and when we grabbed them, we quickly shuffled out.

When we were a good twenty yards away, Leira jumped up and down, saying, "Shit! Shit, shit, shit! Vicky, do you realize what this means? They will notify my mother. Oh my God, Vicky what am I going to do, she'll kill me!" She then thumped her forehead with the heel of her hand.

I sighed, "Leira, I'm so sorry for this. It's all my fault. I should never have suggested that. We're just going to have to find out a way to express our badness on campus. And we have to keep it to a minimum. At least for a little while."

Leira nodded hurriedly, "I agree, I totally agree."

We were silent for a moment as we walked across the field to where our P.E. teacher was standing. I couldn't help it. I smiled, and that smile grew into a chuckle, "Do you realize how many times you said the word 'shit'?"

Leira and I stared at each other for a moment, my lips trembling, I was trying not to laugh, and hers slightly turned down. We then both burst into laughter.

Suddenly, a booming voice interrupted our laughter, "I hope that is not laughter for the two girls who show up to my class fifteen minutes late!" Coach Boors voice was deep, grating, and resembled a bear's roar.

Leira and I stood their, wide-eyed. I then raised a brow and stated simply, "We were in the assistant principal's office." We then both, simultaneously, held up our pink slips.

Coach Boors raised a thick brown brow over his dark shades, "Detention, huh? Alright! I want you two, since you feel like being so bad today, to give me four laps around the track. Go! And I want to see sweat on those foreheads, do you read me?" And annoyingly, he blew his whistle in our faces.

My upper lip curled in disgust as I watched him walk back towards the center of the field, "Y'know, that guy seriously wrecks my nerves."

Leira rolled her eyes, "Yeah.", she then shrugged, "Let's get on the track."

I sighed and did a full circle, staring at the track in bewilderment and began to whine, "But Leira, that has to be a full mile around that whole thing. And he wants us to do four!" I held up four fingers, as if she didn't get what I had just said.

She shrugged, and began putting her hair into a ponytail, "You do the crime, you do the time." She then began inching her short boots off, as we were standing by the side of the race track.

Then, that's when I realized another thing, "We didn't even get to change into our p.e. uniforms! And you're going to run barefoot?"

She shrugged again and said, "Well, I can't possibly run in these heels, I don't care how small they are. My feet would be biting, by the time I made it halfway around. And the track is pretty smooth, so I shouldn't run into any trouble." She then began to take off her socks.

I crossed my arms over my chest, as I followed her lead, and took off my flats, and with my foot, scooted them over to where our backpacks sat, "You're being awfully level-headed and calm about this."

She smiled and began stretching her legs, her bare foot hanging in the air, "I decided I've gotten in enough trouble for one day."

And as I turned my head, slightly, I somehow knew, I had caught Coach Boor's glare behind those Matrix shades he wore. I bit my lip and began stretching myself, "You know..I totally agree with you."

Neither Leira or I, were strangers to running. We took off at a leisurely pace. I nearly stumbled though, when, as I was looking around, I managed to turn my head just in time to see a familiar silver mohawk duck into a black Mercedes Benz, which I quickly recognized as Dana's mode of travel.

I rolled my eyes. So they manage to sneak out, all willy-nilly, and I was stuck here running four freaking miles? Well, that's awesome. Not.

And as I made my way around, for my second lap, I found myself imagining Lennox, nibbling on Dana's neck and rubbing on her leg, and seeing how she was trying to drive, he distracted her so much, she drove straight into a tree. Neither were seriously hurt except...the windshield had shattered and pieces of it had cut jagged scars into Dana's pretty little cheerleading face. Oh, and, Lennox had a sharp, long piece, sticking out of his thigh. No,no..a bunch of little ones. It would hurt more for them to have to pluck tiny pieces one by one.

When we were done, Leira and I plopped down next to our backpacks, sitting on the grass of the field. "Good run.", Leira panted.

I nodded, "Yeah.", as I looked in the direction the Mercedes had been sitting, I smiled and said, "The best I've ever had."

[********]

"Thanks for the ride, Dana.", it was said in an odd, sarcastic, but strangely polite, voice. A tone Dana knew Lennox had mastered, and was meant to say you really weren't thanked, but he felt it was something he had to say.

She rolled her eyes and then looked up and down the street as if she had expected the police to jump out and arrest her. "Whatever. Just don't tell anybody."

Lennox stared at Dana, his expression blank, except for a raised brow, "Yes, because I live to go around talking about how I got a ride home from a cheerleader." His voice was light, mocking.

Dana narrowed her eyes, "That's exactly what I was thinking.', she sighed and then looked over at him, wide-eyed, "Well are you gonna get out or not!?" She sighed impatiently.

He smiled sweetly, and falsely, at her, and then leaned over to kiss her on her cheek, "Check you later, kid."

Dana rolled her eyes and sighed once again as she waited for him to close her car door. Once he did, she was taking off down the street.

Lennox walked into his front door, shaking his head. And to the sound of someone screaming and crying. He walked into the living room and set his shoulder bag by the table that was against the wall. He then walked over to the couch and when he rounded it, he saw that it was his stepsister, Billy, lying there and crying.

He knelt to her level and spoke softly, "Hey Billy. What's wrong?"

She sniffled and her sea green eyes turned to look at him sadly, "Ma-Mindy says I ca-can't go play with my dolls until I finish my homework. An-And I told her that I didn't understand it and that I needed help and she said she was too busy. Sa-So then, I asked if I could go play with my dolls until she was done, and she said ta-to leave her alone 'cause she was busy and to na-not get off the couch." She then began to cry again. Billy was five, blond, and the daughter of Lennox's mom's new husband, Bruce. Lennox adored Billy. Bruce...well, they were still working on that one.

"Well you know what I say? I say it's time to go grab Barbie and give her a few shakes. What do you think?"

Suddenly, through the tears, her face brightened into a smile and she nodded, "Yeah, me too. But I don't call her Barbie. Her name is Mary." She then giggled before she took off running for the stairs and up to her room.

"What the hell are you doing home so early?", a southern drawl in a throaty voice came from behind Lennox. He turned, to see his mother, wearing an over-sized sky blue shirt and skinny jeans. Her wavy black hair fell to her waist and her shiny onyx eyes stared down at him in disdain.

He raised a brow and then stood up from where he had been kneeling by the couch, "I was let out early."

She narrowed her eyes and pointed a finger in his direction, "I know what time you're supposed to get out of school, tonto. Lenny, you better not ruin this for us. We have a good deal here and I don't want you screwing this up. We've had to move three times,and I don't want any more crap, usted oye?"

Lennox rolled his eyes, and sighed in frustrated annoyance, "Haven't we had this conversation before? Geesh.", before she could respond, he nodded in her direction and asked, "Where's Bruce?"

She crossed her arms under her chest and swiftly turned back in the direction she'd come, which had been the kitchen. As she did, she called out, "Esta en el trabajo." He was at work. Lennox snorted. Right.

His mother was from El Salvador, but came to America when she was two, to Houston, Texas. She had a unique southern/spanish accent, and he knew when it was her speaking, every time. Sometimes he wished he didn't hear it so much. He then smiled though, because he knew it was just all apart of how they worked. She would talk his ear off, he'd listen to half of it, and still do whatever he had been planning to in the first place.

Just when he was about to go upstairs, to where his and Billy's room were, he heard his mom call out to him, "Oh, and there's a letter over in the tray for you." She suddenly appeared in the doorway with a spatula in her hand. Her gaze flickered across his face as he changed directions, and went over to the table where the mail tray sat.

He picked up the tall orange folder and flipped it over. The address said it was from the San Quentin State Prison. The sender name read: Robert Gray. Lennox controlled the urge to snort in disgust, "It's from dad."

Mindy itched closer to lay a hand on her son's shoulder, "Are you going to open it?"

He turned to face her, and picking his book bag up off the floor, stuffed the envelope into it, "Nah. Not right now."

Mindy stroked a hand across his cheek and took a step back, knowing how he didn't like to be crowded, "Okay, mijo. Just know I'm here if you want to talk."

But before her last sentence was complete, he was already slamming out the door.

[********]

If there was one thing I hated about life, it was this: Often times, when you go through it, your going to go in circles a few times. Meaning, there were going to be plenty of times when you end up right back where you started. And believe me, I was one of those people who absolutely hated being in the same crap, I thought I had already put out of my mind. This pretty much summed up how I felt when Lennox had disappeared out of school for two days. Count the weekend, meant I hadn't seen him in four.

It wasn't because I cared or any bullcrap like that. It was because what might have happened to him, haunted me. Did my fantasy come true? Or was it worse? Was he dead? I mean, I wouldn't be told if he was, but wouldn't they have had like a pep rally or something? I would've felt really crappy if him and Dana really did run into a tree.

So see? This was about my state of mind, how I would feel if something bad had happened. Nothing to do with Lennox, period.

But, luckily, none of that was the case. He walked into MHS just as he had ditched it the other day. Healthy and with the "all-knowing" smiles, that really just made me want to kick him in the nuts. But the one thing that stopped me, was when he walked into class and i really got a look at him. He had sat directly behind me, as it had been the only seat left, seeing as he was the last person in the class. And, those smiles he used to pass me, were just a little off kilter today.

Whatever, I kept telling myself. Everybody has a bad day, and with the rep your trying to build, it wouldn't be a good idea to get all buddy-buddy with the guy and ask him about his problems. But then it seemed as if Fate decided to be a little sly today.

I had managed to keep my thoughts to myself when it came to Lennox...that was until we got to Bio. The teacher, Dr. Flog, was assigning a project. It was a group project. At first, he had let us pick our own groups, then quickly changed his mind. The number of people in groups were all out of whack, he had said. All Leira and I could do was look around, because the only people who had been in our group was us. So then he had started moving people around. And somehow, I had ended up with Lennox and his friend Zane. I looked around the classroom for Leira. She was with Jackie and Zoland. Dr. Flog, got damn him! Leira just stared across the room at me helplessly, and then her attention was pulled to Zoland, who I guessed, was trying to introduce himself, when he held out his hand.

I then turned a hard gaze on Lennox and this..Zane. By the way they were trying to keep their faces carefully blank, I felt like this was somewhat of a setup. I rolled my eyes and said quietly, but in an irritated tone, "Uh, hello? Are we going to stand around like we got glass stuck in our asses, or are we going to do some work?" I then smiled my fakest sweet smile I could muster. They were both quiet for a moment longer and then it was Zane who had started to speak.

Zane had smiled and held out his hand, "Right. Well, I'm Zane. I'm pretty sure you already met this sack of shit." He gestured to Lenny. Lenny just snorted and rolled his eyes. It made me remember the bags under his eyes and the off kilter smile he had worn earlier. Still...

I smiled a sincere small smile, "Sure. My name's Victoriez. You can call me Vicky." I was speaking solely to Zane, as it seemed Lennox wasn't in the talking mood. But he did raise a brow when he heard me tell Zane he could call me "Vicky". I had been less than accommodating when it came to him calling me that, as if we were friends. Still, when he raised his brow at me, it made we want to stick my tongue out at him.

I sighed to myself as I turned to my desk to pick up my biology book. I could do this. We only had to work on the project for two weeks, and then it was over. And then Dr. Flog opened his mouth.

He had finished fixing the groups and had now come to stand in front of his desk. He clapped once, and then began to speak in a booming voice, "Okay, students! Now that you have been placed in your groups, I just want to inform you that this project is what I call an outreach project. Meaning, that although the due date for most of the work is over in two weeks, you will continue to work in your groups as part of the follow-up research I'll have you do."

This caused a series of groans around the room, but I don't think anyone was louder than me. Well..maybe Leira.

With my tongue poking my cheek, I looked back and forth between my two partners. One I really didn't want to be around, and the other one of the friends of the person I didn't want to be around.

I rolled my eyes, as they both continued to stare back. One, with a raised brow and the other with faint amusement glinting in his eyes. I narrowed my eyes at the amusement and then rolled them and turned to the raised brow, "Again, we have a lot of work to do. So I suggest you guys get the molasses out of your ass, and let's get to work.", I then raised a brow, "And if you take a picture, it'll last longer." I smiled, as I snatched up my book and made my way to my seat.

[********]

Lennox smiled faintly as he watched her turn to sit down at the desk. Any other day, he probably would've taken this great opportunity to tease and taunt and smirk the day away. And there would be plenty of time for that, seeing as they were going to be working together for the rest of the year. Just not today. There were too many things on his mind.

He tuned in to the conversation, as Victoriez basically ignored him and spoke to Zane. He tilted his head as he watched her gaze flicker to him. She then looked down in her book and began speaking again, as she flipped through pages.

He really hadn't decided what he wanted to do with her yet, but he knew whatever it was, biology wasn't the only thing that was going to stand between them. He smiled at the thought and opened his book.

[********]

I arrived home with a headache. Maybe it was because my head was busy trying to figure out the emotion my heart should feel when it came to how I handled Lennox today. It came up with absolutely zilch. I didn't know how I felt about today, I just knew it was weird. And my instincts had been correct. Something had definitely been off about Lennox. He hardly talked and when he did it was to ask questions about something Zane or I had said. No smirks, no annoying inquiring questions, he had barely looked at me. And that was fine. Really.

But then I would go back and remember the times when I would look at him, when he didn't see me, and his face looked so lost and distracted, it could almost be called pitiful, if it weren't for the edge of anger I also saw. It made me curious to know just what was in that nosy little mind of his.

Then, all thoughts of Lennox were gone when I made my way to the kitchen and noticed the lone sticky note that stuck to the black surface of the refrigerator. It was from my mom. I snatched it off the fridge and began reading.

Sweety I've gone out of town for two days. No more than that, I promise. There's plenty food in the fridge. You can reach me on my cellphone. I love you. -Mom =)

I scoffed and rolled my eyes as I balled up the piece of paper. Out of town? I then crossed the room to where the kitchen phone sat on the island that stood in the middle of the kitchen and dialed my mom's cellphone.

It must have rang at least seven times before I heard the click of an answer. I furrowed my brows when I didn't here my mom's usual "Yellow?"

"Hello?", I said.

A few seconds later, came my mom's response, "Oh, hey sweetie. What's up?"

"What's up? You all of a sudden had to go out of town?"

"Uh...yeah. Did you read the whole note? I'll be back in two days."

"Two days? Where're you going?"

"Ummm...", I then heard rustling, like paper, and then my mom's response came, "I'm going to San Quentin."

I raised a brow and sat silent for a moment. A fierce frown developed itself on my face and I took a deep breath, fighting to remain calm, "Mom. The only thing in San Quentin is dad. Tell me that's not what you're going for?"

All I heard was silence. My voice quivered, as I fought not to shout, "So you're telling me, you left me here by myself to go to visit that asshole in prison? That's what you're telling me?"

My mom began to plead, "Sweetie, please, try and understand. We're all your dad has left - "

"You know what, I don't care mom!", my control had finally slipped and I was shouting, "Do whatever the hell you want. And when he ask about me like he really cares, tell him I said fuck off."

I heard my mom gasp, "Vicky -" Click. I had hung up.

Bullshit! I slammed the phone back into the receiver. Anger ran wild through my blood, and before I could think anything else, I was grabbing my jacket and bag back off the floor and heading out.

After all, I was free to do whatever the hell I wanted. Mom, was out of town.

3: Drunk Man Tells No Tales

Chapter 2

"I'm a bad girl, I'm gonna do what I do..I can have my cake and eat it too..A girl like me will bring you to your knees..."

Night was barely touching the sky. It was getting close to six o'clock. Usually, I'd make sure to be home before this time because mom didn't really like the thought of me in a new town after dark. I remembered though, that none of that mattered. My mom wasn't here, but miles away. There wasn't anybody to nag me about driving too late, or to tell me to follow a curfew. I was absolutely alone.

I also remembered that I was in an unfamiliar new town. I didn't have any idea where any place was. I had no idea where I was going, when I climbed into my '67 VW Beetle sedan, with the new shiny coat of red paint. My mom had got it put on for me, along with a new set of tires, just before we moved to Boulder. I guess it was her way of saying "Please cooperate, and get along. Everything will be okay."

