It Means Everything, a Biography story | SparkaTale

Sparkatale

It Means Everything

By: Camilla Christoffersen

Status: Completed

Summary:

A One Shot/Short Story about my childhood. Sad, but true.

Created: January 16, 2014 | Updated: January 16, 2014

Genre : Biography

Language : English

Reviews: 1 | Rating:

Comments: 1

Favorites: 0

Reads: 223


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1: Emotions 534
Total Wordcount: 534

Reviews (1)


  • Tara McClaine

    A Fantastic piece! Bravo!! I liked it alot!!! I loved the way you described your feelings! Nice one!

    Rating:
    January 17, 2014 Flag


Comments / Critiques


    • Chapter: 1 Reply

      Very honest writing, which a lot of people struggle with. You seem to write from the heart, and for the most part try not to over-dramatize things for their own sake.

      The past tense - present tense hard switching was interesting, and well done. When it could easily have detriment your story it instead helped separate how you once felt from how you now felt. Simplicity of your described emotions were refreshingly realistic, likely from its implications in your actual life as described in summary.

      My critique to offer for consideration is that it can be off-putting to place smaller or greater language gravity on some things than others when using this particular style of descriptive mapping. The main one that caught me as I read, and lead me to glance back at previous examples, was the ellipsis based emphasis on being abused by loved ones in the latter part of the story. While you are understandably trying to convey that this hurt the most, and believe me I understand, but doing so eclipses your other pain. Emphasis to create a final hammer strike on the nail of your message to the reader: Good; emphasis to the point of overwhelming your previous points: Not so much.

      Good read though, and very obvious display of talent that can grow with just a little bit of TLC & practice.

      February 15, 2014 | L. W.