A.N. Did this in under fifteen minutes when I got bored. To all those that know me personally and might be reading this, if you comment anything about my personal life here I promise I will kick your butt all the way to China and back.
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I struggled to get a hold on my emotions as I closed the internet window. Jealousy does not exist. Hurt does not exist. Sadness does not exist. They are figments of my imagination, things imposed on me by society, and I had no time for them.

I would not allow myself to indulge in those… things. I couldn't let myself become weak and so I could not let myself wallow in these things like an overfed pig in mud. Because before I know it I'll turn into one of those blubbering useless bimbos on TV who want to kill themselves just because the boy they had a crush on didn't like them back. I'd turn into exactly what I hated, an idiotic, irrational crying wreck.

I could not indulge in these emotions because of a mere crush. He was my friend. We were just friends. I was happy for him. The bloke finally got a girlfriend. At last.

Besides, logically speaking, I wouldn't have had a chance in a million years. I was rough, the last time he saw me I took every chance I had to mock him and tease him, and I knew for a fact our relationship was purely platonic as far as he was concerned.

So why did I feel like I was carrying a huge weight? Why did I just want to pretend this never happened?

Because I was turning into an irrational, blubbering, useless wreck of an especially idiotic airhead.

Anger flared up in me and I used it to force all my other emotions into a deep, dark pit where they would never see the light of day until I wanted them to, then shoved my anger down that same pit. It shouldn't have taken so much effort.

I shouldn't have let myself indulge in those feelings even for a second, much less enough time to curl up in my computer chair and feel a huge weight settle on me. Because I was happy for him. I was his friend and that was enough. I'd get over it.

I had to.