Well, she lied, I thought, as I sped down the quiet street, my engine, disturbing the quiet. Everything wasn't okay, and I was dissatisfied with the way things were right now. The only person I really had was Leira. But Leira wasn't here at the moment either. She had told me earlier at school that her dad was coming to town, and her and her little brother had to have dinner with him. For some reason, that just me made me sad, thinking about it.

But I hardened my heart, and focused my mind on driving. So there I was, driving in no particular direction, when I saw it. It was a bar, with a neon sign that flashed "Gus's Bar" and had a martini glass with an olive in the glass by the "r" in "bar", and a cactus by the "G" in "Gus". As I passed, I made a spontaneous decision to do a U-turn, and I pulled up in front of the bar.

I hopped out of my car and walked to the entrance. Their was no security guard standing next to the door, but when I walked inside, I spotted them in all four corners of the bar. Smoothing my hair unconsciously, I walked over to one of the tables rather than the open bar. I sat there for maybe about five minutes, people watching. a waitress with long brown hair, dressed in thea tight black v-neck shirt and black miniskirt, came over to take my order.

I could see the pink gum she chewed on, and she smiled and said, "Hi, my name's Jessalyn. Welcome to Gus's, what can I get you?" She eyed me, curiously, as I was obviously not one of the regulars. She had a nice little country accent, and her voice was open and friendly.

I stumbled to find something to ask for, "Oh uh..what do you recommend?"

She smiled, gum in cheek, and then chuckled, "A glass of water, maybe? Or some apple juice?", she then leaned in closer and asked, "What are you doing in here, little girl?"

I smiled tightly at her, "Forgetting about my big girl problems."

She shook her head and leaned even closer, "You know, I know you might not be too happy with this, but drinking while you have a bun in the oven, is never too good."

My brows furrowed as I thought about what she said for a moment. My eyes then widened and then I gave an incredulous chuckle, "No, no, no. I am not pregnant! I just want to forget about some stuff for a while."

She straightened, and I felt like the smile she gave me this time was genuine, when she said, "Well, we all wanna do that. And sorry to say, it's not my job to tell you alcohol isn't the answer...so how about a whiskey??"

I nodded my head, "Sure.", as she walked away, I winced and then called out to her, "Not too strong, huh?" I wasn't too sure how well I could hold my liquor, seeing as, I never drank any.

She nodded and smiled, turned around, and then flounced away. It surprised me that she hadn't asked me for my I.D., but I had guessed I looked more pitiful than I thought.

It was about an hour later, I had thrown down about three and a half glasses of whiskey. I was just about to finish off the fourth, when I turned my head. And directly in my line of vision was no one, other than Lennox Gray himself.

I watched, losing all interest in my glass of whiskey, as he was patted roughly on the shoulder by one of the security guards. Lennox shrugged off the guys hand and turned around. He was saying something, but I couldn't hear as far away as I was, and because of the amount of people in the bar.

I grew curious when I watched the security guard snatch up Lennox and begin dragging him to the exit. Lennox tried to resist, but the guy was much to big for him.

I grew curious, which had me following them out the door. When we reached the outside, I watched the man release Lennox. I sobered myself as much as could, or acted like I could, and approached the guard and Lennox.

"Um, excuse me, sir?" I said in a loud, polite voice.

"What?" he shouted and then swiveled his bald head in my direction. He leered me up and down, but his voice didn't soften when he asked, "What do you want?"

I pointed at Lennox, "That's..He's…my brother. Is there a reason you're practically dragging him out of that bar?"

The security guy furrowed his brow and frowned at Lennox, "Uh, yeah. How about he's under 21?We hadn't found out until he was on his ninth shot of vodka, straight. "

I raised a brow, not sure I heard correctly, "Vodka? Shots? Nine?"

Clearly annoyed, the security guard says, "Look, lady, are you asking questions just to be nosy or are you going to be responsible for lugging this dead weight home?"

I put my hands is the pocket of my jeans, "Uuuh…sure. I'll take him home."

The security guard nodded, his expression still scowling, "He can come pick up his car in the morning."

For the first time since I arrived, I heard Lennox speak, in a slurred voice, "See that's where you are wr-wrong Mister Buff. I did-didn't even driiive here, sir. I…walked." He pointed his finger in the guy's chest. Very stupid, I know, but he was drunk.

I watched the security dude turn red, and that's when I grabbed Lennox by the arm and began to pull him towards my car, "Um, come on Lenny. Time to go now."

As I sat Lennox in my car, I heard the guy mumble something about "stupid teenage drunks" or maybe it was "punks" I don't know, before he walked back into the bar.

I rounded my car, to get to the driver's side door. When I climbed in, I looked over at Lenny, who had adjusted my seat to lay back a little bit more, rested his head back against my seat, his left arm covering his eyes, his right propped against my windowsill. And as I pulled away from the curb, I smiled slightly and began to speak, "A bar, huh? What'd you do, have a fight with Dana? Now you feel like drinking yourself into oblivion? Go figure." I snorted and then chuckled. I then stopped abruptly when I realized I was a little bit tipsy myself.

I barely heard Lennox's muffled response, "Could you just drive, please?"

I altered between staring at him and the open road, "To where, exactly?"

He finally moved his arm from over his eyes to look sideways, at me, "Well I live on Fullerton St. How about there?"

I nodded, and pretended to think, "Well see there's only one problem. I don't know where you live."

"But I just –"

"I heard what street you just told me, but I have no idea where it is. That's what happens when you're a girl in a new town." I snorted and rolled my eyes, clearly irritated, with his alcohol-induced slowness.

Lennox dropped his head into his hands and took a deep breath, "Right. You don't know. And my head's whirling too much for me to give you directions."

"And", I pointed out, "Obviously you can't drive yourself there. So what are you going to do?", I smiled, as if I suddenly came up with the best idea ever, "I could just let you walk from here. I saved you from Hulk Hogan back there, so I think you'll be good."

Lennox suddenly groaned and began leaning against the door. I looked over, frowning, "What's wr –"

"Pull over."

"But we're –"

"Now!"

I made my way to the side of the road, and was for once, grateful for the empty roads, instead of crept out. I was even more grateful, when Lennox shoved the car door open, got out, and with his hands on his knees, emptied the contents of his stomach onto the sidewalk.

About a house down from where we stopped, I could hear a dog barking, probably because of the loud choking and gagging sounds Lennox was making. Soon, I saw a light go on in the upstairs window. I didn't want to, but I leaned forward and grabbed Lennox's shoulders, steering him towards my car.

"Come on, Budd, before we have company.", I sighed with irritation as I finally managed to get him into the car. When the door was closed, I circled around to the driver's side, and then , without thinking, I drove.

Frustrated, I thumped the steering wheel with the palm of my hand, "Ugh, I cannot do this right now! Why'd you have to go and get yourself drunk? What was so bad, that you decided tonight, you wanted to get hammered!", I didn't give him time to answer, as I had gone on to ramble, "And then on top of that, that bitch they call Fate decides to plop you right into my car, and now look where we are."

And I hadn't known until I looked up, that I had meant it literally. Where we were, was in the driveway of my house.

Lennox looked over at me with squinted eyes, and groaned, "Where are we, exactly?"

I sighed and got out. Damn it all to hell. I responded after I made my way to the passenger side and opened the door, "My house. Get the hell out."

Lennox stared at me for a moment, like the words were still traveling through his ears. I stared back, my head tilted, hand on hip, and foot tapping impatiently. Finally, he slowly climbed from the car. As soon as he was out, I locked and closed the door. I then turned around and grabbed his arm, pulling him to the front door.

"Listen", he began, "I'm not seriously foxed. I've had way more than nine shots of rum and coke before and –"

I rolled my eyes, and said impatiently,"Idiot, it wasn't rum and coke , it was vodka. Straight."

Lennox stood there as I held the door open for him to enter, "Oh." He then tripped over the doorway as he walked into the foyer.

Shaking my head in disgust, I took off my jacket and threw it on the couch. I then turned to Lennox, who was leaning against the doorway, surveying his surroundings. My mother always left the blinds open in the living room during the day, and closed them at night. Because my mother wasn't there, the blinds were still open, and the moonlight spilled onto Lennox's face, making him seem dream-like and mysterious.

I'm a little tipsy too, I thought, as I turned towards the kitchen. When I got there, I surveyed my options. When I heard Lennox's loud entrance, I turned my head, "What do you want?", I looked to the fridge again, "Water or juice?"

Lennox, leaning his head against the doorway, blinked slowly at me and said, "I just want to lay down."

I stared at him for a moment as I contemplated his request. The only thing I needed to figure out was where he was going to sleep. I didn't have to worry about my mom, of course, because I doubted she would be back tomorrow. It was just whether I wanted him here."

Deciding to play nice, I nodded and closed the refrigerator door. Tongue in cheek, as I walked passed him and towards the stairs, I called, "Follow me."

Since my house wasn't two story, we only had to walk down the hall to get to my room, which was the last door on the right. Don't worry, we weren't going to be in the same room. I was going to sleep in my mom's room.

When I opened the door and signaled for him to enter,he immediately walked inside. I was about to reach for the light switch, but Lennox's voice stopped me, "No. Don't. It's alright. I just want to go to sleep."

I nodded, "Alright, do you see the bed?" As soon as we moved into the house, I knew immediately this was going to be my room. I fell in love with it. The ceiling was the coolest part, to me. It was round, like a dome, and on one side it had a window, which I would need a latter to actually see out of, but it let in a nice amount of light, from the sun and the moon. I had placed my bed directly in the center of the room, so that I could stare straight up at the center of the dome. Also, the light falls directly on my bed most hours of the day . I didn't have a closet, but my dressers and shoes were spread in three corners of the room. The fourth corner was occupied by my computer desk and school books.

He nodded and chuckled lightly, "How could I not? It's in the center of the room."

I shrugged, "Just making sure. You are drunk, after all." I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms under my chest, as I watched him stumble across the room.

After a few minutes, and a few trips later, I sighed impatiently, and walked over to him, "This is ridiculous." I grabbed him by the shoulders, ignoring his protesting grunts, and guided him toward the bed.

When Lenny's knees brushed against the bed's edge, at the same time I was going to turn him around to lay on his back, he began falling on the bed. This caused both of us to land on the bed, with me on top of him. Because the bed had bounced us slightly when we landed, Lennox had took a hold of my waist with both hands to steady us.

I leaned up on my elbows to stare down at him. It was weird. The moonlight spilled on his face, so that I saw his features clearly. Our faces were only inches away from each others. When I had leaned up on my elbows, my body had arched, so now our middles were also pressing close. I actually shivered.

Shivered.

We lay like that for a moment, until Lennox's whisper entered my thoughts, "Are you going to climb off of me or stay here? Either one is fine, but I kind of prefer this." To emphasize his statement, he widened his legs so now we fit snugly together.

I took a deep breath. He's drunk, he doesn't know what he's doing. Or saying. He annoys you, daily. And even if he didn't, you don't even like him. You never did. Besides, you can smell the alcohol on his breath.

So why, why, didn't I pull away when he grabbed a hold of my hair with his left hand, and pulled me down to his lips? And what made me kiss him back?

All I have to say is...I was tipsy.

I didn't think about anything but his taste when he rolled over, so that he was on top of me. His tongue was doing crazy things to my mouth, and all I could do was loop my arms around his neck. His mouth then left mine to go along my jaw, then down to my neck. He bit and licked, and sucked on the area between my neck and my shoulder and I knew he had left a mark. He lifted himself up into a kneeling position and took off his shirt. He then reached for mine and pulled it over my head.

Moments later, my bra was unsnapped, his jeans were on the floor, along with both of our underwear. Lenny produced a foil packet from his wallet, that had been in the back pocket of his jeans. I took in and released a deep breath as I watched him as he ripped it open, and rolled it down his...manhood.

When he was finished, he positioned himself over me and between my legs. "Are you sure about this?", he whispered.

My hands traced a pattern down his chest, ass my legs rubbed against his, "Kind of late to be asking now, huh?", I whispered back. I didn't really understand any of what was happening, all I knew was that there was a heat between my legs, that I really needed Lennox to handle.

With heavy lidded eyes, I watched Lennox watching me, as he eased himself inside of me. It hurt and it burned. I squirmed a little and winced, when he was in all the way.

Lennox, who had rested his forehead on the pillow next to my head, leaned back, his brows furrowed, "Are you a virgin?", he whispered.

Wanting him to stop talking, and start moving, I said, "Sssh. Move with me, baby." I then began to squeeze him on the inside.

I felt the shudder go through his body and his head bent forward as he released a deep breath. "I'm gonna go slow, okay?", he whispered. I just nodded, and then he began to move.

The first couple of thrust were the hardest, but when the third one came, it jolted something inside of me. Lennox wasn't small, I don't even think he was average size, and I felt every hard inch of him. Soon, my hips began moving with his, which caused him to go even deeper.

The only three sounds you heard were our breathing, the creaking of the bed frame, and the moan or grunt every now and then, from the both of us. My fingers were clutching at Lenny's back

After a while, I felt him arch into me, at the same time my mind and I think my body exploded into bright colors. I had just had what they call the "Big O" and it was with Lennox Gray.

Talk about a bitch named Fate.

4: The Morning After

Chapter 3

"You make my teeth clinch, And my hands shake, Do you ever see..what you do to me? You're wearing me out.. Just wearing me out..but I'm wearing you down... You're impossible, but lovely.. So impossible, to win or please..."

I woke up, my head swimming, my eyes clenched together, almost my whole body sore. I recognized the fabric of the sheets and covers underneath my fingertips, as mine. And as I sat up, rubbing my head, I wondered what the hell I had did to make my head feel so heavy. Then I remembered my trip to the bar. I squinted over at the clock that sat on my nightstand.

But before I could completely turn my head, I was staring down at a male body, with a sheet tangled around the waist, leaving his torso exposed. His head was angled in the opposite direction, but I still recognized the silver mohawk. It was Lennox Gray.

Suddenly, everything that had happened in the past twelve hours came back to me. From the time my mom left, to the bar, and then to when I took Lennox Gray to my home, into my bed. And we had sex. My first time. Shit.

Slowly, so as not to disturb him in his slumber, I eased out of the comfort of my bed. I glanced over at the clock on my nightstand. It was 6:30. School started in an hour. I could make it.

As I tiptoed around the room, searching for necessities, I stared at Lennox's sleeping form, searching for any sign that he might be waking up. When I was sure I had everything I needed, I began to back away towards the door, still staring over at the bed. At Lennox's muscled, barely covered, hard, sleeping...form. I shook my head, and quickly headed out of the room.

I hopped in and out of the shower, glad that I was less sore...down there, and that my walk resembled normal.

Once I was dressed, I didn't waste any time. Well, aside from taking a quick look in the mirror. I was relieved that what I had picked up, at least matched...a little. I was wearing a pair of light blue jeans, a royal blue long sleeve thermal, and my black and white converse. My hair was short, so it wasn't hard to manage, so I left it as is. I sped walk through the house and swiped up my bag off the floor of the foyer. When I was outside, I ran to my car, and pulled out of the driveway.

[********]

I made it to school with five minutes to spare. But that still did not leave me enough time to make a trip to my locker. Of course, my first period, which Lennox was in, there was no sign of Lennox. I grew nervous as the clock ticked on, and found it hard to concentrate. Millions of thoughts ran through my mind.

Like, was Lennox coming to school? Would he confront me, if and/or when he got here? And then there was the whole matter of what we did. I know I said I could do whatever I wanted because my mom wasn't there, but I never meant sleeping with, of all people, Lennox. I sighed as I rested my chin on the palm of my hand, staring at the board, as Dr. Flog talked on. I was happy that he hadn't ask us to get in our groups, after, for what seemed like the hundredth time, I caught the eye of Zane. I turned away, and began to look at Dr. Flog again.

It was going to be one long day. I could feel it.

[********]

I paced quickly to my locker, not paying attention to anybody, as I dug through my bag. Not their stares and glances, which were kind of the norm. Not the way the crowd shifted, and a few people began walking in my direction. Not until I raised my eyes, when I was less than ten feet away from my locker.

I slowed my pace, not believing my eyes. I was immediately grateful that I had needed to take all of my school books home, the day before. Because if I hadn't, like my locker, they would probably be trashed.

It was completely wrecked, covered from top to bottom in red and black spray paint, and a million dents. As I stood directly in front of my locker, I managed to make out a couple of things like "Go home." and "Suck". Oh, and "You".

I also saw that my lock was broken, which made me almost afraid to look into my locker. But I knew what had to be done. I reached for my locker knob, and slowly creaked it open. It was covered in white stuff, top to bottom. I touched it and sniffed it, and discovered it to be glue. I looked between all three sections my locker was divided into, and discovered that I had left a couple of notebooks in one of the sections. They were completely covered and drenched in glue. It was then, at the very top section, the smallest one that I discovered the note. It had read:

We don't play the game. We watch it. Want to keep going?

I felt a surprising tide of anger begin to consume me, anger I once never thought I would have been capable of. I knew immediately exactly who had done it. Marlow and her gang of leeches.

I found myself slamming the locker door, and turning around. Of course, everyone within twenty feet, was looking in my direction, "Where is she?", I exclaimed fiercely, which was really close to a shout.

Suddenly, everyone was busy, no one was looking at me. I was fuming, and was just about to go searching for them myself, when a geeky-looking kid stepped up and in a lowered voice said, "They're sitting at the outside lunch tables."

I nodded, and then I was on my way. I found them quick enough, seeing as they weren't trying to hide. At the table there was Marlow, Dana, Jackie, a couple of other cheerleaders, and three boys I recognized as football players. I marched towards the table, and when I was less than five feet away, Marlow began to watch me.

I squeezed between two of the players to place my hands, palms down, flat on the table. I took a moment to glare at one of the football players, Omar, I think his name was, as he cursed and glared at me.

I rolled my eyes, snorted, and then turned to glare at Marlow, "What the hell is your problem, cheerleader?"

Marlow smiled at me, a smile that made me think of violence, and said in a mock innocent voice, "Why, hello Vicky. Today is a beautiful day and there's a game after school so", she raised a brow and tilted her head, as she folded her hands on the table top, "I don't believe I really have a problem.", she then rested her chin in the palm of her hand, "But you seem a little upset. What's happened?"

I narrowed my eyes, "You can cut the crap, okay? I know it was you.", in a high, mocking tone, I repeated the words on the note, "'We don't play the game, we just watch it.' Blah, blah,blah.", I then returned to my normal voice, "That was kind of clever actually, did it take all of you dimwits to come up with that, or did you Google it, or something?"

Marlow's smile turned frosty, "Okay, look, I'm sorry that someone took it upon themselves to tarnish your locker. You must have ticked someone off real bad."

I leaned forward, "I never said someone tarnished my locker."

Marlow snorted and rolled her eyes, "Oh, come on. Anyone who went within ten feet of your locker, knows what happened."

I know I was supposed to be playing cool, but the nonchalant way she was handling all of this made me feel...not so good. It was a feeling that I was the only one making a big deal out of things, and no one else seemed to mind... Like I was the only person in the horror film who knew that the popular kids were actually blood sucking aliens, trying to take over the world. And the feeling inside of me was coming too close to that time in a L.A. when...

Marlow's voice interrupted my thoughts, as I heard her say, "Obviously, you've got serious problems that need to be dealt with, and I know that we're your superiors, but we're not the ones you go to for things like this.", her voice then turned mockingly sympathetic, as she furrowed her brows and said, "I am really sorry about what happened to you though." She then stood up and said, "Ladies, it's time to go." I looked her up and down as I watched her stand, my jaw clenched, knowing I had no choice but to let her walk away. Which was when I noticed the black smudge that the princess must not have noticed on the edge of her skirt.

Before I knew what I was thinking, my fist were balling up and I was circling around the table. By the time I got to Marlow's side, Marlow and the clones faced me with their arms crossed over their chest, "Not as sorry as you're going to be!" After that, it was like things happened in slow motion.

I was raising my fist to take a swing, and suddenly arms like chains, locked around my waist, and was pulling me back. Since it was at the same time as I was about to swing, I felt my knuckles just barely graze Marlow's jaw. I couldn't see any of them anymore, as I was being practically carried away, but I could hear Marlow's indignant cries and the murmurs of "Are you okay?"

When the person who had been carrying me, made it into the hall, I squirmed, trying to get him to let me go, "I'm fine, alright! You can let me go!" He was walking swiftly, and I wondered where the hell this guy thought he was taking me.

"Stop resisting authority!", the voice sounded stern, and grown up, which comforted me. Slightly. But I was still annoyed that the guy had to carry me like some little kid.

I sighed and let the person continue to drag me, thinking it might be one of the coaches or something, taking me to the office. But when we stopped in front of a door, that's when I saw where we were really going. The boys locker room. Also known as, Hook-up Central!

A while ago, a lot of bullying and fights used to happen in the boys lockers room. One of the students had actually ended up killing himself. Which caused the rule that the boys locker room shall not be open for use during school hours. Boys sports teams practiced after school, and the P.E. classes changed in the bathrooms. Which, when you thought about it didn't really help anything, because that just meant the bullying happened in the bathrooms again. This left the boys locker room open all day. Vacant.

The locker room had swinging doors, so it was always open. A few times, the coaches would come in every now and then for equipment or playbooks, but that was in the office part of the locker room. Where the lockers, and the benches, and the showers were, is where the "hooking up" went on.

I began to struggle. But the guy didn't let me go, until we were in one of the shower panels. I was close to the shower head. He was blocking the exit. I turned around, ready to give the guy a piece of my mind and then --

"Calm down Vicky! It's me.", Lennox's voice relayed amusement. I almost wanted to fall into a puddle and flood down the drain. He wore a form fitting black t-shirt and dark colored jeans. He was staring at me, a half smile tilting his lips.

"Why'd you have to drag me here!?", I cried.

He shrugged, "It's a nice - and not public- place for you to cool down."

I glared at him for a moment, and then sighed as I closed my eyes. "I see.", I opened my eyes, "Thanks.", I mumbled. I leaned against the yellow, tiled, shower wall.

I watched him cross his arms over his chest, as he leaned his left shoulder on the side of the stall, "You were really about to do a number on Marlow out there."

I felt my jaw clench as I explained, "She trashed my locker."

He nodded, "I didn't get a chance to see it. But hey.", he switched topics so quickly, it amazed me, "What happened this morning?"

My throat suddenly went dry. I cleared it and said in a peeved tone, "What do you mean, what happened? I got up and went to school."

His lips tilted into a half smile again, "You know what I mean. You could have woken me up.", he shrugged, "Gave me a ride."

I raised a brow and crossed my arms over my chest, "First, I'm not your mother. I didn't have to wake you up. Two, I figured you'd wanna stay in, you know, with a hangover and all." I rolled my eyes, and then concentrated on the tile underneath my feet.

He whistled, long and low, "Someone's a little.. prickly. Huh, it's funny because last night you were practically begging me to give - "

"Oh, screw you.", I had my eyes narrowed.

Suddenly he was directly in front of me, and I could feel his breath tickling my cheeks, "Already did that. But again? Sure." And before I knew what was happening, he was picking me up, and holding me against the wall, my legs on either side of his hips, which he began rotating, as he kissed me full on the mouth.

I felt myself shiver, and caught my breath to stop the moan that had wanted to escape past my lips. I began pushing on his chest as I felt his hands move to the button and zipper on my jeans. "No.", I panted.

He chuckled, as he breathed on my neck, "What's one more time?" He then licked and bit down gently, in the area between my neck and my shoulder. I gasped, and squeezed his shoulders.

Somehow, even with him distracting me, I managed to push on his chest harder, "I said no."

He stilled, and after a moment, released me and nodded his head, "I'm sorry. I got carried away."

"No shit. You came really close to having a mouth full of fist.", I slid down to sit on the floor.

He gave me an amused snort and smiled, as he mimicked me, by taking a seat on the floor, "Really? I didn't see it going there.", he then paused and gave me a predatory smile that made goose bumps rise on my arms, "Don't pretend you don't want me."

I stared at him incredulously for a minute before I spoke, "First, I don't want you. Second, doesn't matter where you saw it going.", I shrugged, "That's what I was thinking."

He narrowed his eyes, "Who are you lying to, I wonder, me or yourself? And if you didn't want me, you wouldn't have given me your virginity last night."

I didn't mean to do it. But every nerve in my body screamed shock and a little embarrassment. That was when I found myself saying, "But that's just it. You weren't the one I gave my virginity to."

I watched Lennox snort with dry laughter, "Oh please. You left me alone in your bed. I saw...I saw the blood. On the sheets."

My eyes widened momentarily, but then I reigned my emotions in, and said in a blank voice, "It's been a while."

I watched Lennox watch me, a frown on his face, his brows furrowed. Then, in a confused tone he said, "What? No..It doesn't appear after the first... I mean, you..."

I smiled and shrugged, "Yeah, well...", I then watched him for a moment, before I raised a brow, "Thought you had it figured out, huh?", I snorted and rolled my eyes, "You don't even have a clue." I crossed my arms under my chest, avoiding his gaze. I could feel his gaze on my face, so finally, I looked over at him.

We then just sat there, staring at each other, until he broke the silence by asking, abruptly, "Why are you so mean?"

I furrowed my brows, as I began to stand, "I'm not mean. I just have a spine."

He thought about it for a moment, before he raised a brow and said, "Compared to who?"

I was relieved when he let me walk past him, out of the small space of the shower stall. And just before I was getting ready to walk away from him, I turned to him and said softly, "Compared to no one. It's just me."

[********]

Lennox listened to her footsteps, and then the sound of the squeaky swinging door, as she left him, sitting on the shower floor. He was kind of ashamed to say, he didn't really remember all the details about last night, but he remembered, very clearly, the sex he had with Victoriez. It had been... He sighed. His spine quivered just thinking about it.

And he knew for a fact she had been a virgin. He just wondered why she was lying about it. Standing up, he contemplated it as he began making his way to the door.

Just as he walked through, the bell rang, signaling the next class. He had been getting ready to go look for his friends, Zane and Zoland, but decided to wait until after school to tell them about his little escapade with Victoriez Nicks.

[********]

"Dude, no way!", Zane's face showed shock and surprise.

"Uh, yeah.", Lennox leaned back in his chair, as he watched his two friends react to him telling them about Victoriez.

"You didn't man.", Zoland's was almost an exact replica of Zane's, except he was shaking his head incredulously.

Lennox sighed as he mopped a hand across his face, "But I did."

For a moment they were all silent, and then Zoland sat back in his chair with a thump, "How the hell did you pull that one off?"

Lennox shrugged as he played with his straw. They were at The Strip, in the food court, munching down after wandering around in the clothes, music, and video game stores. "Well, we both had been drinking a little."

Zoland smiled, "A drunk mind is a sober heart." Lennox smiled and rolled his eyes across the table as he grabbed up a handful of fries.

Zane took a sip of his soda, and then asked, "So wait. Does this mean you two are together now?"

Lennox took a bite of his burger. Still chewing he shook his head, and then when he swallowed, said, "No. I don't think so.", he paused to take a sip of his soda, "But I'm not giving up on her, not yet."

Zoland raised a brow, "So what are you gonna do then?" There was silence for several minutes.

Then, Lennox smiled, showing all his teeth, and said, "We are going to throw a party."

"A party?", the twins said simutaneously.

Lennox nodded, "Yep, a party."

Zane and Zoland looked over at each other, smiled, and then nodded, "A party!" They slapped hands.

[********]

"So how was the dinner thing?", I asked Leira. It was after school and we had decided to chill at her house.

Leira shrugged as she plopped down next to me with a package of Oreo cookies in her hand, "It was tense and awkward at first. Ben wasn't talking much. He hadn't seen dad in almost five months.. I guess he wasn't too happy."

I nodded, "Well, you know it can't be easy for your dad either. I mean, it's not his fault that your mom decided to move here."

Leira nodded, "Well, I understand that, but Ben is only nine." The mood was sober, as we sat there munching on our cookies.

I nodded and swallowed, and then turning the atmosphere back to light, I looked at Leira with an exaggerated pout, "Leira, I was so lost without you!" I then jumped on her laughing, squeezing her in a bear hug.

"Get.. off!", she laughed, and when she managed to push me off, she sat up, tears in her eyes, laughing, "Speaking of which, what did you do, anyway? While I was gone?"

I pinned Leira with a stare, "Sorry to tell you, but my whole world doesn't revolve around you, Leira.", I smiled at her raised brow. I bit into another cookie, as I suddenly became interested in the sheets underneath me, "Nothing. I just went... into town."

Leira raised a brow at me, "In town? For what?"

I laughed, "I don't know, what do people go to town for? Shopping.. people watching...a stop at the local bar." I rolled my eyes, until; they settled on Leira.

She was looking at me with bewilderment clear in her eyes, "The local bar? Which one?"

I couldn't bring myself to look into her eyes, as I said, "Gus's."

Leira raised a now, copper colored, brow at me, "You went to Gus's Bar and did what?"

I shrugged and rolled my eyes, "I was bored. And it was easy to get inside. I had a few shots, and then I went home, no biggy."

Leira looked at me sideways, "Shots? How did you manage that when your barely seventeen?"

I smiled, "Oh, I had a really cool waitress." My smile turned fond as I thought about Jessalyn. She had been nice and I wondered where she live if/where she went to school. All of this flashed through my head in three seconds, and then I was listening to Leira, who was talking about so-and-so, sleeping with whoever's best friend.

I half listened, nodding my head, and widening my eyes in all the right places. I even asked questions, egging Leira on. But all the while, I was thinking about what I didn't tell Leira.

I wasn't sure why, but I just wasn't ready for Leira to know what really happened when I was left alone.

[********]

"Did you hear?"

"Oh my God, yes!"

"Hear what?"

"Lennox Gray is having a party!!"

"Really, where?"

"Get this: It's at her house."

I watched from the corner of my eye as all three girls turned their heads in my direction. I snorted as I closed my locker, and rolled my eyes in their direction. I smirked over at them, one hip leaning against the locker, "Just because you scurry into your little hurdle, doesn't mean I can't still hear you. You might wanna try whispering." I then turned and walked away. I could hear the harsh buzz of their voices, yards away.

I put them out of my mind, as I had bigger things to worry about. Like I had a party that was going on to at my house. And I hadn't been invited.

As I sharply turned a corner down the hall, my target came into my line of vision. He was standing in front of what I believed to be Zoland's locker, with Zane and Zoland smiling in front of him.

Because of Zane and Zoland, blocking his vision, Lennox didn't see me until I had come directly in front of, in between Zoland and Zane. I narrowed my eyes at him, my hands on my hips, "So, when were you going to invite me to the party at my house? Oh wait... when were you going to ask to use my house?"

Lennox stood there, eyes wide, obviously in shock, "Who told you?"

I rolled my eyes and took a step forward until we were almost nose to nose, "Who told me? It's my damn house! Who the hell do you think you are?"

Lennox smiled, a Cheshire cat smile, and said, "It's simple. I'm the boy who made you come all over - "

Before I knew it, he was hitting my open palm with his face, "Screw yo...Fuck...Go to hell!" I then stormed down the hall, feeling the heat creeping into my cheeks. As I walked further away, I heard a few burst of laughter and then lingering sounds of people going "Ooooooooh."

It was all quite hilarious, actually. Except, it would have been better if it weren't happening to me.

5: Paaarty/Aunt Susan & Birdie

Chapter 4

"Baby don't go and lose it again...You would always run, Out of the sun and into the rain."

No one would come, they wouldn't. They had better not.. they couldn't. I made it very clear, the same day it had been declared, that there was no party at my house. It had been two days since my mom was gone, which meant she could be returning at any moment. Not that I cared.

When I got home, I immediately took a shower. P.E. had been kind of tough today. I think Coach Boor had it out for me. And as I dryed myself off, and began rubbing my skin with lotion, I reflected on how things were going so far.

I had done it. I was Marshall High's "bad chick". Or at least, one of the most bad chicks there. With Leira's help, we were the most talked about, the most looked at, the most feared... the most admired.

How did I know I was admired, you might ask? How did I know that there were a few girls who wished they could be me, or at least, have the courage to do the things that I did, especially, in such a small town? Where news and reputations far proceeded any and everyone, young and/or old? How did I know that most of the whispers in the halls were about me and what I do?

Because I had been there. i knew what it was like to watch someone walk down the hall, so close, yet so way ahead of you, it was mind boggling. It was like that in L.A. In L.A. I was -

The chimes of my doorbell gave me pause.

I quickly slipped on a form fitting hot pink v-neck and a pair of black skinny jeans, and my striped gray and black socks. The bell chimed again. My palms grew clammy.

I knew my face looked set in stone as I walked to the door and peeked out through the peephole. It was Leira.

I swung the door open immediately, and pulled Leira into a hug, "Hey! I wasn't expecting you, dude.", I smiled lopsidedly, curious and surprised, "What's up?" I pulled away to look into Leira's face, seeing her uncomfortable expression.

"Well, um, actually -"

"Paaaaaaaaaaarrrrtaaaayyyy!!!" Oh no. I stared, my eyes widened, stunned, as I watched Zoland, Lennox, and Zane, push past Leira and me, and into my house. I quickly stepped in front of them, my arms and body blocking their way.

My expression immediately turned thunderous, and my voice was raised when I said, "I thought I told you there was no party here! What the hell?"

As if I weighed no more than a feather, Lennox picked me up, and grunted out, "Go on guys. Kitchen's through there." He pointed in the direction of my kitchen. Zane and Zoland hesitated brirfly, before moving to the direction of Lennox's finger. Once, Zane and Zoland had disappeared, Lennox set me down, and followed them into the kitchen. I stared over at Leira incredulously, as she still stood in my doorway, hands in her back pockets, silent.

"Did you know about this?"

Leira shrugged, "Well, they told me they just wanted to say hi, and Zane's really not the type of guy to - "

"Right. Thanks for the help Leira. Can't believe you fell for it!", I turned on my heel, rolling my eyes. I followed them, as I had no choice, seeing as I was 5'6, one hundred and twenty pounds to their, 6'1, two hundred pounds. Before I was fully in the kitchen I muttered, "Traitor." Just loud enough for Leira to hear it. I could hear the shuffle of her feet and she dragged them across the floor, and into the kitchen.

I walked into my kitchen to find Lennox and Zane filling bowls with all kinds of assorted junk foods and candy. Zoland was stuffing the fridge with sodas and punches. Leira walked over, smiled up at him, and started to help. Among the sodas, and wine coolers, I saw a pack of beers.

I crossed my arms under my chest, "So that's it, huh? You guys just barge into my house? I could call the cops."

Lennox smiled at me, "But you won't. Because you're having a party. Everyone knows so"

I raised my brow, "It's my house. You are trespassing."

Lennox shrugged, "No we're not. We were invited."

I threw my hands in the air in exasperation, "No, you weren't!" I rubbed my temple as I glared at Lennox.

Lennox nodded his head chuckling, and stopped the task he was performing to stare incredulously at me. Which made everyone else freeze. I just stiffened and placed my hands on my hips. With his head tilted he asked, "Why are you so against having some fun? You have the house, to yourself. And it's a big house. With a backyard. And a basketball court, that's begging to be used as a dance floor. Your whole house, is begging to be used for a party! So I just wanna know why are you acting like you got a broom stuck up your ass?"

The room was silent. The tension was thick. I could feel my pulse hammering in my throat, and I could feel my fist ball up. In a voice that was cool and controlled I narrowed my eyes and said, "Hanging with people I don't know is not what I call fun. Opening my house to people I don't call friends or family, is not my idea of a good time. And if I've got a broom up my ass, it's because you, " I pointed a finger in his direction, "Put it there!", I then took a deep breath, pausing to gather my temper, "Go on, then. Have your party. Break anything? You will pay for it - with money or not, it's optional - one way or another. If you need me, I'll be in my room."

I threw one final glare, saying, "Oh, and you will leave no later than two o'clock. Or I will call the cops." I gave everyone a dirty look, including Leira (the traitor), before I walked out of the kitchen.

When I got to my room, the sound of the door slamming reverberated through the house.

[********]

I was irritated. Whether because there was a party going on, in my house, and I wasn't there to enjoy it, or if it was the fact that there was any party at all, I couldn't tell you.

I could hear the music, thumping from downstairs. Where did they get a stereo? None of the radios in my house would have played loud enough to vibrate the whole house.

I could hear the muffled sounds of people's laughter through my locked door, and the yells and hoots from outside. Sounds like everyone was having a good time. What-ever.

I was just fine, laying my bed, my arms behind my head, staring up at the ceiling. I rolled over.

I didn't care. Let them have their fun. I didn't need, nor did I like not a single person down there. Not even Leira, at the moment. I was content to stay in my room until it was time for everyone to leave. Which, I glanced at the clock, was a long time from now. It was only eight o'clock. The party had been going on for three hours with no sign of dwindling down.

I closed my eyes, praying for sleep to take me under. But no luck, I was wide awake. That's when I heard the knock on my door. I sat up quickly, and nearly ran to the door. But just before I twisted the knob, I straightened my back and took a deep breath.

Not really surprisingly, it was Leira. "What do you want." , my voice was emotionless, and my face was blank.

Leira cleared her throat, "I want you to come out."

There were people all along the hallways, and I could see some of them practically staring at me, or trying to, past Leira. I snorted in disgust, and pulled Leira into my room. I slammed the door. I turned to Leira, "Why should I? I never wanted this in the first place. And I can't believe you would - "

"Would you stop whining!? So what, yeah, I knew that Lennox and the twins wanted to get into your house to throw the party. But who started this whole thing in the beginning. We did, and if you didn't want to take on the trials that go along with being the 'bad girl', then I don't know why you came up with the plan in the first place!" Leira threw her hands up in exasperation.

I just stood there, staring at her. I wasn't really sure how I felt about the fact that Leira just.. went off on me. And she seemed genuinely irritated with me like.. I was somehow, in the wrong.

Because nothing had been said in a while, Leira softened her voice and inched closer to me, "All I'm saying is, people want to know what you are like without having to actually talk to you, "she paused briefly and smiled, "They're too scared for that.", her voice softened even more, "Come outside. See all the people who adore and hate you."

My shoulders dropped as I stared at the floor. Leira was right. Besides, had I not just been thinking almost those exact words before she had even got here? I nodded, and gave Leira a small smile, "You're right, I'm coming.", I rolled my eyes, as I walked across the room to grab up my shoes, "Let's go out and see all the losers at my party."

Leira giggled and jumped up slightly, "That's more like it... are you wearing that?"

I looked down and then back up at Leira incredulously, "Uh, yes. What's wrong with this?"

She surveyed me up and down for a moment before shrugging and saying, "I guess your right. You're fine. Just let me pick out some earrings for you and you'll be fine." She then smiled as she walked over to my dresser, where my jewelry box sat. It had jewelry everywhere except for inside the box.

As I slipped my feet into my black and white converse, and tied the laces, I could hear Leira mumble about how disorganized I was, "You find anything?"

She turned and walked over to me, where I was sitting on the end of my bed. Leira nodded, and then handed me two heart diamond stud earrings, "Uh huh. Put these on." As I put the earrings into my ears, Leira went about adjusting my hair so that it wasn't hiding my lobes, and my bangs were swept to the right side, instead of center like usual.

Next thing I knew, Leira was brushing mascara onto my lashes and dabbing a tiny bit of lip gloss on my lips. Ten minutes later, we were walking out of my room.

As Leira and me walked down the hallway, I could feel everyone's eyes burning into me. Drinks paused mid air, food stopped being chewed, and sentences ran off. After all, Victoriez Nicks had just made her first appearance all night.

[********]

I didn't talk to anybody. I gazed at any and everyone that was in my immediate vision, but I never uttered a word. For me, it was like I was at the museum. And I was the exhibit. There to be looked at but never touched.

I walked into the kitchen, nodding my head slightly, to the beat thumping through the house. I walked up to the island and grabbed a hand full of chips out of the bowl. Walking through the house, munching on the barbecue flavored Lays, I made my way to the backyard.

They had set up big speakers and a DJ stand underneath the hoop of the basketball court. The court was slightly full with jumping and gyrating bodies.

And then, as if by some weird force, as soon as I was on the edge of the basketball court, a slow song began to play. A really, really slow song. Some of the people cleared off the floor to take a break or go get a snack. There were still a number of couples, though, that remained on the dance floor, bodies pressed close together. Really, really close.

I stood their, swaying, watching the festivities, from the dancing couples, to the laughing and joking friends that stood on the sidelines. I had lost Leira somewhere in the house, but it was fine. I was busy observing my surroundings, and looking at all the faces that came. To a party that was hosted at the "Ice Queen's" house. I snorted at the irony of it. At school, they made sure to steer clear of me and some barely made eye contact. But they were all willing to party at that same person's house.

I stood there, swaying to the beat, when a pair of hands, grasping my hips, made me jump. By the tingle that went down my spine, I didn't even have to turn around to know it was Lennox.

"Dance with me.", he murmur into my ear.

I turned my head to the side and up to stare at him, as he held my hips, and raised a brow. Right then, I decided to just relax. After all, it was my house. No one would make me feel uncomfortable in my own home. "Sure", I smiled crookedly, "I guess it wouldn't kill me."

He turned me around, and slowly, backed me more towards the center of the basketball court. The song that was playing now was called "All I Want is You" by Miguel and J. Cole. It was a nice, mid tempo song, and very easy to slow dance to.

When we were in the mix of other people on the dance floor, Lennox let go of my hips to take hold of my hands. When he pulled me close, his chest brushed against mines, with every sway to the music.

We made eye contact, and I watched as Lennox's lips spread into a slow smile, "This is nice." His voice was low.

I rolled my eyes, "It's just a dance. One dance."

Lennox raised a brow, but was quiet for a moment, then raised his brow at the exact same time his smile turned wicked, "Actually, if you'll recall, a couple of nights ago, we had our first dance. Except that one, was horizontal."

Fury filled me like someone had just flipped a switch, making me shove hard against his chest, about to walk away with my lips curled in disgust. But before I could Lennox grasped my arms, and pulled me back to him saying, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. That was uncalled for."

I narrowed my eyes at him, but stayed where I was, "Why do you do that? Why do you constantly keep throwing that one night in my face?"

We were just staring at eachother, me glaring, him with a blank face. He then blinked and said, "Because", he leaned in close to my face, only a breath away, "I want to make sure that you neverforget."

I rolled my eyes, and pulled away from him, gently this time, to ensure that he would let me go, "Like I could ever." And quickly spinning on my heel, I walked off the dance floor, just as the last of the song played out.

"All I want is you now.. All I want is you now..All I want is you now..."

[********]

"Do you know that it is passed one o'clock and no one is gone.", I was sitting on the couch, talking to....someone.

So yeah, I was drunk. Now, there is an upside and a downside to this. I'll start with the upside.

The upside is that I wasn't and have never been an obvious drunk. I don't slur. Or at least not very audibly. The most I do is babble. Which is not necessarily a good thing, but hey it beats falling down or flashing someone.

The downside was.. well, hey, I was drunk. And I was a talkative drunk.

I don't know when I picked up that first drink. I don't even recall when I picked up the one in my hand. My throat felt like it had been heated in a freaking microwave, dry and burning, as it was. My mind was only slightly hazed, as I've said, I'm not an obvious drunk.

Getting tired of just sitting down, I stood slowly, making sure not to juggle the heaviness in my head. I made my way down the hall and into my room.

Of course, when I get there, there is a couple making out on my bed. "Get out.", I croaked. And again, of course, the boy was just fine with not stopping, but the girl, I could tell was already pushing the boy off of her, her cheeks bright red.

As she passed me in the doorway she mumbled, "Sorry.", and then was gone to join the festivities. The boy, wasn't as apologetic, saying, "Thanks a lot.", as he stormed out, brows drown down. I recognized him as Omar Kelso. A football player.

I smiled at him and then saluted, saying, "My pleasure." He was out and walking down the hall.

I sighed as I was left alone, closing my door. I tripped over to my bed, and plopped down on top of the blankets. That's when I realized I still had the red cup of alcohol in my hand. I swiped a hand across my face and then scooted up on the bed to set the cup on the little dresser next to my bed. I then laid back with my left arm over my eyes.

I was in that state that was half sleep and half awake. I knew it had been a long time that I had been laying there, maybe twenty minutes, and I had not got close to falling fully asleep.

Just when I was about to give up, and grab a book or something, I heard my door creak open. Without removing my arm from over my eyes, I said, "Room's taken!"

"Um, why are you in here sleeping when there's a party out here?"

I sat up and sighed, looking over at Lennox. The light from outside was against his back, which means I couldn't really see his face. "Because I've had all the party I can and am going to take.", I then rolled my eyes, even though he couldn't see me, "And why do you always pop up, wherever I am?"

He shrugged, "Coincidence.", then closed the door. A flag went up in my mind.]

I tilted my head at him, "Yeah, right. It's just a coincidence that you popped into my room." I sat up on the bed.

I watched as Lennox itched closer to the bed. The moonlight from the window flashed across his face, his lips tilted in a half smile, "Relax, will you? I'm not gonna turn into a vampire and suck yout blood or something."

I snorted out a laugh, "Aha. Right." Another flag went up in my head when he came to sit beside me on the bed.

"Scoot over will you, you're directly in the middle and taking up all the space.", when I didn't move, he threatened, "You know, I could just move you bodily."

I sighed heavily, "Fine. Big baby." I then scooted over to the right side of the bed. Lennox came to sit next to me. Both our backs were against the pillows and headboard. His black-socked feet were crossed at the ankles, mines touching big toes.

We sat there for a moment, and I thought that maybe he had just planned for us to sit in silence. I should've known that that was too good to be true.

"Something's up with you."

I had come to close my eyes, but immediately, my lids flew open, "I'm sure I don't know what you mean..."

He shook his head, and I watched him studying the blanket underneath his fingertips, "Something happened. I don't know what it is, if it was L.A. or here... but something's made you change so... drastically."

I was quiet for a moment, and then I raised a brow, "Wow. You sound as if you've been thinking about this a lot."

He looked up from the blanket, and connected eyes with me, "Actually, I have.", he then did an unexpected, gentle move, running a finger along my cheek and down my jaw, "I've been spending quite a while trying to figure it out."

I raised a scornful brow and sucked in my cheeks, replying, "How's that working out for you?"

He sighed, as his finger continued it's path down my neck, where my pulse beat like crazy, and then to my chest - where it stopped, "Not too good. You have this wall built around you made out of four ton bricks. But I believe it'll happen one day."

My smile was just as scornful and haughty as my raised brow had been, "You think I'm that easy?", I rose from the bed, "Lennox Gray you have a lot to learn. And I don't know if it was that 'one night' or whatever, but do you think that gives you the right to dig into me and my thoughts? Well think again, Lennox!" I rolled my eyes, as I searched around my room in the dark for a sweater. Preferably black.

Suddenly, Lennox was off of the bed, stopping me in my search, by grabbing my wrist, "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down. Why do you get so mad all of the time?"

"Why do you push me all of the time?" We stood there, his hands still wrapped around my wrists, glaring at each other - as best we could anyways - in the dark.

Suddenly, Lennox's lips were on mine so fast, I didn't have time to react. Well, negatively anyways. Before I knew it, I was kissing him back, holding on to the back of his mohawk.

He had begun backing me into the bed, when the door swung open again. I would have laughed if I hadn't seen that the person who walked in was Leira. Because just like the couple who I had walked in on before, I was pulling away from Lennox when he was still trying to hold on.

"Sorry!", Leira quickly muttered, then came to stand directly in front of me, "Um, sorry to interrupt", she glanced meaningfully at Lennox, "But we have company. Adult company."

My heart filled with dread, and my stomach filled with a thousand butterflies, "Wh-Who is it?"

I watched Leira swallow hard before she said, "Says she a friend of your mom's. And she wants to see you. Immediately."

My throat constricted. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. I then quickly squared my shoulders as my insides quivered. The only thing I could do was greet this... company, as Leira had put it.

I made my way to the living room, each leg heavy like I had bricks attached to them. Leira and Lennox right behind me. I managed to keep a blank face all the time I was walking. I looked around and had guessed the everyone got the hint that the party was over. Very few people remained.

I walked into the living room, my hands balled up, like they usually do, when I'm nervous. The woman had her back turned to me, so that all I saw was big curly red hair that floated to a thick waist. Something about that hair seemed very familiar...

Lennox cleared his throat and then Susan turned around, her green eyes taking in Lennox, Leira, and me, standing before her. The twins, I noticed were standing by the window, silent.

"Well", her voice was husky, with the slight use of cigarettes, I guessed, "You certainly haven't had a hard time of adjusting have you, Birdie?"

My eyes widened. Of course! How could I have not recognized her. She was the only one who had ever called me that obscene nickname "Birdie". "Aunt Susan", I exclaimed. Even to my own ears, my voice held the least welcoming. I crossed my arms and glared at the floor, refusing to look at her.

Completely oblivious to the infliction in my voice, she set both hands on her hips, and raised a slick red brow at me, "Don't you 'Aunt Susan' me, Birdie. Just what in the big green apple made you think that throwing a party when your momma's not here, was okay?"

My smile was tight, and I knew my eyes had darkened when I said, "Nice to see you too , Aunt Susan. And with all due respect, I dont' think I owe you any explanations."

Aunt Susan narrowed her eyes at me, "We'll see about that."

6: Some Things Never Change.. And Some Things Always Do

Chapter Five

"A spider web is tangled up with me, And I lost my head, The thought of all the stupid things I'd said. Oh no, what's this? A spider web, and I'm caught in the middle, So I turn to run, The thought of all the stupid things I've done, And I never meant to cause you trouble..."

"I don't appreciate the way you are speaking to me Victoriez Nicks and you will show me some respect!", Aunt Susan glared at me, her lips tightened into a thin line.

I narrowed my eyes, "I can speak to you however I want. We may be related, but you are no blood of mine. And, respect you?", I shook my head, "I don't. Not anymore." My voice was cold. It was a new trick I learned. Never yell. The words seem more powerful to me when I said them with my "inside voice". And boy, did I want my Aunt Susan to feel the power.

She was my mom's sister. She was also my mom's former best friend. My mom and Aunt Susan were also my dad's stepsisters. My grandmother, on my mom's side ended up marrying my grandpa, my father's dad, about five years ago. I was never sure what happened between my parents and my aunt, as I was merely thirteen at the time and the biggest problem I had paid attention to was a way to get rid of any acne that popped onto my face.

But I know a year after my grandma and grandpa got married, my father ended up going to jail. After that, Susan's visits became more and more infrequent. I never got the complete story behind the two of them, but when they had stopped talking, it was almost like they had just written each other off the face of the earth. I've seen pictures of them - the two of them barely a year and a half apart - smiling, wearing similar outfits, looking as if they had not a care in the world. Which brings me to the why's of today.

Like, why didn't they talk anymore? Why did Aunt Susan stop visiting? Why had my Aunt Susan become such a bitch in the past three years? Why couldn't I forgive her for tearing my family apart? Why did I have the feeling that she was to blame for my family being torn apart?

Aunt Susan put her hands on her hips, a move similar to one Mom would make, and pursed her lips, "Victoriez, your mother has asked me to stop in and check on you. I was on a business trip and since this was on the way there, I had told her I would.", she pointedly looked over to where Leira, Lennox, and the twins were standing, watching the scene unfold. "I can see she had just reasons."

I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms under my chest. I sighed, "No one needed you to drop in Aunt Susan. I was doing just fine."

Much to my dismay, Aunt Susan walked further into the house, her very professional black leather pumps clicking on the hardwood floor. She shook her head, staring at the trash covered ground, "Look at this.", she said pointing to a pile of beer cans and bottles that sat on the coffee table, "You call this 'fine'? You know, if you're momma had been here - "

My eyes hardened, "Yeah well, she's not. "

Suddenly, and to my surprise, Aunt Susan's forest green eyes suddenly began reflecting a look of sympathy, "Oh, that's right. She's visiting your father." She had pursed her lips in disdain when she said the word "father". It was like she had chewed on a sour piece of candy.

I was now critically aware of the other people in the room, watching my aunt and I. I became self-conscious, and clearing my throat I asked, "So how long are you staying, exactly?"

Aunt Susan pulled out her Blackberry and I watched her fingers hit some buttons before she put it away and said, "Well, I have to get going no later than two tomorrow, but you know I never like to do things last minute. So I guess I'll be leaving around ten, tomorrow. So where am I sleeping, Birdie?"

I stood there, gritting my teeth, looking for something to say. Anything. Because while I heard every word out of my Aunt Susan's mouth, my mind was tuned into the people standing next to my couch, looking back and forth between me and my aunt and I wondered what they were thinking. I rolled my eyes, disgusted that I still even cared what they thought, and turned my back to them so that I was fully facing my Aunt, "Well I can't volunteer my mom's room, so I guess you can sleep in my bed."

Aunt Susan nodded, "That'll be fine. If you show me the way, I'll just go settle in.", she smiled and was about to turn towards the hall where the bedrooms were but changed her mind to turn and say, "Oh, and meanwhile " , she looked pointedly at all of us and said, "You guys should get crackin' on getting this house turned right side up." She then smiled charmingly and turned to leave.

It really irked me how I hadn't seen my aunt in a whole year and a half - give or take a couple of weeks - and she wanted to come into my and my mom's home, giving orders. Which is why the next words came out of my mouth. "Maybe you should go to hell. ", I muttered under my breath. I turned around and was about to head to the kitchen.

But Aunt Susan had heard me and turned around with a hand on her two-hundred-dollar-suit clad hip and with narrowed eyes and a stiff voice asked, "Excuse me, young lady?"

At that moment I realized there were times when you had to pick your battles, and times when you had to retreat. Besides, I was winding down and my buzz was faded. I was too tired to argue so I answered, "Nothing, Aunt Susan." I still had enough energy left in me though, to roll my eyes and cross my arms under my chest.

I again turned to make my way to the kitchen, but this time Aunt Susan's voice rippled through my mind like a bullet, with what she said next. In the most sickly fake sympathetic voice I've ever heard, she said, "Oh, I understand perfectly now. You're following the example of that father of yours, and you've decided to pick up some of the habits that have gotten him where he is.", her voice hardened, "Disrespect, dear niece, will get you nowhere."

I was so shocked I didn't even turn around. I didn't move a muscle, not that I could anyways. She paused, but since my back was to her, I never knew what transpired in that little amount of time but then Aunt Susan made a final remark that had my head spinning in anger and humiliation, "Now clean this mess up. You're father lives in prison Victoriez, and you do not, so not caring about the area you live in is something you simply can't do."

That comment snapped me back to life very quickly. I was enraged and before I knew it, I was spinning around and my hands were shoving my aunt a step back, "Why are you such an evil, conniving, slimy bitch!" Aunt Susan's face register anger, shock, and embarrassment. No one, though, was angrier or more embarrassed than I was.

Someone was tugging on my arm and pulling me back, and I didn't even have to turn around to know it was Lennox.

Aunt Susan's face suddenly collapsed into a look of misery, and she clasped her hand over her mouth while she closed her eyes. She shook her head, as if to clear it and then said in a shaky voice, "Oh, Birdie, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to say that. It's just been a rough couple of months. Which is something I was supposed to be talking to you about, not snappin' at you like that. Not that that's any excuse, I'm the adult and I shouldn't have gone to such a raw patch, especially when I know what you -"

"Don't. You. Say. Another. Word.", my hands were shaking. This new level of emotion was one I had never reached before. I believe it was hysteria. I didn't know what to do, I didn't know what to think, and I didn't know what to say. A few minutes had passed and I had gotten myself under control a little more. Gently, I pushed Lennox's hand - that had still been holding my arm - and took a step forward. Not to close, but close enough, maybe a yard away. I raised my head to look my Aunt in the eye, and in an emotionless voice I said, "Go to bed Aunt Susan."

I was finally able to make my way to the kitchen without another word. And when I got there, I went right out the back door, around to the front of the house, and down the street, tears slowly making a pattern on my face.

[*********]

I really hated crying. It was one of those things that when it was happening, nothing could stop it. And when someone asks you what's wrong, it just makes you think about everything from the beginning, and you cry harder.

I had maybe walked a block when I heard running footsteps behind me. I turned my head and to my dismay it was Lennox, quickly making his way to my side. I wiped my face the best I could before he gently grabbed my shoulder and asked, "Everything okay?"

I rolled my eyes and shrugged off his hand, "Did everything look okay? Why do people always ask that question? It's so stupid. I'm sure not smiling and skipping, so what makes you think things are even close to okay?" I hadn't meant to do it. Attack him like that, I mean, but it seemed to be my response to everything these days.

His flinched, and a beat passed before he gave a dry chuckle and said, "Right. Well, when you want to stop sulking and actually talk, you might come find me then."

I narrowed my eyes and crossed my arms, "Where's Leira? Why isn't she out here? You're not my best friend."

He tilted his head, "Well, she was going to come and get you, but I told her to let me. "

I snorted, "So she takes orders from you now? That's grand. Nice to know who's side she's on." I took that moment to turn on my heel and began walking calmly the way I had been going.

He shook his head, "No, it's just.. she cares. About everyone's feelings, not just yours."

This silenced me. Because for once, I considered the fact that maybe he was right. I didn't appreciate Leira as half as much as I should. I sighed and admitted as much, "I understand. You're saying that Leira has balls to put up with my crap and still be her own person, basically?"

He nodded, "Mmm, more or less. She just knows how to see things from every angle, understand where everyone's coming from."

I crossed my arms again, "Right. Because Leira is just the balance of the Universe." Did I sound jealous? Maybe. But was I? Not really. I loved Leira, and I really did think she was the balance of the Universe, at least mine. She kept me grounded. She kept me sane.

And it was at that moment that I realized I never should have been mad at Leira in the first place. She had just been trying to be a good friend to me, and Lennox, and Zane, and Zoland. And thinking of Leira, it made me curious to know what she thought of the little squabble I had just had with my aunt. I stored it in my mind to ask her later, and then returned my attention to Lennox, "So why are you out here with me again?"

He tilted his lips into a half smile, and rubbing an index finger down my nose, said, "You, were supposed to be explaining yourself."

I gave him an incredulous look, "I hope you don't think I'm explaining myself to you."

His eyes bored into mine as he said, "I would think, after all we've been through, you would be able to talk to me."

I furrowed my brows and in an incredulous tone said, "All we've been through? We had sex! One time! And we're not even friends."

He grabbed my hand, and swinging it between us, smiled cheekily at me and said, "Sure we are, body 'ol pal!", he wrinkled his nose at me, "Don't be an ass. We're friends."

I raised a brow, "Oh, really? I don't remember you asking me to be my friend. And besides, I have a very particular circle of friends."

He shook his head and laughed, "You don't have a 'circle' as you put it. You have a... Leira. Whatever shape two people can make , that's what you have."

I smiled and wiggled my brows teasingly, "Exactly. Particular." After that, conversation ceased for a while, and we were just walking. It was at this time that I noticed our hands were still intertwined and swinging lightly between us. It was a weird feeling. But I had decided that it wasn't so bad.

We had walked around the corner, and were making our way back to my block when Lennox, looking up at the sky remarked, "You know, I could benefit you in this adventure of yours."

I furrowed my brows in confusion, "What are you talking about, Gray?"

He made a circular motion with his hand, "You know. I'm talking about this whole little rep you got going for yourself."

I laughed lightly and looked up at him curiously, "And just how are you supposed to be able to help me?"

He smiled, "By being your friend."

I raised my brow again, "Go on."

"Well you see, I have a so-so reputation at Marshall, you know? People don't know quite what to make of me. If we started hanging out, we would be... dynamic."

I rested my hand on my hip, "Lennox Gray, are you telling me you want to use me to gain popularity points?"

He shook his head and put his hands in his jeans pocket, "No, I'm telling you that I want us to do a little experiment. Zane, Zoland, Leira, you, and me. We'll eat at the same table. We'll hang out in the same places. We'll be like... like..."

"A clique?", I supplied.

He snapped his fingers and smiledc "Yeah, we'll be one of those." Tongue in cheek, I continued walking, Lennox following behind me in silence. I didn't really know what to say. And I couldn't think of a reason to say no.

When we got to my door, I turned to face Lennox. With a weary half-smile on his face, he inquired, "So?"

I stood there, my poker face on, before I smiled and said, "Sure, why the hell not?"

He smiled back at me before he stretched out his hand to me, "Alright then."

I shook his hand and said, "Alright then.

[*********]

We both walked back into the house, smiling tiredly. We found everyone - with the exception of Aunt Susan - sitting in the living room. I noticed that all the remnants of the party were stored away or thrown into the trash.

Smiling gratefully, I looked at everyone and said, "Thanks, guys."

Leira was the first one to stand and smile. She came over to me, and we hugged. I whispered, "I'm sorry."

She pulled back and smiled saying, "It's okay. We'll talk."

Lennox had gone to sit over on the couch were the twins her, while Leira and I had been standing by the door making up. They now all stood and came to where Leira and I stood. I gestured to them with a finger to my mouth to not make that much noise. I still had enough courtesy to let me aunt sleep in peace.

Zane was the first to speak, "So I hear we're forming an alliance now." He smiled, I would say, wickedly.

Leira turned her head to me, "Uuuh, what is he talking about Vicky?"

I shrugged, "Well... Lennox and I talked about it outside. He wants to be our 'friend'." I looked over at Lennox, barely containing my laughter.

Leira raised a brow, "Uh.. 'friend'?"

I nodded, "Yeah you know, hang out together, eat lunch, etcetera."

Leira nodded, "Oh.", she laughed lightly, "Yeah, makes total since."

Zoland yawned and stretched, "Is anyone else as tired as I am?"

I nodded and smiled, "Oh yeah. You guys should probably get going. Leira? Are you staying?"

Leira nodded, "For sure."

I looked over at the boys, "So see you guys tomorrow then?"

Lennox's eyes widened incredily, "You mean we can't crash here for the night?"

Leira and I looked at each other, and then we began to laugh. They shushed us, reminding me my aunt was in the other room. I whispered, "No, are you crazy? I wouldn't let you 'crash' even if if was just me and Leira! Have a safe trip home fellas."

Leira nodded in agreement, and also hugged each of them, "Night, oh wait, we'll walk you guys to the door."

With Lennox, Zane, and Zoland mock-protesting in whispers, we shuffled them towards and out the door. Leira hugged Zane one more time before him and Zoland were walking towards their car shobing and joking at each other. Leira smiled at Lennox and then stepped into the house, leaving him and me standing there. I raised a brow, "Well, what're you waiting for?"

He smiled and shook his head, "Nothing except for you to tell me goodnight."

I rolled my eyes and leaned against the doorframe, "It's funny because I could've sworn a goodnight was thrown in there when we were shoving you guys towards the door."

He shook his head and took a step forward to stand on the top step, "No, I want you, Victoriez, to tell me, Lennox, goodnight."

I stared at him for a moment, then glanced at the ground, and then back up at him. My voice - which I hadn't realized was low and husky - uttered, "Goodnight, Lennox."

He smiled and stepped back down, "Now see, was that so hard?"

I shook my head and chuckled lightly, "No, I guess not."

He joked, "Wait, no kiss?"

I snorted and rolled my eyes, "Not tonight."

"Okay, later." Finally, he began making his way down the street to Zane's car.

As I closed the door, turned off the hallway light, and made it to my mom's room where Leira sat watching a movie, I was smiling.

The party hadn't been bad. Not at all.

7: Cliques, Apologies, & Jessalyn

Chapter 6

"Maybe all the information you received, Well you should not believe, There's no proof... But we've got these ugly scars, On our infected hearts, Maybe it's time for a change..."

The whole thing was ridiculous and not likely to happen. I mean, a clique? We sounded like an 80's movie! Just thinking about the whole conversation between Lennox and me made me chuckle. And besides, it would never work for several reasons.

One, being that it made no sense. I mean, out of the blue all of a sudden Leira and I were chummy with the new kid and his "gang"? I thought about it , my brows furrowing as I turned over from my back to my side, adjusting to the feel of a bed that wasn't my own . I mean, sure we've spoken more than a few times in school , and more than a few people saw him drag me away from that whole scene with Marlow. Naturally, people would think the next step would be us hanging together exclusively.

I shook my head. No, absolutely not.

And then there was reason number two. I wasn't sure how close I wanted to get to Lennox. Since the day that I'd met him , I had been keeping my distance. There were things he didn't understand about me, and I liked it that way. I felt like if I were to spend any more time with him, he would manage to unravel more of the puzzle that was my past. And that was something I didn't want, nor could I afford to happen. It would also have me forming an attachment to him along with Zane and Zoland, who I found to be funny and pretty cool to hang out with and -

I turned over on to my other side, facing the window. It just wasn't going to happen. I wasn't going to allow myself to be sucked into building relationships with Lennox, Zoland, or Zane. They thought this was all a joke. That I was just playing "tough girl" because it was something fun to do. What they didn't know was that the reputation I built for myself at Marshall went beyond having a good time or even ruling the school. It was about pride. It was about choice. It was about retribution. It was about resentment.

I sighed as I sat up in my mom's bed, feeling the weight of my thoughts and secrets. I glanced at the clock that sat on her nightstand. It was 4 a.m. Sensing that sleep wasn't going to find me anytime soon, I climbed out of the bed, and made my way to the kitchen.

Walking down the hallway, my only source of light being the moon, I thought about the cookies I had stashed at the very top shelf and a glass of milk. I rubbed my eyes and yawned, as I walked through the doorway of the kitchen and made my way to the refrigerator.

"I couldn't find the light."

"Shit!", I gasped, as I bent to pick up the carton of milk I had nearly dropped on my foot. When I saw that the milk carton was fine, I sat it on the counter and quickly turned to face my aunt, "I mean shoot . Aunt Susan, you scared me." I walked over near the stove and turned on the overhead light.

"I'm sorry." , I turned to face my Aunt's apologetic eyes, "And not just for scaring you. For the things I said, as well."

I shrugged my shoulder, staring down at the floor, "It's okay." , I mumbled.

Aunt Susan shook her head, "No, it's not. I shouldn't have taken my frustrations out on you or embarrassed you in front of your friends like that."

I snorted and shook my head, "It's okay, really. And please, those people weren't my friends. Except for Leira."

Aunt Susan folded her hands on the tabletop, "Well, it didn't seem that way to me. They all seemed to care about your well-being."

I rolled my eyes as I unconsciously made my way to sit across from my aunt, "Please, the only thing they care about is having a good time. "

Aunt Susan just stared down at the glass of water she had sitting in front of her. After a moment, she raised her gaze to me, her brows furrowed, "Birdie, what on God's green earth is going on around here? You changed your hair, you're throwing parties? And not to mention you got this thing ", she pointed to my piercing, "on your lip, can you even chew with that thing?"

I chuckled, "Yeah, Aunt Susan, it's just a little stud."

Aunt Susan scoffed, "Put there for nothin' if you ask me. Anyways, you didn't answer me child. What's going on?"

I watched my hands tangle together underneath the table, "Nothing.", I shrugged and looked up at my aunt, "New town so I thought I'd try a new look, that's all."

Aunt Susan pursed her lips, "Please. If you think I believe that, you're as cuckoo as a clock on the wall!"

I chuckled at her use of words, "Well, Mom believes me. She says it looks like I'm finally taking an interest in my looks."

Aunt Susan took a sip from her mug and then rolled her eyes, "Your mom used to believe the moon was made of cheese. I wouldn't trust her opinion too much."

I laughed, but then slowly my laughter died. My mom and Aunt Susan used to be so close. I would have given anything to know what happened to changed that. No longer smiling, I asked, "Aunt Susan, what happened between you and mom?"

She paused, staring down into her glass. She looked up at me and shook her head, "Nothing happened. Nothing I have to tell, anyway. We just drifted apart."

I smiled sadly and mimicking Aunt Susan - down to the southern accent, I said, "If you think I believe that, you're as cuckoo as a clock on the wall."

Aunt Susan threw her head back and laughed. She smiled at me, and I smiled back. I forgave my Aunt. She was the only family I had, besides my mom and my grandparents. It was almost like it was mandatory.

As her smile slowly faded, Aunt Susan shook her head sadly and said, "Birdie, I'm sorry. But you're going to have to talk to your mother about this. I wouldn't feel right telling you the story, not without you're mom."

I nodded in understanding, but that still didn't quell the aching curiosity lodged into my heart. There were things they were hiding from me. All of them, meaning my mom, my aunt, my dad, and my grandparents. And whatever it was, I knew it would be the missing puzzle piece that would solve the big picture.

Suddenly becoming exhausted, I yawned and stretched my arms as I stood, "Well Aunt Susan, it's around that time.", I said, using her expression when she meant "bed time".

Aunt Susan nodded, "Yeah, it's gettin' there for me too.", she then smiled at me, "You know, you pull that southern accent off so well, anybody'd swear you were from Houston, Texas herself."

I laughed, "Of course. I've had to only listen to it my whole life.", and just before I walked out of the kitchen, I turned and smiled cheekily at my aunt, "And besides, when I was mad at you, mocking you ", I switched to her southern accent, " Was more fun than watching a live rodeo."

"I've never said a thing about a live rodeo! ", Aunt Susan rolled her eyes.

And I laughed all the way back to my mom's room.

[*********]

"So, how's your aunt? ", Leira asked.

I smiled , as I turned the knob to adjust the radio to the station I wanted, "She's good . She left this morning . I gave her a hug before she left. "

Leira smiled over at me , "So everything's straight between the two of you then ? "

I shrugged as I backed out of the driveway , "Well , I still have a lot of questions left unanswered but I think that we " , I paused as I struggled to find the words to describe what 'we' were, "... We're better than we were before. " I nodded , satisfied with the answer that popped into my head.

It was then that I told Leira about the whole conversation my aunt and I had had the night before. It was funny , but when I was done , I got the sense that Leira was proud of me . And it made me feel good .

It also made me realize that for the first time since moving to Boulder , it mattered what someone outside of my home - which consisted of my mom and myself - thought about me . Before I did something stupid , like start crying , in the most normal tone I could manage , I told Leira , "Y'know through this whole thing , you've been a great friend to me Leira . And I just wanted you to know.. that it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of me here . They don't know me like you do.. So I guess what I'm trying to say is - yours is the only opinion that matters."

The only sound in the car, was the sound of the radio . I quickly glanced over at Leira . She had this goofy expression on her face , with her hand over her mouth and her big green eyes blinking rapidly , "You ... love me ? "

We both burst out laughing. Leira wiped her eyes, "So does this mean , we're like girlfriend and girlfriend now?" , she asked jokingly.

I rolled my eyes, "Shut up , Carson . I spill my guts out to you and this is the thanks I get. "

She chuckled and hugged me, "Oh, don't worry. It's appreciated."

I playfully shrugged her off, "Leira! Don't you see that I'm trying to drive here! Cut it out!"

She sat back in her seat and closed her eyes, a smile on her face. She began singing lightly along to the song playing on the radio .

I began singing along with her , and the rest of the drive to school was spent with the sound of our voices filling the car.

[*********]

As I got my book bag from the back of my car , two things became clear to me.

One was, that today was going to be no easy task . I mean , here I was pretending to be the girl who had it all , with the attitude to prove it , and the people to back it up . Those people being my supposed "clique". Leira, Zane , Zoland , Lennox, and me . And I wasn't too sure if that's what I wanted. I mean, when it was just Leira and me , I never had to keep the "mask" on in front of her . I didn't completely trust - nor did I want to - Zane , Zoland , or really Lennox . So for the meantime , they got "the bitch" .

The second thing I realized was , that I was really doing it . People watched, when my cherry red VW pulled up into the school parking lot . People smiled tentatively at me , and some never even looked my way. But somehow , I still felt they knew I was there. The point being was - people at this school were interested in me .

And why not ? I was the stylish new girl , from the City of Angels challenging head cheerleaders and asshole teachers.

All of a sudden though , I found my brows furrowing into a frown , as Leira led us to her locker first . Was that really what I had aspired to be ? This untouchable girl , that some feared ? And those who didn't fear me , saw me as bad news . Someone to stay clear of .

I nodded my head, unperceived. Of course it was. It was what I wanted . To set people apart from me , to keep my feelings and myself safe. This wasn't going to be like Los Angeles . No matter what I had to do .

"... so I told her that we would come."

I shook my head, focusing on Leira's words , "What? Told who we would go where?"

Leira rolled her eyes as she opened her locker, "You weren't even listening to me. I saaaid , Sunny Clarkson asked if we would go to her birthday party - obviously , asking me because I'm the less .. " , Leira smiled over at me , " aggressive , of the two of us . And I told her we would come to support her. "

I rolled my eyes , and sighed , "Leira , aren't you tired of partying ?"

Leira gasped , mock surprisingly , "Who gets tired of going to a good party?" She chuckled as I narrowed my eyes at her . We then walked the few feet to my locker .

As I emptied my book bag - into my new locker - I made a sound of disgust , "Can you believe this is the best this school could do? They wouldn't look into who did the damage or find any witnesses . No , instead they get the janitor to clean it up and assign me a new locker. "

Leira rolled her eyes , "Don't act like you don't like your new locker anyways . It's right next to the water fountain, and it's closer to me!" Leira smiled brightly.

I wrinkled my nose at her , and stuck out my tongue , "Shut up." We both giggled , and as I reached down to pick up my bag from off the floor , I turned just in time to watch Lennox , Zane , and Zoland walk into the doors of Marshall High like they owned the place.

Lennox's tall, lean form was the first I saw , with the twins following suit not far behind him. They were headed in our direction .

My stomach dropped . Panicking slightly , I turned to Leira and whispered , "What do we do!"

She shook her head , "Say hi. Hi , guys! " She waved behind me .

I turned to find the three of them no more than three feet away. Lennox hugged Leira, while Zane and Zoland smiled and nodded to me.

I turned back to close my locker , then rolled my eyes and gave an exaggerated sigh , "And here we go . "

Lennox put a hand to his chest and gave me an offended look, "Starting the morning off bad already, Nicks? How are we ever supposed to pull this off if you can't even be nice to me?"

I smiled tightly at him , "I don't know , maybe we should just quit the whole thing right now. " I adjusted the strap of my book bag before I began to walk down the hall.

I couldn't do it! I may have been good at pretending to be someone who doesn't care and needs no one on the outside . But on the inside I was still that girl that needed everyone to like her . Who needed everybody to be her friend. At any cost.

"Hellooo.. " , I stopped abruptly when I saw Lennox's hand wave in my face. I turned to him with my brows furrowed in irritation , "What?"

He dropped his hand to his side. The way his eyes intently searched mine , caused a flip in my heart and my jaw to clench. It was an uncomfortable scrutiny, made even more uncomfortable because I knew he saw exactly what he was looking for.

"Who needs help?", he said it just loud enough to where only I could hear him .

I shook my head , "No one. " , shaking off the serious moment , I turned to the twins and Leira. Smiling, I sighed and said , "Well - let's set off troops!"

I wanted to laugh at the look of some of the students' faces . But then , I would have liked to seen us in their eyes . What did we look like to them ? I was walking next to Leira , talking and laughing - and giving the occasional "look" to outsiders.

Despite that , I was still aware of Lennox talking, joking , and laughing with Zane and Zoland behind us. I was half expecting something to happen. Like someone jumping into our face. Or someone tripping one of us because we thought we were so cool .

That's what I couldn't understand. It was always like this . Everywhere you went, people would claim that there was no such thing as a "popular group" or a "nerd group". That everyone was just friends with people that held the same interest as them .

But there was always that one person who wished they were friends with people they considered "untouchable". Or who felt it unnecessary to talk to certain people . Those were the people on top . The popular , the funny - the ones other people believed had the best time in high school . The loners, the smart people who got straight A's and thought about the future past all the high school drama - were the ones people believed were just there. Nuisances .

In Los Angeles , I always wondered where did I fit into in all of this? But here in Boulder , Colorado I didn't have to wonder. Because I created myself. I was one of the untouchable. No one could stop me but me. Not even Leira.

"Y'know , you're looking scarier than usual. What's going on?", Leira whispered , leaning into me.

I shook my head and turned my frown into a small smile, "Nothing . I was just thinking about something."

Leira eyed me curiously , "You wanna talk about it?"

I shook my head again and smiled, "Nope - it's not that important . Really , I'm fine. " And with my head held high , I walked into Mr. Hummer's class not missing any pair of eyes, my own filled with scorn. It was a look I had mastered. And it had been used way before I got to Boulder. I sat down at my desk , suddenly feeling very tired . Tired of pretending and tired of hiding my true feelings. And as I glanced up and my eyes caught Lennox - smirking as he walked into the class much as I had - I began to feel another emotion. Anger. And it was towards Lennox. It all made perfect sense to me .

I didn't care that this plan was mine originally.

I didn't care that I had started the fight with Marlow (even though she was also part to blame) .

I didn't care that I had dragged Leira into this with me .

I didnt care that I had slept with Lennox , and it had been my first time .

I didn't care . What I was so angry about was that because of him , my head was in emotional turmoil . I felt guilty , justifed , sad , lonely , crowded , angry , and tired all at the same time . I liked him . I wanted to hate him. I wanted him gone . I wanted him around all the time . All these emotions made me .. vunerable to him.

I hadn't realized I had been glaring , until Mr. Hummer walked into the classroom and with a booming voice only teachers had, said , "Alright ! We are starting a new lesson today ! Get your books out!"

I blinked and saw that Lennox had seen me glaring . I knew this because he was looking at me with curiosity in his eyes and a frown tilting his mouth .

I turned around to get my Geometry book and became very interested in the shapes Mr. Hummer was drawing on the board .

That , had been strike one.

[*******]

I didn't really speak to any of my "friends" until lunch. Dr. Flog had us studying and taking a test , so I didn't have to get into my group with Zane and Lennox . The only class I sat next to Leira in was Geometry .

I also hadn't been involved in any drama all day. Until Lunch.

I was the last person - well , part of my "clique" anyways - to enter the cafeteria . I did that thing where I didn't look like I was searching for them , but simply observing my surroundings .

I was though , and I finally spotted them at the second to last table in the back.

And sitting not too far away , I also saw Marlow and the rest of the cheerleaders. Marlow smiled and waved at me. I resisted giving her the finger, and just ignored her. Instead, I went to the line to grab some lunch the caf was serving and then made my way over to the vending machines to buy a drink. It was there, when I was trying to decide between Mountain Dew or Dr. Pepper , when he came up.

He was maybe an inch taller than me. His arms weren't bulging with muscles under his navy blue t-shirt , but it was easy to tell he worked out. He sported a shoulder bag on his left shoulder and a Nike gym bag on his right. He was light-skinned, his hair was wavy. His eyes were a neutral brown, but he had long eyelashes and, abnormally, freckles across his normal , perfect nose. His lips were medium-sized and sort of round and went well with his square jaw.

To put it simple, he was beautiful.

My little assessment took all of five seconds. I had unconsciously chosen Dr. Pepper. I bent down to get my soda, still glancing over at the guy next to me, surveying the chips.

"If you take a picture , it'll last longer." , his voice was strong. Not deep really just..strong. I blinked as I realized he was talking to me.

Gathering my wits , I shook my head as I sat my soda on my tray, "Nah, I'd rather just make you uncomfortable by staring."

He gave me a leery look and that's when we both laughed. It was weird, how I was instantly interested in him. Like I couldn't help but want to know what he was about. What was his favorite color? Where did he live? Where did he come from? Why hadn't I seen him before? Did he like animals? Did he like nice girls pretending to be bad? Everything.

He held out his hand to me, and balancing my tray between my side and my left arm, I shook it. "The name's Dominic Bradley. You can call me Dom . Or Nick. Either one is cool ."

I smiled , "Victoriez . You can call me Vicky ."

He raised his brow , "Wait - you wouldn't by chance be that Vicky?

I raised my brow back at him , "I dunno. Would I?"

He smiled , "Yeah , I think you are." Since he was still smiling at me, and not running away , I decided not to take offense.

I flipped my hair out of my eye and laughed, "Glad to know my reputation exceeds me."

He wrinkled his nose, and teasing - I think - said, "Well how bad can you be if you use big words like 'exceeds'?"

We were both silent for a moment, not sure how to continue the conversation. That's when I nodded my head, "So I guess I'll see you around."

His smile widened as he nodded, "Yeah , anytime you want." He winked at me.

Before either of us could move away though , a feminine voice called out sharply, "Dominic!"

We both turned our heads and to my dismay, looked right at the pom-pom queen. Marlow.

I raised my brow in amusement. Because if Dominic was Marlow's new boytoy , I would have the laugh of the century.

Her smile was tight when she addressed Dominic, "Nicky, when I told you to make friends, I meant with actual people. Not things like this."

The only response she got from me was a snort, dry chuckle , and then a roll of my eyes.

Dominic looked from me , then to Marlow, and then did it again before saying, "Uh.. I was just grabbing a bag of chips .. but thanks for the concern." He turned his back to Marlow , facing me. Grabbing my hand , he smiled , "So I'll guess I'll see you around."

I looked past him at Marlow's reddish face, before I looked into his eyes and smiled warmly, "Yeah , anytime. " And before anything else was said , I walked towards my table.

That , had been strike two.

I expected it to be awkward , but as I got to the table , I was greeted with warm smiles . Well , three out of four . Lennox just stared at me .

Ignoring him , I sat down , nodded , and questioned , "What's up?"

Zane smiled at me and was the first to reply, "We were just talking about you ."

Leira, Lennox, and Zoland all gave Zane wide-eyed looks that said "Shut up now", which made me raise my brow and ask , "Oh, really? Do tell?"

Zane shrugged , "We were just saying how you seem a little off your.. A-Game today. You aren't being bitchy.. just mean and introspective ."

I guffawed and sat back in my chair on the bench , "Well aren't you all being perceptive." I glanced at Leira's red face, Zoland's blank face, Zane's smiling face . And Lennox's hard face.

And before I could stop myself, the words were out of my mouth , "What crawled up your butt and died?"

Lennox looked at me, and it was a look that said "Do you really want to go there?" I stared back, making sure mines' read "Yeah , bring it right here."

He flexed his jaw muscles - like that was supposed to scare me - and said , "Nothing. Why would anything be wrong with me ? I've got friends, I've got enemies , and I have a reputation for being bad. Seeing as , I hang with the new 'bad bitch' in town." He rolled his eyes.

In narrowed my eyes , "Y'know , if u have something to say to me Gray, I think you should say it."

Zoland popped a tattertot in his mouth, before he rolled his eyes and sighed, "What is with you two and the drama?"

I shook my head and leaned back, crossing my arms over my chest , "It's not me. Lennox seems to have a problem today, and as a friend , I'm asking -" , I looked back over at Lennox , "What the hell is your problem?" Strike. Three.

Lennox's lips formed a cold smile as he threw his napkin on the table and stood up slowly. He then rounded the table so that he was standing right in front of me, bent so that we were eye level. I managed not to lean back like I wanted to , with him inches from my face.

In a quiet voice , so quiet I think I was the only one who heard his words, Lennox said, "My problem is that here we have a girl pretending to be something she isn't , playing games even though she doesn't realize that when it comes down to us - it's not a game . ", he stood up and shook his head and chuckled dryly, "But then who really knows? Maybe you are more of the bitch than we think . Than you think ."

I stared up at him , my eyes wide , my lips stiff. How did I respond to that? Well, the answer was that I didn't , and we just continued to stare. When Lennox's glare softened , it was then that I noticed a tear had escaped my eye. W.T.F?

"Vicky - "

I shook my head and stood. Just like that , my eyes were dry and I knew, hard and cold , "No. I think I'm done eating now. You guys keep Lennox company. I'm gonna go."

Leira shook her head and stood up , "Vick , do u want me to - ?"

I waved her away , "No, it's cool.", I then smiled as I gathered my things preparing to leave, "Leira I'll see you later. Zane, Zoland.", and backing up , my smile faded as I looked at Lennox's blank face, staring at the floor. I didn't say anything. In place of words I snorted and chuckled humorlessly .

Tongue in cheek, I then spun on my heel , and walked out of the cafeteria.

[*********]

"Did you really have to do that?", Leira asked, scolding. She was leaning back in her chair, her arms folded across her chest.

"Sorry.", Lennox stated blankly.

Zoland punched him in the arm, "Yeah , what was all that for?"

Lennox just shook his head. His jaw ticked as he thought about the reason he had gotten so frustrated. It had all started with this morning when he had glanced over to smile at her. Instead he connected with eyes filled with anger and blame. And for what? He still didn't know.

Then, she wanted to flirt with some guy next to the vending machines. The freaking vending machines! As if she didn't know...

And then the final insult. She came over here talking crap to him because he was edgy. Ninety percent of the time they were around each other, she was either angry, sad, or distant. So excuse the hell out of him, if he wasn't happy-go-lucky at that moment.

He shook his head as he stood, "I need to walk guys. Clear my head a little."

No one said anything as he grabbed his backpack and followed the direction Vicky had just exited out of.

And it wasn't mentioned when they didn't see Vicky or Lennox for the rest of the day.

[*********]

I had decided I needed to breath. It had been so long since I found myself alone outside of my own house. I thanked my mother in my head for deciding to save money to buy me a car so that I didn't have to concern myself with transportation. My baby - my VW - didn't give me too many problems on the road. So I decided to take to the streets and see where I ended up.

Now, if you've never tried driving without a destination, never think about doing it. One reason being, it wastes gas. Secondly, you always end up having some kind of destination in mind . Some place interesting. Some place fun. Some place mysterious.

Which is why I found myself pulling into the lot of Gus's Bar, once again. I walked into the double doors, expecting chaos.

But it was barely one o'clock , and only a few customers loitered the bar area. A couple of men in suits were having a business meeting. Hoping to be ignored, I didn't stand too long to the entrance. I made my way over to a corner table.

It was a full ten minutes before I was noticed. The waitress came up to me, a tiny notepad in hand. I looked up at her face through the cloud of smoke that seemed to automatically filter the air. It was then that I realized that it was the same waitress from my first visit. Marilyn?... Jocelyn? ...

"Well, look who we have here! It's the big little girl.", she smiled. Today, her gum was green. She began chewing again as she stated, "Just in case you don't remember, my name is Jessalyn. So what can I get you today?"

I shook my head, "Nothing right now. I don't really have a mind for anything."

She leaned in close, just as she had the night before, "Y'know, it's against the rules to let someone sit in without ordering anything.", she stood up and smiled, "But I like you, so you can stay."

As she turned to flounce away, I found myself blurting out, "Why?"

She turned around, her blue eyes amused, "Why what, Sugar?"

I licked my lips , seeing how odd my question was. But still I asked, "Why do you like me?"

She laughed, and turned to face me fully, her hands on her gently flared hips, "I'm not sure I know what you're asking me."

I shook my head and sat back , "Nevermind. And uh, actually , if I could get a Coke that would be great."

She smiled and nodded. She almost turned around, but then she held up a pink fingernail, "Wait just a sec. I'm going on break in about..", she confronted the lit up clock on the wall, " thirty seconds, as a matter of fact." Her heels clacked on the scarred marble floor as she walked out of site, behind the bar and through a swinging red door.

At first, I thought she had told me that because she didn't want to serve me a Coke. But then when I saw her come from behind the bar, and then towards my table, I realized she meant to take her break with me.

And she had brought me my Coke. I smiled warmly.

She sat down with a thump on the opposite chair of me. She smiled , which I noticed she did a lot and said, "Now, seeing how we're friends now, I think you should call me Jessie." She held out her hand , with its long slender fingers.

I shook it, "The name's Victoriez. Or Vicky."

She folded her hands on top of the table and tilted her head, "Now, that is one interesting name. Where'd your momma get it?"

I shook my head and smiled whimsically, "Actually, my dad gave it to me."

She raised a brow, "Doesn't sound like you're too proud of that fact."

I waved my hands as I took a sip of the Coke that had been placed in front of me, "It's not that. I like my name a lot. It's just.."

She smiled understandingly, "That's another story for another time."

I nodded. We then began to talk about her. She was from Kansas. Her full name was Jessalyn Marie-Rose Scott. Surprisingly, she was only twenty-one. She laughed at my surprise at her age.

"Yeah, well I started working for Gus about two years ago, when I first moved to Boulder. The pay was good, and the tips were greater.", she laughed, "So I've stayed working here ever since. Even though old Gus went and gave himself a heart attack and now Gus the second - or Gus Jr. , I just like calling him Gus the second - has taken over." The last part was said with disdain.

It was my turn to raise my brow, "You don't sound too happy about it.", I inquired.

She shrugged and waved my statement, "As of now, I figure he's harmless. He pays fair and keeps his hands close to his stomach.", she chuckled, but sobered and shook her head when she said, "But those hazel eyes of his say a lot of things his mouth and his hands, don't."

"You seem to be a good reader of people.", I noted.

She smiled, "Just calling it how I see it." She glanced at the clock and her eyes widened, "Lord, it's been fifteen minutes already!" She stood up, and I did too preparing to leave.

We smiled at each other, before she said, "Well, my break's over. But like I said , I like you. You ever want to talk or hang out, you know where to find me."

"I don't know how many more times they'll let me sneak in here."

She just winked and said, "That's why it pays to make friends with security. Doesn't hurt that you aren't lacking any in the looks department either."

She reminded me so much of my Aunt Susan, I laughed. A genuine laugh , that tugged at my stomach. I waved goodbye as I made my way to the door.

I heard her voice call to me, "Don't be a stranger!", before I was walking out into the sun-streaked streets. I was still smiling as I got into my car. When I had first walked into Gus's, my stomach had been cramped and my head clouded with anger and a little embarrassment , thanks to one Lennox Gray. But as I left, I felt goofy, light, and energized.

Jessalyn Marie-Rose Scott was one funny, cheerful , and special person . And I knew for a fact that that wouldn't be the last time I saw her.

8: Lennox, Lennox, and.. What!?

Chapter 7

"It makes perfect sense, And all at your expense. I'm taking full control, So you just sell your soul.."

Lennox had no clear destination as he made his way out of the cafeteria. He knew why he had blown up at Vicky, but he didn't know why he didn't even feel like he should apologize.

He scoffed. She was the Big Bad Wolf. She could handle it and besides. She'd deserved it. Lennox shook his head, knowing even if she did deserve it, that didn't make it right.

Lennox sighed as fresh damp air filled his lungs, as he made his way to the side parking lot of the school, where the teachers usually parked.

He sat down on the ground with his back against a wall, behind the front of a car, to keep his tall frame out of sight, lest someone happened to walk by, and returned to his thoughts.

He swallowed hard. I called her a bitch. He shook his head. The worst part was the tears he saw gathering in her eyes before she'd hardened and walked away. At that moment, he wished he knew where she had run off to so that he could apologize. Then his jaw firmed. No. Since the day they met, all he received from her was attitude and she'd been making it seem as if he were the bad guy. This was just rolling with the punches, he convinced himself.

He put his head in his hands as he rested his elbows on his knees. He knew why he was so volatile today. It was because of the package his father had sent him. He hadn't opened it the day it came, but eventually he worked up the nerve to do so. It had contained a sketchbook, with dozens of elaborate expressive drawings. They were designs and pictures around words like Sorry, Betrayal, Honor, Pride, and Love. There were some that said "Happy Birthday" with balloons and cakes and confetti. Then there had been the letter.

Lennox barely remembered his father. The last time he had physical contact with him he had been five. The last time he talked to him was through a glass wall, and he had been ten. Visiting him in prison had made Lennox so depressed though, that he decided not to go back. Later, his mother decided the same thing. Around the time she met Bruce.

Lennox swallowed hard again. He tried shifting his thoughts to something else. He didn't want to deal with that at that moment. But all he did was go from thinking about one person, to another. Victoriez.

He didn't know why, but he liked her. There was something about her that made him want to crack open her mind and know what she was all about. Everything about her. He was especially curious about this "hardcore female" routine she put on. What had started that? He knew there were other things to her, because he saw it every time he looked into her eyes.

There would be times where they would be hanging out with everyone, and she would glance at him and not even know that her gaze would soften for just a millisecond before she would turn away or put up a blank face.

She was careful. Lennox knew he wasn't the most open person and he knew too that he could be intense a lot of the time. Maybe because he was so observant and introspective, but what ever the reason he wanted to know Victoriez Nicks. And he wanted to know why he wanted to know her so much.

He should apologize. He shook his head. He didn't know what to do. And as he heard the bell ring signaling the end of lunch, he decided to take the rest of the day off. He needed to think some more.

[********]

The "gang" and I hadn't really spoken a lot the rest of the week.The bit of comfort we had begun feeling around each other had become slightly strained because of Lennox and me. Even Leira acted a little distant, and although we did still talk and hung out, it seemed she had more to say to the twins. Also, for some reason, of which I was grateful, Leira had decided not to bring up the episode with Lennox. I didn't know how to feel about our last argument.

And I could not figure out for the life of me what his deal was! I knew I acted a little more rough than normal with Lennox, but no more than any other day. And although I knew Lennox liked to bother me a lot, he would never snap at me the way he did on Monday. He had said I was a major bitch. Basically. Maybe more than I thought . Maybe more than he thought. As I replayed it back in my mind, my heart-felt heavier and my eyes started to burn, making me blink.

I shook my head in disgust. Why should I care about anything he had to say? He was just some guy who had a chip on his shoulder walking around trying to fix everyone else's problems instead of focusing on his own. Forget him.

I shrugged my shoulders. It was really all I could do. Stressing myself over something that hadn't or wasn't going to change wasn't helping anything. Especially if I wasn't willing to talk to the person who was the cause of that stress.

I stretched my arms and legs as I rolled out of bed. It was a blessed Saturday. I ran my hand over my hair as I glanced at the clock on my nightstand. It was just a little after eleven. I walked over to my dresser and checked the envelope my mom had left me that had spare cash inside. I had three hundred dollars left. I smiled as I made my way to the kitchen. The sun was shining bright through the windows. It was a beautiful and sunny day. Why not spend it shopping with the rest of mom's money? I had plenty of food left and I didn't think my mom would be gone much longer if I didn't.

So after I made myself a bowl of cereal, I hopped in the shower. Within thirty minutes , I was rushing out the door.

[********]

The mall was crowded. Which had been expected, seeing as it was Saturday. It had crossed my mind, but only after I was inside the mall, that I probably should have texted Leira to come. Deciding that it wasn't too late , I pulled out my phone to text Leira, Yo, meet me at the mall?

I glanced around, looking for a store that might interests me as I waited for Leira to text back.

A couple of minutes later, my phone went off. Sorry, can't :/ Watching Max.

I sighed. Max was Leira's six-year-old brother. Oh well, I thought, I'll just buy her something nice.

After roaming around in a couple of stores, my stomach began to rumble. As I walked towards the food courts, it was then that I remembered that I wasn't the biggest fan of shopping for hours.

As I sat down and bit into my Rally Burger, a voice had me pausing, "Well look-ey here. Fancy seeing you here!"

I turned wide eyes and cheeks full of burger towards the voice. It was Jessalyn. I smiled before I remembered I had food in my mouth. I gave her an apologetic look as I grabbed a napkin, chewed, and then swallowed.

"Hey Jess.", I smiled at her when I finished.

Exactly as she had done that time at the bar, she plopped in the seat across from me.

She smiled warmly, "Doing some shopping or do you just like the burgers here?"

I chuckled, "Both."

She nodded, "Cool." I slid my boat of fries in front of her, and raised my brow suggestively. "Thanks."

I nodded and bit into my burger again. We settled into a kind of comfortable but kind of awkward silence as we looked around and people-watched.

I was about to attempt the start-up of a conversation when I was interrupted by another voice coming from behind me, "Thanks for leaving me. I mean, it's one thing to ditch me but to ditch me to meet up with your secret girlfriend? How rude!"

I turned in shock at the sound of the voice. It was a girl. She was short and slim with wildly curly black hair that stopped just below her shoulders. Her green eyes narrowed on Jessalyn. When I turned around they switched to me. The girl dismissed me with the roll of her eyes, and focused on Jessalyn again, "Can we go?"

Jessalyn pursed her lips and crossed her legs haughtily, "I don't know why you're being so rude, but you can just plop your butt right here", Jessalyn pointed to the seat next to her, "or you can wait in the car." She smirked.

The girl rolled her eyes, and then decided. Instead of sitting in the seat Jessalyn had pointed out though, she sat in the one next to me.

I watched both girls have a staring match for a moment. Taking a sip of my soda, I muttered, "You two gotta be sisters."

I didn't think they heard me as they continued to stare at each other, but as soon as I thought that the girl stuck her tongue out at Jessalyn. Jess laughed.

I smiled, feeling a little awkward. It was obviously a "them" thing. I smiled at both and continued to eat. While I was munching on french fries, the girl stuck her hand out in front of me.

I leaned back so I could look at her face. She gave a nod and a lop-sided smile, "Hi. The name's Darby. I'm this hideous thing's hot younger sister."

I laughed at her humor and slapped hands with her, "Victoriez."

She swayed and smiled, "Hey, Vicky."

I laughed, "Hi.. Darbs? Dee? Bee?"

We laughed together and she shook her head, "Nah, it's just Darby.", she narrowed her eyes mock-threateningly, "You would be wise to remember that."

I laughed again and looked over at Jessalyn, who was looking at her sister shaking her head and smiling. I liked Darby instantly.

"Darby's gonna be staying with me for a semester, it looks like.", Jessalyn explained to me, "She's fifteen so she'll be a sophomore at that little high school you go to Vick." Jessalyn smiled as if the idea pleased her very much.

I nodded and looked over at Darby, "That's cool. It'll be fine.", I rolled my eyes as I took another sip of soda, "I doubt anyone's going to bother you."

Noticing how disappointed I seemed, Darby shook her fist in the air, "Darn. I was hoping someone would so bother me. Throw my books in the trash or push me down the stairs or something." She looked at me wide-eyed.

I laughed, "No I didn't mean it like that. It's just... ah, it's complicated." I shrugged, not really wanting to get into the full story.

Darby's lips twisted as she thought about that. I guess deciding to drop the subject, she shrugged her shoulders, "Okay."

I stayed in the mall another hour with Darby and Jessalyn before I decided to leave.

[*********]

I didn't particularly feel like going home, but I didn't feel like hanging out with anyone either. After I said my goodbyes to Jessalyn and Darby, I sat in my car, thinking. Where could I go? Faces flashed through my mind, and then I paused. I smiled to myself as I thought of my destination.

Within a week of my moving to Boulder, I'd met Leira. She had taken me around the neighborhood a little bit, and there was one place in particular that I fell in love with.

About an hour later I pulled over on the side of the road, staring up at a vast bunch of leafy, green trees. I could hear the flow of the water from where I stood. I tiptoed and slid my way through mud and leaves for about ten minutes before I was standing next to Boulder Creek.

Everything about the creek was soothing. From the sound of the flow, to the rustling of the trees. It was peaceful and calming. I particularly liked this area because it was one of the parts of the creek that were less frequented, due to the lack of docks or bridges.

It's funny, I thought as I layed down on my back on a large flat rock, that nestled into the ground close to the creek. I had been trying so hard to not make Boulder like Los Angeles. And although tables were turned, and the situations were completely different, I still felt... the same.

I still felt alone.

I still felt like no one understood.

I still felt like bursting into tears.

I still felt unhappy.

I snorted as I felt a tear tickle my ear. I swiped my cheek quickly and snorted again as I sat up. The story of the life of a teenager. I shook my head, stared into the soft flow of the creek. What was wrong with me? Why couldn't I ever be normal?

And I had no one to blame but myself. I put myself into these kinds of situations. Unhappy situations, that is. It was at that moment I understood that what I was doing would have never worked. The whole point was for me to put myself at a distance from everyone. The cool girl from Los Angeles, who acted as if she were better than everyone...

I shook the heavy feeling off as I took another deep breath. Everything I was thinking wasn't exactly true though, was it? I had Leira. She wasn't with me at the moment, but she was someone who cared about me. She was the only one who knew the real me. Of course, I hadn't told Leira everything. I mean she knew the plan, but she didn't know the "why" ...

I sighed as I took one last glance at the river. It did soothe me, up to a point. Now, all I felt was really tired. I stood and made my way through the trees and back to my car.

[**********]

i pulled up to the driveway of my house. I had been so preoccupied with singing along with the radio and grabbing my bags out the backseat that I didn't notice until I got out that the garage door was open. I stared at my mom's car, blinking, for ten whole seconds before I moved.

I felt five again as happiness and excitement filled my heart. I had really missed my mom. I knew I was probably going to be in a bit of trouble, especially if she had talked to Aunt Susan, but I would welcome even her scolding, I missed her so much. I hurried into the house, unconsciously letting my shopping bags fall next to the door.

"Mom?!". I yelled, looking around the house. I got no response. I furrowed my brows as I made my way to the living room. No signs of her.

I shrugged off my jacket as I retraced my steps out of the living room and started towards her bedroom.

"Mom?", I widened her door and that's when I saw her. "Mom!", I smiled brightly as I opened her door fully. And that's when I saw that she wasn't alone. My smile instantly dropped into a stunned, confused frown. "Mom?"

"Vicky! Baby, I missed you so much!", my mom ran to me and hugged me tightly. Although, I was still frowning I held on to her just as tight.

My voice was shaky, "I missed you too, mom. What's...?" My heartbeat began to accelerate. There was a guy in my mother's room. I openly gawked at him. He stood tall in jeans, a t-shirt, a brown sports jacket, and stubble all along his jaw.

And eyes that I had stared into for sixteen years.

I looked at my mom, as my throat constricted, "Mom?"

Tears began to well in my mom's eyes, as she looked over to the man and then back to me, "Victoriez... Honey.. "

The man began walking towards me. Strangely, panic began to fill me and I felt it bubbling up my throat. I hadn't realized I was shaking my head or that tears were welling in my eyes.

The man stopped as he stared at me, he was only about two feet away. His voice was more raspy, but it was still the voice that had been etched painfully into my brain. I closed my eyes as he said, "Victoriez, baby .. I'm home."

Before he had even finished his sentence though, I was unconscious.

9: Soap Operas

Chapter 8

"Heaven is a place on earth with you. Tell me all the things you want to do. I heard that you like bad girls. Honey, is that true?"

This might have been one of those moments. One of those great moments when all you ever wanted, happens. Or you dream about something so often, that when it actually happens, you don't know what to do or what to say. And of course, there's the inevitability that moments like these never go how you think they will. How you dreamt they would.

Although I knew I couldn't exactly control it, I was embarrassed when I opened my eyes. I mean fainting, right there in the doorway, I felt melodramatic. I felt like we were in a soap opera, and I was the overachiever actress, fainting at the sight of my father's surprise return. Even though it was a really big deal. Gigantic.

But I guess I fainted because my body also understood how important this moment was. I needed to regroup.

For four years, I held on to the belief that I had nothing left for my dad except for anger. I was so angry at him. Anger, hate, disappointment. Before today, I knew for a fact that if I ever saw him again, I wouldn't have anything nice to say. I would yell at him how much he hurt me, how much I hated him and how I never wanted to see him again. I would tell him that I blamed him for our family breaking up.

But when I opened my eyes and saw my mom and my dad kneeling over me, I choked up. It was like all the dark feelings went away. "Dad?", I sobbed. I know. I was five all over again.

I wrapped my arms around his neck as he lifted me off the floor into a bear hug. "Oh, Victoriez, honey...", my dad was at a loss for words. My eyes had been either closed or blocked with tears but when I blinked to clear my vision, my eyes locked with my mom who was standing by her bed with tears in her eyes.

I moved to my dad's side so I could open up for my mom. She walked over to us to join in the hug.

We stood there for a moment, crying and hugging. One small, happy family reunited.

But of course, it wasn't that simple. I was disgusted by the amount of times it rarely was. As soon as all of our tears dried up, questions began forming in my head.

I pulled away from my mother and father, and took a step back, "I don't understand. What's going on?"

My mom began to wring her hands. That was never a good sign. She sighed, "I think we all need to sit down and talk.. but not tonight. Is that okay, Vicky?"

I paused for a minute as I thought about it. I stared into my mom's eyes. She was always trying to protect me. Even if I was upset or didn't like her decisions, more often than not she's right. I trusted her.

I nodded my head, "Okay." I stole a glance at my dad before I turned to walk out of the room. He smiled at me reassuringly. A part of me is comforted. In another part of my heart, it had the opposite effect.

I quickly made my way to my room.

[**********]

On Sunday, I had to go to Leira's house. Oddly, when I was tiptoeing out of my room and out the door, my mom and my father were in the kitchen. Mom was making breakfast while my father stood leaning against the counter. They were talking. Mom was frowning. I didn't want to know, at least not yet, so I silently made my way out the front door. The way they acted last night, it frightened me a little.

There were pros and cons to going to Leira's house. The pros were, it gave me something to do to get out of the house and I missed Leira so I would be happy to see her. Cons? As much as I missed Leira, I knew there would be a lot of things I had to tell her, a lot of questions I would have to answer. Some of which, I probably didn't even know the answer to. It seemed daunting.

I sighed as I turned on to Leira's street. If anyone deserved to ask questions, it was Leira. She cared about me. She may have been my first true and honest-to-God friend. I owed her explanations.

So, I would do the best I could. That was my last thought as I climbed out of my car, across the lawn, and on to Leira's porch. I knocked on the glass panel on the door and stepped back as I waited for someone to answer.

Suddenly, a male form encased in a gray t-shirt appeared in the muddled view of the window and before I could decipher a face, they were opening the door. I heard myself gasp in shock. It was Lennox.

It was almost comical. I even stepped further back and glanced at the house. Inwardly, I sighed relief. Okay, good. My subconscious had not sent me to Lennox's house by accident. I was at Leira's. So then... what was Lennox doing at Leira's?

My cheeks heated with the effort I put into restraining the red-hot jealously that tried to claw its way out of my throat and into my brain. I gulped once and croaked, "Wha - "

Lennox interrupted me, and as if he read my mind quickly said, "Leira was helping me catch up with some stuff in Flog's class.. I've been here all morning.. but we're done now.. And uh, I was just...", he stared at me searchingly, "leaving." I then noticed the backpack hanging carelessly from his shoulder.

I nodded, unable to answer. I put my car keys in the pocket of my sweats and left my hand there. I cleared my throat.

His mouth crooked into a half-smile, "Y'know, I've never seen you like this. You look so relaxed. Vulnerable, even."

I shrugged, not exactly shure how to respond. My face was bare of makeup, my hair windblown all around my face, a Walking Dead t-shirt, grey sweats, and sneakers. I looked like Snow White.

I wasn't sure how I felt about his observation. I looked down at the ground and then back up into his eyes. He was staring at me.

"What?", I blurted. I swallowed and fought the urge to wince. I was little loud.

"I just..", suddenly he stepped closer. "Vicky - "

"Hey!" Jeez! It was Leira. I jumped as Lennox turned around to show her standing in the doorway, smiling.

I smiled half-heartedly at her, "Hey."

"How long have you been standing out here?"

"Not very long.", I gave her another lopsided smile, "Lennox was just saying bye." There was an awkward silence. My mind suddenly drifted to the scene in the cafeteria, which happened to be the last time Lennox, er, said goodbye.

"Yeah.", Lennox mumbled, "See ya later." He then jumped off the porch and made his way to the street where a navy blue truck was parked.

"I didn't know he had a car.", I mused.

"It's his stepdad's.", I nodded as I watched Lennox and the truck disappear down the street. "Uuuh, Vicky. He's gone now. You can let your breath go."

I looked wide-eyed at Leira. She laughed at my expression, "Come on.", she said, "You can tell me what's up while I fix us some food."

[*********]

"Oh my gosh. Vicky, that's so... how are you?"

After Leira had warmed us up some leftover spaghetti and toasted us some garlic bread, we went into her room. We were now sitting on her bed, talking. I first told her about hanging with Jess and Darby at the mall when I had left school. Then I laid on the heavy stuff. I told her about my mom being back with a whole lot more than what she left with.

I shrugged and mumbled, "I'm okay.", I paused as I poked my fork in a meatball,"I actually don't have any solid feelings about my dad being back.. I mean I cried. But now.. it's like I'm numb." I frowned as I chewed and swallowed. I looked up at Leira.

Leira was looking at me sympathetically. She shrugged one shoulder slowly, "Maybe.. you don't have any feelings because you haven't talked to them yet."

I thought about it. Then I nodded, "Yeah, probably.", I then shook my head vigorously, "On to more light stuff. What's been going on with you?"

Leira raised a brow, "So I couldn't be going through anything heavy?"

I looked at Leira sideways, "I don't knoow... Are you?"

She paused, snorted, and then rolled her eyes smiling, "Well no. But you shouldn't assume."

I giggled, "Right. So Leira, what's going on in your crazy life?" She glared at me. Then we both burst into laughter.

I loved Leira. She was the best. But then a nagging little voice whispered in the back of mind, You still didn't tell her about you.

Well, that was another conversation for a whole different day.

[********]

When I walked back into my house, it was near eleven o'clock. I knew Mom wouldn't be too pleased, but maybe in the likes of recent events she would give me a break? I closed the front door quietly.

"Victoriez!" I groaned silently. She was in the living room. I made my way towards the living room. Oh, no. It was worst than I thought. She was sitting on the couch with my dad.

Before I could even formulate an excuse, my mom was speaking, "Where were you all day?"

My eyebrows furrowed as I sat on the cushioned seat next to the couch, "I was at Leira's. What's the deal?" I glanced at my dad. He was looking at me with one of those father-upset-with-daughter-looks. It's funny, it's like he never left. Funny in the way I didn't feel like laughing.

My mom sighed, "Victoriez, you know you could have at least poked your head in and said something. We need to know where you are and compromise on a time you'll be back." We?

I narrowed my eyes, as a thought came to my head, "Wait. Did you two sleep in the same room?"

My mom blushed fiercely, "That's not important."

I stared at the both of them in horror. My eyes then set on my mom, "Mom!"

Mom rolled her eyes, "Victoriez, may I remind you who is the adult here."

I raised a brow as I looked at her incredulously. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "What the hell is going on around here!?"

"Victoriez!", my dad exclaimed. I shot him a glare.

My mom cleared her throat, "Alright, that's enough. I think it's time we had that talk."

Oh boy.